by Beth Wiseman
“It won’t be long before we see the nose. Twins are the norm, but plenty of the does have had single births, and I have three sets of triplets.”
Matt’s eyes narrowed. “She sounds like she’s dying. Are you sure she’s okay?”
“Childbirth is painful. Or so I’ve heard.” She paused when Popsicle fell onto her side. “This is it.”
“Is that normal?” Matt asked again. “I mean, for her to just fall over like that?” He grinned. “I told you I didn’t know much about goats.”
“I’ve had a few actually deliver standing up, but most of them lie down like this right before they kid.” Becky touched Matt on the arm. “There’s the nose!”
Matt’s jaw hung low as he stared, but when he covered her hand with his, Becky jerked her hand back. What was I thinking?
“Uh-oh.” Becky rubbed the goat on her back as she wailed.
“What’s wrong?”
“She’s having trouble pushing. See the tongue hanging out of the kid’s mouth?”
“Is the baby dead?”
“Nee. But I’m going to help her.” Becky gently latched onto the tiny hooves and nose the way she’d done several times before. “Just so you know, you should never do this until you see the nose. Don’t ever pull on just the hooves.” She easily pulled the doe out, cleared the sack from her tiny face, and then laid her near Popsicle’s head. “There you go, Momma. It’s a girl.”
She looked back at Matt. His eyes widened, and he grinned. “Do you have one named Jellybean?”
“Nee.” Becky bit her bottom lip. “Do you, um . . . want to name her Jellybean?”
“I think that’s a great name. What do you think?”
I think you are the most wonderful man on the planet. “I think that sounds great.”
Matt chuckled and pointed. “I can’t believe Jellybean is already standing up.”
“It doesn’t take long. She’ll latch on and start nursing soon, but—” Becky pointed at Popsicle, whose belly had begun to contract again. The doe cried out, and Becky looked at Matt. “Here we go again.”
They both sat down next to Popsicle. Almost an hour later she had delivered two more kids.
“I think we both missed supper,” she said when the last of the babies stood up and started nursing.
“It was worth it, though. Wanta go check out your fence now?”
“Ya. Then we’ll find you three does. I’ll pick out ones that have birthed before and are gut mudders. I’ve had a few that weren’t very responsible. They’d just go off and leave their babies. It doesn’t happen too often, but I’d feel better giving you older does who shouldn’t have problems delivering, and ones that are also gut milk producers.”
“So you think one buck and three does is okay?” Matt got in step with her as they resumed their trek to the fence.
“Ya, I think that would be gut. I keep the new mudders and babies away from the herd until the babies are ready to be weaned, which is usually two or three months.”
Becky pulled on the fence where her father had been working. “See how Daed added chicken wire here? The goats can’t get their heads stuck when there is chicken wire.”
Matt nodded.
“They love eating off the bush on the other side of the fence in this particular spot, so this is usually where they get stuck. So Daed covered this area with chicken wire on top of the hog wire.” She let out a heavy sigh. “But they get stuck in other areas too. We need to have chicken wire running the length of the fence to really keep them all safe.” She shook her head. “But that’s a huge job, and hard on Daed’s back. And Ruben works with James, Hope’s boy, on Saturdays. They mow lawns for several Englisch families in town to make extra money.” She laughed. “Although now that James is sweet on a girl, he apparently isn’t as interested in that extra money. It might end up being just Ruben’s job. Either way, I’m going to talk to Daed about hiring someone to put chicken wire all around. That’s the only way the problem will be solved.”
Matt raised an eyebrow. “I’m looking for an extra job. Maybe I could do it? I could work Saturdays and in the evenings after supper. This time of year it stays light longer.”
Just the thought of Matt being at her house almost every day made Becky quiver. “Really? It’s hard work, and it’s really hot.”
Matt pushed back his straw hat and winked. “I’m your man. Talk to your daed and let me know. I could start right away.”
