These Are My Confessions

by Robinson, Cheryl; Smith, Meta; King, Joy; Parks, Electa Rome

  When Sasha woke up, the first thing she did was take out the dress she was wearing to the party that night. She couldn’t help but admire the ocean blue Stella McCartney creation, which guaranteed that she would be the baddest chick at the entire affair. The plunging neckline highlighted her surgically enhanced bodice, and with the blinged-out hello kitty necklace dangling down her chest, all eyes would be on her. As she continued to look over her ensemble, she couldn’t believe how far she’d come. A few years ago she had been waiting tables at a diner in a two-bit town in Indiana, and now she was luxuriating in Glen Goodman’s mansion and escorting him to an NBA championship party, wearing a dress by a top notch designer, with diamonds decorating her body. Nobody would believe her success. Hitchhiking out of Indiana was the best move she’d ever made.

  Once Sasha had arrived in Michigan, she immediately hooked up at Platinum, one of the ritziest strip clubs in Detroit. Soon, she was the most sought after exotic dancer in the club, especially after she got her breast enlargement. The fast cash, and parlaying with the city’s biggest ballers, introduced her to the lifestyle she’d always wanted to live. But it wasn’t until she met Glen Goodman that things really started looking up for her. While on vacation with another dancer in Miami, she ran into Glen because they were staying at the same hotel when he was in town for a game. In her juicy couture jogging suit and bouncy ponytail, Glen thought Sasha was a sweet girl in town for some fun, and she played that role to a hilt. She told Glen she was a college student, and never mentioned her full-time position as the reigning queen of the stripper pole. With Sasha playing the good girl role, they had been dating ever since.

  “Baby, what time are we leaving tonight?” she asked when Glen came out the shower.

  “Around eight.”

  “Is it just going to be me and you or are some of your teammates riding with us too?”

  “Nobody else is coming with us, except for maybe Bianca. I have to call her to find out,” Glen said while putting on his clothes.

  “Bianca’s coming to the party?” Sasha asked with astonishment in her voice.

  “Of course, she does work with me.”

  “I don’t know why you keep her around, she is so annoying. I just knew you were going to fire her ass after she tried to get fly with you.”

  “You talking about that discussion we had yesterday about Isaac and Tracy?”

  “Hello, yes.”

  “That was nothing. Bianca has the right to express her opinion, and I actually appreciated her keeping it real with me. She had some very valid points.”

  Sasha couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Glen could be such a hothead, and never liked anyone to step out of line with him, but he was standing there defending little miss goody two shoes. She wanted to vomit. “If you say so,” she said.

  “I have to run some errands. I’ll be back a little later, and then we can head to the party.” Glen kissed Sasha good-bye as he walked out, then she sat down on the bed and thought about how miserable she would be if Bianca rode with them to the party that night. The idea of hanging with Bianca made her think about Tracy, and she wondered if Tracy had made up with Isaac yet. She’d tried calling her a few times yesterday, but Tracy didn’t pick up. She decided to try again.

  Ring ring ring…

  “Hello.”

  “Hey girl,” Sasha said, trying to sound upbeat.

  “What do you want, Sasha?”

  “Why you say it like that? I know you not mad at me because of that shit that went down with Isaac.”

  “Answer this question and I’ll let you know. If I hadn’t caught Isaac with that stripper bitch, would you have told me he spent the night with her?”

  Sasha thought for a moment about what she should say before answering the question. “You my girl, of course I would’ve let you know. I even told Glen that night it was fucked up he was letting Isaac bring that trick up in our crib. I didn’t want that bitch nowhere around me, but you know how these dudes are, they always stick together.”

  It was a lie. In fact, she’d played a subtle role in what transpired. She’d noticed the cheerleader stripper giving Isaac a lap dance, and afterward became chummy with her, and actually told the girl if she wanted to make some real money she should try and spend the night with Isaac. The stripper took the suggestion to heart and flirted with Isaac for the duration of the night. She promised him a sexual experience of a lifetime if he took her home. Three bottles of bubbly later, they were off to Glen’s house, twisting each other out. Sasha never thought Tracy would bust Isaac. She’d only played a role in orchestrating the sexual tryst for her own self-pleasure, since earlier that evening Tracy had acted as if she had Isaac securely in her back pocket, and Sasha wanted to prove that she didn’t.

