When Angels Cry

by Melanie Nilles

  Even after shoving the pile of feathers in the plastic bag, the kitchen bin was deep enough that there was room for more stuff. She didn't need her old clothes anymore and tossed them on top. They weighed down the feathers into almost nothing, and hid them from sight. It would have to suffice.

  Now what? The house was quiet, peaceful.

  She wandered through the rooms, glad for the chance to explore without him looking over her shoulder. Scott had apologized for his lack of decorating sense, but she appreciated the simplicity. In many ways it reminded her of home. Inari had art but they didn't bury themselves in useless clutter.

  She liked this house, and it wasn't much larger than a home needed to be. She would be comfortable for a couple months.

  Scott had already helped her more than she expected from any human. If she could repay him, she would. In the meantime, she needed to learn as much about that world as she could, and the television seemed to be the best means without venturing out and getting lost again.

  Padina sat down with the remote control on the sofa, a controller far more complicated than the three-button remote in the hospital, one of which was to call the nurse. He'd explained his remote control to her, but she'd also watched him using it. If she had it right…

  There. The television blinked on with the cable box. Not as easy as the holographic newsfeeds at home, but far from complicated.

  She switched through a few channels until something strange caught her attention. The creatures couldn't be real—a blue fuzzy monster with no feet and eyes that didn't move with any sense of realism. A puppet? This one was far from the simple toys of children, yet it interacted with children. Odd but intriguing.

  The blue monster's speech patterns were simple, much like her grasp of English, even simpler than the children's, who giggled. An entertainment for children? No. It was more. Symbols appeared on the screen and the kids made sounds while pointing at each. She'd seen those symbols. They were on the forms Scott had read to her at the hospital. It was the language.

  She set the remote beside her and focused on the program. Here was something to help her learn at a basic level. And if she had to stay longer than expected, it reassured her that her child would have the same tools available for learning.

  If the Shirukan didn't find her first.

  No. No more. Focus on learning. She didn't want to feel the emptiness of Jerantis's death left inside her, nor the fear of uncertainty.

  Too late; the tears choked her on the vivid memories. The show blurred into the background in and out as if blinking on and off through the flashes of memory she wanted to forget but hold onto. She would see it clearly the rest of her life, whether she wanted to or not; the Starfire in her recorded every memory in perfect detail, a bane and a blessing.

  If only she could turn it off like the television.

  * * *

  Finally, home after a long day. Scott shut the car door and walked up to the house as comments from throughout the day circled in his head, pecking at his doubts.

  Everyone had been sure to warn him about being used, because he was still so young and naïve. Naïve nothing. He'd been out of school a few years already and had seen enough to proceed with caution, but Padina was different. She seemed sincere in her situation, and most people he encountered were sincere.

  Still, Scott stared at the front door, afraid of what he might find, and adjusted the plastic grocery bag in his hand.

  Was she still there? Would his house be vandalized or robbed? Maybe he shouldn't have trusted Padina alone. Although he tried to convince himself otherwise, it had worried him all day, distracting him from his job. That had only made him more anxious for the day to end. He'd been tempted to call, but figured she probably wouldn't answer the phone, so why bother.

  God, he was crazy. A pretty face and a hard-luck story was all it took.

  On the stoop outside his door, Scott swallowed. Here went everything. He turned the key in the lock and held his breath until the door opened.

  Only the steady ticking of the clock on the mantle over the entertainment center broke the silence. His family pictures on the entertainment center were undisturbed. All the electronics were there. So far, so good.

  He closed the door and kicked off his shoes and headed for the archway into the kitchen, where he set down the bag of groceries on the countertop.

  Nothing. Okay, so where was Padina?

  He retreated from the kitchen and walked down the hallway past the dark bathroom to the bedrooms across from each other at the end. Through the crack of the guest door, he saw her lying down on the bed, her eyes shut.

  Relief poured through him. She'd stayed. His house was in order. Nothing to worry about. Kat owed him five bucks.

  Scott knocked on the door lightly, but she didn't wake.

  Must've been a rough day. Anyone else he would have teased. For her, it probably had been rough, at least emotionally.

  This probably wasn't a good time to disturb her. She'd wake up when she was ready. He pulled the door almost closed again and retreated to the living room, where he hung up his coat in the closet.

  And since she obviously wasn't cooking dinner, that would be his job also. Like he wasn't used to it. Living alone had forced him to learn a few things, or at least how to heat things. Spaghetti was easy.

  After putting away most of the groceries, he boiled water in one pot and dumped a jar of sauce in another.

  In the midst of throwing away the jar, he stopped and stared in the garbage. Why had she thrown her clothes away?

  Scott lifted out the fine blue cloth, which flowed like satin over his fingers. Unlike the satin of his high school prom date's dress, it didn't fray where it had torn.

  Something underneath made him hesitate. Feathers? Where'd those come from? A pile of them hid beneath her clothes.

  Scott lifted out a bent brown feather with white flecks. What kind of bird did that come from? And the garbage was full of them. What happened that day?

  Dear God. A knot tied up his insides at imagining a whole new scenario of what might have happened.

