by Dyanne Davis
“Hamid?”
“Enjoy the wedding, Heaven. I’m speaking of the future, not of today.” He gave her a slow smile and then ran his fingers through her hair. “I love your hair,” he whispered softly.
* * *
Since going to the wedding with Hamid things had changed between them. So much so, that Heaven had asked a man out on a date. Yes, she was falling for Hamid, but after his comment about her living in Pakistan, she knew it was time to put a stop to the fantasy before they both got hurt.
Heaven was anxious she’d ignored Hamid’s question several times when he’d asked her what was wrong. They were going way past where they ever intended to go, and she had to do something to get them back on track. When the phone rang, she jumped and saw Hamid looking at her strangely. He knew, she thought.
She went to answer. When she came back, she turned to Hamid. “I have a date, he’ll be here in fifteen minutes, sorry, we have to end the session early.”
“Didn’t you know you had a date when I asked if I could come over?”
“Yes, but I guess I forgot to mention it.”
“Forgot? Or are you trying to make me jealous?”
“Not jealous, Hamid.”
“Then are you intending to send me a message, hands off? Is your date black, Heaven?”
She ignored that. “Why are you making this more difficult? Why can’t you just go?”
“Heaven, you know how I feel about you. I’m in love with you, and I believe you love me.”
“We’ve never spoken about love, Hamid.”
“That doesn’t make it any less real. We’ve never spoken about breathing, yet we do.”
“There, do you see what I mean? This is what we have between us, Hamid. We fight, and occasionally we have fun, then we fight some more.”
“Call your date and tell him not to come.”
“I will do no such thing.” Heaven glared at Hamid. “You’re the most…I don’t know what you are, Hamid, but I do know you’re getting on my nerves. Stop trying to tell me what to do.”
“I love you, Heaven.”
This wasn’t love. Heaven thought about Brandon; she’d loved him. They’d finished each other’s sentences. They had never fought, not even when he’d dumped her. She’d been hurt and angry but they didn’t fight.
Yet she fought with Hamid, over everything. She suddenly thought of Mrs. Reed and the words the patient had said to her before she’d died. She said her marriage of sixty years had been successful because she and her husband fought.
Heaven glanced at Hamid; nothing had changed between them except their feelings. Their different backgrounds made for automatic culture clash, and clash they did. But Heaven stood firm by her decision. She had more than enough drama in her life. To think of going to Pakistan with Hamid would only complicate it more.
“Heaven, I will not beg.”
“I didn’t ask you to.”
“I wish to be more than your friend.”
“And in a few months you’re leaving the States for good. Didn’t you tell me those are your plans? Have you changed your mind?”
“No.”
“Then you have your answer.”
“You could marry me, come to my country with me. You would be welcome.”
“Why do you think I would leave my home and go to a place where I don’t even speak the language?”
“Stop being ignorant, Heaven. Most of the people in my country speak English. Our schools teach students more than one language. How about you? What other language can you speak?”
“I’m sick of your calling me ignorant. There may be some words in the English language you don’t understand, but that isn’t one of them. I know you know what you’re saying. And for your information, I can talk turkey,” Heaven said, between clenched teeth. “Gobble-o tobble-o hobble-e lobble-lobble.”
“What’s does that nonsense mean?”
“It means go to hell,” Heaven said, and started toward the door when the doorbell rang. Hamid caught her arm, stopping her in her tracks.
“If you don’t tell me right this second that you love me I’m going to call my father and ask him to contact a matchmaker to find me a bride. When I leave this country, either I leave with you as my wife, or I leave and go home and get married. If that happens, I will not return. Think carefully, Heaven. Don’t answer me out of anger.”
“I’m not angry, Hamid,” Heaven hissed. “Good luck, congratulations, and invite me to the wedding.” Heaven snatched her arm away quickly and opened the door for him to leave. “Goodbye, Hamid.”
