FRACTURED

by Amber Lynn Natusch

  Seanplacedhishandonthebackofmyneck,scaringtheshitoutof me.Ihadn'theardhimcomein.

  “She'strulyamazing,”hewhisperedinmyear.Myhairreflexively stoodonend.

  “Iknow,”IrepliedasIlookedon.WatchingPeytahealwas anticlimactictosaytheleast,whichonlyillustratedfurtherhowgifted shewas.ShewasacompletecontrasttoSophie,makingmewonderifall theHealershadtheirownmethods,orifPeytawasoneofakind.

  IguessIalreadyknewtheanswertothat.

  Ali'sbodyslowlyrepaireditselfrightbeforemyeyes,lesseningthe sharppaininmyheart.Itwasstrangetowatchtheshimmerysilver dropletspressupoutofhiswoundsandsolidifyonhischestand abdomen,butwitheverybitthatcameup,hiscomplexionrosied, enliveninghisappearance.

  “Ruby,”shecalled,notturningherfocusawayfromherpatient.

  “Comecollectthesesilverpiecesforme,please.Andtakehisshirtoff too.Idon'twantanythingresidualgettingintothewoundsthathaven't closedyet.”

  Ididasshebademeandpickedthefinebeadsofmetaloffofhis body,delicatelyremovinghistatteredshirtintheprocess.Aflashoflight broughtmyattentionuptothedogtagsstillhangingaroundhisneck―a tokenofhisbondtotheLondonpack.Iwantedtotearthemoffand destroythem.Instead,Ireachedupandpulledthemoverhisneckas gingerlyaspossible.Hedidn'tbelongtothemanymore.

  ThesecondItouchedthemScarletgrowledviciouslyinmymind.

  Getridofthemnow...

  “Why?What'swrong?”Iasked,lookinglikethecrazygirlwho talkedtoherselfyetagain.Ihadn'tmissedthat.

  Thatsound.Canyounothearit?It'smaddening.Getridofthem!

  “OhmyGod...,”Iwhispered,staringdownattheseemingly innocuouschaininmyhand.“Sean,it'sthetags!Takethemoffofthe others.Now!”

  Itossedthemathim,andforasplitsecondhehesitated,thensent Jaydowntoremovetheitemsinquestionfromhisprisoners.Thekeysto Tobias'mindcontrol.

  Youtrulycouldn'tsensethat,couldyou?

  “No,Ididn'tfeel―hear―senseanything.”

  Therewasahumming...avibrationbefore,butthesecondyou touchedthem,itwasunbearable.

  “I'mgoingtosendthemtoTreyforanalysis,”Seaninterjected.

  “He'llfindwhateverishiddeninthosedogtags.”Hiseyeswidenedand fadedtoblack.“AndthenI'llfindwhoevermadethem.”

  “ Tobiasknows,”Ali'shoarsevoicecalledfromthecouch.“Ask him.”

  “I'mafraidhe'salittletoodeadforthat,Alistair,”Seantoldhim grimly.“TimeforplanB.”

  “Andwhat'sthat?”Iasked,feelingalittlenervous.

  “IthinkI'llbemakingatripacrossthepondagain.Tobiascan'tbe theonlyonewhoknewaboutthis.Whoeverhissecondincommandwas islikelytoknowaswell.HeandIaregoingtohaveachat.”

  Alistairbegantopushhimselfupoffofthesofa,andSeanquickly scoopedPeytaoffofthefloorandputherdownsafelybehindhim.He wasn'tgoingtoriskanythinghappeningtoher,andrightfullyso.Shewas thebestthingtohappentothePCincenturies.

  “I'vegotthedogtags,”Jaycalledfromsomewherenearthebottom ofthestairwell.

  “CallTrey.Tellhimwehaveapickupforhimandtogetonitnow.

  Andtelltheboystolettheothersoutnow.Therandomsurvivorscanbe releasedtoTreywhenhearrives.Asfortheothers,bringthemuphere.”

  “Doyouthinkhecansortitout?”IaskedSean,worriedaboutthe implicationsofTreyfailing.

