by Marchman, AC
“Oh, we have loads to discuss, Donovan Callahan.” Her tone is oozing with disgust and hatred. What the hell did I do to her? “You have an obligation to think about.”
Obligation? What obligation is she talking about? I strain to hear more, but instead I hear high heeled footsteps and the door closing quietly. I hear a heavy sigh and realize he’s coming to the bathroom.
Oh crap!
I rush back to the vanity to turn the hair dryer on. He opens the door and gives my a tight smile. “Is something wrong?” I ask over the whir of the dryer. Is he going to tell me or not? I don’t want him to know I was spying on them.
“Huh? Oh yeah, Donna came in here. She wanted to make sure I had my tux for tomorrow.”
I stare blankly at him. All that fuss over a tux, and it’s not even for her wedding? That’s doesn’t make any sense.
“She wants everything to be perfect. She’s kinda anal retentive and doesn’t want me to screw up anything.” He goes to turn the shower back on. “I’m sorry I missed you.” He winks at me, making me blush.
“I missed you, too.” When he puts the conversation with Donna like that, it makes a little more sense. But I’m still confused why she didn’t want me here this weekend and what they needed to talk about. I wonder if I should ask, or wait for him to tell me? At this point, I’m exhausted and I’m ready for bed. I watch Donovan’s gloriously naked body step into the shower, then I walk back into the room cautiously. I don’t want the daughter of Satan to come in and snatch my soul. I slide under the covers and stare at all the Redskin stuff everywhere. I see posters and helmets signed by players and four books of what I assume are football cards. I slip into one of his t-shirts, my usual bedtime attire, and climb into into bed.
I hear the water cut off, so I lay awake, waiting for him to come to bed. I glance at the clock. Oh, wow, it’s already 1:45 in the morning. I close my eyes and wait for my man to scoot next to me. It only takes a couple of minutes before I feel his warm body next to mine. I turn on my side so that I’m facing him, and he strokes my cheek with his thumb.
“You’re beautiful, you know that?” he whispers, never taking his blue eyes off mine.
“You’re not so bad yourself, sport,” I giggle, reaching up to touch his hand, relishing in the feel of his skin against mine.
He laughs softly. “We compliment each other well, don’t we? We just...work. I don’t know how else to put it.”
I can think of three words that put it nicely.
I bite my tongue trying to hold that thought in. I can’t bring myself to tell him yet, so I will wait for him. Besides, when I say those words, I want them to really mean something to the both of us. So I know if he’s says it first, then he will rest assured that I feel the exact same way. I wish Matt didn’t screw me up so bad. Maybe if he didn’t, I would have an easier time letting my true feelings show. But since that’s not the case, I just have to roll with the punches and see where our relationship takes us.
Even though my brain is trying to go into overdrive to process the day, I feel my eyes starting to droop and I know I won’t be able to hold out much longer. So, just before I fall asleep, I kiss Donovan’s lips and say, “Good night.”
Just as I start to drift off, I hear him say, “Good night, baby doll. Sweet dreams.” I also hear something else, but I can’t make it out before I fall into a deep sleep. I’ll have to remember to ask him tomorrow what he said...
Chapter 8
Donovan
I cover my mouth as the words start to come out. I almost let it slip. It just came out so naturally that I didn’t even think about it before I said it.
Stupid!
I can’t tell Allie I love her for the first time like that, laying in my old room after we just screwed each other’s brains out. I don’t just want to use those three words so casually. I hear my co-workers tell their spouses ‘I love you’ and it seems to me they don’t even mean it anymore. One of them even has a twenty something year old mistress that he takes to the hotel across the street, while his wife is home taking care of their three children. Sick bastard. It sounds so automatic when they get off the phone, but then they go back to bitching about their wives spending all their money and how irritating they are. To me, that doesn’t sound like love. Day in, day out, it’s the same thing for those guys; go to work, fuck their mistress, go home to their wives and kiss their cheek as they come in the door. I don’t want to turn into one of those guys. I don’t want to say it because it’s a habit; I want to say it because I mean it every single day of my life. I think it’s kind of a big deal.
I watch her breathing slow as she drifted off into a deep sleep. I know I sound like such a pussy when I say this, but I could watch her sleep for hours. There’s no stress etched on her beautiful face, no worries about going to PA school, no thoughts of Claire. God, that bitch screwed me up so bad. I blame my stepmother for it, too. I roll onto my back and think about the time Pops and Donna told me they were sending me to boarding school.
“ But, Dad, I don’t wanna go away to school!”
“I know, son, but your stepmother and I believe it’s best for you. Besides, it’s a great school and you won’t be that far away,” Pops looked sad, like he didn’t believe what he was saying himself.
“Why do you want to send me away?” My tears started to sting my eyes and threatened to come down any second. Why didn’t they want me?
“Boy, it’s not like that, I swear to you. I agree with Donna that you would do much better if you...aren’t around all this stress. The schools are this area are not up par, in my opinion.” Pops started rubbing the back of his neck, one of his nervous habits.