He glared at her but left. She heard him speaking to her date, telling him to have a good time, as if he had that right. Heaven was glad Hamid was gone. She would also be glad when he left for good. That was exactly what she needed, Hamid out of the country. To think he actually thought he could force her to tell him she loved him. That wasn’t something that came after hearing a threat. Yes, him leaving would be just what she needed. What she wanted was a different story.
Chapter Eight
Heaven’s mouth dropped opened. She ignored the customary bow before entering the dojo and stormed over to where Hamid was sparring. It had been two weeks since he’d stormed out of her house. Not a word from him, not a call, nada, and now here he was in her sanctum. She yanked on his arm. “What are you doing here?”
He shrugged his shoulder. “Practicing.”
“Don’t get cute, you know what I mean. Why are you in my school?”
“It’s been my school for over a month. I’m taking lessons.”
“I told you I didn’t want you here.”
Heaven was angry. This was hers. She’d not allowed Brandon to take it from her, and she wouldn’t allow Hamid to do it. “Leave,” she ordered him. “Now,” she said more sharply.
“No,” Hamid answered, his eyes narrowing into slits. “Who do you think you are? Why I ever bothered to fall in love with you is a mystery. You’re a nasty, sharp-tempered little shrew. Karate is meant to teach discipline. You should know that, Heaven. I do, and I’ve only been taking it for a month.”
Before Hamid could say another word, he felt his arm being yanked forward and Heaven’s hip slamming into his right side. The next thing he knew he was landing on the floor with a sharp thud. He stared up from the floor at Heaven in disbelief. He outweighed her by a hundred pounds and he was more than a foot taller, yet she had thrown him as easily as…
Hamid didn’t know, he couldn’t think. He shook his head a little to clear it but remained on the floor, aware of the commotion of the other students running toward them, offering him a hand up. He was also aware of the scowl on Heaven’s face, then of the sensei finally coming from the other side of the dojo, taking one look and dragging Heaven from the building.
Hamid should have been embarrassed, but that wasn’t what he was feeling. He was proud of Heaven. He shouldn’t have spoken to her in that manner, not in front of the entire class.
Finally, he accepted a hand up and gave a lopsided grin at the person helping him. “I guess I need a bit more practice,” he joked. “I never saw that coming.”
* * *
Heaven glanced across the room and saw the sensei staring at her. His anger was obvious. Before he could come to her, she started to walk toward the office but he stormed outside beckoning her to follow. Her stomach clenched. She wished she’d known he was in the dojo, but doubted if it would have made a difference in her action.
“Talk, Heaven, or so help me I’m kicking you out of the school. What has gotten into you? Hamid is a white belt. You could have hurt him. What were you thinking?”
“I wasn’t thinking, sensei, I’m sorry.”
“Sorry is not good enough, Heaven, not in this case. Hamid is right. You’re undisciplined, and now you’re behaving like a bully. I can’t have that in my dojo. You’re no longer welcome here.”
“Please, sensei, I’m sorry, don’t ban me from the school.” Tears formed in Heaven’s eyes, but she refused
to let them fall. She didn’t allow others to witness her crying; that was not a part of her. She watched as the teacher paced back and forth on the sidewalk, his face contorted in thought, looking like a storm cloud.
“You need to apologize to Hamid.”
She’d known that was coming, and she groaned low. “I’ll do it,” she said. “I’ll call him.”
“No, you will do it in the dojo. You humiliated him there and you will make amends there. And you…with your next breath you will tell me what’s going on.”
“I’m not a bully. Hamid and I are…Well, I guess we’re friends, sort of. The night you were trying to teach me a lesson by having the student push the punching bag into me, Hamid came over to my apartment. He’s a doctor, so of course he noticed I’d been hurt.” Heaven shrugged her shoulder in order to make light of the situation. The look in the instructor’s eyes told her to continue. “I told Hamid that I took karate, and he asked me the name of my school. He said he wanted to take lessons. I wouldn’t give the name to him, but he found out anyway. He could have gone someplace else; having him here makes me feel as if he’s trying to take over my life.”