“I will.” She smiled. “Now, let’s go find your goats.”
Chapter Six
Becky fought to contain her excitement when her father agreed to hire Matt, starting on Saturday. But tonight she was having supper with Elam, and she wondered what was on his mind.
She was sitting on the porch steps when he pulled up, and she hurried to the buggy. These days she was feeling lighter and lighter. She’d already taken in her dresses several inches.
“I thought we’d go somewhere new tonight. We always go get pizza or burgers. I thought we’d try the new place farther down Lincoln Highway, the one with the big red sign. It’s a steak place.”
“Elam, I’ve heard that place is fancy. And expensive. We don’t have to go there.”
Elam laughed. “You’re worried because you think it’s your turn to buy. I already told you that I won’t have my dates buying meals.”
Becky twisted her mouth from side to side. “When did we go from being best friends to . . . dating?” She squeezed her eyes closed for a moment, unsure how Elam was going to take the comment.
“That’s what I want to talk to you about. But let’s wait until we get to the restaurant.”
“Okay.” Becky fell silent. She had ten minutes to figure out a good reason for not dating him. Because I really like Matt. Because I love you like a bruder. Because you’re my best friend, and I don’t see you that way.
Nothing sounded good. Why would Elam want to date me anyway? Things are good the way they are. And I’m fat.
“Elam, this is way too fancy,” Becky whispered as the waitress ushered them to an empty table in the far corner of the restaurant. “What would the bishop say? And this is going to cost a fortune.” She eyed the cloth-covered tables, each one with a lit candle in the middle and a vase of fresh chrysanthemums. Soft piano music was playing in the background.
“No worries,” Elam whispered back before they took their seats.
This was the type of restaurant where someone would propose. Surely not.
As soon as the waitress handed them each a menu, Becky scanned the prices and let out a small gasp. “Elam!” she said. “Let’s leave.”
“Nee, it’s fine, Becky.” Elam glanced up at her over his menu. “And would you please eat? I know you’re dieting, but I want you to enjoy a gut meal.”
“I’m really not very hungry. I’ll just get a salad.” For $8.99. She shook her head.
When the waitress returned, Elam ordered a twenty-three-dollar entrée, something Becky had never heard of, but she was pretty sure he pronounced it wrong. The waitress grinned and nodded. Becky ordered the salad.
“What do you want to talk to me about?” Her stomach churned and she clenched her hands at her sides. “Is something wrong?”
Elam took a sip of water. “Nee, nothing is wrong. I wanted to bring you somewhere nice. And . . .” He hesitated. “I know we’ve been good friends for a long time, but . . .”
Becky held her breath. All she’d ever wanted was to be loved by a man. But now that the moment was upon her, she could think of nothing but Matt. Even if Matt never took a romantic interest in her, would it really be fair to settle for Elam as second choice?
“I love you, Becky.”
There it was. She kept holding her breath.
“I’ve loved you since we were little, and I know you love me too. But I want to . . .” He paused. “I want to marry you someday.”
Becky sent up a silent prayer of thanks that Elam wasn’t actually proposing today. But she knew that no matter how she relayed
her feelings, Elam was going to be hurt.
“Why would you want to marry me, Elam?” Becky looked down at herself. She was noticeably thinner but still had a good forty pounds to lose before she’d feel good about herself.
“What?” He forced both eyes to focus on her face. “Because I love you. That’s why.”
“But you could have your choice of anyone in the district. Why pick the fat girl?”
Elam adjusted his glasses. Does Elam think he can’t get anyone else because of his eyes?
“I mean, I’m not proposing or anything. I just know how I feel, and maybe next year—”
“Stop.” Becky held up one hand. “Elam, you are right. I do love you.” A smile spread across his face. “But—”
He hung his head. “Not the same way I love you.”
“Right,” she said softly.
“I’m getting my eyes fixed someday soon.”
“Elam, this has nothing to do with your eyes.” Becky spoke as tenderly as she could. “You’re handsome, smart, funny, and would be a great catch.”