  “I appreciate that, Sasha,” Tracy said. “I can’t even believe Glen let that bullshit go down in his crib. He could’ve at least told Isaac to get his own damn hotel room. But he don’t give a fuck about me. All he cares about is trifling ass Isaac.”

  “I guess that means you and Isaac haven’t made up?”

  “Hell no. I’m done with him.”

  “So where are you staying?”

  “Thank goodness my cousin lives in Atlanta. She has a two bedroom, so I’m staying in the guest room.”

  “So what are you going to do, stay in your cousin’s crib forever?”

  “What the fuck am I supposed to do? Take Isaac no good ass back so he can continue to cheat on me and think I’ll sit around and take it?”

  Sasha thought Tracy should do just that. She didn’t think Tracy was the flyest chick, and it would be damn near impossible for her to land somebody better than Isaac. Tracy had put mad years in with him. Why let some other girl slide in and reap all the benefits, because they would be flocking to him like bees to honey.

  “It’s up to you what you want to do,” she said. “But all I’m saying is that you been dealing with the cat for a long time. How are you going to go from living with this dude to bunking at your cousin’s crib? I guess the next thing you’re going to tell me is that you’re going to apply for a job and work for a living.”

  “I do have a degree, Sasha, so I can get a job and take care of myself.”

  “If you say so, booboo. But listen, I have some errands to run before going to this party tonight.”

  “What party?”

  “You know, the NBA championship party that Glen is hosting.”

  “Oh yeah, I forgot about that. I’m sure Isaac will be there.”

  “I’m sure he will be too. If he brings a date, would you like me to tell you?”

  “No thanks, because if he does have a date, she must not be keeping him too entertained since he’s been blowing up my phone.”

  “Oh, so you’ve talked to Isaac?” Sasha was itching to know.

  “Nope. I said he called, doesn’t mean I answered.”

  “Whatever works for you. But yeah, like I was saying, I must be going. I’ll definitely be in touch, though.”

  “Okay, have fun,” Tracy said dryly before hanging up.

  It was two hours before the party, and Bianca was completely nervous. She and Aunt Pearl had spent all day yesterday preparing for the evening’s gala, and she’d just gotten back from having her hair and makeup done. When Bianca looked in the mirror, she couldn’t believe the reflection staring back at her. It was a transformation she wasn’t prepared for. She was gently touching her face, in awe of her newfound beauty, and was jolted out of her trance when the phone rang.

  “Hello.”

  “Hi, there.”

  “Glen, how are you,” Bianca chimed, pleasantly surprised to hear his voice.

  “I’m good. So what time do you want me to pick you up?”

  “Excuse me?”

  “For the party tonight, I know you didn’t change your mind?”

  “Oh no, I’m definitely coming, but I don’t need a ride, I’ll meet you there.”

  “Are you sure? I have no problem picking you up
. As a matter of fact, I would prefer it so I would know for sure you were showing up.”

  “No, I don’t need a ride, and yes, I’m showing up.”

  “You promise?”

  “I promise.”

  “Wonderful, I look forward to seeing you. Oh, and don’t forget to save me a dance.”

  “I will.”

  Glen looked down at his cell after hanging up with Bianca. He felt excited about seeing her. He wished that Bianca was his date instead of Sasha. Although he cared about Sasha, being with her on an everyday basis made him realize that though her outer package was appealing, there was not a lot to be desired on the inside. He recalled that when he met her she’d said she was a college student, but since moving in with him, he had never even seen her with a book, let alone studying. He’d offered to pay her college tuition, but she said she had grown tired of school and was trying to figure out what she wanted to do with her life. Glen had all the money in the world, but he still wanted his woman to have a life outside of his, and Sasha showed no interest in that. Lately, he’d begun to realize that there was more to a relationship than beauty. Without mutual goals and things in common, how could it last?