“That’s no excuse.”
“I don’t want him here.”
“You do not get to choose the students.”
A lone tear slid down Heaven’s cheek. “This is a sanctuary for me. For Hamid, it’s only something he can take away from me.”
“He’s not trying to take the school, Heaven. He’s been coming for over a month. He’s a good student and a fast learner. He has never come when you’re here. This is a different night for you or he wouldn’t have been here.”
“How do you know that he’s trying to avoid me here?”
“Because the day he joined he mentioned your name.”
Heaven felt betrayed. She swallowed the sudden lump and closed her eyes for a moment; she didn’t want to look at the teacher. When she opened them, she looked instead at the traffic light a half block away, at the trees swaying gently with the evening breeze. She couldn’t let go of the feeling of betrayal.
At last Heaven turned back to face the sensei. “Why did you allow him to join?”
“Because he wants to learn. As for his being in your school, you need to let go of the pain, Heaven. You’ve kept it bottled up for so long that now it’s coming out when it shouldn’t. You can’t beat up on Hamid for the hurt Brandon caused you. If you’re angry with Brandon you should confront him.”
The sensei folded his hands. “But I don’t suggest you try that little maneuver on Brandon. He’s your equal.” He stared intently at her for a second. “Actually, Heaven, he’s much better. Brandon always remains focused. He doesn’t allow his anger to control him. Look at you. You should have earned your black belt a year ago. You don’t have it because you refuse to test for it. But you still have the skills, and you will not use those skills to intimidate my students.”
Heaven ground the palms of her hands against her eyes. “Hamid asked me to marry him.”
“And for that you attack him?”
Heaven smiled slowly. “It seemed a good enough reason at the time.”
“Are you in love with Hamid?”
“He says he’s in love with me.”
“That wasn’t my question. I asked if you love Hamid.”
“I think I might, but I’m not sure I want to. We do nothing but fight, sensei. From the day I met him we have fought. Can you imagine us together? Brandon and I loved each other for years. We never fought, and look what happened. A relationship between Hamid and me doesn’t stand a chance of surviving.”
“You can’t be sure, but it might be fun finding out.”
“Can I remain at the school if I apologize to Hamid?”
The teacher looked her over as he rubbed his chin with a closed fist. “If you do that and if you talk to Brandon. He’s the source of your pain. You need to address it, for if this happens again, I will not be moved by your pleas or your tears.”
“I didn’t cry.” Heaven looked at him in amazement. Surely one tear didn’t constitute crying.
“You were crying in your heart,” the teacher said and walked away. Heaven walked in the opposite direction. She would apologize to Hamid just as she’d promised, but there was still too much hostility in her to do it now.
Just the thought of confronting Brandon gave her a chill. She didn’t want to. She’d seen him several times with the white girl he’d left her for. She had to admit those times had filled her with rage.
She’d seen them fighting a couple of times and wondered why he’d left her for someone with whom he now seemed to have such a volatile life. No, they’d never fought, but at the moment she couldn’t get over wanting to best him in a ring. True, his skills were better and he was more disciplined, but it didn’t keep her from wanting to fight him.
* * *
It took two weeks for Heaven to venture back to the dojo. She didn’t know if Hamid would be there, given his schedule, but it was Wednesday night, the same night he’d been there before, so she decided to take her chances.
Heaven allowed a sigh to escape when she entered the dojo. She did the customary bow of respect to the dojo and spotted Hamid sparring with another student. She watched him for a moment before making her way to the office. He was getting good. She stood for a moment while the sensei finished the papers he was working on.
“It took you two weeks in order to come back?” he asked.
Heaven shrugged her shoulder. “I’m here now.”
“What about Brandon? He’s the reason you took your hostilities out on Hamid. Are you going to talk to him?”
“Yes, that was our agreement.”
“When?”
“I don’t know, but I give you my word. I will talk to him.”
