“No. Nothing happened.” I took a deep breath. I shouldn’t bother Nick with my problems when he had so many other things on his mind. “It’s just been a long day, but I’ll be fine.”
“Are you sure?”
“I am.” Still holding the card, I stood and walked down the hall to my room. “Tell me about your day.”
Nick hesitated. “I had a lot of meetings. I don’t remember most of them. The ambassador from Germany spilled his coffee on my lucky tie, though. I remember that.”
“Poor you.” I found myself smiling, picturing Nick’s eyes twinkling as he thought of what he could say to cheer me up. “Do you think it’s at all strange that you have a lucky tie?”
“Not at all.”
“What makes it lucky?”
Nick’s voice deepened. “It’s the tie I was wearing when I met you.”
“Well, that was a sweet thing to say.” I suddenly felt like crying again, this time because I missed Nick. “I wish you were here with me.”
“Me, too.”
We fell into a comfortable silence. It was strange that even when he wasn’t saying anything at all, I still felt better just knowing he was there, listening on the other end of the phone.
“I should let you go,” I said reluctantly. “I’m sure you’re tired after a long day.”
“Eh, I won’t be able to sleep anyway,” he said. “My bed isn’t very inviting right now.”
“Is that so?”
I could practically hear his smirk. “Yeah, it’s missing the hot, naked girl I’ve grown used to sleeping with.”
“I’ll be back soon,” I promised. “Sweet dreams, Nick.”
“Back at you, Charley.”
Nick wasn’t the only one to have trouble sleeping. I lay awake for hours, tossing and turning in my childhood bed. By the time I finally did fall asleep, the sun was almost rising. When I woke up a few hours later, it was almost lunchtime.
I padded downstairs in my old flannel PJs and cat slippers in search of coffee. Something delicious wafted down the hall and I followed my nose to the kitchen. I could hear my parents talking and laughing and it made me smile.
“Coffee. Stat!” I announced loudly as I entered the room, pulling up short when I realized we had a guest.
“Look who’s here!” Mom clapped her hands and laughed at the stupefied expression on my face.
“Nick?”
He grinned at me, taking in my outfit and crazy bedhead. “Surprise.”
“What the hell are you doing here?”
His smile wavered just a bit. “I wanted to see you.”
Mom looked at Dad, then back at me. She seemed to sense that I was going to need a moment alone with Nick. “Your dad and I need to check on something in the other room,” she said, not at all subtly. “We’ll catch up with Nick in a bit.”
After they were gone, Nick tried again. “You sounded pretty upset last night. I wanted to make sure you are okay.”
“So you flew all the way here?” It seemed too ridiculous to be true. “Why?”
“Are you mad?” Nick’s face fell.
I was still so surprised to see him standing in my parents’ kitchen, holding one of their old coffee mugs, that I hadn’t exactly processed my feelings. But when he asked, I quickly ran through an assessment and determined that I felt exactly the opposite of mad.
“I’ll only be mad if you don’t get over here and kiss me.”
Nick set down his coffee so quickly that it spilled all over the counter. In three strides, he crossed the room and I threw my arms around him. He didn’t kiss me right away, instead just holding me close, my head on his chest, while he breathed in my scent. After several minutes, he finally pulled back slightly and kissed me.
“I can’t believe you’re here,” I said when we came up for air. It felt so good to be in his arms. “I missed you.”
“Good.” A small smile turned up the corners of his lips. “Nice PJs.”
I had forgotten that I was wearing flannel pajamas that were close to ten years old. Very purposefully, I stepped on his feet with my cat slippers. “Be honest, you’re totally turned on right now.”
“I can’t argue with that.” He glanced over my shoulder while slipping a hand under my top. His hand was warm against my side. “Too bad we have chaperones.”
“Too bad,” I agreed, only then remembering that my parents were in the next room. “We could go upstairs to my room…”
Nick’s eyes narrowed dangerously. “I can see your teenage bedroom and get a glimpse into sixteen-year-old Charley?”
