Keeping Her

by Allie Everhart

  "Father." I skip knocking and just open the door. He's sitting behind his long mahogany desk, his head down, a pen in his hand and a stack of papers in front of him. The office is dark, except for the small amount of light coming from his desk lamp. The light shines down directly onto his papers, so from where I'm standing, my father just looks like an outlined shadow of a man in a suit.

  He lifts his head slightly. "Pearce."

  I check to make sure I can see both his hands. It doesn't really matter. I know he keeps a gun in his desk drawer and I know he keeps it loaded. If he wanted to kill me, he could, and I wouldn't be able to stop him. I know he needs to keep me around to take over the company, but if his rage takes over, he won't be thinking about that. He'll only be thinking about how to get rid of me so he never has to see me again.

  I slowly walk into the room. "I spoke with Mother and she said you heard the news regarding my engagement."

  He sets his pen down. "That's correct."

  I stop, not sure what to say next. I was expecting him to do all the talking while I just stood here, letting him tell me what a horrible son I am.

  "Sit down, Pearce." He motions to the chair across from him.

  I cautiously step forward and lower myself into the wooden chair. I feel like I'm a child again. I've sat in this chair many times, for as long as I can remember. I've received many punishments while sitting here. I've also been criticized in this chair. Yelled at. Been told I'm useless. A disappointment. Not good enough. Not smart enough.

  This chair has bad memories, which I'm certain is why he told me to sit in it.

  "Go ahead, Father." I want to get this over with. This is already taking way too long.

  "I didn't invite you here, Pearce. You came here to see me. Did you have a purpose, or were you just stopping by to say hello? You should know it's inappropriate to show up unannounced, especially at this late hour."

  "I'm aware of that, Father."

  "You didn't answer my question. What is the purpose of your visit?"

  I take a breath, but I don't get much air in. The walls of my chest are closing in fast, crushing my lungs and making it impossible to breathe.

  "I know you don't approve of her, but I am in a relationship with Rachel."

  "The girl your mother and I found at your apartment."

  "Yes. That's her."

  "You said she was nothing more than a sex toy. Someone to mix things up from the associates."

  I clench my fists, trying to hold in my rage at hearing him call Rachel a 'sex toy.'

  "I never said that about her. Jack is the one who told you that."

  "So Jack was lying to me?"

  Shit. What do I say? I have to protect Jack. He protected me and I have to repay him for that.

  "Jack wasn't lying. I told Jack I was only involved in a physical relationship with Rachel so that he'd leave us alone. If Jack had known I was seeing her for real, he would've forbid it. He would've put an end to it and reported it to the members. He made that clear, several times. He warned me repeatedly to stay away from her."

  "He still should've ended it." My father picks up his pen and taps it on the table. "If he had, we wouldn't be having this conversation."

  "He wasn't aware it had gone on for so long. He thought I had just started seeing her."

  "I hired Jack to do surveillance on you last September while I was in Europe. I had him follow your every move until I returned in November. He never mentioned this girl until I asked him about her that night I found her in your apartment. So he's either incompetent in his surveillance work or he was lying to me. And given that he's an expert in surveillance, that would lead me to surmise that he was lying."

  Dammit. I didn't expect Jack to be drawn into this. My father already hates Jack and I don't want their ongoing feud becoming even worse because of my actions. And I don't want my father reporting Jack to the organization, accusing him of being involved in this.

  "He wasn't lying, Father. I kept Rachel hidden. We always stayed in. I never took her out."

  "Getting back to your reason for coming here. Since you seem unable to explain yourself, I will take an educated guess." He pauses. "You're here to tell me you're engaged to the girl, in the off chance that I would not have heard about it by now, despite the fact that it was announced on all the financial news outlets as well as several major newspapers."

  "I assumed you would've heard by now, so no, that's not why I'm here."

  He holds his hand up in the air. "Let me take another guess. You wanted to rub my face in the fact that you went behind my back and did something you knew would embarrass the family and harm our family name and the future of our company."

  "That was not at all my intention. This announcement will not harm the company in any way. And as for our family, my marriage to Rachel is not a detriment to us. She's a very intelligent woman who comes from a good family. She'll graduate with her masters degree in a few weeks, which makes her more educated than my last wife."

  My father says nothing. He just stares at me, tapping his pen on his desk is a slow, steady rhythm.

  I can't take the silence. "What is it, Father?"

  He's still silent, then finally says, "You can't possibly think you are actually going to marry this girl."

  "Our engagement has been announced. The marriage has to occur. If it didn't, then as you said earlier, it would embarrass the family and could be a detriment to the company. Breaking off an engagement would only show people that I'm not the mature, responsible man that you expect me to be. And that our clients expect me to be, as the future CEO of Kensington Chemical."

  He sits up straighter. "Are you really that ignorant, Pearce?"

  I clench my fists. "Explain yourself, Father."

  "The biggest embarrassment to our family is not the engagement itself, but the person you are engaged to." He leans forward, his arms on the desk, his eyes narrowed. "YOU, my son, have now announced to the world that a Kensington is fucking some low-life degenerate hick from God-knows-where Indiana."