“Have you apologized to Hamid?”
“Not yet.”
The sensei rose from his chair. “Then I think it’s time,” he said.
“You’re going to make a big production out of this, aren’t you? You could wait until class is over.”
She saw the man smiling at her. “I could, but I won’t. What fun would that be? Besides, you could use a dose of humility. Hamid has been taking quite a ribbing about your kicking his butt. Now I think it’s you who should eat a little of that crow. Come on, Heaven,” the teacher said and went out to the dojo.
“Attention please,” he said, immediately gathering the attention of the instructors and students. “Heaven is here to rejoin us, but before she does, she has something to say. Heaven,” he said, moving away and giving the floor to her.
Heaven could feel her face burning with shame. She didn’t want to do this, but she had no choice if she wanted to remain in the school that had kept her sane in the past year.
She cleared her throat. “I regret my slight transgression of two weeks ago.” Her head snapped up and she saw Hamid watching her intently.
“Hamid, I apologize for using superior power in order to bring you to the mat. It won’t happen again.” Heaven looked toward the sensei.
“You may rejoin the class,” he said.
“Was that supposed to be an apology?” Hamid asked in a loud voice, bringing the attention of all in the room to rest on him.
“For Heaven it is, and we will all accept it.” The sensei spoke with authority. “Heaven, lead the class,” he ordered and returned to the office.
Great, Heaven thought. She knew he was doing this just to teach her a lesson. No one in the class wanted her to be in charge, not tonight anyway, but they were bound by the sensei’s rules, same as she was. She saw a hint of malice in several of the instructors’ eyes, and that made her want to laugh. They didn’t think she was up to the challenge. She’d show them.
When the class was over, everyone was soaking wet with sweat and too tired to do more than look at Heaven. She smiled and went to the punching bag and hit it several times, then kicked high in the air. She was showing off, and she knew it, but she was also sending a message. S
he might be little but she was not one to be messed with. Heaven stuffed her gear into her bag and walked out. Walking home always calmed her down.
High on the adrenaline rush, all Heaven could think of was the exhausted state she’d left Hamid in. She doubted if he’d ever want to take a class from her again. The image of his body sweating and going through the torture of intense exercise quickened her step. Lost in her thoughts, she didn’t notice that the shadow on the brick building was actually a man. When she did, it was too late. He was in front of her and pulling on her gym bag.
Thoughts whirled in her mind. She could let the bag go; it had nothing of real value in it. And even if it had, her life was more important. She knew this but rational thought did not translate into action.
“You little bitch, let it go.”
Heaven’s eyes flickered, then rested on the man’s face. She froze. She tried to make her body move, drop the bag, kick him, punch him, anything, but she couldn’t move.
A meaty fist slammed into her eye, sending blinding hot pain from the socket throughout her skull. She stumbled backwards, still clutching the bag.
“Bitch,” the man yelled angrily. Blinking her rapidly swelling eye, Heaven saw a man’s fist smash into her assailant’s face, then a couple more punches followed by a full round house kick. When she got a good look at the man, it was Hamid.
“Hamid,” she said softly, not thinking. Hamid turned toward her, taking his attention off the assailant. In that second the man ran off. Heaven could see Hamid’s indecision about giving chase or remaining with her. He shrugged and came to her side. Heaven turned her back to him. The pain in her eye was blinding, and she didn’t want him to know.
* * *
Hamid was breathing hard, thankful that he’d been walking the same route as Heaven. Once again, fate had put them on the same path. When he’d first glimpsed the man, he’d thought it was someone Heaven knew. When he realized what was happening, for a second he’d paused, waiting for Heaven to flatten the guy. When she appeared immobile, it had momentarily rooted him to the spot. Then the certain knowledge of what was going to happen to Heaven broke the spell. Hamid ran faster than he ever had in his life, the oxygen pumping to his lungs. He felt a burning in his calves that traveled upwards to his thighs and ran even faster. He had to save Heaven.
