Allerleirauh

by Chantal Gadoury

  “I didn’t want anyone to know. I didn’t . . .” I began but Lord Crestwood lifted his hand and shook his head.

  “I understand why,” he murmured. “And I think the prince will too.” He stood from his chair and crossed his arms. “You must tell Klaus the truth.”

  “I can’t. . .” I murmured desperately. Lord Crestwood shook his head as he took a step closer to me and the fireplace.

  “Then, do you plan on attending the ball tonight? To honor Princess Margrit?”

  “I promised him I would go,” I replied.

  “Your father and Lord Haven will be there as well,” he replied cautiously.

  “I know.” I nodded and brushed a finger over my forehead. I knew there was much at stake. Being seen again by Lord Haven and my father could mean ruining the new life I just began to create in Saarland der Licht; the glass would shatter. But I knew what I had to do.

  “I promised Klaus,” I replied, searching his gaze for understanding.

  “It would be my pleasure to escort you then,” Lord Crestwood said with a polite bow. I watched as he turned on his heel towards the door and paused only at the doorway.

  “Stay safe, princess.”

  Lord Crestwood lowered his chin and then disappeared around the corner. After letting out a shaky breath, I moved to the library window. The gentle melody of the princess’s laugh floated from the garden below. As my eyes roamed the landscape, I found her clinging tightly to Klaus’s arm; her chin tilted as she looked up at him lovingly. A surge of jealousy filled me as I watched them together. It was a new overwhelming emotion. Her hand brushed through the locks of her hair as she continued to giggle. I knew I could never be as carefree and joyful as the Princess of Foix de Lille, but it did not diminish the depth of my feelings for him. I was strong and brave in my own way. I knew hiding behind the cloak of fur would not bring me strength – not anymore. Tonight, I would not simply just be Aurelia. Tonight, I would be the Princess of Tränen.

  36

  I did as Lord Crestwood requested of me and stayed in the safety of my own chambers for the rest of the day. I spent many hours pacing back and forth, reciting and replaying what I would say when I saw my father again.

  A maid came to my room with my mid-day meal, though the meat and bread sat on the table untouched; I couldn’t bear the idea of eating. My thoughts did not drift away from Klaus or the time we had spent together. There, in the tranquil forest, I learned how to trust again. In his strong arms, I had fallen in love. Knowing he was spending his time with another – his promised wife – tore my heart and soul into tiny slivers of nothing. Was this a part of my mother’s curse?

  I watched from the window as carriages began to arrive, bringing the many guests Lord Crestwood had invited before leaving Foix de Lille. They were all coming to hear Klaus’s formal announcement of his engagement. As I stared down at the many visitors, I wondered what this night would have been like for Klaus if he’d never known me; if I had never come to Saarland der Licht. The sun gently began to melt behind the mountains, casting shades of blood red and deep orange hues across the sky. As the quiet twilight approached, I knew it was time to prepare myself for the ball. It was time to face what I had spent so much time avoiding: the revealing of who I truly was.

  Taking one of the walnuts from my stowed away satchel, I pried the shells apart again, unleashing a glittering black light. The stardust dress fell to the floor in a heap of sparkling folds. As I lifted it up against my chest, I admired the dark blue silk as hints of black and purple hues peeked from different places along the bodice and skirts. Among the colors were little glittering stars, which adorned the body of the dress. As I slipped the gown on and tied it together, I couldn’t stop gazing at myself in the mirror before me. The bodice of the dress curved up towards my neck, leaving my arms bare. The skirt of the gown was full with many layers of fabric which flowed down over my hips, to the floor. I twirled my hair up with small, delicate combs and a jewel encrusted ribbon. I weaved the ribbon so it resembled a small crown around my head. As I stared at my reflection in the mirror, I knew after tonight, I would no longer be able to run away from my true identity.

  I lifted a part of the star dress, admiring the fabric varying in hues of black, dark blue, and purple, with the glitter of stars all over the bodice and skirt. I watched as the gown glistened in the candlelight, remembering how I once tried to burn the fabric with Myriah. I would wear the cage my father had once tried to trap me with. I knew I was the only person who could ever set myself free from him for good.

