Silent Night: Vampire Holiday Romance (The Night Songs Collection Book 4)

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Silent Night: Vampire Holiday Romance (The Night Songs Collection Book 4) Page 10

by Strassel, Kristen


  “How did you get so smart?” I put my hand over his on the gear shift.

  “By doing a lot of stupid things.” He didn’t look at me this time, but I could see the corners of his mouth turn up. “I know you feel like you’re the only person in the world this has ever happened to, but you’re not.”

  “Like Marielle?”

  “She did her best with what she had.” Those words marked the end of that conversation. Aidan turned up the radio as he wove his way through a busy downtown area. The highway ended at the airport, and dumped everyone onto the North Shore with no warning. I sang along quietly and tried to relax.

  “Have you ever noticed,” I had to say something to break the silence. “That the North Shore is obsessed with roast beef? There are more roast beef places up here than Dunkin’ Donuts, I swear.”

  Aidan laughed. “I never thought about it, but you’re right. It’s odd, isn’t it?”

  “What’s your favorite thing to eat?” I never saw him eat anything. By the laws of science, he should be dead.

  He sighed. “I eat to live, really. I’m much more about experiences.”

  “Is that why you’re a writer?”

  “Maybe.” He nodded. “It helps me process everything, and make sense of it.”

  “So then, what’s your favorite thing you’ve ever done?”

  “I stayed in London for a little while, years ago now. That was fantastic. I helped a good friend start her real estate business. It’s been amazing to watch that grow.”

  “Where else have you travelled?”

  “I’ve been all over Canada and the Northeast. London, Paris of course. New Orleans, Las Vegas.”

  “Paris sounds so romantic. I’ve lived in Brighton and Cambridge. Big whoop.”

  “You have your whole life ahead of you.” Aidan smiled as he parked the car. “Let’s take a walk.”

  He came around to my side to open my door, offering his hand so to help me get out. He never let go of it. We’d parked right along a breakwater. The ocean waves crashed against the wall, angry tonight. There must have been a storm somewhere out to sea. The cool, salty air was more invigorating than any cup of coffee.

  “Look at the moon!” I pointed at the sky. “She’s so beautiful tonight.”

  “Lady La Luna is a peculiar woman.” Aidan swung my hand back and forth a bit as we walked. “When she’s in her full glory, it makes the earth crazy with jealousy.”

  “Maybe that’s why that party was such a disaster.”

  “Maybe,” Aidan agreed. “I know it’s why the waves are so choppy.”

  I squealed as ocean water splashed us as we walked. The frigid water felt like little knives cutting my skin. Aidan didn’t flinch. “Are you shivering?” he asked.

  “A little.” I hadn’t dressed for outdoors. He took off his jacket and laid it over my shoulders. “Now you’re going to be shivering.”

  “I can take it.” He deepened his voice.

  “Everything is just right when I’m with you.” I put my arm around his waist as we continued walking. “I mean, this night is beautiful, and you didn’t even have a plan. You came and rescued me and you knew just what to do.”

  “The ocean always makes me feel better.” He stopped and looked out, the moonlight shattering on broken waves. “When I come here, all the bad stuff goes out to sea, and I walk away feeling better.”

  “I’m going to make new friends, right?” I rested my head against his shoulder. I felt like I was mourning the loss of people who weren’t dead, even if I didn’t even particularly like them anymore. But there was still a part of me that felt so empty without them. Paige and Matt had been a part of my life since elementary school.

  “Those people were never your friends in the first place.” His lips moved against my hair. “Your life is going to be so full, you’ll wonder why you ever thought you needed them.”

  I looked up at him, just to make sure he was actually real. His lips met mine and the moon melted the crazy world away.

  Fifteen

  Aidan encouraged me to change my phone number. I wrestled with the idea of it for a couple days, but finally, I decided to do it. To my surprise, it was more liberating than I ever could have imagined. No more letting Paige make me feel like an animal at the zoo. No more Matt treating me like a piece of rancid meat. And I still had yet to give the new number to my aunt. Or my mom. Now they could experience that empty feeling in the pit of their stomachs when I wasn’t there for them. If they even noticed.

