Forever Girl

by Sam Destiny

  She teased the top of his hard-on, circled the tip of her tongue around it before drawing him back between her lips, licking up the underside of him, almost painfully slow, and he couldn’t help himself, thrusting into her mouth before he’d even consciously decided for it.

  She stopped him from further movement by grabbing the base of his dick, squeezing tightly once, letting him know who was in control.

  Shit, she’d probably make him come before he even got a chance to enjoy the feeling of her.

  “Tess… Tessa… beautiful, please, just slow… argh!” He groaned in pleasure as he felt her teeth grazing the sensitive skin. She knew very well what she was doing to him, and he threw his head back, trying to think rather unappealing thoughts to calm himself down, to make himself last longer.

  He felt her moving, but his mind couldn’t fill in the blank of what she was doing until she was slipping onto his lap, wrapping her arms around his shoulders.

  “Didn’t think I’d finish you off like that when I explicitly stated I need you inside of me, did you?” she asked against his lips and he swallowed once, twice, before actually managing to even think about formulating an answer. She’d kicked off her panties and now was hovering over his erection, just barely brushing him to let him feel her wetness. God, he wanted to sink into her, but she was teasing him.

  “Cat got your tongue?” she snickered and he grabbed her hips, guiding her where he needed her before pushing into her with one long stroke. They both quivered and he felt her hold on him tightened. She didn’t protest and therefore he figured she was still on the pill. Or again. Or whatever.

  “Can’t move or… It’ll be over before it started,” he grunted out, meaning every word of it.

  “Then better hold on tightly, soldier,” Tessa gave back, starting to circle her hips in a way that sucked him in deeper, sending jolts into his dick with every movement. Hell, he wanted to hold on longer, wanted to last until the sun kissed the night goodbye, but that would be impossible.

  “Beautiful, honestly,” he gritted out, but instead of slowing down of even stopping, she placed her palms against his shoulders, using him to hold onto while she started riding him in earnest, gliding up and down, grinding herself against his body until he felt the need to come in every last nerve of his body. His shoulders tensed with need, his fingers dug into her hips, but he still let her chase her own release. Her breasts were crushed between them and he knew there was hardly a way two people could be closer, yet he wrapped his hands finally around her and pulled her in, crushing his lips to hers in a tangle of teeth, lips, and tongues.

  “Tess…” It was all the warning he could give her before resting his forehead on her shoulder and spilling inside of her, feeling how she followed suit, clenching around him while shivering under his hands.

  He wanted to say something when noise penetrated the sated haze he found himself in.

  Tessa started to giggle and he huffed out a breath.

  “At least he let daddy finish,” she laughed, kissing his nose.

  “Very funny,” he growled, gently placing her back on the bed before getting up to get a wet cloth to clean her up. Back in the bathroom he rid himself of the sticky mess he’d made before pulling on sweats, not caring that he was going commando beneath them.

  “I’ll get it,” he promised as he found Tessa at the edge of the bed, reaching for a shirt. She’d turned on the night lamp and was beautiful in the soft warm glow, her cheeks rosy from their late night activities.

  Her forehead scrunched up. “You’re sure?” she wanted to know and he nodded.

  “Fine, I’m just gonna go down and prepare a bottle. I wouldn’t be surprised if he was hungry. You know, he might need a diaper change,” she explained, clearly scanning his face for a reaction. He just rolled a shoulder, giving her a grin.

  Sure, it wasn’t the most pleasant task he could think of, but he was a dad and that was what dads did.

  She stood, pulling over his shirt, and nodded. “Okay.” He saw the smirk on her lips and leaned in to kiss it off, then he went into Kris’ room that currently served as nursery.

  “Hey buddy,” he greeted his crying son, and to his surprise the baby silenced immediately, as if trying to figure out who was talking. Jazz lifted him out of the crib, as always surprised how small his son was, and walked over to the dresser serving as changing table.

  “We can do that, right? You’re not gonna pee on me, will you? Not that I’d hate you for it or anything, but I’d just like to avoid it. We can do that, right? You love daddy, you don’t wanna pee on him. Reserve that for someone else, please?”