  My heart raced with the fear of knowing all of this would soon be over. My ever-growing fear of my father taking hold of me again, scared me the most. There was much bustling about outside of my door, and sounds of the servants shouting to each other echoed through the door. I was surprised Adelais had not come to my room to check up on me; I presumed she was far too busy attending to the Princess of Foix de Lille now.

  With a swallow of courage, I pushed myself from my room and emerged out into the hallway. The sounds of a soft melody of music echoed from the ballroom. As I rounded the corner, I saw the long hall overlooking the river awash with the golden light from dozens of candles. A selection of musicians clustered in the corner while guests flocked in and around the corridor; I hadn’t realized so many people had already arrived.

  When my mother has been alive, she always had been sure to have every single candle in the castle lit and decorated with an arrangement of sparkling jewels. The ballroom always glittered almost as brightly as a diamond when it was in the direct sunlight. The food had been delicious and the dancing would last into the early morning hours. Once again, it was my turn to try to enjoy the delights of the party. I would join a part of the world I once chosen to burn away. It seemed so distant in the whirl of all the events, which had transpired in the sequence of these last weeks. I scanned the hall for any sign of Lord Crestwood or the prince among the guests, but they were nowhere to be found. I imagined they were enjoying a dinner with the Princess Margrit.

  “We meet again, princess,” Lord Haven’s voice suddenly hissed near my ear and I quickly turned to see the large man standing beside me. “I should be surprised that you’re here, but strangely I am not.”

  “I could say the same about you,” I said through gritted teeth as I narrowed my eyes. I tried to stop myself from shuddering. His familiar face sent flashes of the past to mind, but I resisted giving into those triggers. Not now.

  “What shall your König say when he discovers this is where you have been cowering?” he taunted, leaning closer. I took a step back as I glared at him.

  “What you seem to forget is the König is also my father,” I growled. “Were you truly going to allow him to marry his own daughter?”

  “I should drag you back to the König now to show you what your careless actions have done to him,” he said, lifting his brow with amusement.

  “Neither he nor you have any power over me while I’m here,” I retorted. “Neither one of you will touch me. The prince and Lord Crestwood have promised to protect me . . ..”

  “So he knows the truth then?” Lord Haven’s brow arched with curiosity. My breath caught in my throat. I saw a flash of intrigue and amusement in his eye. I bit the inside of my cheek as I turned my blue gaze away. Lord Haven clicked his tongue and tsk’d.

  “Ah, I see then. He knows of the princess, but he doesn’t realize that you are the princess. So what shall happen when he does?”

  “I hope he throws you both out,” I snarled.

  “The König did nothing improper, princess,” Lord Haven said as he straightened, pushing his hands behind his back. He gave a few nods to passersby, and grinned politely. I focused on maintaining the distance between us. With disgust, I continued to listen.

  “He followed exactly what the Königin made him promise. He searched the land for a bride,” Lord Haven said as he eyed me.

  “I don’t recall her ever mentioning to marry me, Lord Haven, his own
daughter. I do recall I was in the room when she died or do you not remember the occasion?”

  I wished wholeheartedly for Klaus or Lord Crestwood to round the corner and to save me from the distressing situation.

  “You must know you killed many innocent members of the household with your childish departure that night. Including your maid . . . Myriah, wasn’t it?” Lord Haven smirked, looking pleased as I cringed.

  Myriah.

  “Thankfully, I pulled your father out of the castle just in time. He had been burned badly,” he continued. Another nod, another greeting to a passing stranger. “Now, he needs a kind and selfless wife to attend to his wounds.”

  “I’m not interested in becoming anyone’s wife,” I hissed to him. “Least of all, his.”

  “Unless a proposal came from the Prince of Saarland der Licht, am I correct princess? If the prince proposed to you, there would surely be an acceptance from you,” Lord Haven remarked. “I’m sure you’ve grown quite attached to the handsome young man while you’ve been here.”

  Rage filled my veins as I turned to glare at Lord Haven. I wanted to dig my nails into his eyes and scream. How dare he?