“So it’s her that wants me to go away!” My tears started to pour out of my eyes. How could she do this to me? I hate her! I can’t stand her and I want her out of our lives.
Donna bent down to me and put her hand on my shoulder. “Now listen, you are going to have a wonderful time there. I know that you need to get away from here, why, with the stress of your mother leaving you.” She always knew out to push my buttons. I wanted to punch her right in the nose, but I knew she would just get another nose job. She’s so fake; she looks like one of my sister’s Barbie dolls.
I grabbed her hand and brushed it off of me. “Don’t touch me.” My anger was ready to boil over. I had to leave my friends, my sister, my dad, and my school. I still had to be that rich boy that had to act like my family’s better than everyone. I just wanted to be a normal kid, and I was finally starting to be. But Donna just screwed me out of it.
I turned away from them and ran back to my room. I threw myself on the bed and cried for an hour. They shipped me off the next week.
Aw, dammit. That memory just pisses me off like it happened yesterday. Don’t get me wrong, I ended up liking being at St. Paul’s because I got away from Donna. I also met friends like Gabriel and...well, Frankie was a really good friend of mine. Only trouble with being his friend now is that he’s the son of Frank Dubois, Claire’s dead husband. Frankie still blames his death on me and I feel like shit every time I think about him. I didn’t know Claire was going to kill Frank; I had no fucking idea.
I have got to stop thinking about deep shit like this late at night. Now I’m never going to get to bed. I roll back over to face Allie and it makes me smile. Her lips are parted and she looks like she’s dreaming. I wonder what about. I decide not to disturb her anymore and roll out of bed quietly. I know that Gabe is still awake; I need to talk to him about some stuff, like how I’m going to tell Allie that I love her and how am I going to break it to her I’ve been lying to her. Maybe I’ll leave that last part out.
I tiptoe out of the room so I don’t wake her and I silently close the door. I head down the hallway to the guest room that Gabe’s in and knock. I know it’s the night before his wedding, so Stacey’s not in there with him. I’m sure she wanted to keep the tradition and not see him until the wedding tomorrow. “Uh, come in,” he says, probably wondering who
the hell is coming to his room at two in the morning.
I slowly open the door and I see him sitting on his bed with his laptop turned on. “Geez, dude. You don’t take a break from work, even the night before you get married.”
He laughs and shuts the computer down. “You know me. Always working, always trying to make that money.” Then he cocks his head to the side. “So, why are you in my room this late?”
I plop down in the wicker chair near the bed. “When did you know you loved Stacey?”
“Ah, I see.” He shakes his head knowingly. “You love Allie and you don’t know how to tell her?”
“Dude, I asked you the first question. How did you know?” My body is so tired, but my mind is going a mile a minute.
“Well, I’ll tell you as long as you don’t tell the guys that I got all deep about this love shit, alright?” Gabe says. “I’m serious. I don’t want them thinking I’m pussy whipped.”
“Okay, deal. I won’t tell them Stace has your balls in a vice grip as long as you don’t tell them Allie has mine, too.”
“Alright, deal. So, I knew I loved Stacey when I wasn’t able to get her off my mind for more than five minutes. We were texting, emailing, and calling whenever we weren’t together.” He smiles as he thinks about his bride to be. “ I knew she loved me when she would do the little things for me, like giving me head.”
“Aw, come on!” I wrinkle my nose in disgust as Gabe bursts in a fit of laughter. Some things never change. He was always the one with the sense of humor that got all the girls. At least he finally landed one that will put up with his crap.
“Yeah, I’m kidding. Well, kinda kidding.” He gives a smart ass grin. “In all seriousness, we just knew. We figured out that there was no one else on Earth that we wanted to spend the rest of our lives with more than each other.”
I sigh, feeling like a heavy weight is crushing my chest. I feel like that about Allie, too, but she doesn’t know everything about me. She might change her whole opinion of me once she learns the truth, and I don’t know if I can handle her leaving me. My heart sinks into my stomach and I know I can’t keep my past from her much longer. She’s been really understanding by giving me the time and space that I need, not nagging me like some of the girls I’ve been with.
“Uh, you alright?” Gabe asks, snapping me out of my pity party.
“Yeah, I’m just thinking. I’m not sure how to tell Allie,” I say, absentmindedly. My mind wanders back to that sleeping girl in my bed, and I honestly feel like I’m going to cry.
“Look, you have to be honest with her. Have you told her about how you and Claire...first hooked up?” He chooses his words carefully, knowing that I can’t stand talking about her.
“No, not yet. I told her that I met her while trying to make some money doing yard work.”
“Are you fucking kidding me? Are you serious?” His mouth is practically on the floor, staring at me in total disbelief. “Has she read that book about the grey tie and that BDSM shit yet? Because if she has, she might be a little suspicious. Stacey read that series and I know more about that book than I care to think about.”
“Hell no, I haven’t told her. She would flip the fuck out if I told her how it really happened. I”m not ready to cross that bridge yet.” I put my head in my hands. “I want to enjoy her while I can.” I can’t believe I used that excuse. I remember one of the girls I was “seeing” was reading those books and told me all about it. Of course, I wanted to try all the sex stuff. I didn’t even realize I was paying attention to the other details.
