Hamish Macbeth 14 (1999) - Death of a Scriptwriter

by M C Beaton

  “Calls her his housekeeper,” said Ailsa.

  “Have you heard from Eileen Jessop?”

  Ailsa’s face darkened. “No, she just took off without a word to anyone. I thought she was my friend. All the village women believed thon lie you told Edie about Eileen sending her film to Hollywood. Of course, they know it’s a lot of rubbish now. They’re not wanted for any more crowd scenes, so they’re all a bit flat.”

  “Well, it’ll stop them throwing bricks at each other,” said Hamish heartlessly.

  But as he paid for his groceries and made his way home, he had to confess to feeling pretty flat himself.

  Eileen’s play had been kept a secret, and the women of Drim’ did not know about it until Holly Andrews ran around the village waving a newspaper. The advance reviews for The Witch of Drim were enthusiastic.

  “And she never even said a word to you,” Holly Andrews told Ailsa. “Well, I always said she was sly.”

  On the night of the first performance, the whole of Drim crowded round their television sets. Ailsa had invited Holly Andrews, Edie, and Alice to watch it with her. At first they cheered and laughed and hugged each other as they watched the show. But when it was over and Ailsa said, “Eileen really is brilliant,” Holly said, “Aye, and she’ll get a lot of money, and here’s us, who slaved our guts out for her, not even being invited to the press conference or getting a bit of money.”

  “That’s right,” said Edie, goggling at her. “She’d better not show herself here again.”

  Eileen’s play was shown on television in Scotland and then on national on the following Sunday, where it successfully took away a large chunk of the audience for The Case of the Rising Tides.

  Harry’s TV detective series got panned by the critics and suffered badly in comparison with Eileen’s play.

  “Do you know,” said Eileen as she and Sheila sat on the floor of Sheila’s flat, with newspapers spread all around them, “I’ve been so busy writing this new play and with all the fuss and excitement, I’ve never given a thought to poor Ailsa.”

  “Let’s drive up to Drim this weekend,” said Sheila. “I’d like to see Hamish Macbeth again. That poor man. The number of times I stood him up. I’ll phone him.”

  “Tell him not to tell anyone we’re coming,” said Eileen.

  “Are you worried about Colin?”

  “Not anymore. But I’d like to make our arrival in Drim a surprise.”

  Sheila phoned Hamish. “I feel the least I can do is buy you a meal,” she said. “If you’re fed up with me, I quite understand.”

  “No,” said Hamish. “But turn up this time. When?”

  “We’re driving up on Saturday. Saturday evening at the Napoli at eight?”

  “That’ll be grand. How does it feel to be successful?”

  “Great.”

  “Harry Frame must be furious with you.”

  “He tried to offer me a job. Can you believe it? I had great pleasure in telling him to get lost. See you Saturday. Oh, and we want to surprise them in Drim, so don’t tell anyone.”

  It was odd to be approaching Drim again, thought Eileen, blinking out at familiar landmarks through her new contact lenses. Sheila drove down the winding road that led down to Drim, then parked outside the general store.

  “Well, here we are,” said Sheila as she and Eileen stepped out of the car.

  “This looks like a welcoming committee,” laughed Eileen. The women of Drim were coming down from their cottages towards them. Ailsa came out of the shop and stood with her arms folded, her face grim.

  “Ailsa!” cried Eileen, making to run towards her.

  “Keep your distance,” shouted Ailsa.

  “There’s something badly wrong here,” said Sheila nervously, watching the women get closer.

  Then Holly Andrews, who was at the head of the group, stood and yanked up a clod of grass and earth and hurled it straight at them.

  “Bitch!” shouted Holly. “You made money out o’ us! Bitch!”

  A wind raced down the loch, whipping Eileen’s skirts about her legs. Crows dived and screamed overhead.

  “Get in the car,” shouted Sheila, her face white.

  They drove off as stones rattled against the sides of the car.

  “Where to?” panted Eileen.

  “Back to Glasgow,” said Sheila. “I’m never coming here again.”

  Willie Lamont leaned against Hamish’s table in the restaurant that evening and said, “Stood up again?”

  “It looks like that,” said Hamish gloomily.

  “It’s your reputation for philately that puts the women off.”

  “I suppose you mean philandering, Willie. Who am I supposed to be philandering with? You?”

  “No need to get so shirty,” said Willie, backing off.

  This is my life, thought Hamish, sitting in a restaurant waiting for some woman who can’t even be bothered to turn up.

  Jimmy Anderson walked in.

  “I’ve been looking for you,” he said. “Patricia Martyn-Broyd’s just topped herself.”

  “How did she do it?”

  “Hanged herself on a bit o’ sheet. Well, less money for the taxpayer to bother about. You on your own, Hamish?”

  “Yes.”

  “Good, I’m right hungry. There’s nothing like a plate o’ spaghetti washed down wi’ a glass o’ Scotch.”

  Jimmy sat down and shook out his napkin. “Sure you weren’t waiting for anyone, were you?”

  “As a matter of fact, I’ve been stood up.”

  “That’s the women for ye,” said Jimmy. “And do ye know the answer, Hamish?”

  “No.”

  “Get drunk!”

  §

  THE END