  I lean forward as well. "Do NOT refer to her that way EVER again. And I did NOT announce to the world that I am fucking her. I announced that I am MARRYING her."

  He bursts up from his chair and slams his fist on the desk. "You are NOT marrying her! We will find a way to minimize the damage you have caused with this engagement and you will be punished for doing so in the first place. And you will be punished by the organization as well for not following the rules."

  I stand up so that we're face to face. "There is no rule in place forbidding me from marrying her."

  "There is going to be within a matter of days."

  "Yes. But as of now, there isn't."

  My lips turn up just the slightest bit and he notices. I see the movement of his chest and hear him breathing hard.

  "What are you saying, Pearce?" he asks through gritted teeth.

  "I'm saying." I stand up straighter and look him directly in the eye. "I already married her."

  He straightens up as well, his eyes not leaving mine. He's silent. Too angry to speak. Too angry to hide what he's feeling. His face, which never tells me anything, is now giving him away. He's not just angry. He's also confused. Confused as to how this could've happened. Shocked that it did.

  For once in my life, I feel like I beat him. He looks like he's trapped in a corner and can't find a way out. Seeing him like this makes me feel an overwhelming sense of power. A sense of control.

  I should relish it and keep quiet. But I can't. I need to finish this.

  "Rachel and I got married in Las Vegas last weekend. It's a shame you and mother couldn't be there. But I'm hoping you'll be able to attend the wedding in March. The invitations will be sent out shortly. Be sure you and mother RSVP. It's inappropriate to show up unannounced," I say, throwing his words back at him. "Goodnight, Father."

  I turn and walk out of the room, not looking back. I said what I came here to say and I'm leaving before he can stop me. For once, I'm get
ting the last word.

  That look on his face just now is one I'll never forget. It was one of pure shock. He's trying to figure out what just happened. Unable to believe I would challenge his authority. Unable to believe I would even dare to try to have my own life. A life without him controlling me. A life in which I'm happy.

  This is just the beginning of a long battle between us. But tonight? I feel like I won the first round.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  4

  PEARCE

  As I'm driving back to my loft, the thrill of excitement I felt over telling off my father is quickly replaced by regret. I never should've done that. I know better than to talk to my father that way. As good as it felt to say those things to him, I just provoked him. Whatever punishment he had planned for me just became a million times worse. I knew he'd be furious about the marriage, but then I boasted about the fact that I went behind his back. It was the worse thing I could've done.

  When I arrive back at the loft, the lights are off, except for one small lamp on a side table. Rachel must've gone to sleep. It's late and I know she's tired from our trip.

  I hang up my coat and go to the bedroom and see her sound asleep. The sight of her there in my bed, here in my loft, allows me to breathe again. I was completely stressed just moments ago, but then I see her and I start to relax. She's my safe haven. My comfort. My home.

  I take off my suit jacket and set it on the chair in the corner. I wore a suit to my parents' house because it's the only attire that's acceptable to them. It used to be all I wore, but now Rachel has me dressing in jeans and casual shirts and I'm starting to like it. I undo my tie and my dress shirt and continue undressing until I'm down to my boxers.

  I slide into bed, trying not to disturb her. She's on her side with her back to me. I slip my hand around her waist and press my body against hers and just breathe, letting her presence calm me.

  "Pearce?" I hear her whisper.

  "I'm sorry I woke you," I whisper back.

  "It's okay." She turns to face me. "How'd it go?"

  I brush my fingers over her soft cheek. "Let's not talk about it. We need to sleep."

  "Are you going to work tomorrow?"

  "I don't know."

  It's true. I don't know if I should go there or not. I don't want to fight with my father at the office. It would be completely unprofessional and something our employees shouldn't witness. But I do have meetings tomorrow and people are counting on me to show up.

  "You seem really tense." She lays her head on my chest and hugs me. "I'm guessing it didn't go well. What did your parents say?"

  "I don't want to talk about this right now. We'll talk later."

  She reaches up and kisses me. "Pearce. I'm sorry."

  "You have nothing to be sorry for. My parents just aren't good people. And I can't change them."

  Her head lies back on my chest. "I love you."

  "I love you too." I keep my arms around her and hear her breathing change as she drifts back to sleep. I lie there awake for the next hour, then finally fall asleep myself.

  The next morning my alarm goes off at five, as it usually does. I turn it off, seeing no use in getting to the office this early. If I'm going into work, I'm not going in at six, when my father's the only one there. I need to wait until the other employees arrive, giving me somewhat of a barrier between him and me.

  I go back to sleep and wake up again at seven, unable to sleep any longer. This day will be hell, and the sooner it starts, the sooner it'll be over. I'm going to call Jack today and see if we can meet. It's another conversation I've been dreading and need to get over with.

  "I have to get to class," Rachel says, flipping over on her side.

  She's facing me so I lean in and kiss her. "Your class isn't until ten. It's only seven."

  "I know, but I have to get ready and it's a half hour drive and I wanted to spend some time at the library before class."

  I reach around her waist and draw her into me. "You're going to leave me here in bed all alone?"

  She smiles. "You're already late for work."

  "I'm on my honeymoon."