  It’s not like I totally cut them off. They could still find me online. After a couple of days without any messages, I told myself I didn’t care and stopped checking.

  I’d just got back to the house after my first interview for a CNA job. Since I graduated last week, my days were totally consumed with finding a job. It was time for me to start earning my keep, and try to pay Aidan back for his incredible generosity. I was pretty sure he wouldn’t take any money from me, but it didn’t mean I wasn’t going to try to give it to him.

  Why couldn’t Aidan be awake? Flittering around the house, I kept finding myself outside his door, with my hand on his doorknob. Patience, Kyndra. Even though I was so anxious to tell him about the interview, he’d be much more excited about it if I didn’t wake him up out of a sound sleep. It wasn’t like my news couldn’t wait another hour or so.

  I was pretty sure I aced the interview. It was an entry level job, of course, a floating position at one of the local hospitals. It started off part time, with a reevaluation after a month. Once I was full time, I got benefits, vacation time, and tuition reimbursement. But the best part of the job was they desperately needed people for the overnight shifts. The lady who interviewed me eyes lit up when I said I was very interested in working nights.

  Or so I hoped. I kept staring at my phone, hoping for news. If I got this job, there’d be no more dancing outside of Aidan’s door like he’d locked me out of the bathroom. We’d be on the same schedule. Finally settling in my bedroom, I leaned back against my pillow and pictured myself crawling into bed with him after a long night at work, and being able to sleep with his arm slung around my stomach. When I opened my eyes, the room just felt empty.

  I jumped when my phone rang. It was the lady who interviewed me. Pending the results of a drug test, the job was mine! I had to cover my mouth with my hand to not scream when I hung up.

  Come on, Aidan, wake up. We had celebrating to do.

  Instead, the closest I could get to Aidan right now was reading one of his books. A Piece of My Heart laid on my nightstand, open to the place I left off on New Years’ Eve. Why hadn’t I picked it back up? I could say that I’d been really busy with school, reading my textbooks and writing up my clinical reports. Or that I’d been actively participating in my own hot bedroom scenes in the few hours Aidan and I were both awake. But the truth of the matter is, the book was freaking me out.

  Everything Aidan and I did echoed David and Talis. It had to be a coincidence. Aidan didn’t even write that book, since it came out before he took over the franchise. He had never been shy about saying I reminded him of Marielle, but in the book, David felt the same way about Talis. The more I read, the more I felt like I was going crazy.

  This wasn’t the first time I read the book, so I knew what happened. David realized that Talis couldn’t replace Marielle, and that he needed to continue his search for her. He created a mate for Talis, to make it easier for him to walk away from her. But Talis didn’t want to live forever without David. She took her anger out on her new mate, Cash, swearing to make his eternity a living hell. David swore he’d never make another vampire again.

  But searching for Marielle made David a lonely vampire, and his failed attempts at finding his beloved were chronicled in the many other books in the series. I ran my hand along their bindings on the bookshelf, then moved to the living room, hoping my next read would pick me.

  My eyes fell to the cluttered end table beside his chair. Aidan had printed out the m
anuscript he was working on, so he could make notes before editing it. I’d asked him why he’d bothered to do it, since he had it all right on the computer. He told me that not only did he ‘see’ the book better in print, making it easier to edit, but that holding the book in his hands made it come to life for him in a way it never could on the computer. Call me old-fashioned, but I had to agree with him there. I just loved the way a book felt. I’d tried to use the e-reader that Paige gave me, but it just wasn’t the same.

  I tiptoed over to the table, as if I was sneaking up on the book, like it could run away from me if it knew I was coming for it. I stared at the cover, clean with just the title, Silent Night, and Allison’s name underneath. Aidan never got the acclaim for his books, it had to be filtered through an imaginary person. It had to be frustrating for him. I wanted everyone to know he was the one behind those stories. I hadn’t even told Paige. It didn’t seem fair.

