Allerleirauh

by Chantal Gadoury

  “Where is home?” he persisted. Reactively, the words slipped from my lips before I had the chance to stop them.

  “The Königreich of Tränen.”

  “Ah . . .” he said as he nodded. “I have heard a great many rumors over the years of the König and his diligence in finding a wife.”

  I turned my gaze away, feeling a shudder run down the length of my spine as Prince Klaus continued.

  “Lord Crestwood was just at there to bring an alliance between our two kingdoms.” He paused and shook his head as he slid a hand through his hair. “I’m not quite sure why I’m telling you all this.”

  I stared at him from where I stood, tucked away behind the door. The movement of his hand through his hair reminded me of my father. The way he once stood in his chambers, bidding me to come closer. I wanted to bar the door and get away from the prince as soon as I could. Prince Klaus cleared his throat and knelt for the tray at his feet.

  “I hope to see you at breakfast,” he murmured as he straightened. His gaze caught mine again, and I nodded silently in agreement.

  “I would like to hear your story as to how you found yourself in the forest,” he added.

  “Yes, Your—”

  “Klaus, please,” he interjected with a small smile.

  Another nod. Klaus took a step back as I slowly began to close the door. I felt a wave of relief wash over me as I was finally free of his gaze and questions. I waited until I heard his departing footsteps. After a long moment, I eased the door open again and saw the darkened corridor and I knew I was finally alone. Locking the door at last, I eased the hood of my cloak away and turned back to the large room.

  Myriah was not here to tend or comfort me. There were no familiar faces I could call upon. I should have been glad to be away from my father, his kingdom and men, but I felt a great loss that I could not explain.

  I slipped my cloak away, draping it over one of the large chairs in the corner of the room. I explored the large armoire, successfully finding a folded, fresh nightgown. I pulled the soft fabric over my head, as I coiled my hair over my shoulder.

  The room was too large to cradle me in my deep despair, so I disappeared back into adjoining blue room and curled up in the window seat. Leaning my head against the cool glass, I looked out over the darkened gardens and the night sky full of bright stars. It was strange to think I had been running beneath the cloak of darkness only hours before, and now I was tucked away in this beautiful palace with a gentle prince. My eyes grew heavy and it became more and more difficult to deny myself sleep.

  I adjusted, laying myself across the window seat. I could feel a cold draft through the glass, so I trailed back to the bedroom and grabbed my fur cloak. As soon as I situated myself over the plushy cushions of the alcove, curled underneath the warmth of the furs, I slowly began to drift into a deep slumber.

  24

  A delais was the first to knock on my door the next morning. I jolted up from my makeshift window bed, breath catching in my throat. Panic filled me. I stood and quickly wrapped the cloak around myself to avoid having my true identity being seen.

  “Milady, are you awake?”

  Another knock. I lifted the hood so it rested over my matted hair and made for the door.

  “Oh!” Adelais pressed her hand against her chest, startled by my appearance as I pushed the door open. I imagined she hoped I would have taken her advice by leaving my coat for the servants, but I didn’t. The furs were my second skin.

  “The prince wishes for you to join him for breakfast in the dining hall,” she said flustered as she tried to push herself into the room, but I stood in place.

  “I shall come to breakfast once I’m ready,” I murmured.

  “Sehr gut,” she said with a nod. “In the meantime, we shall take your cloak and give it a good scrub. God only knows what crawls underneath . . .”

  I took a step back, a soft growl escaping from deep inside me. Her eyes widened with alarm.

  “My cloak does not need your attentions,” I snapped. I clenched the folds of my coat tighter together. She wrinkled her nose, displeased with my response.

  “The prince does not feed wild animals at his table,” she remarked as she turned on her heel.

  “Wild animals take many forms. I’m sure I will not be the first at his table,” I retorted and then I slammed the door.

  How dare she speak to me in that way? I held my breath until I was sure she was gone. Pushing the cloak from my shoulders, I dressed in the simple gown I draped over the chair from the night before. I found a small drawer of ribbons in the armoire and tied my hair back with a delicate, white ribbon. I stared at my reflection in the mirror, taking in the dark circles on my face and the great sadness lingering in my eyes.