  “Weshallsoonsee.”

  Sean'sgazefellonAlistair,whowasrapidlygaininghisstrength back.Hestoodbeforemelookingonlyalittleworseforthewear.

  “You,”Seanrumbled,“havesomeexplainingtodo.”

  Muchtomysurprise,Alididn'tsayanythingevenremotely belligerent.HemayhavedetestedSean,butheknewthathewasright.He didhaveexplainingtodo,butnottoSean―tomeandCooper.JustasI wasthinkingthat,Ali'ssubmissiveeyestookachanceonmeetingmine.

  Thesadnessinthemwaspainfultosee.

  “Ruby,”hestarted,quicklyavertinghisgaze.“Idon'tevenknow wheretostart.”

  “Tryfromthebeginning,”Cooperorderedfromdeepinthehallway outside.“Iwantedthemtokeepyouallalive,butthatwasonlybecauseI wantedtohearthetruth,andI'dbettergetjustthat.Tomy satisfaction.”

  Cooperwasclearlybacktonormal.

  “Noteverythingwasalie.Themissingwolvespartwastrue.They didkillJemmatoo,”hesaid,againlookingupatme,thistimewithtears inhiseyes.“Theykilledherstonecolddead.”

  “Andtherest?”Seanprodded.

  Alisighed.

  “Therestwaspartialtruthssmatteredwithlies.”Hisexpressionwas painedbutfrustrated.“It'shardtodiscernwhat'srealandwhat'snot anymore.We'vehadthosetagsforalongtimenow.Muchhashappened sinceweweregiventhem.Ijustdon'tknow...”

  “Hespeaksthetruth,”Janneradded,joiningthepartyintheliving room.“Truthandfictionweresointerwoventhat,now,it'shardtotell onefromtheother.Youhavetounderstandthatweneverconsciously knewwhatTobias'planswereorthathewasevenusingusatall.He orchestratedthisentirething―letusgoonpurpose―thenstrategically guidedusalongtheway.”Hiseyesfelltothefloor,ashamedofwhathad happened.“I'mcertainnowthatourmeetingwashardlyachance encounter.”

  “Didyoucomeheretotakeheraway?”Cooperasked,hiseyes harboringthetiniestglintofgoldinthem.“Iwouldanswerthatquestion verycarefully,friend.”

  “ItisasIsaid,Cooper.Factistoohardtofilterfromfalsehood rightnow.It'sasthoughtwoseparatepartsofourbrainsranatthesame time.Wewere,forallintentsandpurposes,ourtrueselves.Themoments wherewetrulyfeltlikewewereoneofyouweregenuine.Theywereour stories,ourpersonalities,ouraccountsofhoweventsunfolded,atleast forthemostpart.Othertimes...Ijustcan'texplainit.Ican'tremember sayingordoingcertainthingsthatledustothispoint,butI knowthey happenedbecauseIcanclearlyreplaytheminmymind.WhateverTobias stumbleduponisatrulyfrighteningcreation.Youdon'trealizewhat's happeningtoyouevenasit'shappening.Thereisnoconsciousaction, eventhoughthereisconsciousness.”

  “Idon'tbelieveyou,”Coopergrowled.“PartofmeknewthatwhatI wasdoingwaswrong,Ijustcouldn'trememberwhy.”

  “Yes,”Beckettsaid,comingtostandbesideJanner.“Butyouhad onlyjuststartedwearingDeacon'stagsandyou'reRuby'salpha.Your connectiontoherismuchstrongerthanours.We'vewornourtagsforfar longerthanIcanremember.We'vebecomedesensitizedtothefeeling youspeakof,butIknowit.Ihadittoo,once.Thewayhestartedwithus wassoslowandsubtlethatweneverreallyrealizedwhatwasgoingon.”

  WhileCooperandSeangrilledthethreemen,Itriedtoreachoutfor whattheywerefeeling,andmoreimportantly,toseeifIcoulddetectany ofthatstrangereservedenergythatIpickedupfromthempreviously.