Elam grunted. “I don’t know about that.” He stared long and hard at her. “Do you have romantic feelings for someone else?”
She didn’t want to lie, but if she told Elam the truth, she was afraid their friendship would end. And the chances were good that Matt would never ask her out, even if she did get thin.
She must have taken too long to think about it.
“I guess that answers my question. And I’m guessing Matt King holds your heart.”
Becky hung her head. Not only was Elam springing for this expensive meal, but she was also ruining his day. “Why would someone like Matt want me, looking like this?”
It came out all wrong, but she couldn’t take it back now. Elam blinked rapidly, and Becky actually thought he might cry.
“Mei sweet Becky. You are the most beautiful person I know, inside and out. I should not have let you go this long with such low self-confidence. I should have told you more often how pretty you are, how kind you are, what a gut mudder you will be.” He focused hard and stared into her eyes. “But I was always afraid of losing you.”
If Becky had a nickel for every time someone had told her that she had a pretty face, or that she was pretty on the inside . . .
They were both quiet. There really wasn’t anything left to say. And as they sat in the silence, a sadness was burrowing down inside her.
As if she’d just lost her best friend.
Matt fed all the farm animals, including his four new goats, then loaded his tool kit into the buggy. Becky’s father had told him that he would have all the chicken wire onsite when Matt arrived Saturday. He was anxious to get started, for more reasons than one. A couple of women from town ran Byler’s Bakery on Saturday, so the chances were good he might see Becky.
As he headed to the Byler farm, he recalled a conversation he’d had with his mother several years ago. They had been sitting on the couch by themselves—a rarity in a household of nine. She held both his hands in hers and told him, “Matthew, you have a gift, a true blessing from the Lord. You see people for who they really are. You see their souls and identify what it is about them that makes them beautiful. Most of us cannot walk through this life with such pureness of heart.”
Matt couldn’t remember why they’d had that conversation, but he’d always remembered his mother’s words. He wasn’t sure if he had any special gifts or not, but he knew one thing: the beauty of Becky Byler shone through clearly to him.
He had always liked her and wanted to get to know her better, but only recently had she opened up to him a little. Watching her deliver the goats had been the highlight of his week. Maybe his month. Or the whole year. She was so capable and tender and kind.
He was glad to see her sitting in a rocking chair on the front porch when he pulled into her driveway on Saturday morning. Her father was standing next to her.
“I have all the supplies in the barn,” Abram Byler said as he shook Matt’s hand. “I feel like I should be out there helping you, but Sarah has me loaded up on projects around here that are a little easier on the old back.”
“I’m happy to have the work.” Matt glanced around Abram and said hello to Becky.
She crossed the porch and walked down the steps to where Matt and Abram were standing. There was no mistaking how much weight she’d lost. And although her size had never mattered all that much to him before, she was breathtaking now with her big brown eyes, curvaceous figure, and gorgeous smile. He swallowed hard.
“Matt, Mamm said to tell you that we’ll be serving dinner at noon. So please come to the haus and eat with us.”
“Danki, I will.” He had a lunch pail in the front seat of his buggy, but he was sure that a home-cooked meal would be better than the sandwich his mother had sent with him. Especially with Becky sitting across the table from him.
She smiled. “How are my babies?”
“They all seem fine.” He paused. “I’m not sure I’m milking them correctly. I didn’t get as much milk as I thought I would.”
“Just like milking cows,” Abram said. “I guess. That’s what Becky says anyway. Those goats have always been hers. Did you know they all have names?”
Matt grinned. “Ya. She told me that. I can tell she’s fond of them all.”
Becky took a few steps closer. “Did you bring a thermos of cold water? It’s going to get hot out there.”
Matt sighed. “Mamm left one on the counter for me, and I just realized I forgot it.”
“I’ll bring some out to you in a little while.”
“Danki.” He blew out a breath. “Well, I’m going to get to work, then.”