  I hardly recognized the woman who stared back at me. I touched my cheek numbly, feeling insecure. I could see Myriah hastily tending to me in my memory. She would have known what to do to make me smile. Tears stirred again and fell over my cheeks. Perhaps if I had just stayed . . .

  I pulled the cloak around myself again and held onto it tightly until I could feel myself begin to calm. This would be my safe haven; a way for me to hide from the pain I felt. There was too much pain, too much guilt.

  I suddenly remembered the prince was waiting for me. Wiping away the stray tears, I slipped on a fresh pair of soft brown shoes I found near doorway. They were a nearly perfect fit. Pushing myself from my room, I wandered down the corridor.

  I could hear a gathering of voices in one of the nearby halls, and the smell of cooked foods wafted through the air. Moving past large tapestries on the walls and many closed doors, I finally found the way to the room where the prince and Lord Crestwood were eating. I paused near the entry, taking a deep breath. Perhaps I should have refused the invitation to breakfast. I was hardly ready to face him again. I felt nervous in his presence. The warmth I found in his eyes left my stomach curling with timid knots, and my hands clammy.

  I listened closer, hearing the familiar voice belonging to Lord Crestwood.

  “. . .and the animal girl? What have you done with her?” he asked.

  I could hear a few chairs scuffing against the floor and someone cleared their throat.

  “She’s a guest,” Klaus replied.

  I inched a bit closer to the door, peeking into the room. Klaus was sitting with the familiar man. Steam swirled from the goblets before them. On the table were plates of breads, fruits, and meats.

  “She should be here soon. I sent Adelais to gather her,” Klaus added, placing his cup down onto the table. It seemed as if Adelais heard him beckoning for her as she appeared behind him, placing another plate of food near his place.

  “You woke her?” Klaus glanced to Adelais with a question in his eyes and she gave him a stern stare.

  “Indeed, Your Highness. She’s a wild, high-spirited . . . being. She refused to give me that hideous cloak of furs. She looks like a beast wearing that thing.”

  “The boys who spotted her thought she was,” Lord Crestwood jested, lifting a bread roll to his lips and tore a piece away. “I think if we hadn’t been there, they might have mistaken her for a real animal.”

  I saw Klaus smirk and shake his head. Adelais stood upright, raising her hands to her hips.

  “She’s just a girl,” Klaus said, grinning up at Adelais. “Do you not remember when I was a beast as a child? I wore the same tunic every day. Day in and day out, and refused to allow anyone to wash it. And let’s not forget the mask I made of sticks and—”

  “And cow manure,” Lord Crestwood said with a grin. “It was cow manure. Even if you did say it was clay.”

  Adelais turned her attention to Klaus as a small smile drew upon her lips.

  “That was quite different. You were a child and knew no better.”

  “Not exactly different. There must be a reason for her wanting to wear the cloak. It does not bother me, nor should it bother you, Adelais. I’m sure with time, she’ll find something new to her lik
ing.”

  Adelais sighed and shook her head. “You are too kind, Your Highness.”

  “Hardly,” he said with a chuckle. “She’s from Tränen and from my knowledge the Königreich has gone through quite a bit in the past few years. I’m sure with some compassion and patience she won’t feel the need to shroud herself in such things.”

  “You’ve heard then about the König?” Lord Crestwood asked, turning his attention to the prince.

  Klaus nodded as he picked up a bundle of grapes and popped one into his mouth.

  “Indeed. The loss of a wife is a difficult thing for any man, but the death of a Königin can darken the morale of an entire people. A sorry thing to happen to a Königreich.”

  Slinking back into the shadows, I could feel my heartbeat quicken. The König. Me. The kingdom. I was suddenly triggered back to the fiery night, into stabbing the guard, flames roaring at my father’s feet, his body pressed against mine in a drugged waltz.

  “I could not believe his sentiments and interests were turned towards his own flesh and blood,” Lord Crestwood went on. “I met the princess on my visit, and she was charming, beautiful, and kind. While her father was strange, I found the news of his engagement to his own daughter revolting.” I watched as he grimaced and took a sip of his steaming drink.

