Phoenix Heart: Episode 1: Ashes
Page 7
I signed to her a second no a little awkwardly as she cinched the last knot around my wrists, and then I made another sign. It’s you, I told her with my hands.
Her face flushed a bright pink. “Don’t say that.”
I reached into my pocket awkwardly, my fingers barely grasping the chain of the medallion before I pulled it out and held it out to her.
She took it uncertainly, frowning.
I made the sign again. It’s you.
At least she should know. Maybe someone else would come for her someday. She should know that they might.
She was shaking, her face bright red and her eyes welling up as she looked at the medallion herself and then jammed it into her apron pocket and crossed her arms over her chest.
“Stop lying to me. This stolen necklace doesn’t prove anything.”
She stomped away, shoulders heaving. She knew, somehow, that I was right. At least I’d warned her. At least she would know.
I looked down at Judicus. He stirred, eyes fluttering open and then closing again.
Maybe I’d get lucky, and he’d wake up in time to fight the raiders.
Or maybe you’ll listen to me! Please, please listen!
I ignored Kazmerev. He needed to go, too. He didn’t have to stay for this.
Aunt Danna cleared her throat. She was standing on a bench, looking over the white-faced townsfolk.
“As much as it pains me, we have to do what’s best for the town,” she said, leveling her gaze at everyone one by one. There were already nods at her words. “We’ll give them my niece Sersha. She’s who they are looking for.”
Every eye turned to me and I felt my face growing hot. Mouths thinned and eyes turned down. They knew it might not be true. They would do it anyway. As long as it wasn’t their family, they didn’t care who was given over. I understood that. And it still cut me to the quick. I’d grown up with these people. I’d helped most of them at some time or another. I had never known any other home.
“Maybe we should look for this thing that they want. Maybe it’s not a person,” someone said. I couldn’t tell who from where I was.
“Do any of you know what it is?” Aunt Danna asked. Her question was met only by silence. “Well, neither do I. So, we can only guess that it’s the one thing that doesn’t belong here.”
There were murmurs, but they were murmurs of agreement. Ice shot through my heart.
“What about the magician?” a woman called – Goodwife Floeiv. “Can we wait for him to wake up again? He could defend us.”
“He’s taken with fever. And we only have an hour,” the head man said grimly. He wouldn’t meet anyone’s eyes. He knew as surely as I did what they would choose to do.
“Why wait for the hour to be up,” Tyndale asked from where he stood, soot-stained, wide shoulders slumped. “We know what we need to do. Call the raiders now and let’s be done with it.”
My aunt Danna’s mouth turned up slightly at the corners and her eyes flashed at his words, but she said nothing. She looked amused. But I knew better. She was angry. It was fine for her to offer me up like a chicken for the pot, but for someone outside the family to do it – well, that bothered her. At least there was that. I almost barked a laugh at such a small blessing.
Even if you are not listening, I will try to tell you. I don’t really know how a Flame Rider accesses my strength, but I know a little. I know it involves embracing the flames around your heart and letting them burn.
“Go ahead and do it, Tyndale,” Aunt Danna said with her slight smile. Irritated, but not likely to stop him. She was treating him with care. She must still be hoping he would marry her daughter and give Mally a good future.
Aunt Danna raised an eyebrow in a superior manner and Tyndale shuffled slightly before squaring his shoulders and pushing through the crowd to the door.
You have to want it, not fight it. You have to open your heart.
The time for opening my heart was almost at an end.
The door swung open and as Tyndale stepped into the night, all I saw through the open door was the blaze of bright feathers.
Please. Please try. Don’t give up.
But everyone else had given up on me. Why fight it? Why push when no one else would push for me?
I will push for you. I should have fought for you from the beginning. Let me fight for you now. Will you not forgive me?
That made my heart come to a stuttering start. Wouldn’t I forgive him? Was I so stingy as to withhold forgiveness from a creature only I could see just to spite him? Was that to be my last act?
