Explicit Memory

by Scarlett Finn

  ‘That room, that basement, the female abductees saw Victor order you upstairs with Simone. What if she claims that was under duress? What if she claims you had sex? You told them you’d have sex with me... that you had had sex with me.’

  ‘If you tell the cops that it was consensual, then they’ll have no reason to disbelieve that,’ Liam said. ‘You’re still together now for crissakes, he’d have to be a monster to have been raping you all this time.’

  ‘It’s not impossible,’ Flick said. ‘They kept Serendipity for months. They could have subjected her to any number of horrors.’

  ‘If they can pin the abduction charges on him, coupled with prolonged abuse like that, and possibly murder too… he’ll never get out of jail. He’ll be in for life.’

  ‘Which is why we have to prove that he’s innocent.’ No reassurance came from Rushe, he merely expelled a long exhale. ‘Stop toying and talk,’ she said, sensing the thoughts rattling through his mind.

  ‘You’re both off track, and you’ve missed the most vital factor in all of this.’

  ‘Which is?’ Flick asked, knowing that he had the most experience in the room.

  ‘Whether the cops, or feds, believe I raped you, or anyone, doesn’t matter. The second captain was destroying evidence for a reason. Who was he doing it for? The Merciers? The feds? Was he covering his own ass? Or somebody else’s? And what is it that they don’t want us to see?’ Rushe asked.

  ‘Yeah,’ Liam exhaled. ‘You’re right. If this is corrupt at all levels, then they can frame anything, anyway that they want. We can’t trust anyone. We have no way to know if the Merciers are paying off any of the investigating feds either. Evidence be damned, they can destroy it.’

  ‘Or fabricate it,’ Rushe said.

  ‘We can collect it all,’ Liam said. ‘But we’d eventually have to turn it over to the authorities, especially if they already have you in custody and we’re trying to get you out.’

  ‘And that’s when it would start to disappear,’ Rushe said. ‘Nothing is secure until we know who is looking over our shoulder.’

  ‘But the only person we can trust,’ Flick said. ‘The only cop we can trust is...’

  ‘Jansen,’ Rushe said.

  ‘The guy in the hospital?’ Liam asked, folding his arms. ‘I thought he went rogue and took on the traffickers in a rage of revenge?’

  ‘They imprisoned his woman. Can you think of a better reason to want to punish the fuckers?’ Rushe asked.

  ‘Why didn’t he come to us?’ Flick said.

  ‘He’d have had no way to get in touch with us,’ Rushe said. ‘I’d have told him to go to hell if he called, because if I had a choice you’d be nowhere near any of this shit.’

  ‘Serendipity might know the details of what Jansen was doing,’ Flick said. ‘If I could get back in to talk to her.’

  ‘Where were they holding her?’

  ‘In an apartment,’ Flick said. ‘It’s in the city. I expected to be travelling for hours, but we weren’t. She’s in a perfectly normal city apartment.’

  ‘Could you find it again?’ Rushe asked, turning his mouth against her head when he propped himself down on the table and nestled her in the vee of his thighs.

  ‘No,’ she said, aware of her crappy sense of direction. ‘They blindfolded me, and I—‘

  ‘It’s ok,’ Rushe said, actually pursing his lips against her. Today was a day for kissing, apparently. ‘Unless I could bust in and take the place for you to make it completely secure, then you wouldn’t be going back there anyway.’

  ‘We could go to Jansen’s apartment, or Serendipity’s,’ she said. ‘See if there’s anything—‘

  ‘The cops, or the Merciers, will have already gone through them, I’ll bet. But I can get a guy to—‘

  Rapping on the door had Rushe cracking upright, his body swooped around Flick. His arm came around to lock her in place against his back.

  ‘Expecting company? What have you brought to us, Hutten?’ Rushe demanded.

  ‘Relax,’ she assuaged, sliding her hand down his arm. Swerving around him, Flick went to the door and opened it before Rushe could snatch her and tie her to something.

  ‘I got the—‘Eric stopped as soon as he came in and clocked Rushe.

  Her lover was already striding across the room, so Flick hurried to intercept him. But planting her hands on his ribs didn’t stall him, so she actually slid back a foot and a half on the hardwood flooring before he stopped moving forward.