I hadn’t exactly thought of it that way. “Actually, maybe we should do something else instead.”
“Oh, no, you don’t. You can’t make an offer like that and then take it away.” Nick waved a finger in my face. “That would be breaking a promise.”
I sighed. “Fine. But I really do need that coffee first.”
Fortunately, by the time the coffee was done brewing Mom had reentered the kitchen. It was apparent that she was dying to ask Nick questions and he seemed comfortable spilling his private details to her, so I left them alone to chat while I ran upstairs for a quick shower before putting on normal clothes.
By the time I interrupted them, they were laughing and gossiping like old friends.
“Nick was just telling me that you were at the White House. Why didn’t you tell us about that?” Mom didn’t look away from Nick as she scolded me. Like all other women, she was enthralled by him. Like mother, like daughter.
“It must’ve slipped my mind.” I glared at Nick. “What else did you tell my mother?”
“Not much. I was too busy listening to stories about you.” His smile made me uncomfortable. “Has Walter paid a visit?”
“Really, Mom? You told him about Walter?” I was starting to wish I’d had scotch rather than coffee.
“It’s endearing, Charlotte. You were very close to Walter growing up.” Mom apparently had no clue that she was only further embarrassing me.
“He was imaginary, Mom. I was six.” I frowned harder when I caught Nick laughing, bemused by the whole thing. “We’re leaving.”
Mom asked, “Will you be home for dinner? I’m sure you father would like to get to know Nick better.”
“I’m sure he would,” I muttered, grabbing Nick’s arm. “We’ll see. There’s a lot to do in this town, so we might not be back in time.”
In fact, the exact opposite was true. I was able to drive Nick around town in my mom’s old Chevy in less than fifteen minutes. Danville didn’t exactly have a lot of must-see landmarks. It did have an apple orchard, though, so I took Nick for some fresh apple cider.
“I don’t understand why there are so many types of apples,” he said as he watched me fill a basket.
“Some of them are good for eating fresh and others are better for baking,” I explained.
“Which type are these?” He held one up and eyed it suspiciously.
I plucked it from his hand and dropped it back into the basket. “These make the best apple pie you’ll ever taste.”
“Wait, are you going to bake me a pie?” Nick pretended to swoon. “I think I’m in love.”
“It’s not just for you,” I explained, stepping over to the counter where an elderly woman was taking payment. “Dad happens to love my apple pie.”
That was what I told Nick, but in fact my Mom’s apple pie was way better than mine and she made one almost every week. My pie was for Nick, and I was hoping to dazzle him with my baking skills. So, while Dad and Nick watched football in the living room, I rolled out the pie crust under Mom’s watchful eye.
“That looks good,” she said as I transferred it to the pie pan.
“It’s been a while since I’ve made a pie from scratch.” I started working on the apples next. “Hopefully I won’t screw it up.”
“Nick’s going to love it.” Mom smiled, knowing exactly what I was thinking. “He seems very smitten with you, darling.”
I looked
at her in surprise. “Really?”
“Definitely.”
“How do you know? You only just met him.” I couldn’t believe that I was actually asking my mom if she thought a boy liked me.
“Honey, he flew all the way out here just because he missed you. If that isn’t a sign that he’s smitten…” She reached for the wine bottle we had half-finished already. “I think you’re smitten with him as well.”
I sighed, defeated. “Is it that obvious?”
“You’re baking him a pie. You hate baking.” She topped off my glass and poured a healthy dose of wine for herself. “It’s nice to see. You seem happier than you have been in many years.”
“I told him everything,” I said quietly. “He knows about the shooting, about Tim.”
“That’s good,” she said with a satisfied nod. “You need to talk to someone about it and you never could open up to us. You haven’t changed your mind about tonight, have you?”
“No.”