I glanced at my cousin and the hard expression on her face. She wouldn’t even look at me. And I knew that under that, she felt guilty that they were going to give me up to the raiders and she wondered if I told her the truth – if maybe I wasn’t being given up to save the town, but rather to save her. And yet, she wouldn’t give me one look of kindness.
I didn’t want to be that way. Not now. Not ever.
Kazmerev shouldn’t even have to ask for forgiveness. I should have offered it openly and from the start.
I was sorry, too.
I opened my heart to him at the same moment that Aunt Danna stepped down from her bench, crossed to me, and grabbed my upper arm in her grip.
I forgave him completely. And I wished him well. Perhaps the next one to lift his ashes from the ground would do right by him. I wanted that for him.
I hoped that in time, he could forgive me, too.
Of course I forgive you, little hawk.
My lips quirked up in a slight smile as Aunt Danna helped me stand.
“It’s for the best, Sersha,” she said, leading me from the chair toward the door.
I paused at the sound of a groan from behind me. Judicus pushed himself up onto all fours, panting hard.
There was nothing he could do to stop this. He was too weak, too hurt. But at least he would live. I’d managed to help him that far.
“She’s here!” Tyndale roared into the night. “Come and get her!”
A cry from down the street answered him and it sounded like triumph.
The blood in my face rushed away leaving me lightheaded. When I’d said I had no future, I’d been right.
Chapter Seventeen
An ache like the beginning of a fire started in my heart, searing through me so painfully that if Aunt Danna wasn’t holding me up, I would have fallen to my knees.
Don’t fight it! Embrace the pain!
I tried to unclench my body, to let my mind absorb the hurt flowing through my chest and heart. It felt like I was on fire. I clenched my jaw against it. How could you not fight pain? How could you not battle against it with every beat of your heart?
For the same reason that you aren’t fighting risk and death. For love. Hold onto me, little hawk. Hold onto me through the pain.
We stepped out the door and into the night, and I don’t know what everyone else saw in the circle of orange light pouring from the door of the inn, but I saw Tyndale shaking and my Aunt Danna’s grim face and a line of dark figures advancing with one hurrying ahead of the rest – but I also saw Kazmerev.
He fluttered down from the inn roof – larger than a huge plow horse – as large as a wagon. And he was fire and embers, falling ash and bright sparks. His eye was fixed on me and when our gazes caught, he burst into brighter flame.
I was wrong to doubt you. Let me stand with you here. Let me shelter you under my wing.
Warmth filled me along with the pain, because even though I couldn’t stop what was coming next, at least I had a friend to go through it with me. And it meant so much to me to know that he was willing to stand here and be with me through the grimmest moment of my life, even though it would cost him in sorrow and pain. I’d watched him mourn Veela. I knew it would hurt him for me to die, too. And yet, here he stood.
I held my head a little higher as the lead raider met Aunt Danna in the stark light of our lanterns. There was a shuffling from behind me as the townspeople st
epped out the door to stand behind us. I risked a look over my shoulder to see Mally step up and wrap a hand around Tyndale’s arm, her barrel stave still in her other hand. Her eyes were red like she’d been crying.
“You have the Ai’sletta?” the lead raider asked.
“What will you do with her?” Aunt Danna said. I wondered if knowing would change her mind about this or if she was just stretching it out to show the raider he didn’t call all the shots here.
“We are the Hand of Rats. Our faces cloaked in the night. Our actions cloaked in secrecy. What we do hereafter is not for you to know.”
“You burned my village,” Aunt Danna said firmly. “You killed my friends. You are taking my niece away. I think you owe me the truth.”
He laughed a dry, ashy laugh. “The Ai’sletta threatens us with light and order. These are two things we cannot abide. We will kill her. But fear not, loving aunt. We shall do it quickly and then we shall be gone.”
So, they did know they were looking for a girl.
Coughing like someone was trying to cough up every breath they’d ever had resounded from behind me and I twisted to look. Judicus clung to the doorframe of the inn, doubled over, his face red as he coughed and coughed. He was pale and sweaty, but his eyes were fixed on Mally, wide and afraid. He knew. He must have seen her birthmark. Would he say something?
