“No, I’m sorry. Here I am going on about my life—”
“I want you to go on about your life, Gabriel. I love you and I want to know everything about you.”
Gabriel picked up my hand and kissed the back of it. “You’re so sweet. I love you too. Still, it feels a bit poor little rich boy if you know what I mean.”
“Why? You’re rich but you’re a man and not little. Only 33% is true. So there.” I was hoping to coax a smile out of him but failed.
“I’m going on and on about my bastard of a father and you never even knew yours. It’s pretty damned insensitive of me.”
He’s the sweet one. Really.
“Gabriel, please don’t take this the wrong way but I’d rather have had no father than have a bad one.”
There’s my smile. Finally!
“I hear that, sister. No truer words have been spoken.”
We sat in companionable silence before I ventured to ask, “Is that why you were conflicted about your needs and me? You thought you were being like your father?”
“I just love how you call it my ‘needs.’ It’s so polite. ‘Darling, I feel an onset of my needs coming on. Would you be a dear and let me tie you up and perform wicked congress on you?’”
“Gabriel…”
He caressed my cheek. “I love to tease you pink, Emma. You’re still so innocent and all the more adorable because of it. How do you manage to still be this way?”
Because time stopped for me when I left you.
“Don’t think I didn’t notice how you avoided my question.”
Gabriel snapped his fingers. “Damn! I thought I had pulled the blindfold over your eyes.”
“Wool.”
“No, sweetheart.”
“Oh!” His wicked grin sent a tingle straight to my core. “I know you’re loving this—”
“More than words can say.”
“But…”
“But Emma wants answers or her beautiful mind will seize.” Gabriel pressed down on the gas and passed a 70s era lime-green Cadillac convertible. “Say, I’ve always wanted a car like that, Emma. What do say if I buy it off of him? Or we can trade the Mercedes for it. You think he’d take it?”
“It’s probably his grandma’s and how are you a billionaire again?”
“I’m a freak of nature like that.”
I shook my head. Gabriel didn’t want to answer the question and that was more than okay with me. So I asked another one instead.
“How does your uncle fit into all of this?”
“That’s less complicated to explain. Lucas was there for me. When my father knocked me across the room and told me I should’ve never been born, I could go see Uncle Lucas and pretend he was my real father. It was a nice fantasy for a while because they were twins—even though I could easily tell the difference between them because of their eyes.”
“Were they different colors?”
“No. Lucas looked like he loved me and my father looked like he hated me.”
Pain rolled through me. I couldn’t imagine my mother hating me, so knowing Gabriel suffered it his whole childhood—I nearly felt sick with sadness. I wanted to hug him, to do anything I could to take the pain away.
“Does your uncle have any children?”
“None.”
“So you’re a bit more than his nephew, right?”
He glanced at me before looking back at the road. “What do you mean?”
I wasn’t going to look deeper into Gabriel’s wary reaction. “From what you’ve told me, you’re like a son to him too.”
“You could say that,” he shrugged. “Lucas never made excuses for my father’s behavior, but he always told me it wasn’t my fault and I was going to grow up to be a better man than both of them. During my darkest days, back when I was going straight into self-destruct, those were the only good words I remembered.”
I sat up, feeling my heart pound with realization that I couldn’t deny. “You really love him.”
The tight set of Gabriel’s mouth along with his clipped nod communicated just how close to the emotional edge he was.
“But you were so cold to him at the ballet. I thought you couldn’t stand him.”
“No, not all.”
“Then why did you act like that?”
“Because I knew who he was there with and I was pissed because of it. I asked him not to do it and he still did it anyways.”
“Lucas told you ahead of time he’d be there with Embry’s family?”
“Yeah, he did. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, but I didn’t think he’d show up at our box.”
Even I could tell Lucas Gordon was the kind of man to do exactly what he pleased, regardless of how it’d affect others.
Shit, shit, shit! Don’t tell me I’ve just made things worse for him by bringing all this up about Lucas and Embry.
“Stop.”
“What?”
“Stop blaming yourself.” A ghost of a smirk touched his lips. “And before you ask—I know you, remember? Everything in the world is always your fault.”
“Not everything, just most things.”
“I hate to break it to you, baby, but you’re wrong.”
I stuck my tongue out at him. “I still have to say it though.”
Gabriel let out a lengthy sigh and waved his hand. “Go on, my love. Unburden your overworked conscience and pay your penance so you may find peace.”
“I’m sorry for saying anything that might end up causing problems between you and your uncle.”
“Baby, any problems that crop up are the ones he started. Besides, once Lucas really gets to know you he’ll understand why I love you so much. When it comes down to it he’s always wanted my happiness. He’ll see how much you make me happy.”
Jittery and less confident about it than Gabriel was, I managed to put faith in his hope. I kissed his cheek. “All right. You trot me out to my best advantage.”
“Done. Now I just need one more thing from you, Emma.” He tapped his lips once. “They’re jealous of all the cheek attention, you know.”
I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed the corner of his mouth quickly. “Good now?”
“Hmm, I’m afraid they’re still jealous.”
