Lynn Ames - Beyond Instinct

by Lynn Ames

  Sage brushed her fingers over the back of Vaughn’s hand, moved a lock of her hair, and then rearranged the blankets. Although Vaughn stirred, she did not wake. The doctor finally removed her from the ventilator several hours ago and, after she struggled briefly to get air, her breathing stabilized. The effort sapped what little energy she had, and Sage was happy to see her resting comfortably.

  Vaughn looked so much younger when she slept—so much more at peace. Whatever demons haunted her, and Sage suspected there were many, they appeared to be sleeping too.

  Vaughn was such a complex woman. Sage wished, yet again, that they’d had more time to get to know each other under different circumstances.

  “Who are you really, Vaughn Elliott?”

  “I’m exactly who I said I was when we first met,” Vaughn answered, her voice hoarse from disuse, her eyes still shut.

  “Oh. You’re awake.”

  “Barely.”

  “How do you feel? Can I get you anything?” Sage knew she sounded nervous, and she was. Had Vaughn felt her fussing? Would she have minded? She realized with a shock that this was the first time they’d been alone together and not in immediate danger since the night of passion they’d shared in her house. It seemed like a lifetime ago.

  “I’m fine, thanks.”

  “Vaughn, I never had a chance… That is to say… I…” Sage threw her hands up in the air. Vaughn was staring at her now, an inscrutable expression in her eyes.

  “Sage, it’s fine. I’m on my way to a full recovery. This is not on your conscience. I made my own choices every step of the way.”

  A ball of anger rose from Sage’s stomach and settled in her throat. “That’s it? What, like maybe you decided to be chivalrous and lay your coat in a puddle so I wouldn’t get my shoes wet?”

  “Sage—”

  “You could’ve died. Hell, you did die, probably more than once before Justine and the doctor saved you. And for what? For me? Why? Why?”

  The anger turned to tears as Sage continued. “I don’t even know why any of it happened in the first place. I don’t know why I was taken, I don’t know why people wanted to kill me. What was the point? And why are they still trying to find me? I’m just a stupid civil servant.”

  Sage knew she sounded hysterical, but she couldn’t stop herself. “Until I met you, I led an incredibly boring life. Next thing I know, I’m having mind-blowing sex with a gorgeous woman, who, by the way, I think I may be in love with, and being kidnapped by restless natives who want me dead.”

  Sage finally took a deep breath. Her cheeks blushed bright red when she realized what she’d just said. “I-I’m sorry. I don’t know where all that came from. I’ll just—”

  “Sage. Stop. Sit here.” Vaughn patted the bed as she gingerly shifted to make room.

  With as much dignity as she could muster, Sage sat on the edge of the bed. She was surprised when Vaughn reached for her hand. The look in her eyes was one of…amusement?

  “Now you think I’m a complete joke.”

  Vaughn lifted a finger to Sage’s lips. “Not at all. I think you’ve been through a very traumatic experience, and your reaction is perfectly understandable. I don’t know what interest these people have in you either, but together we’ll figure it out. In the meantime, we need to keep you safe.” She trailed her fingers across Sage’s knuckles, and Sage felt her heart rate increase. “As for the rest, you can’t think you love me. I’m not the kind of person who deserves the love of a beautiful, innocent woman like you.”

  Although Vaughn said the words gently, softly, Sage’s heart constricted and momentarily robbed her of breath.

  “I don’t know what happened in your life before, that’s true,” Sage said. “And I readily admit, I’ve never seen anyone who can handle a gun the way you can. For a while there, I thought I was in the middle of The Bourne Ultimatum.”

  Vaughn’s laughter morphed into a bout of coughing. She winced and swore. Sage propped her up higher in the bed.

  “But please, don’t tell me I don’t know my own heart.”

  “Fair enough. I don’t want to hurt you, Sage. You are a very desirable woman, and I couldn’t have helped myself if I’d wanted to.”