  When he arrived home, he headed straight to the bedroom. Sasha was stepping out of the shower, still dripping wet.

  “Hi, Daddy, I’ve been missing you all day,” she confessed as she dropped her towel. Glen couldn’t lie; Sasha’s body was flawless. She didn’t even have any scars from her breast implants, which were remarkable, but he wasn’t interested in having sex with her before leaving for the party. He still had Bianca on his mind, and that erased the temptation dangling before him.

  “I really need to get in the shower,” he said. “I don’t want us to be late for the party.”

  “Baby, we have time. Lie down and let me give you something to think about until we get back home tonight,” Sasha said, licking her lips seductively. Normally, that would be enough for Glen to step out of his pants and give Sasha what she wanted, but things felt different now, and he knew it was his newfound feelings for Bianca.

  “Not now, Sasha. Get dressed, we have plenty of time later on for that,” he said as he marched passed her.

  “Good idea. I need to preserve my sexy for tonight’s event,” Sasha said, walking into the bedroom-sized closet.

  By the time Glen and Sasha arrived at the Ritz-Carlton, the gala was in full swing. To Sasha, it seemed that every rapper, athlete, bigwig politician, and entertainment celebrity was blessing the spot. She did a precise inspection of every chick in the ballroom, and none of them came close to taking her shine away. Her Stella dress was emphasizing every curve just right, so she didn’t understand why Glen had been so standoffish in the car. Normally his hands would have been preying on every part of her body, but tonight he seemed to be in another world.

  “What’s up?” Isaac said, walking up behind Sasha and Glen. When they turned around, Sasha was stunned to see that Isaac had brought the cheerleader stripper as his date.

  “Damn, that bitch must let him bust off in her mouth and swallow too,” Sasha reasoned, wondering what other reason Isaac would have for keeping her around like she was an official chick.

  “Good to see you man,” Glen said, giving Isaac a pound.

  “Hi,” Sasha said in a chipper voice to Isaac’s date. “I’m sorry I never got the name you use outside of Magic City. I only know you as Passion, but that couldn’t possibly be your government name.”

  “No problem, it’s Penelope. Nice to see you again, but thank goodness under different circumstances.”

  Sasha replied by giving Penelope a stiff smile. Then out of the blue the whole room transfixed their stares in one direction, and Sasha looked that way too, dying to know what had everybody’s undivided attention.

  “Who in the world is that?” Isaac asked, being the first in their crew to zoom in on the woman who had mesmerized the room. The gorgeous goddess in a champagne-colored dress glided down the long staircase leading to the center of the ballroom, her long black tousled hair bouncing with each step she took. Her skin was luminous against the silk that draped her statuette body. Sasha studied the woman from the drop emeralds that sparkled in her ears to the diamond-studded Jimmy Choo heels that adorned her feet and had to admit that the lovely specimen was hands down the fiercest chick in the entire room. She hoped that at any moment her date would be at her side, so her man and every other one could stop drooling.

  “I think I’m in love,” Glen said under his breath, but Isaac heard him.

  “You and me both. Who do you think she’s here with?”

  “I have no idea, but whoever he is, I take my hat off to him.”

  When the unknown woman reached the bottom stair and made her way through the crowd, every man turned to say hello. Sasha became jittery when it seemed the woman was making a beeline in their direction. It wasn’t until the lady got within touching distance that she realized who the dream girl was, and her stomach instantly tightened up in knots.

  “Hi, Glen.”

  “Bianca?” Glen said, as more of a question than a greeting.

  “Of course it’s me silly.”

  “Bianca, your assistant?” Isaac asked, not believing his eyes.

  “You can’t be the same girl that put me in the taxi the other day,” Penelope said.

  “To answer both of your questions, yes, I’m that girl. It’s amazing what a dress and some makeup can do right. I can’t believe all the glares and stares I’m getting.” She giggled.