  Therewasn'tanounceofitleft.WhateverholdTobiashadoncehadon themwasgone.Forgood.Thequestionthatplaguedmymindwas,ifthey couldbecontrolledonce,couldtheybemanipulatedagain?

  IrealizedthatCooperwasaskingmesomethingandsnappedoutof mytrance-likestate.

  “Whatdoyouthink?”heasked,lookingfullyannoyedthathe'dhad torepeathimself.“Shouldtheystayorleave?”

  “Stay.”

  Myvoicewasfirmaswasmystanceontheissue.Theywerenota threattome,oranyoneelseforthatmatter―notanylonger.Furthermore, itwasn'ttheirfault.WouldIholdtheirunconsciousactionsagainstthem?

  WouldIwantwhatevermessScarlethadcausedinmyabsenceheld againstme?Icringedatthatthought,thinkingthatwasaconversationI stillhadtohavewithher.

  Seaninhaled
deeplyandslowlybesideme.Hewasn'thappywith myplan.

  “AnddoIhaveasayinthis?”heasked,cockinghiseyebrowatme.

  Itwasn'tinaplayfulway,thoughIwishedithadbeen.

  “Whatisyoursay?”Iwasavoidinghisquestionwithanotherone, whichusuallyworkedaboutaswellastryingtooutrunhim,butIthrewit outthereanywaytoseewhatwouldhappen.

  “Idon'tlikeit,”heinformedme,“butIsupposeifcertainground rulesarelaidandCooperagrees,Iwillallowit.”

  TheMaineboysandIwhippedourcollectiveheadstowardCooper toseewhathisfinaldecidingvotewouldbe.HelookedasuneasyasSean felt.Withaloudsigh,hedeliveredhisverdict.

  “Theycanstay.”Isquealed,thenstifledtherestofittolethim finish.ThelookheflashedmeinformedmethatIwasinterruptingthe restofhisspeech.“Butononecondition.Theyanswerto me.Theyare mine―partofthepack,andallthatthatimplies.”Jannerlookedrelieved.

  Beckettlookedindifferent.Alistairlookedsad.“Andifanyofyoufuck upintheslightest,you'redead,understand?”

  Theyallnoddedonce.

  “I'mtrustingyoutohandlethis,Cooper,”Seansaidintonethatlet Cooperknowwhowas reallyincharge.“Don'tmakemelivetoregretit.”

  Thetwoformidablemeneyedeachothertightly,sayingnothing.

  Thetensiongrewbythesecond,andIjustcouldn'tdeal.Somethinghad togive.

  “Grouphug!”Ishouted,divingatthenewestpackmembers.They laughedatmeasalways,butloosenedupenoughtoletmeknowthat therewasgenuineaffectionontheirend.“Cooper,getinhere,”Iordered mockingly.“Comefeelthelove,bigguy.It'sabeautifulthing.”

  “I'mgood,”hereplied,stillstandingnexttoSean.“I'mgettingtons ofloveoverhere.Noneedformore.”

  Aftergettingmysqueezeonwiththenewguys,Iturnedtoaddress thebroodingduoafewfeetawayfromme.Aquickscanoftheroom alertedmetoaglaringabsence.Twoabsences,actually.

  “Where'sPeyta?”Iasked,movingtowardthedoortogetaclearer viewoftheroom.“AndJay?”

  Justastheothersbegantolookconcerned,avoicefromthe stairwellcalmedthemall.

  “Outhere,”Jaycalled,soundingmildlysheepish.Heopenedthe frontdoorandwalkedinwithPeytatrailingbehindhim,herhand claspingtightlytohis.Itmademesmile.

  “So,”Istartedinmymostbadgeringtone.“Whathaveyoutwo beendoing?Didyougeteverythingallworkedout?”

  “We'regood,Ruby,”Peytareplied,blushingslightly.“Wehada littletalk.”

  “Oh,didyou?Anddidyoutalkabout everything?”ThelookIgave herwasoneofwarning―onethatsaidthatnowwasthetimetoairher dirtylaundrytohimandnotkeepitasecret.Iknewalotabouthowbadly thatapproachended.

  “Yes. Everything.”

