The Christmas Tree Guy

by Railyn Stone

  “I guess things aren’t as simple as they used to be when I was little,” Quinn remarked, smiling at the pig as his eyes and the sign he held stating ‘Let’s pig out’ lit up for a couple of seconds before both the sound effects and lights subsided.

  “No, they aren’t, but cookies and milk always help.” Janae winked and dipped her cookie in the glass of milk in front of her. “And don’t worry, it’s 2%,” she chirped.

  “Thanks,” he murmured.

  “I take it the interview went well?” Janae sat watching Quinn. She loved the ritualistic way he took the cookie apart just as he had from the time they started these little chats. Quinn was always able to talk to his mom about anything and it became their time to ‘chat.’ When he was a child, they sat at the table. Now that he was an adult, they sat on the barstools at the counter. His problems then seemed so much easier than the ones he was dealing with now. He’d agonized over his decision to even interview for the position. After Sydnee asked him to leave, he had been unable to focus on anything. He didn’t want to talk to anyone. He didn’t want to do anything. He wanted her back. His mother had finally convinced him to at least do the interview. If he didn’t get the job, then he would know where he stood and he could focus on possibly getting Sydnee back.

  “Extremely. They’re still interviewing others but, I feel really good about my chances.” He should be happy, but in all actuality, he wasn’t. Quinn knew this job would change his life forever, but the only thing he could focus on was Sydnee and how much he missed her.

  “Congratulations, honey, I’m so proud of you.” Janae reached over to squeeze his forearm, but seeing his grim countenance, she sat back. “You don’t look happy about it, though.”

  “It’s a once-in-a-lifetime offer, Mom.” He sat, staring at the counter repeatedly twisting the cookie apart and putting it back together.

  “Yes it is.”

  “In so many ways I feel like it’s my time to go, you know? That this is my chance to realize every dream I’ve ever had. Prove that I can do it.” He sat back with a heavy heart.

  “But?”

  “But, I can’t get her out of my head.” He looked up at Janae with the saddest eyes. The light that usually bounced around in his silvery spheres had diminished and left them lifeless and dull. “She’s all I have thought about since I left for the interview. She’s all I thought about there and she’s all I keep thinking about.”

  “Honey, I wish I could tell you what to do, but I can’t.” Quinn knew his mom was saying as little as possible so he could work the problem out on his own. So many times he knew she wanted to tell him what to do because it was the protective side of her that would come out and want to keep him from being hurt, but he knew she was always going to let him make his own decisions and his own mistakes in order for him to learn. “I want you to realize your dreams.”

  “I know Mom. I do too. I guess I just want too much.” He put the uneaten halves back together and placed the cookie on the counter. Propping his elbows on the counter, he lowered his head into his hands, running his fingers through his wavy spikes. Why did life have to be so complicated?

  “Oh, honey, I know this isn’t easy.” She said, rubbing his back. “You haven’t talked to Sydnee at all, have you?” She watched him shake his head silently. “So she doesn’t know you went to the interview?”

  “No. Not unless somebody told her that too,” Quinn sighed.

  “Sweetheart, I’m going to tell you something I hope you’ll keep with you for the rest of your life. No matter if you’re with Sydnee or some other woman that comes into your life, remember this. Women like to know things first. We hate to be the last to know and most importantly, we never want to be told something by a friend that it seems like everyone else already knows, that should have come from you first.”

  “You tell me this now?” Quinn frowned, picking the cookie up and plucking it apart again before he dunked the side with no cream in his glass of milk and popped it in his mouth.

  “Hey I’m a single mom, I’m trying to give you these things, but it’s a lot to cover by myself,” she grinned, squeezing his arm.

  “I know. I’m just so frustrated Mom. I care about Syd and the boys so much it hurts. I would never do anything to hurt them and I would protect them with everything I have. Why isn’t that enough for her mother? Why does she hate me just because I’m white?” He looked at his mother with eyes muddled with frustration and confusion and she breathed deeply.

  “Baby, I don’t know why people don’t give others a chance just because of their race.” She paused. “But something I think you need to think about is the fact you don’t know what Sydnee’s mother’s experiences have been. You don’t know what she has been through that’s caused her to feel the way she does.”

  Quinn sat for a moment thinking about what his mother said. It was true. He’d only talked to Sydnee about how her relationship with her mother was, but he’d never gotten a chance to really get to know Carroll at all. She hadn’t been too welcoming or forthcoming with him from the get-go. Sydnee had alluded to her mother’s experiences the night she broke it off with him, but she hadn’t gone into detail. His mother was right; he had no clue what Carroll had been through. He wished he had the opportunity to show her; he only wanted happiness and the best for Sydnee and the boys. “Yeah. I guess you’re right. I just wish it didn’t have to be that way. I wish people would accept people for who they are.”

  “I know, honey. I wish it was that way too, but unfortunately some just can’t get past the color of a person’s skin long enough to find out what’s in their heart. It goes both ways.”

  “I don’t have a clue what to do right now.” He was so overwhelmed with everything swirling in his head and he just wanted it all to stop.