“Holler if you need anything.” Abram took a sip of iced tea. “I’ll be in the barn repairing a chair leg. Then after that, I will start checking off honey-dos on Sarah’s list.” He gave a quick wave as he walked across the yard and toward the barn.
Matt smiled at Becky. “See you in a little while.”
Becky forced herself to wait an hour before she took Matt a jug of cold water. As she made the trek to the fence line, her does followed. Several times she stopped to pet one of them. As she approached, Matt looked up and smiled.
“Here you go.” She handed him the jug.
“Danki.” He took a large gulp, then nodded at the goats. “One, two . . .” He counted sixteen.
“Plus the adult bucks over there.” She pointed to her left.
“That’s cool how they follow you like that.”
“There’s no trick to it. When they see me, they think food.” She laughed. “The fence looks gut.” He’d done quite a bit in the last hour. She wanted her goats to be safe, but she wasn’t anxious for him to finish the job too fast either.
“Who’s that?” Matt pointed to a young buck who was jumping on his mother’s back and trying to keep his balance, then he would fall and roll over.
“Popcorn,” Becky muttered. She avoided Matt’s eyes.
Matt laughed at Popcorn’s continued attempts to ride on his mother’s back. “They’re so playful.”
“Ya, goats are fun. And useful.” She dug her shoes into the thick grass. Staring at the ground, she wiggled her toes inside the leather flats. Even her feet felt thinner. What a miracle she’d been granted.
“Can you hold this?” Matt held up a corner of chicken wire. “I’m having trouble doing this one corner stretch by myself.”
“Sure.” Becky held the wire in place while Matt secured it to the fence. She wanted to stay and help him all day, never take her eyes off of him. Reluctantly, she said, “I better go. See you at noon.”
Her goats followed her all the way across the pasture, making their hungry noises. “I already fed you all,” she said as she closed the gate behind her.
When Becky walked into the house, Lena was sitting on the couch with a coloring book.
“What are you coloring?”
Lena didn’t look up as she pressed down with a red crayon. “A haus.” Sh
e paused and held up the picture for Becky to see. “I want a haus like this when I get married.”
“That’s a big place. And red?”
“It’s brick.”
Becky sat down beside her sister and propped her feet up on the coffee table. “There’s not a lot of houses like that around here. You must be planning on building a brand-new house when you get married. Don’t you want to live in a big farmhouse like this one?”
“I’m not going to be Amish. I’m going to go live in the Englisch world.”
Becky pulled in her feet and sat up straight. “What?”
“You heard me. I’m not going to be baptized when I’m older. I’m going to marry an Englisch man and live in the city.”
Becky forced herself to remain calm. Lena was only ten years old. By the time she was old enough to make those types of decisions, she wouldn’t feel the same way. But her parents would be very upset to hear Lena talk this way.
“Do Mamm and Daed know that you don’t plan to stay in our community?”
Lena stopped coloring and pressed her lips together. “Nee, and don’t tell them.”
“You’ll change your mind.”
“Nee. I won’t. Now, promise.”
Becky wasn’t sure that was a promise she could keep. Lena seemed so sure, so committed.
But she decided to let it go.
For now.
Chapter Seven
Matt prayed silently with Becky’s family, then loaded his plate with meat pie. It was one of his favorite dishes, although his mother rarely made it. She said it was too much work to make enough pies for nine people. Matt loved brown gravy drizzled atop the pie filled with roast and potatoes. He reached for the ladle at the same time Becky did.
“You go ahead,” she said as she pulled her hand back.
He generously poured gravy atop the pie, then took his first bite. “This is great, Sarah.” Matt smiled at Becky’s mother before he scooped more onto his fork.
“Becky gets the credit,” Sarah said. “This was mei mudder’s recipe, and Becky adds her own touches, so I let her make it now.” Sarah smiled. “Besides, I enjoy a break from the kitchen now and then.”