  “You look absolutely incredible. I didn’t even recognize you,” Glen admitted.

  “I don’t know if I should take that as a compliment or be offended,” Bianca said with a smile.

  “Hi, Bianca. You look lovely tonight,” Sasha said, stepping forward and standing between Bianca and Glen.

  “Thanks, I guess I didn’t need to take you up on your offer for styling tips.”

  Sasha felt her face turn red after the stinging remark. She didn’t know how to respond, so she remained mute. Just when she believed her tension level had reached its limit, one of Glen’s teammates approached and asked Bianca to dance.

  “She’d love to,” Sasha answered quickly, trying to get rid of the woman she never thought she’d consider competition.

  The teammate took Bianca’s hand and led her to the dance floor, as Glen watched with fire in his eyes.

  “Why the fuck did you do that?” Glen asked.

  “Do what?”

  “Put Bianca off on some stranger?”

  “Excuse me, Charlie isn’t a stranger, he’s your teammate, remember?”

  “Still, Bianca doesn’t know Charlie. How do you know she wanted to dance with him?”

  “I didn’t see her putting up a fight. The only person that seems to have a problem with it is you. Why is that?”

  “I don’t have a problem with it. I’m fine. Excuse me for a minute, I need to go speak to the coach.” Sasha turned to where Bianca and Charlie were dancing and was once again astonished that the woman who’d been in their foyer yesterday was the same showstopper who was here tonight. She’d always known that Bianca had potential under those baggy clothes and the plain Jane face, but never did she imagine that Bianca had all that going on.

  “Isaac and I are going to dance, you should find Glen and join us,” Penelope suggested.

  “You two go ahead, we’ll join you shortly.”

  Sasha turned her attention back to Bianca and decided she’d take Penelope’s advice. She tracked Glen down at a table, talking to his coach, and lured him to the floor. They slow jammed to an oldie but goody by Jodeci, and as they did, Glen sneaked looks at Bianca and Charlie. It incensed him that his teammate had his arms around Bianca’s waist as if they were a couple.

  Midway through the song, Sasha couldn’t hold her bladder any longer. “Baby, I’ll be right back. I have to use the restroom.”

  “Go ahead. I’ll be sitting down at our table waiting for you.”

 
“Okay,” Sasha said, and gave Glen a kiss on the lips. Then she hurried away, not wanting to leave him by himself for too long.

  Once she disappeared, Glen wasted no time getting to Bianca. “Excuse me, Charlie, but I need to speak to my assistant.”

  Charlie eyed Bianca, hoping to catch some resistance and not wanting to leave the woman’s side, but when she didn’t object, he bowed out gracefully.

  The second Glen’s hands touched her skin, Bianca felt butterflies in her stomach. “So what is it you need to talk to me about?”

  “I don’t have time to engage in word games since Sasha will be coming back any minute, but I had to tell you that I think I’m falling in love with you.”

  Bianca’s heart felt like it leaped out her chest. That was one confession she didn’t expect Glen to make. She was speechless.

  “You’ve been so heavy on my mind, and then when you showed up here tonight, I could no longer deny how strong my feelings are for you.”

  “What about Sasha?”

  “It’s hard to let someone go when you allow them to get so close. But I do know I don’t want to be with Sasha, I want to be with you.”

  “Are you sure you’re not just overwhelmed from seeing me in a decent outfit?” Bianca joked.

  “I’ve already seen you at your best, naked.” Bianca couldn’t help but blush. “I want to sit down and really talk to you about how I feel. Do you mind making an early exit?”

  “Not at all.”

  “Then let’s go,” Glen said as he took Bianca’s hand and led the way.

  “Are you okay?” Isaac asked, startling Sasha. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you, but I noticed that you seemed a little out of it.”

  “It’s that obvious?” Sasha replied angrily, fidgeting with her hair. “I went to the bathroom and when I came out I spotted Glen dancing up close and personal with Bianca. By the time I torpedoed through this crowd, the two of them were ghosts. Have you seen Glen?”