  "Paddy!" He left the cabinet open and the clothes out and rushed back to the bedroom, the feather still in his fingers. "Paddy?"

  He shoved the bedroom door open. "Paddy." When she didn't respond, he sat down on the bed and nudged her shoulder. "Paddy, wake up."

  She stretched and inhaled deeply. Her eyes opened and focused on the feather.

  "Did something happen today?"

  She stared wide-eyed, as if afraid of the feather, but snatched it from his hand and sat up.

  "Where'd all the feathers come from? Did the neighbor's dog attack a bird?" The husband hunted with the spaniel. It wouldn't surprise Scott if the dog had attacked a bird, even if he was well trained. And if she felt sorry for anything attacked by a dog after her ordeal… He didn't want to imagine what trauma that might have caused. "Are you all right? What happened to the bird?"

  "Bird?"

  "Yeah. You know—feathers, wings, beak? Bird."

  She shook her head, her brows pinched in confusion. She must have known what birds were, unless she'd never heard the word before.

  "Birds. Here." He stood up and offered his hand. Maybe a picture would clear up the lack of English vocabulary.

  Her fingers with the aquamarine vines twining around them grasped his for leverage as she slid her legs over the bed. Where the sweat pants pulled up past her calves, it exposed faint marks on the injured leg and no bandage. He stared at the leg. "You changed the bandage?"

  She looked down a moment and let go of his hand to pull the pant leg down. "Yes. Healing."

  "That's good." And fast, apparently nothing to worry about, except to take her to the clinic for her regimen of shots, just in case.

  He led her from the hallway to the stairs and down. From the built-in bookshelf in the basement, he pulled out the "B" volume of the encyclopedia set his grandma had bought him for high school graduation…Had it already been eight years?
They might be dated, but they could still be useful.

  Her eyes widened when he opened the volume to the section about birds. She listened to him read, her eyes never leaving the page, or the picture accompanying the article. After finishing two pages, he closed the book.

  Padina's good hand gripped his, stopping him from lifting the book back on the shelf. "No. Know more."

  What?

  "Read more…Teach…me."

  "Read the encyclopedia?"

  She nodded.

  "You must be joking."

  She shook her head and took the book from him with the care of it being a priceless treasure. "Want to learn."

  Oh, no. What had he started? He never wanted to read the whole set cover to cover. "How about a little more, after supper?"

  "Yes." Her eyes sparkled with an enthusiasm that brightened her whole countenance, but the reason behind it wasn't what he wanted. Yet, if it helped her, it might be worth doing, no matter how dull and boring.

  She held the book close to her chest going upstairs and left it on the sofa.

  It hadn't answered his question about a bird, but it did cheer her up, and that was worth something.

  After dinner, Scott asked again about what happened with the feathers, but she shook her head and looked away.

  He supposed she didn't have the vocabulary to explain it and gave up in frustration; but there was something about the way she'd looked at that feather in his hand that left him wondering if he should be speaking with his neighbor about the dog.

  He wouldn't bother Padina. After all she'd been through and the lingering treatments for rabies, she didn't need any fresh reminders of what she suffered.

  Instead, he grabbed the encyclopedia, starting with the first, and sat down on the sofa to read about aardvarks and airplanes, another subject she took an interest in and one close to his heart—he always wanted to learn to fly but never had the money. One day, he promised himself.

  For now, he had a visitor to teach, and the call back to Debbie could wait until later. He hated shopping. Looking for women's clothing with a hot woman to imagine it coming off might be every man's dream, but it wasn't his idea of fun.

  5

  Taren stared at the mini scanner on the table, useless as it was. Without the link to the island or city scanners, he was limited in range. Humans wouldn't likely have the technology to help him.

  The morning after his arrival, he'd wandered the city, tired and hungry, until he saw a place where the humans ate. There he'd found food. Although not exactly appetizing, it had been edible. The woman who served him took some of the money, confirming his suspicions—the humans substituted currency for valuables in trade for services and goods. He'd need more if he hoped to continue surviving on that world, and the thugs in the dark street had shown him the simple way to find it.

  He also needed shelter. The nights were chilly, unlike home. Someone had guided him to a hotel, but that cost money too. Now he understood its importance.

  But if he needed it to get by, so would the Crystal Keeper. What would she do?

  He had to find her, but only at night could he risk flying, and then he'd have to stay relatively low and sweep the area. Worse, she could move and stay out of range or out of sight. His task would be difficult, but he would find her.

  What if she escaped again? How would he find her a second time? The scanner power was limited. In a year of heavy use, the power cell would dwindle to nothing. He didn't have a backup.

  He'd have no way to track her then, unless humans developed a means to scan for the Starfire radiation. That wasn't likely, and he wasn't going to share his with them, or give them a reason to find her for themselves. The Starfire belonged on Inar'Ahben in the control of the empire.

  Something writhed in his thoughts just out of reach, an idea not fully formed. While he stared at the scanner, it slithered to the forefront and exploded.

  A tracking chip. That was the answer, except for one problem. The only chip he had was the one implanted in all Shirukan. Normally switched off, it could be turned on if they were lost and needed rescue. It emitted a low-frequency beacon that carried over long distances. Without it, he could never be found.