  He tickled his son’s stomach, something that always seemed to make him gurgle, and he took it as a sign that John agreed.

  Luckily the diaper wasn’t full, but his son got active the moment he was practically naked, kicking his little legs and stretching his tiny hands toward Jazz. His heart melted and he let John hold onto his index fingers, being in awe about how small everything on his was.

  “We should probably dress you before mommy comes and sees that you’re naked. You cannot be naked unless it’s in the shower or a bathtub, or with a girl, but that you better only start after turning twenty-one. You got me? Your mother won’t like it much before then. I have a feeling she’s like a lioness, and you’re her cub after all. She’ll always protect you, and so will I, but I’m not gonna dislike all your girls. Just the stupid ones, okay? You need a smart woman. Listen to super daddy, he knows best.”

  Jazz grabbed a diaper, put it under his son, closed it over the tiny body, then pushing him back into his onesie.

  “We did it. Look at us rocking this shit,” Jazz announced happily before picking up his gurgling son. It was warm in Kris’ room, probably too warm to sleep in, but at least his son wouldn’t be freezing. Once he turned he found Tessa leaning against the doorframe, her expression soft and yet unreadable.

  “Want me to feed him?” she wanted to know, but Jazz shook his head.

  “I got it,” he assured her and she handed him the bottle. “Go back to bed. I’ll join you as soon as John is asleep,” he then urged and she watched him for a moment before grinning.

  “Fine, super daddy. I’ll be waiting.”

  He groaned while she left the room, her laughter echoing back to him, making him smile.

  It was barely twenty minutes later that Jazz slipped under the covers with her, still wearing the sweatpants, but she didn’t mind. If she felt up to another round, she wouldn’t mind peeling the clothes off him slowly, teasing and tasting him all the way down.

  But before she’d even allow herself to think about that, she needed to know what he’d been dreaming about.

  She’d left on the lamp, and so had he.She rested her chin on the back of her hand on his chest.

  “Tell me about the nightmare,” she demanded and felt how his chest lifted with an uneasy breath.

  “Do I have to?” he wanted to know and she nodded, knowing he felt it even though his eyes now were turned to the ceiling.

  “It wasn’t even a real memory,” he began after what seemed to be an eternity. “It was just faces flashing before my eyes, of all the people I saw die. One is most prominent. He was the first to get killed by a grenade. Caleb. We’d just left the vehicles, deciding that it was safest if we hid somewhere, especially because gunshots had started to hit the jeep up front. There was one before us, and one came after us, then two more joined later. Maybe they had been alerted.” She remembered Ryan telling her that the details might be hazy.

  He shifted and Tessa let him until he was resting against the headrest.He pulled her up until she sat on his thighs. He had one hand on her hip while the other cupped the side of her face. She leaned into his palm and he watched her lips while continuing. “Caleb was right next to me. Like directly next to me, stumbling because fuck, running in sand is hard.And the next thing I know is sand explodes around us and half of his face his bloody. I go back for him, pull him up when his body spasms
and I look at him. His eyes are wide and he gasps. I…”

  “Jazz,” Tessa whispered, kissing his lips briefly. His eyes were unfocused, telling her he was going back into the memory, and as much as she wanted to hear it, she needed to keep him with her.

  “Jesse. Hey, super daddy,” she tried again and finally he shook his head, grabbing her shoulders before drawing her in for a harsh kiss, then his lips turned soft, melting her insides to goo. He was back.

  “I’m sorry. He was hit by a gun shot.” Jazz started to brush his fingers through her hair, following the movement with his gaze.

  “First one to die, beginning your trauma. Who else did you see?”

  “Betty, and a couple of others. I don’t know. I don’t think I saw anyone else actively the moment they died. I mean, I saw them dead, touched enough of them to check for their pulses just to make sure, but seeing them die? I think that happened with Caleb only.”