“I’m sorry, but I don’t want us to crash.”
“True. That would be a crimp in our plans this weekend.” He frowned and then brightened. “How about you promise me all the kisses, wherever I want, later on tonight?”
I leaned back in my seat, tilting my head as if he’d spoken to me in a language I didn’t quite understand. “You mean at your mother’s house?”
“Yep.”
“Gabriel!”
“Emma!”
“We can’t do that in her house.”
“Why not?”
“Because it would be weird.” My fingers entwined nervously as I stared down at my lap.
“Baby, we’re not teenagers anymore,” Gabriel pointed out reasonably. “Do you really propose we never make love when we visit her? Have separate beds or even separate rooms?”
“Well, maybe.”
Gabriel’s hand cut through the air. “Absolutely, positively not! You sleep where I sleep and I sleep where you sleep. That’s the rules.”
“We don’t always follow the rules.”
“Like when?”
“When you travel for business.”
Gabriel tossed me a shameless grin. “I’m still working on you becoming my muse, Emma. Once that happens you’ll get to fly out with me and all will be right with the rules.”
“Dream on.”
“I will. That and plot until all my dreams come true.”
I slugged him, gently, on the arm. “Are you sure she won’t be offended by us sharing the same room?”
“Emma, love, my mother doesn’t think I’m a virgin. Especially when Ms. Ferramon came over to the house to give me a piece of her mind before she took a bat to my windshield.”
The French teacher. Oh, Gabriel!
You really did it with her.
“Don’t tell me you didn’t believe the rumor? Because it was absolutely true.”
I wrinkled my nose at him. “I don’t even want to get into that, Gabriel other than gross! And maybe Marie doesn’t think you’re a virgin, but that doesn’t mean she’ll want us fornicating in her house.”
“Fornicating? I can’t believe you just used that word, Emma.”
Blushing yet again, I defended myself, albeit weakly. “It’s an appropriate word.”
“Not for long.”
I dared to glance at Gabriel before looking down at my lap again and then out the window. His blunt approach over our future marital state left me tongue-tied and more than a bit excited.
“Breathe, Emma.”
My finger traced the edge of the door. “I’m breathing.”
“Really? Because all I’m hearing are squeaks of air trying to make it through those tiny pursed lips.”
I inhaled deeply and then let it out. “See? I’m breathing.”
“That’s so good to know. Oh, and Emma?”
“Yes?”
“I’m not asking you yet.”
“I know.”
“But I will.”
THIRTEEN
I stood there, thinking about the wonderful man waiting for me at the dock. My heart pounded. It pounded because of the conversation I should’ve never heard and the conversation I wished I’d never had.
What am I going to do now?
Gabriel and I had just arrived maybe an hour ago. Marie welcomed us both warmly into her house, slipping her arm in mine as she showed us to our sprawling room. Catching Gabriel’s smug smirk, I rolled my eyes but I was secretly pleased that we wouldn’t have to sleep apart. Whether we’d fornicate or not was still on the table.
It’d also made me wonder if my mom would be so accommodating to the similar sleeping arrangements. I thought she would but I couldn’t be sure because we’d never crossed that bridge before.
Suddenly, I couldn’t wait to introduce Gabriel to my mom. I also got excited thinking about showing him the house I was so close to buying for her. I felt pure happiness pour over me and how well life was turning out for us both.
I had Gabriel and he had me. What more would I ever need?
Each step up the winding staircase brought another facet of my inspired imagination out. I imagined when Gabriel would ask me to marry him. I hoped I didn’t do something as cliché as crying, but I was sure I’d bawl my eyes out. Maybe the sight of my swollen, red eyes and runny nose would send my love tearing out of the romantic spot he’d chosen for us.
Gabriel would most likely take a picture, hang it up in his office, and then tease me endlessly over it.
I pictured our wedding, hoping it’d be intimate and private. Maybe on the beach. Our honeymoon would probably be only a few days if we were lucky because of how busy Gabriel’s schedule tended to be. I’d still work because I loved my job, but I also knew that I would want to stay home when we had our first baby.
Wait. Baby?
My hand had instantly flown to my belly. I nearly melted at just the thought of carrying Gabriel’s child. Me who’d never given much thought to children—not because I didn’t like them but because I hadn’t come across the right man, much less dated him—instantly knew I’d want as many babies as possible with Gabriel.
I remembered how he’d brought up the possibility twins. I wanted them. I wanted to give him a large family full of children who’d love him even more than I did. I wanted Marie to have grandchildren who’d visit her every week and be as comfortable here in this house as our own. I wanted to create a family with these two people more than I’d ever wanted anything else.
I wanted my mom to see how far we’d come from that tiny, rundown house. That our legacy wasn’t just toil and suffering, but something beautiful and strong beyond mere survival.
By the time we reached our room I was in an altered state of mind. Reborn even. Normally, my logic would’ve reasserted itself. I would’ve shoved the wedding-planning, baby-crazy thoughts way back into the recesses of my mind. I would’ve attributed it to the newness of having a serious relationship with my first love.
I didn’t care if my logic took a hike for the foreseeable future.