  But it might also be the only way of tracking the Crystal Keeper if she escaped him again. Hopefully, she wouldn't, but it would give him an easy means of finding her quickly.

  The hardest part would be digging it out from the back of his neck.

  * * *

  Padina stepped out of the car and turned her face to catch the warm sun, her heart aching to fly before entering the house. But she couldn't. Scott might mean well, but she didn't trust telling him, particularly after his reaction to the feathers in the garbage last night. If she knew him better, maybe she would, but she had to be sure of trusting who she told. Some humans would rather attack her kind, as they had some of the Inari missions to Earth in the past. Others had honored them, but they could turn too.

  Based on what she'd seen on their news programs, the government for which he worked was skeptical of any outsiders, even their own kind. She had to know, without a doubt, that he would keep her secret safe before she revealed anything to him.

  "Sorry about this." The car door thumped. "Debbie's car needs better timing when it wants to break down. Or she could just buy a new one."

  She closed her door as he joined her with several bags of clothes bearing different store logos.

  She took a couple of the bags from his arms. He'd looked uncomfortable in the stores, and let the women help her, which was only appropriate while she was undressed in a small room. At home, a scanner would have determined her size and picked the appropriate fit. Humans wasted time shopping for the right sizes. One day they'd advance far enough to make life easier, but for now she was stuck with doing things the hard way.

  They carried the bags into the house, where she felt secure that the Shirukan wouldn't find her. Luckily, he hadn't appeared in the store; but sooner or later, he was bound to find her.

  After setting the bags in her room, she followed Scott to the living room, where he fell on the sofa with a sigh. "No offense, but I hate shopping."

  So did she; it was extremely inefficient, taking up time she could have used learning more about that world.

  Padina sat down at the other end of the sofa, watching him as he clicked on the television. All during the day, the need to know grew stronger. Every moment they were out, she expected the Shirukan to show up, which made it imperative to ask Scott if he knew anything. Now, they were alone and not doing anything.

  After a few seconds, he turned to her, furrows grooved into his forehead. "Something wrong?"

  "You helping…aliens?" She had noticed that word used to refer to offworlders in their entertainment, but those were fictional creatures. But she also heard the word used in their news about people from other countries, which she could use to her advantage, especially since he thought she was a human from a different part of their world.

  "Yeah. It's my job." His smile smoothed away the creases, giving his face a gentle appearance that put her more at ease than his words. "Not like this. I mean, your situation is a little different. I've never invited anyone to stay before, but I couldn't let you live on the street."

  "Thank you…Being…" Wasn't there a better way to say it? She had to know. "Helping others like me? You…meeting others?"

  "Like you? No, but I'm not authorized to discuss specifics with just anyone. Sorry…Do you know someone from Laranta who might be here?"

  "No. Not Laranta, but being…hmm…not good."

  He sat up straighter and turned to face her. "Not good? You? You're good."

  Warmth rose to her cheeks, but that wasn't what she meant. "Man not good."

  Scott pushed his glasses up his nose. "Man not good? What man?"

  He clicked off the television and sat up more attentively. "Paddy, is there something you haven't told me? Is someone after you? Were you brought to this country as a slave, a…a sex slave
?" He winced at the last words.

  Sex slave? That couldn't have translated right. She brushed her hair away from her face, uncertain how to explain. "I…not that but…man chasing to finding me to…taking me." Tears burned her eyes. "I want to staying. Not going with."

  "No. No one will take you away. I won't let that happen."

  She welcomed his hands on her arms. It wasn't Jerantis, but the gentle touch invited her close. Jerantis…He should have stayed with her.

  Her heart ached to share his touch. Sobs trembled through her, and she buried her face in Scott's shoulder. As long as she stayed there, she was probably safe from the Shirukan finding her, but she couldn’t stay there all the time. She had to be out. She needed to fly again. Being stranded on the ground went against everything she was.

  But she couldn't risk exposing herself to anyone, least of all the Shirukan who had followed her. Nor could she risk endangering Scott if the Shirukan discovered him helping her.

  "It's all right. No one's taking you away. We can tell the police." His arms tightened around her, squeezing out the fear and grief knotted in her throat but reminding her of Jerantis, and his soft voice touched her with its sincerity. "I won't let anyone take you. I promise."

  She believed him, or wanted to, but no single human could stop the soldiers of the Shirat Empire.

  "It's okay, Paddy." His hand rubbed her back as if smoothing away the sharpness of the emotions, the way Jerantis had when she received news of her mother's death, except this was a stranger consoling her after the death of Jerantis. She needed it from someone.

  Padina sat back and wiped her eyes, relieved by his hand on her shoulder. "Thank you."

  "Can you tell me who's after you? Do you know why?"

  "Not knowing name. Bad man…killing us." Not long after Shirat Marin had declared her rule, Keepers started disappearing in the city of Naviketan. It didn't take long for rumors to circulate that the Shirukan were silently assassinating Keepers. A year later, Marin overtook a second city and decreed that Keepers were enemies of pure Inari. She conveniently ignored the fact that her precious Shirukan were also not pure Inari.