  “What does it matter to you? To anyone . . .” I said through gritted teeth. It didn’t matter. The prince would never be mine, and he would never offer a proposal to me. I slid my hands over the fabric around my hips and frowned.

  “Any woman would be honored to have the prince offer them such a thing. He’s always been kind to me. He’s been gentle and good . . . and my friend,” I continued.

  “He cannot be all chivalrous to allow himself to enter a marriage that is purely for the gain of his Königreich,” Lord Haven sniffed.

  “There is no crime in his choice. He has a duty he feels he must fulfill. Who am I to stop him from doing what he feels is right?”

  “Did your father not do the same thing? Will you be burning down his castle as well if he follows through with the marriage?” he mocked with a smirk. He took a step closer to me, lifting his hand in front of me as if to offer me a dance. To the watching eyes around us, he was being polite, but I knew better. I shifted uncomfortably, staring down at his offered hand.

  “In lieu of proposals, I should marry you myself if I had the tolerance for your stubbornness. Your father is on the brink of death. The injuries he accumulated has worn down his health. But, if I were to marry you, the Princess of Tränen,” he mocked. “It would place me upon the throne. With no living male heir, whomever were to marry you would gain the entire kingdom.” My eyes darted upwards, as I took another step away from him.

  “Fight as you may, Aurelia. Everyone will learn of who you are and the crimes you’ve committed. You’ll be outcast by the prince himself. And when that occurs, my proposal will not seem so repulsive to you then.”

  “No one would ever tolerate you or my father if they knew the truth. It will not be me who is thrown out, but the both of you! What happened in Tränen is a reflection upon him, not me,” I said, pressing my hands behind my back.

  “There is no proof of your allegations. All the blood of those who died is upon your hands,” he retorted. “If there was evidence, it would be just as much your fault as his. You took his invitation to his chambers. You allowed him to take you. You desired him!”

  Lord Haven pressed a finger against my cheek as he inched closer.

  “Remove your hand, sir,” I hissed. “You forget your place.” I had never spoken so forcefully before, but my anger was wild. Despite my rapid pulse, I stood stoic. Lord Haven forced a smile on his lips as his hand fell to his side. I continued to glare darkly at him.

  “Those deaths are on my father’s hands. His sins are his own. What transpired are the consequences of his actions,” I countered and bowed, taking my leave from him and the conversation. I couldn’t tolerate a moment more. I needed to find Lord Crestwood or Klaus immediately. I needed to wake up from this nightmare.

  “We shall see,” he murmured as he politely bowed back and disappeared into the throng of twirling people.

  I pushed myself through the crowd, determined to find a familiar face. As I moved down the long hallway, I searched through the many faces. The music vibrated through the crowd as I weaved in and out, until I reached the other end of the corridor. I wished suddenly for my strange and large cloak, so I could wrap it around myself and hide away. I watched several of the guests chuckling and gossiping as they gathered in small groups, sipping wine and nibbling on small, delicate foods. As I glanced from guest to guest, I saw no faces I recognized. There were only ghosts of people I had seen once in another time, in another place, with a man who I thought I could trust. I almost took a step back, and left from the overwhelming fear I felt.

  But there, parting the surrounding crowds of guests, appeared Prince Klaus. He looked at me with a softened expression as he extended his hand to me. I saw the curve of his lips turn into a small smile, as if he were too, relieved to see me. I couldn’t stop myself from doing the same. I knew there were eyes on the both of us including his bride-to-be, but I wanted this one last moment with him; a memory to last me into the years of the future. A moment where I could be exactly who I wished to be, a princess who danced with the prince she had learned to trust and love.

  I graciously took his hand and bowed. I almost felt as though I were unfeeling; my mind moved my body while I was completely out of control. I saw him gesture towards the musicians in the corner and the soft melody began again. The crowd parted even more, allowing the both of us to move between them and onto the large dance floor. I could feel my cheeks burn as he pulled me close, my hand lifting to his shoulder and his hand around my waist.