“You know, it’s going to make her even madder when she finds out the truth,” he says, his voice taking on a scolding tone.
“Let me worry about that. You worry about getting married tomorrow.” I stand to leave. “Good night, man.” I walk to the door and turn to look back at him, knowing he has something else to say. We’ve been friends way too long, because I know he always gets the last word in.
“If she learns what happened and stays, then you know she loves you. But if she leaves you, then she still may love you, but you’re going to have a lot of kissing up to do.” My best friend looks me dead in the eye. “Tell her soon, Don. It will only hurt more if you prolong it.”
I nod, unable to form any words. I know he’s right, and it makes me sick to my stomach. I’m going to go back to bed, and relish in the time that I have with Allie.
Chapter 9
Allie
I wake up to Donovan wrapped all around me. His legs are tangled with mine, his head is resting on my breasts, and his hands grip my hips. No wonder I woke up, he’s practically laying right on top of me. I’m burning up, so I try to untangle our bodies as gently as I can, hoping not to wake him. It’s early, the sun is just now rising. Great, even when I go to bed late, I still get up early. I blame that on my dad. He would wake Jon and me up at the ass-crack of dawn and have us help him with chores, so that my mom could sleep in a little more. It certainly made me a much more responsible adult, I’ll give him that.
Since there is no way I’m going back to sleep now, I decide to get up and do my morning stretches. I slip on my yoga pants and a tank top. I do that mostly so that if someone wants to pop in Donovan’s room again, at least I’m dressed this time. As I start to warm up, I hear footsteps down the hall. Geez, someone’s up early. I’m curious as to who it is, so I crack the door slightly. I hope it’s not Donna, but something tells me that woman doesn’t get up before noon. I see it’s Megan and she has her bridesmaid’s dress in hand. I step out into the hallway and grin at her.
“Wow, you’re up early, too, huh?”
“Yeah, your brother likes to use me as his teddy bear and he made me way too hot,” I giggle and she joins in.
“Ha! I know the feeling. Adam does the same crap to me,” she shakes her head. “Well, since you’re awake, you wanna come downstairs with me? I’m getting everything ready for the bride and bridesmaids. We’re getting dressed in the main bathroom.”
“Bathroom? Is there enough room in there?” I ask, honestly puzzled. Then I remember. I’m in the Callahan mansion, of course there is enough room. We begin walking down the hallway towards the stairs.
“Trust me, you could probably use it as the locker room for the Falcons. We use it for weddings. Thank God I don’t have to clean it,” she laughs.
“Can I get ready with you girls? I mean, if it’s okay?” Since I’m used to having Livey put my makeup on for me, maybe one of them can give me a hand. If I try to do it, I look like Crayola tried to gangbang my face.
“Of course you can! You’re practically family in my eyes.” Megan’s lips curl up to reveal a perfect white smile, just like her brother’s. I flush at her comment. Part of the family? “Donovan is really happy with you. I can tell.”
“I would like to think so,” I say. The thought of making him happy makes my heart do flips inside my chest.
“Girl, he’s crazy about you. Every time I talk to him, the conversation always turns to you. I’ve never seen him this way.” She stares off in the distance. “In fact, I can’t think of a single person that has ever had this effect on him. Not even Claire.” I flinch at the mention of her name.
“What do you know about her?” I don’t want to pry too much, but getting Donovan to talk about it is like trying to pull teeth. Maybe his baby sister can clue me in.
“Mostly everything I know is from the gossip magazines,” Megan rolls her blue eyes and shakes her head. “She wasn’t very nice to my brother. He always complained about how she treated him or how much of a stalker she was.”
Oh God, “She stalked him? Why would you need to stalk your boyfriend?”
“She apparently had some trust issues, among other things that were wrong with her. He told me that she would cause a scene if a girl even looked in his direction. I mean, that’s psycho.” I notice that she runs her fingers through her hair, too. Donovan and Megan could be twins if it wasn’t for the age difference.
“I shoul
d have known. She seems like she could be crazy,” I mutter, mostly to myself.
“Has Donovan told you that she may have killed her husband because of him?” she says in a quiet voice that I almost couldn’t hear.
I whip my head around to look at her. “Well, not exactly. I actually asked him myself and he said he didn’t know for sure, but it’s possible.”
She lets out a sigh. “As much as my brother wanted to keep it a secret, we all suspected he was seeing Claire while she was still married to Frank. I mean, we don’t know for how long because he didn’t talk about it much. He never even mentioned her name until they came out publicly as a couple.” She bites her bottom lip, making it look like she’s thinking about the next words that come out her mouth. “I think she did it for Donovan, but in the trial, it came out that Claire had taken out a two hundred million life insurance policy on her husband only a week before he died. That made her look awfully guilty.” She shakes her head in disgust. “Claire is an evil, psycho bitch that will stop at nothing to get what she wants. That’s why I’m glad she’s never getting out of prison. At least, I hope not.”