  Jazz was shivering and Tessa wondered if he even realized it, but she simply leaned in, covering his body with hers. She felt him kiss the side of her head, then he started drawing lazy circles on her back, holding her gently.

  “I’m sorry. I cannot imagine how that must’ve been,” she admitted.

  “I wouldn’t want you to. It changes people, and you’re perfect just the way you are. It’s weird. When telling you it’s easier. It’s ugly, and it burns, and the memories lurk, but… telling you works a lot better than telling Will. We usually talk about you, because you keep me grounded. Where there are triggers on every corner, you are my anchor, if you’re there or not. That day at the airport? Damn, Tessa, I think that was the day you saved me the first time, and you never stopped again. Thank you.”His voice was quiet, serious, and yet full of warmth. She pressed her palm above his heart, feeling the steady, if quickened, beat, and sighed.

  “You think you’re ready for a few more hours of sleep?” she asked and he nodded.

  “If sleep is what you want,” he gave back, winking, and although she was tempted to give in and let him seduce her, she still recalled the bags under his eyes vividly, and having seen the start of his nightmare, she could well imagine how the last weeks had been.

  Opting for his wellbeing, she moved off his lap and cuddled under the blankets again, holding them open, inviting him to hug and hold her.

  “Not tonight, soldier. We still have a day left to do what pleases us, so let’s get some sleep. Especially because John won’t be generous with that in the morning,” she grinned and Jazz groaned, laying down next to her while drawing her into his arms.

  “Fine,” he conceded. “But just because then I’ll seduce you in the kitchen when he’s doing his nap,” he promised, his voice like melted chocolate.

  “We’ll see about that.” She kissed his chest, smiling to herself. If it were for her, he’d be able to seduce her whenever and wherever, as long as he kept up being honest with her.

  Their Sunday plans were shot when Johnny woke up and didn’t stop crying. Eventually Tessa had opted for bundling him up and putting him into his car seat, just to take him with her to the apothecary, getting something against stomachaches. She hoped he’d fall asleep in the car, which seemed to be a common thing, and although Jazz had been insistent in joining her, she had told him to get lunch started because she’d be starving once she was back.

  As it was, Jazz had decided for a run instead. Tessa had a key and would be getting back in, but since he was awake and healthy enough for the first time in weeks, he wanted to try to get forty-five minutes in at least, sweating his anger and worries out.

  He didn’t come far, facing a flashback the moment he pulled open the front door. There was a soldier there, in uniform, the green one he was so used to and yet hadn’t worn in months, but that wasn’t what gave Jazz a blow to the stomach. No, it was a real fist, knocking him back as if he was feather-light.

  “Corporal Connor,” the ghost snarled.The flashback that had come to life. It had to be a weird sort of flashback, or maybe memory, or whatever, because it simply was not possible.

  Jesse backed up until his feet hit something, and he realized he’d walked straight into the sofa.

  “Caleb,” he stuttered, his eyes roaming over the guy. The left side of his comrade’s face consisted of nothing more than scars and scar tissue overgrowing other parts. Places where, as Jesse recalled, holes had gaped. “Impossible,” he gritted out, his heart racing in his chest so hard, he worried it would simply stop at some point.

  “Because you left me there, ready to let me die? After making sure we all had to stay right there, in that spot in the middle of the desert, being attacked and slaughtered like pigs?”

  Anger seeped from Caleb’s voice and it was then that Jazz realized this was reality.

  Caleb had survived.

  Lunging forward without conscious thought, he wanted to hug his comrade despite his obvious hatred, but he didn’t come that far as his legs were kicked out from under him. He hit the hardwood floor, his head snapping down onto the surface, making pain explode in his skull.

  The next thing he knew was how Caleb hovered over him, pressing his thumbs into Jazz’s throat until he could neither breathe nor speak, black spots dancing in his vision.

  “Caleb,” he croaked, but the other guy just intensified the pressure before suddenly breaking away.

  “Killing you right now would be letting you off easy. This was all your fault. All those lives lost… and you’re here, back home, in a nice fucking house, ready to what? Jog? As if nothing ever happened!”