The event at the high school was starting in less than two hours and I couldn’t wait for it to be over. Until then, I wouldn’t be able to think of much else. I knew that when my parents returned home from the ceremony they would have damp eyes and heavy hearts. They would want to talk about Tim and how our lives changed that day. I just wanted to hide in my bedroom until the whole thing was over.
Mom understood why I couldn’t go, even if she didn’t agree with my decision. “You and Nick can have some quiet time alone in the house then. Just remember, no boys in your bedroom when Dad and I are out.”
“Funny, Mom.” I was joking, but Mom likely wasn’t. “I think this is ready for the oven.”
She appraised my handiwork and nodded. “I agree.”
We ate dinner in the dining room like a happy family, something my family hadn’t done in years. Mom and Dad usually ate in front of the television while watching Wheel of Fortune. Nick had three servings of Mom’s lasagna and still had room for two slices of pie.
“I had no idea you are so domestic,” he teased as he helped me load the dishwasher later. “That pie was pretty delicious.”
“It’s all in the apples.”
Nick leaned against the counter while I added the dishwashing liquid and closed the door. Despite sleeping in so late, I was already tired. Keeping my parents from saying embarrassing things in front of Nick had been exhausting.
“What should we do tonight? I’m afraid we don’t have a lot of options. Though we will have more scandalous options once my parents leave.” I waggled my eyebrows at him.
“Tempting,” he said. “Are you up for a drive?”
“A drive? Where?” I couldn’t think of any place worth driving to at this time of night.
Nick shrugged. “We could find a quiet place to watch the sunset. Maybe count some shooting stars.”
“You’re such a romantic. I was thinking of hot sex and late night television.”
“Now who’s the romantic?” he quipped. “We can always do that later.”
“Fair enough.”
My parents headed to the school and Nick and I took Mom’s car for a drive. The town was quiet as I had expected, and Nick took a lazy loop around the outskirts of town.
“Do you have any idea where you are going?” I asked after we passed the same gas station for the third time. “You should really let me drive.”
“I never get to drive in D.C. anymore,” he complained. “Just let me have this.”
“Fine.”
When Nick turned on Cromwell Street, I sat up straight. “Not this street.”
“Hm?” Nick glanced at me, but he didn’t slow down.
“Nick. Not this street. Turn off.” I tried to keep the panic out of my voice, but I wasn’t very successful.
Nick continued to ignore me and twenty seconds later, he pulled into the parking lot at Danville High School.
“What are we doing here?” I asked through tight lips. My chest constricted painfully and it was hard to breathe.
Nick turned off the engine and undid his seatbelt. When he faced me, he was calm and serious. “Your father and I had a talk earlier and he explained what’s happening tonight.”
I stared hard at him and didn’t say anything.
“He thinks that you need to be here, Charley, and I tend to agree.” Nick reached over and took my hand which was shaking uncontrollably. “I know you don’t want to do this, but you’ll feel better once you face this place.”
“No.”
It was all that I could manage to say through gasping breaths. The idea of walking through those front doors made me feel like I could pass out at any second.
“Charley.” Nick used his other hand to cup my face, forcing me to look only at him. “I’m not saying this is going to be easy. I know it’s traumatizing for you. But I’ll be right next to you the whole time. I promise.”
“I can’t.” My whisper was so quiet it was barely audible.
“You can.” Nick’s eyes penetrated mine, like he was able to see all the way to my soul. “I know that you can. You are strong, Charley. You’re a survivor.”
My eyes closed, trying to keep him out. But it was too late; I’d already let him in. After several shaky, deep breaths, I opened them again. “Okay. I’ll try.”
Nick gave me a long look and then kissed me softly. I waited after he exited the car for him to open my door. Only after he took my hand again did I feel strong enough to stand. My legs were shaky and Nick put his arm around me for support.
“I’ve got you,” he said, and I knew that he did. Nick would never let me fall.