  “Quinn, you’ll make the right choice. Don’t think about it from an outside point of view or what others would think of the decision you make. Do what makes you happy and make the choice you can live with for the rest of your life. I don’t want you to have any regrets, but I don’t want you to pass up a chance of a lifetime if you know years from now, you’ll kick yourself for not going.”

  “That’s the thing, Mom. I don’t know, and there’s no way to know it. Life is just this series of choices and you may take one and it leads you down one road to another choice and it just keeps going. And it’s kicking my ass.”

  Laughing at his last comment, Janae patted his arm. “Well, you don’t have to make a decision right now. Just think it all over and take your time. Remember, make a decision you can live with.”

  He nodded, knowing he had a lot to think about and to figure out. This was a decision that was going to affect the rest of his life and he needed to take his time with making his choice. “I will. Thanks for the talk, Mom.” Leaning over, he hugged her and kissed her on the side of her forehead before smiling. “I better go. I’ve got an early morning and I think I need to go run for a while to clear my head.”

  “It was good to see you, and remember the most important thing, I love you.” Janae stood, wrapping her arms around her son.

  “Love you too,” hugging her back, he turned and headed out the door.

  ###

  “Hey, sweet peas.” Sydnee watched the twins run into the house. Matt had picked them up from school and was dropping them off. Since Sydnee had a late meeting and Monica had other plans, Matt had offered to pick them up. She was hesitant at first, but Matt convinced her it would be another opportunity for him to spend time with his sons and really show them he was interested in being there for them.

  “Mommy, look at what I did,” Travis beamed, as he and Charlie both ran to her with pictures they’d drawn in class.

  “I did one too, Mommy,” Charlie added.

  “Wow, these look amazing.”

  “Yes, they are pretty interesting,” Matt added. The scowl plastered across his face let her know he wasn’t in too great of a mood. “You should ask them what their drawings are of.” She was a
little puzzled by what he meant as she took another look at the pictures. The assignment was to draw a picture of their family and Sydnee could see on both of the boys’ pictures they had drawn stick people to represent her, Leanne, Charles and them. She didn’t see anything strange about the pictures except on Charlie’s drawing, Matt did appear, but he was on one side of them, on the far end, and beside Sydnee stood another stick person, holding her hand.

  “Charlie, sweetheart, why don’t you tell me about your picture?” She knelt to look in the little boy’s eyes.

  “This is you and me and Travis and Grammie and Grandpa, and Daddy is right here beside Travis.”

  “Okay, honey, but who is this right here beside Mommy holding her hand? I see you and Travis over here,” she pointed to the twins on the picture.

  Looking at his mom and then glancing at Matt, Charlie moved closer to Sydnee and whispered in her ear, “Quinn.”

  A little taken aback by the response, Sydnee looked at Charlie and then at Matt and back at Charlie. “Oh,” she said softly. She knew Quinn had made an impact on her life but obviously he’d done the same with the boys. “Sweeties, it’s almost time for dinner, so why don’t you go wash up and put your backpacks in your room, okay?” she said and the twins ran to their room.

  “Interesting pictures, huh?” Matt asked, frowning.

  “It’s no big deal, Matt.” Standing up straight, she avoided Matt’s glare.

  “No big deal? Sydnee, if you didn’t notice, that white boy was on both of their pictures.” She could see Matt was visibly annoyed by the twins’ artwork.

  “Shhhh, keep your voice down, and his name is Quinn,” Sydnee said through clenched teeth, making sure the children were out of earshot.

  “They are putting him on family pictures they are drawing in school and you don’t have a problem with it?” She wanted to laugh at the whole situation. Here it was Matt never took one interest in the kids, but the minute they put someone else on their pictures, he was having a fit. If he only knew of all of the pictures they’d drawn that didn’t have him on there at all.

  “No, it’s not a problem. Look, Matt, they both got attached to Quinn and he was the first man I introduced them to after you left. Oh, why am I explaining anything to you?” She shook her head walking by him to the kitchen.

  “You’re explaining to me because I’m your husband,” Matt spat.

  “My EX-husband. Matt, get it through your thick skull you walked out on us, so you really don’t get to say much to me about who I have in my life.”

  “Sydnee, I don’t want that wh…I don’t want him thinking he can just take my place with my children,” Matt stopped himself from making reference to Quinn’s skin color when Sydnee glared at him.

  “No one is trying to take your place with the boys, Matt. Good grief, when will you stop worrying so much about that and just focus on being a father to them?” His priorities never did seem to line up the way they were supposed to and frankly she was tired of reminding him.

  “I wouldn’t have to worry if you weren’t dating him.”

  “Well, you’ll be happy to know I’m not dating him anymore,” Sydnee spouted, before she realized what she’d done.

  “Really? When did this happen?” She could see his demeanor change almost instantly and she kicked herself for even telling him they were no longer together.

  “Matt, it’s none of your business.” She turned to the sink to rinse off a few dishes to place them in the dishwasher.

  “I’m sorry things didn’t work out for you two.”

  “I’m just sure you’re sorry,” Sydnee murmured, rolling her eyes.