  "I think with everything going on, we'll have to skip the honeymoon."

  "We are most definitely not skipping the honeymoon. I'm taking you somewhere." I leave kisses along her neck. "Some place we can be alone and spend all day in bed if we choose."

  "Pearce, we can't go anywhere. People think we're engaged, not married. We can't go on a honeymoon until after the second wedding."

  "We can still go on a trip. People don't have to know it's a honeymoon." I slip my hand under the silk nightgown I bought her. It's short and has thin straps on top. I wasn't sure if she'd wear it once we got back from Vegas because she normally wears cotton pajamas to bed. But I hope she continues to wear it at least some of the time because it's incredibly sexy on her.

  She puts her hand behind my neck, gently massaging it. "Where would you like to go?"

  "Where would YOU like to go?" I kiss her. "I'll take you anywhere."

  "I haven't been to many places, so I'm not really sure."

  "How about Italy?"

  Her eyes widen and she smiles. "Are you serious? Italy?"

  I smile back. "From your response, I take it you've always wanted to go to Italy."

  "I would love to go there."

  "Then that's where we'll go. We'll leave in a few weeks, right after your graduation."

  "But we'll miss Christmas."

  "Yes, I forgot about that. Are you wanting to go back to Indiana at Christmas?"

  "I don't know. I was thinking we should spend Christmas with your parents since we're spending Thanksgiving with mine."

  "I can tell you right now that we will not be attending Christmas at the Kensington estate."

  "Do you think they'll still be mad at you in a month?"

  "Don't worry about them. Just tell me when you'd like to leave and I'll get to work on the travel arrangements."

  "Let me talk to my mom. Maybe I could miss Christmas this year. I'd really love to get away for a while. I could tell my parents it's a graduation gift. They know how hard I've worked this past year and if I told them I was going to Italy, I don't think they'd mind if I missed Christmas."

  "I wish my parents were as understanding as yours."

  "Believe me, I didn't think my parents would be this understanding. I think the only reason they are is because they can tell how happy I am with you. I know my parents don't agree with a lot of my decisions, but in the end they just want me to be happy."

  I kiss her. "So you're happy?"

  "Extremely."

  I kiss her again and that's all it takes to make us forget about work and school and focus on each other. I slip off her nightgown and we start the day on a high, first in bed, then in the shower.

  Then she heads to New Haven and I head to the office. When I get to my desk, I'm surprised to see that nothing has changed. The stacks of paperwork that were there last Friday are still there, and there's a folder on one of them that contains spreadsheets printed out just this morning. So I guess I'm still working here.

  "Pearce, the meeting is in 1A instead of 1B." I look up and see Marshall, one of the marketing guys, standing at my door. "We had to change rooms because your father is using the other room."

  I nod. "Thank you. I'll be there shortly."

  I tensed up when he mentioned my father. Part of me wondered if he'd even show up here today. I thought he might be home, plotting his revenge.

  My meeting starts in a few minutes so I gather what I need, but as I'm heading out of my office, my cell phone rings. It's the organization calling. I have a sick feeling this is about me. I step back in my office and shut the door.

  I answer the phone, and instead of hearing a recording like I usually do, I hear someone speaking. It's a deep voice and he asks for my member number. After I give it to him, he says, "The ruling council is currently reviewing details of your involvement with Rachel Evans."

&nb
sp; Just hearing him say her name sends a chill through me. I don't want her involved with them in any way. I don't even want them knowing she exists. Obviously I know they do, but up until now, I've told myself they'll leave her alone. That this is all about me, and that I'll handle it and keep her out of it. But I need to face the facts, and the cold hard facts are that Rachel is part of this now. She doesn't know it, and probably never will, but she's still part of it.

  Guilt and panic fill me as I realize what I've done. I brought Rachel into this. What the hell was I thinking? How could I be so selfish? I was so focused on making her part of my life, thinking I could keep her hidden away in only the good part. Thinking she'd never be exposed to the bad. But she's exposed to it just by being married to me. Before, she was just a regular girl, going to college and living her life. But now, she's my wife, and the organization knows about her. And I have no idea what they'll do.

  The deep voice speaks again. "Pearce. Are you still there?"

  "Yes. Continue."

  "This Sunday, there will be a meeting to discuss how we will deal with your relationship with Ms. Evans. The meeting will be at location 182 and will commence at noon. An end time has not been given. This concludes the message."

  The phone goes dead. I toss it on my desk. "Shit!" I rub my forehead, but it doesn't relieve the intense throbbing behind my eyes.

  Someone knocks on my door. "Pearce?"

  "Yes. Come in."

  It's Marshall again. "Just letting you know we're ready to start the meeting. We didn't want to start without you."

  "Go ahead. I'll be there in a minute."

  I grab my phone and shove it in my suit jacket, then try to compose myself for this meeting. I don't even know why I'm going. Right now I need to be spending my time figuring out how to protect Rachel. But I'm not sure how to do that because I don't know what they're planning.

  I need to talk to Jack. I call his secretary. She says he's in a meeting but she puts me through to him anyway, saying he's been awaiting my call.

  "Pearce, where the fuck have you been?" He's angry, as I knew he would be.