Fear tore through me at the thought. If he did, everyone would die. Tyndale and Uncle Llynd would fight to their deaths to defend Mally and everyone else would join them. He must not speak.
Right now, he could not.
“Let’s do this quickly,” the raider said with a sneer, but there was fear in his tone as he drew his sword. I was good at listening. It was what I did best. I could hear what no one else could. He was afraid of Judicus. Afraid he’d recover and stop this before it began.
Aunt Danna’s hand was shaking as she let go of my arm. She met my eyes with steely determination, clearly certain that she would have to force me to walk forward. She was wrong.
I took a step toward the raider on my own.
Kazmerev had said this took love. He wasn’t wrong. I thought of the little ones sleeping upstairs in the inn and I took a second step.
“Why doesn’t she speak?” the raider asked as I took a third step toward him. It was all I could do to keep my knees from trembling.
“She is voiceless.” Was that regret in Aunt Danna’s voice? I would hold on to that. Brave front aside, she was sorry for what she was doing.
I was near enough now to see the glint in the raider’s eyes at her words. Under his veil, he was probably smirking.
“Kneel,” he said aloud.
I knelt on the ground, letting the squelch of the mud remind me that the earth I knelt on was the earth I’d lived on all my life and when this life was gone, it would embrace me.
Draw on the flame, little hawk. It is not too late to soar!
The raider leaned down and whispered to me and I realized with a chill, that he knew he could confess because I could not speak his secrets.
“When I’ve taken your head, I will kill every soul in this village. What a fool you are to come willingly when it will do nothing for your people.”
Fear shot through me. My sacrifice would be for nothing.
Oh. No. That’s too much! Don’t draw that much!
I barely heard Kazmerev. Panic bubbled up inside me. My sacrifice would be for nothing. My family and friends would die anyway. My little cousins and the twins born yesterday and ...
Fire filled my mind, blazed from my heart. I felt my hands pull apart as the bindings around them fell to the ground and I raised a hand at the same moment that the raider lifted his sword above his head in a double-handed grip.
Blazing heat ripped through my body, racing out my hand and scorching through the air with a sound like fabric tearing. It lanced out in an amber streak, shot through his sword, through his arms, and licked across his face. He was a living torch in the blink of an eye, his sword falling to the ground in a splash of molten metal. He opened his mouth and then the fire flashed so bright I couldn’t see and when I looked back there was nothing there but ash.
The street was silent for a heartbeat.
And then a battle cry ripped through every raider throat.
They charged toward me as one.
Chapter Eighteen
I leapt to my feet, hands flung up as if I could ward them off. Could I? My heart was beating so hard that I couldn’t hear anything else. My vision seemed to pulse with black as if fear was robbing me of sight.
When I say jump, jump.
A glint from one of the weapons leveled at me told m I didn’t have time to act.
Jump.
I jumped as high as I could.
My legs felt hot as they were swept out from under me. My breath was in my throat. My eyes were blinded by light. I blinked hard, trying to sit up.
Don’t squirm!
And all I saw was bright flames. Wind whipped past my hair as I realized that I was sitting. I was sitting on the back of a soaring phoenix as he climbed up and up into the air.
He let out a long keen like the cry of an eagle and turned, banking into a wide circle. I should have fallen off. I should have slid through his semi-transparent body of flame. But I didn’t.
And you won’t. The Flame Rider is linked to the phoenix on a life-force level. I will not drop you. I will not leave you. We are bound now by flame and ash. You have formed our bond.
Was he sorry that I did? I felt nervous at the thought.
You ease my pain with your presence. His thoughts were awed. You help temper the agony of my loss. I’ve never done this before. Veela was my only other rider. I’ve never lived through another loss. You ease it in a way I thought was impossible.
Tears pricked my eyes. I hadn’t expected it to feel like this.
I felt ... safe.