  Slowly, a group of others began to dance around us, until we were only another couple blended in with other swirling skirts and clinking wine glasses. This was far from the dance we had shared the night before.

  “I thought I wouldn’t see you tonight,” Klaus murmured softly as he glanced at me from under his lashes.

  “I wasn’t sure if I’d come,” I admitted. “I . . . I’m sorry for what happened. How I was . . . what I said,” I murmured, trying to collect my thoughts and words.

  “I know,” Klaus murmured. “I am too.”

  As I gazed into his green eyes, I could see the unhappiness lingering there. Our bodies moved back and forth in unison with the music of the orchestra, the beautiful melody twisting my heart.

  “What did you do with yourself today?” He asked thoughtfully as his hand moved to the small of my back.

  “I stayed in my rooms. I did not want to get in the way or cause any trouble,” I confessed as I turned my gaze away ashamed. I wrinkled my nose as I tried to find the right words to express all that I was feeling deep inside. There was so much to say – so much to tell. . .

  “You wouldn’t have caused any trouble, Aurelia,” he responded with a firm shake of his head.

  “Have you enjoyed your time with the princess?” I asked, trying to think of something to say. Klaus shrugged slightly as he tilted his chin in the direction of other dancers.

  “The princess is dancing with Lord Crestwood now, just over there,” he gestured to the couple only a few steps away. “I think he has enjoyed the time far more than I have.”

  As I peered to look at her again, I was fascinated by just how lovely she was. Her chestnut hair was twirled in beautifully-made curls and decorated with an assortment of fine jewels. She danced with such grace and poise, she looked as though she belonged in the prince’s palace.

  “Do you fancy her?” I asked softly, my eyes shifting from the lovely woman back to Klaus.

  “She’s sweet and very knowledgeable,” he murmured. “. . . but I have hardly taken a fancy to her. This is purely a business transaction. She’s made that quite clear to me.”

  “How so?” I asked with a tilt of my chin. I was taken aback by his words. When I had seen them in the garden earlier from the window, she was nearly fawning over him.

  “Well, she’s certainly no
t here for my company.” Klaus said with a sigh. “I think she has more ideas about how to spend my family’s money for herself then use it towards the good of the kingdom.”

  “What has Lord Crestwood told you to do?” I asked, searching his eyes. Perhaps with Lord Crestwood knowing how Klaus felt, things could be different. As I glanced in the direction of the dancing princess, I saw Lord Crestwood kissing her hand and guiding her away from the dance floor.

  “With regards to my choice at midnight?” he asked. When I didn’t reply, Klaus let out a puff of air and shrugged. I could see the lack of clarity by the way he held himself before me; the gentle sway as he shifted from one foot to another.

  “I’ll appease him with the ball. I’ll play host until midnight, but I’m not quite sure how much more of the princess I can tolerate in one evening, much less than in an entire lifetime,” he said as his jaw clenched. Klaus lifted my hand as the melody around us came to an end. His lips pressed a soft kiss against my knuckles. The look in his eye as he released my hand begged me to trust him.

  “You can trust me . . .”

  He took a step, leaning towards me to whisper in my ear, “You look like an enchanted princess.” As he moved away, I saw a hint of amusement in his eye, as if he were trying to share an unspoken secret with me. A hand brushed against my back, startling me suddenly. The contact caused me to jump away from Klaus.

  “I’m so sorry to startle you, milady,” a familiar voice said behind me. I turned, glancing over my shoulder to see Lord Haven. His expression was a slight sneer as he bowed quickly to Prince Klaus.

  “Your Grace, I came to congratulate you for your partnership with the Princess of Foix de Lille and to our alliance. It will only serve for the better good between our two kingdoms.”

  As he stood, Lord Haven rested his hand on his chest, eyeing me sinisterly.

  “I had also hoped I could have the pleasure of dancing with this beautiful creature. She seems to have captivated the room,” Lord Haven declared, gesturing towards me. Klaus nodded his hesitant approval and gave Lord Haven a curt, polite smile. With the curve of his lips and the way his smile didn’t reach his eyes, led me to believe Klaus didn’t care for Lord Haven.