  Sage started to open her mouth, but Vaughn silenced her once again with several fingers over her mouth. “Nor do I regret what happened between us, unless in some way that was responsible for what happened afterward. But it was a mistake.”

  Sage’s heart shattered. “I see.”

  “No, I don’t think you do. Sage, you’ve seen what I can do. This is the world I live in. It’s no place for someone like you. You’re so much better than that.”

  “Better than you, you mean?”

  “Yes.” Vaughn’s hand dropped back to her side.

  “Sorry, but I don’t see it that way. I don’t know anybody else who would track me to the middle of nowhere, intentionally put herself in harm’s way, take a bullet for me, or kill so that I might live. You’re right—that’s not within my normal frame of reference, but then, I’m pretty sure that’s true for most of humanity.” Sage stood up and paced to the foot of the bed. “Why is it that you can’t accept that you’re a good person?”

  “Because I’m not,” Vaughn said simply.

  “You’re wrong, and somewhere inside, you know that. I don’t know what it is you feel so guilty about, but whatever it is, you need to let it go or you’ll never be able to live. I can’t help how I feel about you, Vaughn, and I won’t apologize for it either.” Sage stormed out of the room.

  Justine stood by as the doctor examined Vaughn. She’d seen Sage run out of the room in tears a few minutes ago. If she hadn’t stopped her, Sage would have run right out the front door. As it was, Sage went into the room where a bed had been set up for her and slammed the door. When the doctor was done with Vaughn, Justine would find out what happened.

  “Everything’s looking good,” the doctor said. “If this continues, we should be able to remove the chest tube in a few days.”

  “Doctor—” Vaughn said.

  “I know, I know, you are in a big hurry to be on your way. If we don’t take proper care of you now, you’ll be in a big hurry for your own funeral. I am not sure you fully appreciate the severity and delicacy of your condition.”

  Justine watched Vaughn clamp down on her frustration. “I’ll give you two more days.”

  “What you mean is that you will give yourself two more days,” the doctor said, completely unaffected and definitely not intimidated. He draped the stethoscope around his neck and left the room.

  “I think he’s got your number,” Justine said when Vaughn growled.

  “We’re wasting time.”

  “Getting you healthy is hardly a waste of time, and as long as you’re already in a lather, what happened with Sage?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “She ran out of here crying. If I hadn’t stopped her, she would’ve run out the door and kept going.”

  “Great.” Vaughn pressed her head back into the pillows.

  “Well? What was it all about?”

  “That’s between me and Sage.”

  “Vaughn, I don’t want to pry, and I know whatever that was is between the two of you, but there are a few things you don’t know that you should.”

  “Such as?”

  Vaughn’s seeming indifference raised Justine’s ire. “Let’s start with the fact that Sage has spent every night sleeping in one of these chairs, holding your hand. She hasn’t left your side except to eat and go to the bathroom. It was all I could do to get her to walk down the hall so the doctor could check her stitches and put her in a proper sling.”

  Justine walked closer until she was standing directly over Vaughn. “I know you’re still hurting over Sara…” She watched the flicker of pain cross her face before Vaughn was able to hide it. “But Sage is not Sara, and you can’t push her away because you’ve got some misguided notion that you’re the plague where women are concerned.”

/>   Vaughn’s cheeks flushed. “Who are you to tell me what I am? I live every day knowing that I got Sara killed. She was so young, so innocent. If I hadn’t said yes to Fairhaven when he came to recruit us in college, Sara would still be alive.” Vaughn blinked hard as moisture pooled on her lashes. “She never should have become an agent. She was just like Sage—optimistic, lovely, fresh, innocent, and in love with me. I won’t corrupt someone else. I can’t.” Vaughn’s voice broke.

  Justine put a hand on Vaughn’s leg. “I’ll say it again—Sage isn’t Sara. She isn’t about to run off and join the CIA and, for the record, Sara loved being an agent. She wouldn’t have chosen any other life, so stop thinking you were all-powerful enough to change the course of her existence. She was an adult just like you, and she made her own decision for her own reasons, not all of which had to do with you, as she told me.”