  I perched on the edge the chair cushion, still afraid to touch anything. Sliding back in Aidan’s chair felt traitorous, knowing what I planned to do. I’d never sat there without him in it. The leather was battered and worn, and the blanket folded over the back of the chair slid down on my shoulders like a warning. It smelled like his cologne. I spread it out over my lap, picked up the manuscript, and settled in to read.

  My heart thumped in my chest. I was the first person to lay eyes on this book for the pure enjoyment of reading it. Who got to say that? It felt different, reading a book in such a raw form, and knowing the author. I wondered if I’d pick up any of subtle nuances in the story, and be able to smile at them like an inside joke. I turned to the first chapter, and imagined Aidan’s voice telling me the story.

  It had been a long time since I’d asked God for anything, but I needed a miracle. I was so tired. Of searching. Of disappointment. Of my never ending life, alone.

  If I wanted a payoff in this bargain, I needed to show Him I believed. Still, I expected nothing. I had no other plans in coming to this service than to sing praise to His son and to celebrate His birthday. But on this Christmas Eve night, God finally answered my prayer.

  She sat alone at the back of the church, her jacket a crumpled heap behind her back like a cushion, twirling her long dark ponytail. Her eyes darted to every family that sat down around her. I could almost taste her envy. In this life, she was just as lonely as me.

  No one sat near her, another of my prayers answered. She barely looked like more than a girl, but her hardened expression was not one of innocence. It sent a clear message that she didn’t want to be bothered. All of her body language was as hard as the pew she sat on. She adjusted the black top that hung off of her thin shoulders. What had happened to my beloved?

  I almost walked out of the church. My mind surely had to be playing tricks on me. I couldn’t really be seeing this. Her. I sat at the edge of a row and watched her while I worked up my nerve. Making the sign of the cross as I crossed the center aisle, I approached her.

  “I was hoping I’d see you here.” What did I just say? The girl jumped away from me, her jaw dropped. Of course she was scared. I was exactly the kind of person she was trying to keep away.

  “I don't think I know you. Do I?" She sounded apologetic as she looked me over. No recognition. What did I expect? "I'm kind of embarrassed if I do."

  She didn’t run. I still had a chance to save this disaster. "I'm sorry. Maybe I thought you were someone else? I'm David." I held out my hand, hoping she’d take it. It had been so long since I touched her. She hesitated before reaching for it. I wanted to melt, having her hand in mine. Would she notice the chill from my skin? Careful not to squeeze her too hard, I didn’t want to break her bones. I never wanted to let her go.

  “I’m Kyndra,” She studied my face, her lips opened in a little gasp. Her gaze lingered a little too long, and I took the opportunity to watch her take it all in.

  “I know.“ I tested her limits, just to see what she’d do. She could have gotten up and moved to another pew, or worse, left the church. Would I have followed her? Or would I let her walk out of my life again?

  Never.

  She picked up the hymn book and thumbed through it. “Have you been here for Midnight Mass before? It's a beautiful service,“ I continued, making small talk in hopes that she would relax. Marielle hadn’t trusted me when she met me the first time, a peasant girl separated from her family by my miliary unit, and I knew I had to build that trust all over again.

  My whole body shook from the shock of the words on the page. I turned back to the beginning, just to make sure I’d read the words correctly. They were the same, but they felt like a dream sequence.

  Aidan made no secret I’d inspired him to write, but this was a word for word account of our first encounter. I flipped forward, the book continued to read like a diary of our lives since that night. Except Aidan called himself David and he was convinced the character that shared my name was the reincarnation of his beloved wife, Marielle.

  Kyndra punctuated finishing her Shirley Temple by picking up the plastic spear in her glass and pulling the maraschino cherries from it with her teeth. The movement mesmerized me. I stared at her lips. I could smell the fruit and I knew she’d taste like cherries.

  I hadn’t kissed her yet, and the temptation threatened to drive me insane. Need pulsed inside my skull, and Kyndra’s excitement and sense of wonder intoxicated me that night.