  Ismiledandgaveheranodofapproval.Sheblushedslightlyand tuckedherheadinclosetoJay'sarm,shelteringheremotionsfromher audience.

  “Sean,”Jaysaid,soundinguncharacteristicallyformal.“Iwishtobe boundtoPeyta.ItisyourjobtopicktheHealerforthePCandbindherto us,butwehavechoseneachother.Whatistobedone?”

  Seanlookedpensiveforamoment,weighingsomethingheavilyin hismind.ItwasthemomentI'dfearedanddutifullyignoredformonths.

  I'dalwayshatedthethoughtofPeytabeingtetheredtoourlifeof violence,buteventuallyreconciledthefactthatitwaswhoshewas.It wasmeanttobe.Officialornot,shewasalreadysurroundedbythechaos thatthesupernaturalworldwasfraughtwith.ThatwasafactIhadslowly cometotermswith.

  WhatIhadn'tcometotermswithwasknowingthatSeanwould havetobetheonetobindhertothebrothers.

  “Iwillfindasolution,Jay,”hesaidfinally,breakingthesilencethat hadbeengrowing.“Forbothoursakes,Iwillfindaway.”Peytabolted forSeananddidoneofherflyingsquirrelmoves,latchingontohimat thelastsecondandhugginghimviolently.“You'rewelcome,Peyta,”he said,wrappinghisarmsaroundhertinyframe,emphasizingtheirvast sizedifference.

  “Um,P?”Cooperhadthemostperplexedlookonhisface.“Isn't yourmothergoingtoshitabrickwhenshehearsaboutthislittle marriageidea?Whatexactlyareyougoingtotellher?Shedoesn'teven knowwhatJayis,andthinkinghe'sawerewolfisn'tanybetter.Andthen there'syourwholeageissue...”

  “I'lldealwithher,”shesaid,climbingdownfromSean.“She'sso happylatelythatI'mnotevensureit'llbeaproblem.”

  “Well,eitherway,Iwouldmakesurethefirearmsaren'tloaded first.AndmakesureJayisn'twithyou.It'llbesaferforeveryone.”

  PeytaandIgaveeachotheraknowingglancethenstartedtogiggle.

  “That'saproblemforanotherday,”Seaninformedusoverthe laughter.“It'slate.Timeforeveryonetogo.”

  Coopermadehiswayovertomeandscoopedmeup,liftingme easilyofftheground.

  “I'msorry,Rubes,”hewhisperedinmyear.

  “Waterunderthebridge,”Iwhisperedback.“Iloveyou,Coop.That guy―hewasn'tyou.Formysake,please,letitgo.”Hegavemeaparting squeezethensetmedownontheground.

  “Alice,Jan,Becky:youthreereadytoheadout?”

  Theirlooksweremurderous,especiallyAlistair's,butitwasallfor show.Theywereexcitedtohaveanewhome,anewpack,andmaybe, oneday,anewfamily.Iknewwhatitwasliketofeelthatway.

  ThePCbrothershadslowlyfiledoutoverthecourseoftheevening, onceSeanrealizedthetriowasn'tathreattoanyonewithouttheirtags.

  PeytaandJayhesitatedforamomentatthedoor,undoubtedlynot wantingtohavetopartfromoneanother.Ronniewasn'tgoingtobe jazzedaboutJaysleepingoverwithoutthepresenceofdanger,andweall knewit.

  “Peyta,doyouguyswanttogotomyplace?”Iaskedthepining pixie.

  “Canwe?I'llcallmomandtellherI'llbecrashingwithyou.”

  “That'sfine.Goahead.”

  Thetwosmiledinunisonatmebeforeheadingoutthedoor together,stillhandinhand.AsIwatchedthemleave,Irealizedthat everyonewascrashingatmyhousebutme,anditmademefeelleftout.I lookedupatSeanwithtiredbutsaddenedeyes.Insteadofbeingmetwith theuncertain,closed-offlookIexpected,Igotoneofmyfavorites―the Cheshirecatsmile.