The closer we got to the school, the harder it was to keep moving forward. The last time I had taken those steps had been the morning of the shooting when life was still easy and my family was still whole. Somehow, I made it all the way to the doors before stopping.
“Are you doing okay? Do you need a minute?” Nick stopped us just outside the entrance.
“I’m okay.” Now that I had made it this far, turning back seemed even harder than continuing forward. “Let’s do this.”
The minute the door opened, everything came rushing back. The school smelled exactly the way I remember. Laughter and conversation flowed out to us, overwhelming me with how normal it sounded. I stepped into the lobby slowly, this time leading Nick. I no longer needed him to keep me on my feet, I could stand on my own.
“My locker was over that way,” I said, pointing down a hallway on the left. “Tim’s locker was way down there. He used to always complain about how far away it was.”
It was strange that it didn’t hurt to say his name. Remembering him felt natural.
I wasn’t ready to see the cafeteria yet, so I took Nick on a tour of the school. Everyone else seemed eager to get good seats for the ceremony, so we were able to walk around without much interference. A few faces looked familiar to me, but that wasn’t a surprise. At one time, I had probably known everyone in Danville.
“This is the library,” I said, gesturing through the open library doors. “Tim got caught going to third base with the head cheerleader in the stacks.”
“I think Tim and I would’ve been friends,” Nick said with a laugh.
I smiled wistfully. “I think you’re right about that.”
Now that I thought about it, Nick reminded me a lot of Tim. I had no doubt they would’ve loved teaming up to tease me relentlessly and get into trouble.
“I would show you the gym, but it always smelled like sweat and feet,” I said, wrinkling my nose.
“The ceremony is about to start,” Nick said gently after glancing at his watch. “Are you ready?”
I wasn’t sure that I was, but I said, “As ready as I’ll ever be.”
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Nick
The cafeteria was crowded. From the hallway, it seemed like every seat was filled. An older man who introduced himself as the school principal began to speak.
“Should we find a seat?” I asked uncertainly.
&n
bsp; We were standing in the doorway and Charley seemed to be frozen in place.
“I’m good right here,” she said.
Principal Watkins held the crowd captive as he delivered his opening remarks, starting with what he called “honoring the victims.” Then he introduced a few guest speakers, all of which had been students at Danville during the shooting. None of them had been in the cafeteria, though. Charley had been the only person to walk out of this cafeteria ten years ago.
Charley had mostly been standing motionless, but she soon began to tremble. I grabbed her hand.
“He died right there,” she said quietly, nodding to the spot on the floor. “I need to go.”
I followed her as she hurried from the room and down the long corridor. She only slowed when she reached the door leading outside.
“Charley, slow down.” I grabbed her arm and pulled her to a stop. “It’s okay.”
“I know.” She looked back toward the cafeteria. “I appreciate what you tried to do tonight, bringing me here. But I don’t belong here. I’m not like all those other people who are so desperate to hold onto the past by remembering every painful second.”
The air was much cooler by the door and she began to shiver. I put a hand on her shoulder and said, “Okay. Let’s go home then.”
“You’re not going to fight me on this?” She was surprised.
“No.” I shrugged. “I just wanted you to try. You did that. If it didn’t help you, it didn’t help you. No use forcing you to be miserable.”
I put my arm around her and held her close to my body.
“I’m glad we came here,” she said. “It wasn’t as hard as I thought. I have more good memories of this place than bad. It’s just that the bad memories are really bad.”
“Can’t argue with that.” I glanced at her. “So you’re not mad at me for forcing you to come?”
“You flew all the way to Danville just to be with me. How could I be mad at you?”
“You’re right. I’m pretty great.” I kissed her forehead. “You are a lucky girl.”
She laughed and pulled me toward the door. “If we hurry home, you can still get lucky tonight, too.”
“I’ll drive,” I said, hurrying to catch up.
Another Vice (Forever Moore Book 2) Page 12