  “Hey, I knew he couldn’t handle you or give you what you need. I’m just glad you came to the realization. I can’t say I’m sad you two aren’t together anymore.” She stiffened, feeling him move to stand behind her. “Especially when I know you and I belong together,” he finished, pulling back her dark hair from her neck and kissing the soft skin below her ear. “You remember how good we were together,” he whispered against her lobe.

  Shuddering at the way his lips felt on her skin, Sydnee held onto the countertop feeling Matt pressing his body against hers, taking his hands and rubbing them up and down her arms.

  “Matt, stop,” she stammered, as her eyes flittered closed.

  “C’mon, Syd,” he whispered softly. “You know how good it can be. Don’t fight it.” His right hand found the edge of her blouse and started to inch underneath the material and his fingers splayed across the soft skin on her stomach. “This is what we both want.” He took her ear gently between his teeth and she felt his tongue flick her lobe.

  Sydnee could feel her willpower leaving as Matt continued to assault her ear and stroke her stomach, and she fought against all of the carnal feelings she was having before it led her down a path she didn’t want to revisit. Matt knew every hot button to push when it came to her. He moved his hands up to the buttons on the outside of her blouse and when she felt the top button come undone, she pushed away from him.

  “Matt, stop,” she turned, pressing her hands against his chest. “Stop.” She straightened her shirt and walked to the other side of the kitchen, rubbing her neck.

  “Oh, come on, Sydnee. You and I both know there’s still something there.” Matt took a few steps closer to her.

  “Stop,” she put her hand up to keep him from coming closer. “I want you to leave.”

  “Sydnee…look, maybe I came on a little strong, but baby, I still love you.”

  “Don’t, Matt. You’re with someone else now and I’ll be damned if I’m going to play the other woman. I don’t know why you’re doing this or why you came back, but this…you have to go.” Pointing to the door, she knew she needed him to leave. And to leave her alone. Her heart was racing and she just needed him to go. The only reason he’d gotten as far as he did was because of the loneliness she was feeling from missing Quinn.

  “You aren’t the other woman, Syd. You are the only woman.”

  “Whatever, Matt.”

  “Sydnee, as much as you want me to leave, I know you want me to stay. Baby, you and I belong together,” he reached out to her. She was not going to fall for his lines again.

  “Stop calling me that. I’m not your baby. Please, Matt, just go.” She was nearly in tears and all she wanted was for him to leave. Why was he here and doing this to her?

  “I do love you, Syd. And I know deep down, you still love me. You and I belong together and I’m going to make you see that, no matter what I have to do.” He started to back out of the kitchen and head to the door and she took a few steps in the same direction to make sure he kept going, avoiding any eye contact with him.

  “Matt, just leave.”

  “Okay, okay, I’ll go.” He stopped his retreat and she looked up to see him smiling at her. “But, Sydnee, just think about this, okay? Think about how we can build a relationship again and we can raise our boys…together. I know that’s what you want, and so do I,” he added, before heading out of the front door.

  CHAPTER 17

  “I’m glad you finally decided to come back to class,” Sara said, as she and Sydnee finished a spinning class. Sydnee had finally worked up the nerve to go back to the gym. She caught herself from time to time looking around to see if she could catch a glimpse of Quinn, but she never spotted him. It was just as well. She had no idea what she would say to him if she did.

  “Yes, I am too. However, I don’t think my thighs are happy right now.” She couldn’t believe how tight her muscles felt in her legs. They’d both finally decided to try a spinning class after much debate. Of course, now, both were feeling it.

  “I know. I think we should keep our old bodies in Pilates and let these young girls have those bikes. I can’t believe how bad that hurt,” Sara laughed, as they gathered their belongings from the lockers.

  “Remember, it was your idea,” Sydnee groaned, as she limped out of the gym. “I’ll talk to you later,” she added, as she and Sara
parted ways and headed in different directions in the parking lot towards their vehicles.

  “Yeah, I gotta go and rub in some Icy Hot. Good night.”

  Reaching into her bag for her keys, Sydnee laughed and continued to her SUV. Due to the distraction, she didn’t notice the figure leaning against her car and once she located them, she looked up with a start.

  “Uh, hi,” she uttered, locking eyes with a pair of familiar orbs. She could feel her heart flutter at the sight of Quinn leaning against her car. His all black tracksuit fit him to a tee. And she briefly thought back to the last time she’d been held in his powerful arms. She instantly wished she could be one of those women who look amazing after a workout. She didn’t look horrible, but just how good could you look after an hour on a bike, sweating bullets? Unconsciously, she straightened her lime green jacket.

  “Hi.” Quinn stood slowly, watching her. “You know, you shouldn’t be walking through the parking lot alone at this time of night.”

  “I know.” She looked down at the keys in her hands. She turned them over and over again before she looked up and continued. “I used to have a personal body guard that would escort me to my car when I would leave the gym at night, but I kind of did something stupid and pushed him away,” she finished quietly, finally unlocking the door and throwing her bag in.

  “Well, honestly, he couldn’t have been that great of a bodyguard if he let you push him away that easily.” She watched him shift his weight from one foot to another and she realized she wasn’t the only one that was nervous.