And yet I was anything but. I reached out and dug my fingers into his flame, but while there was a sense of resistance, he felt insubstantial. Was he visible now?
You are making me visible.
We swooped down low toward the ground at the same moment that something swiped through the air beside me. A dark arrow ripped past and then another.
I caught a glimpse of my family and friends frozen where they stood, mouths hanging open as they watched Kazmerev careening toward them, flames unfurling at his back.
The raiders reacted with trained precision. They had their bows out and arrows flying immediately.
Kazmerev twisted in the air, avoiding the bolts, and I reached to grab at him by instinct.
I lifted a hand, hoping to shoot fire at the raiders, but nothing happened. I shook my palm and tried again.
Nothing.
My stomach dropped. Was that it? I’d run out of the ability to fight? Then my people were still dead. I’d done nothing to help them!
Calm. You are new at this. It won’t come easy.
They were shooting arrows at us! We couldn’t just accept that! We had to fight.
We were in between them now, soaring just feet over the ground. I covered my face with my arms as Kazmerev flapped, his wings setting the edge of the head man’s house on fire as he swept past. I thought he couldn’t light the buildings! This was getting worse and worse!
I can when you make me visible.
A sword swiped through the air beside us and Kazmerev flapped hard to gain height. We swept up into the air, leaving the raiders in chaos, their faces etched with frustration and anger.
I leaned into his hard climb, realizing finally how high up we were and how easily I could fall.
I won’t let you fall.
Good thing I wasn’t afraid of heights.
We were turning again, but it would be no use unless I could access that fire again. I tried to feel for it in my heart, but all I felt was racing joy and nervous anticipation, pulsing and dancing through me. I was flying. I was up in the air and I was flying.
And someone had
chosen to fly with me.
I told you it was about love. Love of others. Love for your phoenix.
I melted into that sacred feeling, hoping it would be enough. We raced toward the ground and it was all I could do not to close my eyes tight as we hurtled down the street toward where the raiders were regrouping and fitting arrows to bowstrings.
We were out of options. I had to think of something – anything.
An arrow struck me, and I fell forward, eyes closing in pain. I reached for the shaft in my arm at the same moment that Kazmerev seemed to panic within me.
Oh no!
I tumbled down to the ground as he disappeared from under me. The ground rose up and hit me hard. I rolled across it, moaning in pain where the arrow shaft hit the ground.
But I wasn’t worried for myself.
Was he hurt? Was he dead?
I scrambled to my feet, fighting the waves of agonizing pain.
The fire was gone from my heart.
The phoenix was back in the sky but no one was looking up anymore, they were all looking at me.
The nearest raider raised his sword and charged.
I gasped, backing up until my shoulders hit the building wall behind me, but the raider followed, leaping forward, his bright blade crashing in a deadly arc.
It stopped dead. Here it came, the killing blow. I gritted my teeth and tried not to flinch.
And then he was yanked away, pulled across the ground, panic in his wide eyes.
I clutched my throat with one hand, shocked.
A dark rope of magic dragged him, flailing. It was looped around his neck, choking the life out of him.
And just like that, he was gone. They were all gone.
I clutched the wall, panting in fear and exertion.
Across the street from me, Kazmerev lighted on the roof of the inn above the terrified townspeople frozen in fear.
It was a good first ride.
I swallowed, looking around. Every raider lay dead where he had stood only moments before and in the doorway of the inn, Judicus lowered his hand.
“I think that before I pass out again,” he said calmly. “I should tell you all three things. First, the Flame Rider is not the chosen one. She is merely a very gifted person who has been claimed by a phoenix. Please don’t give her to the Hand of Rats while I’m unconscious. Second, the Ai’sletta is among you – the chosen one prophesied of old. She’s that comely barmaid with the curling dark hair who likes to dump me behind the bar like a sack of potatoes. And third, if you try to kill me, the ai’sletta, or my new Flame Rider again, I will have you all fed to the drakkon alive. And now I think I shall pass out again.”