  ‘What the fuck is he doing here?’

  ‘You said you weren’t gonna lie to him,’ Eric proclaimed, backing toward the exit.

  ‘I didn’t, but I didn’t get a chance to mention you,’ Flick said, trying to decipher the rage displayed in her lover’s expression. She hadn’t mentioned Eric because she hadn’t thought his involvement was a big deal, and he hadn’t come up in conversation to make him relevant enough to discuss. It hadn’t occurred to her to make a point of mentioning him. ‘I don’t understand—‘

  ‘Bedroom?’ Rushe asked.

  Liam pointed to a door further down from the front door on a perpendicular wall. Rushe snatched the back of her neck and spun her around to propel her toward it. Her lover practically threw her into the room, so she stumbled as she listened to the door slam. Whirling around, Flick was met by him crowding into her personal space.

  ‘Quite a band of men you’re assembling, Kitten. Are you building your own little gang?’

  ‘What the hell is your problem?’

  ‘What does working alone mean to you?’

  ‘Lover,’ she said, but when her fingertips touched his pockets, he batted them away and paced off, keeping his back to her. ‘Why are you upset?’

  ‘I work alone,’ he said, pivoting around. ‘I don’t want them out there. I don’t trust them.’

  ‘You trust me,’ Flick said. ‘If you think I’m going to stand aside and let these lunatic criminals indict you for their misdeeds, then you’re crazy! No one gets to tear you down! There is no way I’ll stand aside and let that happen! I’ll raise a goddamn army if—‘

  ‘You’ll do what you’re told! We don’t involve other people. They’re gonna screw us over. We don’t rely on them, we don’t rely on anyone. Eric is careless, you can’t trust him, and Hutten doesn’t have a clue what he’s doing.’

  Rushe didn’t shout, but when he was pissed off like this his already deep voice got lower and rumbled up out of him all the way from his diaphragm.

  ‘I need to be able to support you, Rushe. We’re not going to run and hide, we’re going to fight! You taught me how important it is to stand up for what’s right, and this is right.’

  ‘We’re not sharing our shit with them. I’m not gonna sit there and pretend we’re all buddies, ‘cause we’re not. We don’t need them, we don’t need anyone.’

  ‘There’s nothing wrong with asking for help,’ she said. ‘Having allies—‘

  ‘I won’t do it. You don’t know what it is to be screwed over and left in the shit. The more people involved, the harder it is to control, to foresee the problems that—‘

  ‘We’re all here to work together—‘

  ‘I won’t do it,’ he said, and turned to aim for the exit.

  ‘You’re walking out on me,’ Flick said, knowing that the words would stall him. ‘I’d do anything for you, Rushe, anything in the world. These men are going to help me keep you near to me. They’ll help me to do what’s right, because I can’t do it alone. I’m not as strong as you, or as experienced. I need help, Rushe. I won’t let you get in the way of me ensuring your freedom.’

  ‘I work alone,’ he grumbled, without turning around.

  ‘I know this is uncomfortable for you. I know that you’ve had to adapt to having me in your life, and that wasn’t an easy adjustment for you to make. Accepting help from others goes against your nature, so I’ll deal with this, Lover. I won’t make this harder for you, but don’t make it harder for me, either. If you want to
leave, then leave. I won’t stop you. But I’m staying here, because fighting for you matters more to me than anything, and I need those men in there to help me do it well.’

  Bracing herself for what would come next, Flick couldn’t speculate as to how he would respond to this development. Anticipating Rushe’s actions wasn’t always simple for her, no matter how hard she tried. Often it was made more difficult because she didn’t have all of the relevant data. All she could be sure of was their trust and their love, and if Rushe needed space she would give it to him, every time. Pushing him too hard would only make him rebel, and she wasn’t going to risk losing him emotionally again.

  Having her doing research and fighting for him was a struggle enough for Rushe to accept. He’d probably have tolerated Liam, because the IT guy didn’t have criminal connections and he had proved that he could keep his mouth shut. Seeing Eric come in to join them had obviously been a step too far and brought matters too close to home for Rushe to be comfortable with.