  So he did remember me.

  “God save his soul,” Adelais whispered as she made a cross over her chest.

  “And hers,” Klaus replied gravely as he fixated his gaze on Lord Crestwood.

  God would need to do much more than save my soul. I could feel the shivers reeling up and down my spine as I resisted the urge to leave. The desire to go back to the room was pressing and urgent, but as soon as I was about to turn to go, I heard Klaus shout my name, “Allerleirauh!”

  I stopped in my tracks and slowly took a step towards the entrance of the hall, keeping my chin lowered. Lord Crestwood was leaning over the table to catch a glimpse of me, as Adelais’s hands were still on her hips. I felt almost like a child, caught in a wrong-doing. Unsure, I took a step into the dining room, keeping my gaze on the floor. I knew if I kept my chin down, keeping the wolf’s head low enough over my eyes, it would make it harder for anyone to recognize me.

  “How long have you been standing there, Allerleirauh?” the prince asked me softly, his voice kind. I slowly shifted my weight from one foot to the other. My hands turned clammy and the coat seemed to grow heavier on my shoulders.

  “Speak up, girl,” Adelais said, coming towards me with her fluttering hands.

  She pulled me into the room, resisting my efforts as I tried to pry her hands away from me. She tugged me towards the chair beside Lord Crestwood. I could feel the prince’s gaze on me as I kept my chin down.

  “Not long.” I managed softly, darting a cold glare beneath the safety of the wolf’s head at Adelais. Taking my seat as Adelais directed, I tucked my hands into my lap. I tried to lean away from Lord Crestwood, wishing to keep enough distance so he wouldn’t see me too closely.

  “The prince says you’re from Tränen. What brought you to Saarland der Licht?” Lord Crestwood asked carefully.

  I didn’t dare to look at him. I couldn’t take the chance that he’d recognize me. The wolf’s head shifted lower, nearly covering the tip of my nose. I could not reveal the truth of my identity to him, nor anyone else in the room. If they thought my father was damned by his actions, they would think the same of me for killing him and all of those who lived and worked in the castle.

  “Did you not find your new clothes to your liking?” Lord Crestwood asked, gesturing towards my attire. “Milady, if you are so cold, we could have a new cloak made for you. Fires could be tended by the servants. There’s no need to wear such a . . .” He paused. “Such a beastly thing. Beauty does not deserve to be concealed in such ways.”

  He was trying to flatter me, much like he had done at the ball. I lifted a small piece of cheese to my lips and bit into it, blatantly ignoring his comment. I took a piece of bread, another slice of cheese, and a small plump grape.

  “Perhaps she does not wish to speak, Your Highness,” Lord Crestwood jested, turning his attention towards the prince. “Perhaps she would prefer to be treated like the animal she wishes to reflect.”

  “Enough, Crestwood,” Klaus snapped, placing his goblet down upon the table, eyeing him humorlessly. “Your remarks do not help the situation.”

  Crestwood placed his napkin near his plate and snapped his fingers. “Adelais . . .” She came to his side offering more to drink. He gestured towards an empty cup beside his steaming goblet and then mine. Without another word, Adelais poured the hot brew into my own goblet.

  “We shall have a toast this morning,” he said with a smirk.

  I could tell by his tone he was trying to initiate a dispute between the two of us. This was a side of him I was shocked to see.

  “To new friends,” he said simply as he lifted his goblet in the air. My hands were hesitant in lifting the goblet, or turning in his direction. I only dared to glance from beneath the wolf’s head still looming over my eyes. Lord Crestwood’s eyes were sparkling with a familiar spite; taunting me, daring me to participate.

  I didn’t understand the reasoning for his behavior towards me. I shot my gaze to the goblet in front of me, and then to the prince who glared at his friend.

  “Will you not toast with me?” Lord Crestwood asked, feigning offense as his goblet lingered near his head.

  “Crestwood,” Klaus let out a sigh, shaking his head, “I said enough. There’s no need to antagonize the poor girl.”