  The band began playing again. An excuse to touch her. I held out my hand. “Can I have this dance?“

  Her hands should have been softer. I brushed my fingers over her palm, chapped from the cold. I’d make sure she’d never have to want for anything again.

  When we reached the dance floor, Kyndra stiffened and looked nervously at the couples swirling around us. I didn’t see anyone but her, her lacy dress skimming her milky skin, her dark hair threatening to explode out of its restraint. I barely put my hands on her hips, not trusting myself to just dance. She rested her hands lightly on my shoulders and began swiveling her hips under my touch. Feeling her body move like this, so close to mine, was overwhelming. I pulled her in, then picked her up and swung her in a circle to stop myself from losing control.

  She shrieked with laughter, then relaxed and started dancing. Watching her move, having her warm body so close to mine, was heaven.

  “Do you want to go out on the deck?“ I asked, my lips so close to her neck. I wanted her all to myself. Away from the crowd.

  “It’s almost midnight.” She looked a little sad, my heart sank. “Will we miss the countdown?”

  Our new beginning knew no time. “We’ll hear it.” Not knowing if that was true or not. Drunken revelers blocked my way. I was so anxious to get through the crowd, I had to concentrate on not drawing attention to myself. Not making any movements to let them know who I really was.

  Kyndra gasped, looking out at the Boston skyline, lights twinkling like suspended snowflakes. Her breath clouded around her in a halo. “It’s so beautiful,” she said. None of it was as breathtaking as she was.

  “It is.” I turned her face to mine. She tensed, just slightly, her teeth grazing her bottom lip in a way that made me want to bite it. She relaxed, and her dark hazel eyes met mine. If I had ever doubted myself before, I knew at this very moment beyond a shadow of a doubt, this was my beloved.

  Her eyes darted back to the lounge, my heart threatening to shatter when she pulled her eyes away from me. The countdown had begun.

  “Happy New Year, Kyndra.” I wouldn’t let her go. “Here’s to new beginnings.”

  “To new beginnings,” she whispered and smiled at me. That was all I needed.

  I pulled her in close to me, my hand wanting to pull her hair free from the bun and let it whip around wildly in the wind. I brushed my lips against hers, waiting for her to welcome me. I hadn’t expected to be so afraid to kiss her. If she rejected me, I’d be done. When her lips parted slightly, she sighed as I nipped her lip, then took her invitation to come inside. Warm and sweet,
and everything I’d waited so long for, I never wanted to let her go. Her lips moved against mine, wanting, needing more, and I wanted to give her everything, be her everything.

  Blood thundered in my ears, and tears streamed down my face. I didn’t think there was any way to make that night more beautiful in my memory, but being able to live it through Aidan’s eyes was the most priceless gift anyone could ever give me. Even if Aidan thought of me of nothing more than a vessel of Marielle’s spirit, I knew for certain he loved me more than I ever thought could be possible.

  “What are you doing?” I jumped at Aidan’s sharp words. I hadn’t looked at anything but the words he put on the page since I picked up the book.

  “I wanted to read your book.“ Just one look at him and I knew I had done something I shouldn’t have. Why wouldn’t he want me to see this? It was the most beautiful thing anyone could have ever done for me.

  “I wasn’t ready for you to see that yet.”

  He snatched the heavy binder from my lap, hugging it to his chest. He didn’t seem to know where to go, since I was in his chair, under his blanket, reading his secrets. “I wanted to tell you about it before you saw it.“

  “Why? I lived it.“ I got up and threw myself on the couch in protest to being scolded. Overreact much, Aidan?

  “Exactly. It’s not fiction.“ He sighed, taking his place in the chair I vacated, but still not looking settled.

  His words echoed in my brain, not quite making sense. What was he trying to tell me? “Some of it has to be fiction. What part of it is not fiction?“

  I could see him swallow, hard. “I changed my name to David.“ He watched my face for the reaction I tried like hell to hold in. “Everything else is true.“

  Throwing my arms out to my sides, I rolled my eyes. Why did he need to hide behind this fictional facade? Was he afraid of rejection? He should know by now I wouldn’t run from him. His truth couldn’t be worse than mine.

 

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