  His hesitation to depart wasn’t sustained. Rushe’s hand rose to the door handle, and he strode out of the bedroom. Flick followed but made no attempt to chase or harangue him.

  ‘Rushe,’ Eric said, and began to approach, but Rushe was en route for the front door.

  ‘Let him go,’ Flick said, stopping to wrap her arms around herself.

  Then just like that Rushe slammed out of the apartment and left them all in reverberating silence.

  ‘Flick...?’ Liam asked.

  ‘We have work to do,’ she said. ‘Nothing changes.’

  Rushe had been here so briefly, but he’d already helped so much. Re-directing their focus to the core of the issue gave Flick new ideas and new concerns. If physical evidence was irrelevant, then people were all that mattered, and the Mercier side had a leading edge on the manipulation and intimidation of potential witnesses.

  ‘Where’s he going?’ Liam asked.

  ‘Forget about Rushe,’ she said. ‘Do you know where the police captains are now?’

  Moving back to the dining table, she began to gather up all of the documentation. Suddenly, having so much paper seemed unprofessional and risky.

  ‘I can get their addresses,’ Liam said. ‘Do you think they’ll talk to you?’

  ‘No,’ Flick said. ‘But I want to know where they are. Jansen had to be onto something, or close, and Victor knew when Jansen talked to his superiors, so someone is paying attention.’

  ‘He’s in the hospital,’ Eric said, taking hold of one of the chair backs opposite her when she finished stacking the papers.

  ‘I need you to go to Serendipity’s today,’ she said.

  ‘Wait, wait, wait,’ Eric said. ‘I don’t know what’s going on. Who are these police captains?’

  ‘We’ll bring you up to speed, but you have to go there today, tonight at the latest, because tomorrow you’re taking me home.’

  ‘Whoa, what?’

  ‘You came to Rushe for help when Scott needed it, and he said no,’ she said. ‘You got him on board, he helped you, and Scott, because of one thing.’

  ‘You,’ Eric sighed.

  A moment of nothingness passed. ‘What’s the deal with you and Rushe?’ Liam asked Eric.

  ‘I’ll make coffee,’ Flick said, unwilling to let Rushe be discussed any further. ‘Liam, bring us up to date with what you have on the internal investigation, then I’ll tell Eric what to look for at Serendipity’s.’

  These men would mobilise for her, but Rushe struggled to understand their motives. Someone simply wanting to help him out of kindness was alien to him. He relied on the primal instinct of fight or flight. Liam and Eric were here by her request so Rushe couldn’t fight them, but his discomfort fired those primitive impulses and so he had only one other choice - flight.

  Flick would bring him around to the idea, but just as it had taken him time to accept their relationship, it would take him time to accept friendship. She couldn’t undo a lifetime of conditioning overnight, and until Rushe was open to the concept of outside aid, she would fight on for him.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Nothing in the information they had so far was the silver bullet that she was looking for. But they weren’t going to find anything that would cure them of the disease threatening them. They couldn’t approach anyone in the police department or the FBI, because they couldn’t trust them. They didn’t operate on the right side of the law either, so they couldn’t pick up a phone and ask for official help. With all that Rushe had been responsible for in his past, any direct contact with the authorities would likely lead to them incriminating him, and that would make things much worse.

  If the Merciers found out that Flick was trying to prove Rushe’s innocence, then they might speed up their plans to have him arrested anyway. But Rushe had planted a seed in picking out the police captains, and Flick wanted to know what those two men knew.

  Because they could run back and report to the Merciers, walking up to them and asking out-right would not be a possibility. But she supposed surveillance was an option, though she would need Rushe’s guidance on how to approach that. An hour or so had passed since Rushe had left, and she felt stalled, sluggish, and useless.

  ‘This is so frustrating,’ she sighed. ‘How can we have all of this information, but have none of it be of any use to us?’

  ‘You’ve gotta consider that...’ Eric trailed off.

  ‘What?’

  Clasping his hands, he leaned forward in the seat opposite her that he occupied. ‘They have a case. If the cops get hold of Rushe, then he’s going down for something. He was involved, and he has taken part in criminal acts. Once he’s arrested, that’s it, game over. Do you see Rushe calmly cooperating while they control his every move?’