Looking around the beautifully decorated space, I verbally admired the mahogany furniture and soothing cream, yellow, and blue palette. Marie smiled with palatable pleasure, admitting she’d done the decorating all herself.
“I love creating a happy space for me and Gabriel. It’s our refuge.”
We both looked out the wall of windows together while Gabriel grabbed our bags out of the car. Wide open water greeted us, the sun glinting on thousands of wavelets. Marie explained how the five acre property sat at the mouth of a cove, making it easy to hop on the docked boat and be in deep water instantly.
“Do you get seasick? Gabriel will probably take you in a few minutes. He loves to go out on the lake every time he visits.”
“I don’t know. I’ve never been on a boat before.”
Marie clapped. “You’re going to love it, Emma. It’s like flying when you’re skimming over the water.”
She then told me how she bought the lakeside retreat within a year after her husband died. I’d caught the note of sadness in Marie’s voice. I wished I could’ve said something, but I didn’t have the gift of saying words without meaning that manifested into the perfect turn of phrase for the occasion. I doubted she would’ve wanted my pity and I also doubted she would’ve wanted me to know the tragic state of her marriage.
So I said nothing.
Marie had then briskly turned around and offered me a tour. Three levels, more rooms than a person could realistically use, and yet she managed to make it feel warm and livable. Gabriel joined us in the library, carrying a rather large wrapped box in his arms.
He set it down on the desk and stepped back expectantly.
“What’s this?”
“You didn’t really think I’d forget, did you?”
Lost, I shook my head. Gabriel placed my hands on the festive pink bow and urged me to open it. As mother and son looked on expectantly, I quickly tore through the paper and lifted the lid to peer inside. Neat stacks of paperbacks filled the entire space.
“I hope you don’t mind, Emma, but when we met at lunch I thought about book recommendations for you. These are books I’ve read and loved many times. I thought you might like to give them a new home.”
“They’re yours, Marie?”
She nodded. Impulsively, I flew into her arms and hugged her. “Thank you so much. I can’t wait to read them all.”
“You’re so very welcome.”
“Me too!” Gabriel cried out, enveloping us both in his arms. We all laughed together before my sweet boyfriend carried my box up the stairs to our room.
Just as Marie predicted, Gabriel asked me if I wanted to ride the waves with him. I did and we left the house to go to the boat. If everything had gone like planned, we would’ve been on the water as Gabriel impressed me with how fast the cabin cruiser went.
Instead, I got cold and turned back towards the house.
I also didn’t mean to overhear them. Really.
All I meant to do was grab my jacket from our room. But when I headed upstairs I heard my name. Thinking Marie had called me, I turned around and walked towards the study. That’s when I realized I was wrong.
Marie wasn’t talking to me at all. My stomach dropped and dread moved into the vacant space. Lucas was at the house. Why?
“You shouldn’t be here. I specifically asked you not to come.”
“I couldn’t stay away. I’m done keeping my distance.”
“Not now.”
“Yes, now. Especially now, Marie. He’s brought her here to see you. You know what that means.”
“He’s happy with her, Lucas. Happier than I’d ever seen him before.”
“It’s not enough.”
“For me it is! You don
’t have the right to interfere with their relationship.”
“How can you say that to me?”
“I’m sorry, Lucas, but you have to know that Gabriel’s happiness is all that’s ever mattered to me.”
“You should’ve left Ryan a long time ago if you wanted Gabriel happy. He destroyed that boy and you know it!”
Silence. “You know why I couldn’t. He would’ve killed us both.”
“I wouldn’t have let that happen.”
“You couldn’t stop what happened behind closed doors. Instead, you got married and moved 500 miles away for three years.”
I winced at the implication. I took a step back, hoping to make my way upstairs without hearing anything more.
“And I’ve regretted every day of it since.”
“Lucas, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. Again.”
“And you’re right. Again. That’s why I’m going to stop this.”
“No. You think you’re saving Gabriel but all you’ll do is hurt him. Why do you even want to? Because of Embry? That ship has sailed, Lucas, and you know it.”
“No.”
Marie’s voice sharpened. “Gabriel doesn’t love Embry. He never did. It was obvious that all he felt for her was pity and guilt.”
“He was gentle with her.”
“Yes, he was. Gentle and completely false.”
“She loves him and he’ll grow to love her.”
“Like the way you did with Delia?”
“It doesn’t have to be that way between them. Embry can fulfill Gabriel in ways Emma cannot.”
“You don’t know that.”
“Marie, trust me. I do.”
My face colored. Lucas knew about Gabriel’s tastes and how Embry fit into that. And how he assumed I didn’t.
“I know my son. He’s loved Emma since he was a boy. If it hasn’t changed by now it won’t.”
“Yes, I know about his silly infatuation with her. We both saw how well that turned out.”
“It wasn’t her fault.”
“I beg to differ.” Frustration deepened his tone. “We came so close to losing Gabriel because of that girl! Don’t ask me to support his relationship with her now, Marie. I won’t do it.”
Wait what? What happened to Gabriel?
“It’s different between them.”
Dangerous for You Page 14