  He was still pinned to the ground, but as Jazz tried to move, tried to free himself, Caleb punched his ribs until Jazz could only gasp. “All your fault, fucker. Have you already forgotten the damn desert heat? Can you imagine how scolding it had been on the open wounds in my face? Of course, all feeling bled away when I was shot between the shoulder blades. Missed my spine by less than an inch, hitting soft tissue, but making me bleed like a motherfucker. I soaked the sand in my blood, and you didn’t even carry me to a safer place. You were so focused on yourself, you just left me there to die. Would’ve been the best for you, huh? Having everyone die who had counted on you. Had believed in you to fix up all the cars.” Caleb laughed manically. “We were all so wrong. You’re a traitor, aren’t you?”

  Breathing around the pain in his ribs and the agony radiating from his neck, Jazz struggled to sit up, only to get knocked back with a fist to his jaw, snapping his head around until he was sure his neck had cracked.

  Giving up the fight, he stilled, staring at the ceiling, willing Tessa’s image to invade his senses to lessen the pain.

  “I’m going to kill you, Jesse Connor. Slowly, painfully, for everything you did to my unit, to me. I’ll be forever broken and disfigured while you are as pretty and good as ever. What, got nothing to say in your defense? Or do you finally admit it was your fault, huh?”

  A knee dug into his abdomen, pushing until Jazz felt like throwing up.

  “Speak, you damn traitor!”

  “I’m sorry,” he rasped out, fire accompanying his every word. “I’m so sorry. I thought I had checked… all cars… were fine… all of them. Sorry… never meant…” He didn’t say more because it hurt too much and there was nothing else to say.

  “You don’t deserve to live, you fucking scumbag,” Caleb growled, getting to his feet. “I’m going to kill you. Not today, but I will, and you can run as far as you want, Connor, I’ll find you. I’ll always find you. You’ll be going down. Maybe I should start with cutting up your pretty face so no woman ever looks at you again. What would your Tessa say, huh?”

  Tessa…

  Her name was the one thing jolting Jazz out of his lethargy. She’d be back soon, and as long as Caleb was here, she was in danger. He pushed to his knees and hands, bracing himself for all the pain he’d feel the moment he’d get to his feet, but didn’t even get that far. Caleb gave him a swift kick to the stomach and Jazz almost buckled under the pain, but pushed through. H
e needed to protect the only woman he’d ever love.

  Surprising Caleb by grabbing his ankle and pulling strongly, they soon were both on the ground, fists flying, skin breaking with the impact. Jazz no longer knew which part of his body was hurting the worst, and it didn’t matter, because he needed to knock Caleb out long enough to keep Tessa safe. It was all that mattered.

  Only in the end it wasn’t Caleb who was silenced, because somehow, through one recklessness or the other, with one unexpected move, Caleb was back on top of him, pressing his thumbs where they’d been right in the beginning, and the last thing Jazz saw was the hatred in the other man’s eyes, paired with the guarantee that this time around Caleb wouldn’t let go to let him suffer just a little bit longer.

  Tessa was only allowed inside the house after the police had cleared it. It didn’t matter that she was crying her eyes out in front of the doors, or that she begged someone to tell her Jazz was okay.

  “Miss, we need to defuse the situation, and that won’t work with you in there,” a police officer told her for the millionth time, and although he’d introduced himself, Tessa had already forgotten his name. He was round, had greasy blond hair matted to his head, and watery green eyes that seemed tiny in his huge face. In her mind he more seemed to be on the other side of the law than the one he actually represented.

  “Tessa!”

  The voice cut through her worry and she turned around, finding Ryan jumping out of a black jeep.

  “What in the world are you doing here?” she wanted to know.

  He was in his doctor’s clothes, his coat billowing after him while he crossed the distance between them in a hurry.

  “I needed to know Corporal Connor was okay. Betty said something alarming back at the hospital, and I… I’m too late.” The realization seemed to cut deep because his face fell and his shoulders slumped. “Fuck!”