  He’d be powerless and frustrated, and as much as she hated to admit it, Eric had a point. ‘No.’

  ‘The Merciers are going to keep coming at you,’ Eric said. ‘Even if you prove that Rushe is innocent, or gather enough evidence to prove it, they can still have him arrested. It still causes him a lot of hassle and opens him up to a lot of questions that he won’t want to answer.’

  ‘I know.’

  ‘It might not be the best idea to try and logic your way out of this,’ Eric said.

  ‘What do you suggest?’ she asked.

  ‘If you won’t do what they want and testify against Rushe, then you have to find something that they want more than his incarceration,’ Eric said.

  ‘Like what?’ Liam asked, from his position two place settings up from Eric.

  ‘Money?’

  ‘No,’ Flick shook her head. ‘Rushe said they wouldn’t be paid off. He’s already working for Silver because Antoine wants him to. If that’s not enough...’

  ‘Rushe doesn’t work for anyone unless it’s a means to an end,’ Eric said, with an arising frown.

  ‘He’s keeping them alive,’ Liam said. ‘That sounds like a legitimate ends to me.’

  ‘It’s not as simple as that,’ Eric muttered to himself, while watching Flick intently. ‘Nothing’s as simple as that where Rushe is concerned.’

  ‘We’re not here to investigate Rushe, we’re here to figure a way out of this mess,’ Flick said, casting aside her own curiosity about Rushe’s debt to Silver. ‘Rushe isn’t going to take the fall, and I’m not going to roll over on him. Building a legitimate case is seeming less and less feasible, especially without knowing what Jansen knew. We need to speak to witnesses, to try and build a case as a safety net, in case the cops do come for Rushe. I want to be prepared for that. But maybe you’re right, maybe I can find out if there’s anything else that Antoine will settle for instead. There could be another way to make this go away, and I won’t know unless I ask him.’

  ‘Negotiate,’ Liam said. ‘Do you think it’s wise to try and negotiate with a human trafficker? That’s dangerous. I mean, who knows what else he could be involved in. You could get hurt.’

  ‘I guess Hutten doesn’t know what you were doing
a couple of weeks ago, huh?’

  ‘Was that a threat?’ Flick asked, narrowing her eyes, and a jolt of horror went through Eric.

  ‘No! No, I meant he doesn’t know what you’re capable of.’

  Flick hadn’t known the extent of what she was capable of until Rushe had died for her. ‘There must be something else Antoine wants. If he wanted us dead, then he’d have done it by now. I have to take the risk and ask him. I wanted to go home to check on my family. But that gives me the cover I need to have a conversation with Mercier. While I’m up there, you can keep digging, Liam.’

  ‘Why?’ Liam asked. ‘If you’re going to negotiate terms to have them all leave you alone, then—‘

  ‘Backup,’ Flick said. ‘I want to know what we’re dealing with. I don’t trust Antoine. If they’re still trafficking, and we can expose their criminal—‘

  ‘Wait a minute,’ Liam said, holding up his hands. ‘Ensuring your freedom, Rushe’s too, that’s one thing. But you can’t expect to bust open the trafficking they could be involved with.’

  ‘You don’t even know if it got off the ground after Victor’s gang was eliminated,’ Eric said. ‘The whole thing could’ve fallen apart.’

  ‘Best case scenario,’ Flick said. ‘But until we know that for sure, we have to suspect otherwise. The more we know about them, then the more leverage we have. Antoine’s family is in France, and I doubt Simone has too many weak spots, unless we threaten to sew her legs together.’

  Eric laughed, but Liam was horrified, and Flick regretted that her glibness made him feel uncomfortable. Her frustration caused her to lash out with the snide comment, but Liam was too kind to ever consider such insults acceptable.

  ‘I gotta say,’ Eric said. ‘You got some set of balls, Flick.’

  ‘Yeah,’ she exhaled, letting her gaze fall to her half-full coffee mug.

  The real life testicles she’d lay claim to were too far away from her now. Rushe had been correct about her not feeling right when they weren’t together, because even with everything that was going on, she couldn’t get her lover out of her mind.