  Lord Crestwood slammed his goblet down a bit too hard and I jumped in my seat. A shudder ran down my spine. A wave of recollection of my father sitting in the dining hall as he too, once slammed his first on the table; his hard glare at those who angered him—those same eyes that terrorized me. I pushed my plate away as my hands trembled. I tried to pull myself from my thoughts and back into reality. Everything around me felt dizzy. My heart was wild in my chest and I couldn’t breathe. I tried to hold my attention to the place-setting in front of me, the twisted bread that was unfamiliar or the hot, spiced chocolate; anything to remind me that I was not in Tränen. My father was not here, and none of those around me would harm me; I wouldn’t let them.

  “Are you alright?” the prince asked as he reached across the table for me. I slid my hands away, shaking my head. My chin began to tremble.

  “E-Excuse me, Your Highness,” I managed to say as I stood.

  I did not wait to be excused from the table. I turned on my heel and pushed myself from the room. I could hear Prince Klaus’s voice reprimand Lord Crestwood sharply, “Look now at what you’ve done.”

  I escaped out into the hallway, skimming my hand along the white stone wall. I ignored each of the servants as they passed with friendly greetings. I continued down the hallway and out to the open windows that overlooked the river. Unlatching the wooden frame, I pushed open the panes, enjoying the cool breeze on my face. There was a sweet fragrance of flowers wafting from the nearby gardens.

  “Why are you here in Saarland der Licht?” I heard Prince Klaus’s voice to my side, and I turned at once.

  He was only a few footsteps away from me and watched me curiously. His brown hair reflected gold strands in the sunlight. I hadn’t noticed how regal he appeared, dressed in a fine cream-colored tunic. On top, he wore a dark brown vest, decorated with designs of gold and silver thread. His eyes were kind, yet curious as he took another step towards me.

  “I was only passing through,” I murmured, turning my gaze back out the window. “I was told your kingdom was a safe place.”

  “You said you were from Tränen,” He nodded as he took another step. My eyes darted to his feet, willing him to stay in place.

  “Yes, Your Highness,” I replied sincerely.

  Klaus’s eyes caught mine and my cheeks warmed. He told me not to use such formalities with him, but I didn’t feel comfortable enough to call him by name. I
had never done such a thing with anyone other than Myriah.

  “What was in Tränen for you?” he asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

  Klaus’s stance was powerful as he stood there, keeping his gaze locked with mine. He resembled a strength I had seen in my father too. My stomach began to tighten. I wanted to go to my room.

  “Do you have family there?” Prince Klaus continued, and I slowly nodded.

  I hoped he wouldn’t press for more information from me. I didn’t want to talk about my family. I didn’t want to talk about my father or anything to do with Tränen.

  As Prince Klaus parted his lips to continue, I bowed.

  “I think I shall retire to my room,” I murmured as I slowly began to straighten again. He raised his brow.

  “The day has just begun. I thought you’d like to take a turn in the garden,” he said, gesturing to the open doors behind him. I shook my head.

  “It’s kind of you to think of me, Your Highness. But I’d like to go back to my room now, if you will excuse me.”

  “Do I make you uncomfortable?” he asked suddenly as I turned on my heel.

  Letting out a soft sigh, I turned to look over my fur-covered shoulder at him.

  “I thank you for your kindness, Your Highness.”

  “My name is Klaus,” he said earnestly. “I’d like it very much if we could be friends.” The prince took a step in my direction, in which I countered with taking one of my own away from him.

  I wanted to be alone. I knew no matter what happened to me now, I would never belong to the world in the same way he did. My father had stolen my humanity away from me.

  “I just want to help you.” Klaus sounded conflicted as he watched me take another step away from him.

  “I can take care of myself,” I murmured and pushed myself away from him and the hallway before he could say anything more.

  I didn’t stop until I was in the safety of my room. Clicking the lock in place, hot tears rolled down my cheeks. So many questions circled as I moved to the adjoining room and sat upon the window seat. I watched the prince and his courtiers enjoy their life from afar, wishing and remembering when I too had been so free.