  “Is that so?”

  “Yes, that’s so. You’re right about one thing, though—Sage is a lovely woman. So are you, if only you’d get your head out of your ass long enough to realize it. You’ve punished yourself long enough, Vaughn. It’s time to live, before it’s too late.”

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  Edgar Fairhaven and Brian Pordras were playing their weekly racquetball game. “They’ve gone underground,” Fairhaven said, his chest heaving, his T-shirt stained with sweat.

  “How do you know?” Pordras was also breathing heavily from exertion.

  “There’s no sign of them having used a car or plane to get out, and my man has checked every hospital and clinic in the country.”

  “Maybe they’re all dead.”

  “That would be nice but highly improbable. We have to assume they’re all alive and in play, and that they’ve got enough information to figure it out.”

  The secretary stopped mid-stride and the ball hit him in the gut. “What do you mean, ‘figure it out?’ As in, implicate you and me?”

  “Yes. I think we have to assume that’s true. Hence the reason we have to find them.”

  “Ed, we can’t go through with the plan. If we don’t, they can’t prove anything. There won’t be any—”

  “Get a grip. This isn’t just about things that haven’t happened yet.” Fairhaven waited for his words to sink in.

  “You said they would never… You promised they couldn’t…” Pordras sagged against the wall, his head in his hands, the racquet dangling from his wrist by its safety strap.

  “Relax. If they had connected all the dots, they wouldn’t be underground in some third world country—they already would have come for us.”

  “That’s a comforting thought,” Pordras said sarcastically.

  “It means time is still on our side. We’ll find them before they leave Mauritania, determine what they know and whom they’ve told, and eliminate them.”

  “We’re running out of time. We need to think about altering the plan.”

  “If we haven’t found them in the next day or two, we’ll talk about that.”

  “You promised me it would be over in forty-eight hours. That was three days ago.”

  “It will be over soon, Bri. Now play the game.” Fairhaven served the ball.

  Vaughn sat hunched over on the edge of the bed waiting for Justine to come back with Nate. Her chest hurt and her side ached where the chest tube had been removed several hours ago. She was unable to sit up straight or take a deep breath, but none of that mattered to her. Every day that they stayed endangered Nate and the doctor.

  “You look much improved,” Nate said when he entered the room.

  “It’s good not to be tied to this bed…that’s for sure. It’s time to talk about an exit strategy.”

  Justine shook her head. “Vaughn, you’re still not strong enough—”

  Vaughn pierced Justine with her eyes. “You and I both know it could be weeks before I’m sound. We don’t have that kind of time.” She paused to catch her breath. “I think Switzerland is a good option. It’s not a destination they’d be expecting, which may help us stay undetected. Also, they’re not as stringent with security for private planes as London or Paris would be.”

  “Agreed,” Justine said. “I’ve got some good contacts in Zurich who could meet us at the airport and arrange a place for us.”

  “Good. Can they help us doctor the flight plan?”

  “What flight plan?” Justine said, smiling.

  “Excellent. I’m sure it’s not everyday that private jets arrive there from Mauritania. How’s our pilot doing?”

  “He is well-rested and ready to go,” Nate said.

  “He understands that the $20,000 ensures his silence?” Vaughn asked.

  “I have spoken to him myself,” Nate answered. “He is what you would call a mercenary. Since you are paying him, his loyalty is with you. Also, although he does not know the nature of your business and who you are running from, he does not like that they would shoot women.”

  “Well, that’s in our favor,” Justine said. “I don’t want to ask how he did it, but Sabastien assures me that $10,000 in untraceable bills will be in the cockpit, waiting for the pilot. My friends will have the other $10,000 waiting once we’re safely on the ground in Zurich.”

  “I should call Sabastien,” Vaughn said.

  “Yes, he’s been very worried about you.”

  “If we can smuggle him in, we could use his help on the ground. I don’t suppose you know where he is?”

  “I haven’t asked, and he hasn’t told.”