  “Youwanttostayatyourplace,don'tyou?”Hisquestionwasa formality;healreadyknewtheanswer.

  Inodded.

  “Iwanttogiveyousomethingfirst,”hesaid,reachingintotheneck ofhisshirttopulloutachain.Achainwithmyplatinumringdanglingat theend.“Itseemslikenowwouldbeagoodtimetoreturnthis.”

  “Myring...howlonghaveyouhadthis?”Iasked,wonderinghowI hadn'tnoticeditbefore.

  “I'vewornitsincethemomentIcouldretrieveitfromthefloorthe nightScarlettookyoufromme.Ifeltclosertoyouwithiton...”

  “ButyousaidthatyoueventuallythoughtIwantedtostaygone, likeIwantedtobeawayfromyou.”

  Heshruggedinresponse.

  “Theheartdoesnotalwaysmakesense,Ruby.Itwantswhatit wants,evenifwhatitdesiresdoesnotwantitback.Keepingthiswithme remindedmethatyouandIwillalwaysbeconnected―forbetteror worse.”

  Heunclaspedthechain,slidingtheringoffofittohandittome.I lookedatitmomentarilybeforetuckingitawaysafelyinmypocket.I hadonlyjustgottenScarletback.Ididnotwishtoseeifplacingthering onmyfingerwouldcageheronceagain.

  “Thankyou,”Iwhispered,avertingmygaze,“fornotgivingupon me.”

  “Myfearandmyegodrovemetobelievethatyouchosetoleave me.Icouldnotfindyou...myfailurewasmorethanIcouldbear,butmy heartneverbelievedyouwouldabandonme.Youaremine...”

  “Andyouaremine,”Icountered,aseductivesmileplayingacross
mylips.

  Itpulledthemostdelightfulrumblefromdeepwithinhischest,a possessivenoisethatmademylegsweakandmyheartrace.Hewould alwaysclaimmeashis.

  AndIwouldalwayslethim.

  “Let'sgothen.Iwanttomakesurenoneofthemcrashinyour room.Irefusetosleeponthefloor.”

  IcockedmyeyebrowathimandthrewasmuchsaucinessasIcould intomyvoice.“WhosaidI'mlettingyousleep?Inearlydiedtonight;I don'twanttosleep.Iwanttofeel alive.”Hiseyeswidenedanddarkened toalarminglevels.Itseemedhelikedmyplan.

  “Alive...,”hesaidsoftly,strokingthesideofmyface.“Let'skeep youthatway,shallwe?AndbesuretotellScarletthatsheandIwillstill behavingthatlittlechatsoon.Shehassomeexplainingtodo.”

  Andboydidsheever.Threeweekswasalongtimeforhertodoall sortsofhorrificthings,includingrackupabodycount.Ihopedshe'dbe forthcomingwiththefacts,butknowingher,thatwasatotalpipedream.

  She'dbeenasquietasamousesinceherreturn,andIcouldn'thelpbut feelthathersilencedidn'tbodewellforanyofus.

  “Shedoesindeed,”Iagreedbeforeturningthetablesonhim,“but sodoyou―likehowyouknewwhereIwas,orwhathadhappened?I knowyouknoweverything,Sean,butthatwasastretch,evenforyou.”

  “Ihadalittlehelp,”hereplied,guidingmeoutofhisapartment.

  “Help?”

  “Yes.I'dsaythatyour BoyScoutearnedhimselfanothermerit badgetonight.”

  “Matty?”Iblurtedout,utterlystunned.

  “I'minclinedtosaythatheandIareevennow,”hecontinuedwhile descendingthestairstothesecondfloor.“Hewastrailingyou.Hehas beenforawhile.Atthefirstsignofanambush,hewenttoPeytaand gaveadetaileddescriptionofwhereCooperhadtakenyou.The rest...well,youknowthatpart.”

  Ifeltanoverwhelmingsenseofgratitudeandguilt.Afterallthat hadhappened,Mattystillwantedtokeepmesafelikehealwayshad,and Iwasimmenselythankfulforthat.MyguiltwasinknowingthatIhadno ideahowtoreturnthefavor.