  “All right, we’ll take care of that later. Nate, when’s the best time for us to take off?”

  “The plane is fueled and ready to go. The man who is looking for you is expecting something under cover of darkness.”

  “You sound awfully certain of that. You met with him?”

  “This morning. As chief of police here in Mauritania, it is natural that he should seek me out and enlist my help in locating these three very dangerous women who are in my country illegally,” Nate said, keeping a straight face.

  “Three?” Vaughn asked, her eyes going wide.

  “Yes, he showed me pictures. I have to say they were not very flattering.”

  “Shit. I’m sorry,” Vaughn said to Justine. If they’d identified her, Justine’s career in the Company likely would be over. “None of this was supposed to happen. You were supposed to be in and out with no one the wiser.”

  “You and I both know things seldom go as planned.” Justine shrugged. “I wasn’t having all that much fun anymore. Change is good.”

  Vaughn addressed Nate, “Did the man introduce himself?”

  “He said he was Arthur Sielig from the United States State Department.”

  “Sielig?” Justine asked. “He’s Fairhaven’s top henchman.”

  “That makes sense,” Vaughn said. She turned her attention back to Nate. “State Department, huh? That’s interesting. What did you tell him?”

  “I thanked him for bringing the issue to my attention, assured him that I had neither seen nor heard of a Vaughn Elliott, Justine Coulter, or Sage McNally, but that if I did, I would notify him right away.”

  “Well done.”

  “Also, he asked me to have my men stationed at every airport and border crossing, and to distribute your pictures so that we were familiar with what you looked like. He indicated that he thought at least one of you might be injured.”

  “An instruction I’m sure you followed,” Justine said.

  “Of course. I distributed your pictures at every border crossing. I haven’t gotten to the airports yet because I’ve been so busy, but I’m sure I’ll get to it in the next day or two.”

  “Yes, I’m sure you will,” Vaughn said. “You know the layout. How should we do this?”

  “Better to leave in the middle of the day,” Nate said. “I could arrange it so that several private planes take off in quick succession. None of them will have filed a flight plan—after all, we third world countries are so backward and lax about things like paperwork.” Nat
e winked.

  “Sounds good, but that still leaves the issue of us getting to the plane without detection.”

  “I think I might need to meet with Mr. Sielig at around that time. You know, update him on what I have done, how I have beefed up security to ensure that you cannot get away.”

  “Nate, I don’t want to put you in jeopardy. Sielig is a very dangerous man,” Vaughn said.

  “I am not concerned. I will bring in the head of several hospitals to testify that he has never seen any of you. I can make the meeting last for at least an hour or longer. By that time, you will be in the air and safely on your way.”

  “He’ll figure it out, Nate,” Justine said. “There’s no need to put yourself in danger.”

  “I made a promise to Jackson. I owe this to him—and I have to admit, I like all of you a great deal. Do not worry about me. I can take care of myself.”

  “Okay, it’s settled then. We leave tomorrow.”

  “I will make the preparations,” Nate said, taking his leave.

  “Have you seen Sage?” Vaughn asked Justine when they were alone. “We should meet and try to figure out what started all of this.” She hoped her voice sounded casual. She hadn’t seen Sage in twenty-four hours and she missed her; she missed holding her hand or just having her nearby, but Justine didn’t need to know that.

  “No. She’s been closed up in her room since your little chat yesterday.”

  Vaughn frowned but said nothing.

  “You know you shouldn’t be flying yet. It’s too risky.”

  Vaughn sighed. “I know. But we can’t put it off any longer. I can use the oxygen if need be, and we’ll take supplies with us.”

  “I’m not happy.”

  “I’m sure you’re not, but it’s a risk we have to take.”

  “I’ll go talk to the pilot,” Justine said, conceding that this was an argument she wouldn’t win.

  “Hey,” Vaughn said, peeking her head into Sage’s room. Sage was lying on the bed with her good arm behind her head. She barely acknowledged Vaughn’s presence. “Can I come in?”