Lilly jogged up the stairs to their bedroom. Empty. Their bathroom door was shut, but no light shone from under the door, and she didn’t hear any water running. Still, she knocked softly. “Mom?” No answer. Growing slightly nervous since she had no idea what kind of mood Stan had been in when he got home, Lilly rushed out to the hallway and looked in both directions. Where were they?
“Mom?” Lilly hurried down the stairs, calling out every few seconds. “Mom?”
Crash!
She turned toward the loud sound and noticed the basement door cracked open with the lights peeking through. What could they be doing downstairs besides laundry? Lilly went to the doorway and listened.
“Well, if you didn’t eat like such a pig, your shirts wouldn’t be stained.” Mom sounded as if she spoke through gritted teeth.
“That’s what laundry detergent is for … if you were smart enough to know how to use it, anyway. You ruined my shirts, just like you ruin everything.”
“No, Stan.” Her voice maintained an even tone. “I didn’t ruin your shirts. Grease ruined your shirts.”
“Oh boy. Here we go. Miss Smarty-pants. You really think you’re clever, don’t you?” Stan begged for a fight. Even worse, Mom took the bait—as usual.
That’s it. If they wanted to act like that, they’d have to do it without an audience. Lilly decided to leave. How to do it with some damage control, though? She could drive, but even though she had her driver’s license, taking the car was a sure ticket to major trouble. Call Jason to pick her up? No way. That would be much worse. What about her bike? No, a little too cold to have the wind whipping her face on a bicycle. Looked like she would walk the mile and a half to the church. She didn’t mind; the walk would do her good.
Lilly pulled a notepad and pen from the drawer by the refrigerator and wrote:
Mom, I didn’t want to interrupt to ask for a ride, so I went ahead and walked to church. I have my cell phone if you need me. I’ll call for a ride home. Have a nice night.
Love, Lilly
Lilly put the note under the apple-shaped magnet on the refrigerator that Mom once used to display Lilly’s art projects. She picked up her shoulder bag and grabbed her coat on the way out. She slipped her arms into the sleeves as the front door closed behind her. Freedom. It might cost her, but for the moment, it was worth it.
Lilly’s breath came out in little white puffs as she hurried along the sidewalk on the dark autumn evening. She felt exhilarated to be powering along, each step taking her farther from the chaos at home. How long would it take for them to notice she left? Would they come after her?
Ahh. She breathed the air deep into her lungs. Would Mom be okay? Her steps slowed, and she looked back toward her house, which had faded too far in the distance to see. Whatif Stan hurt her? Lilly couldn’t do anything to stop it anyway. She could call the police again like she did last year, but Mom would just deny any problems. Should she call Grams? No. Lilly shook her head and cleared her mind of the worries. She needed to leave it behind her and go be with Jason. She couldn’t fight the battle herself. If her mom wanted to keep at it, Lilly couldn’t do a thing about it.
Lilly stepped through the trees that lined the parking lot of the church. Not quite Thanksgiving yet, she was surprised to see colored, blinking Christmas lights through the garden window as she approached and peered in. Teens milled about the basement youth room, hanging decorations, stringing popcorn, signing Christmas cards. It looked like a scene right out of a movie. Her spirits suddenly buoyed, Lilly hurried inside.
“Hey! What’s going on here?” Lilly dropped her purse on a metal folding chair. Christmas music boomed through the sound system. Lights were strung over anything that stood still. Mulled cider gave off a tangy-sweet aroma from the slow cooker on the countertop.
“Hi, Lilly.” Heather, the youth pastor’s bubbly wife, popped up from the other side of the counter, her brown curls bouncing. “Zach and I decided to go festive tonight. Everyone seemed in the holiday spirit.” She went to the sink, set down a pitcher, and started to fill it with water. “Grab an ornament and jump in.” She grinned, revealing her deep dimples.
“I sure will.” Lilly looked around the room. “Have you seen Jason Peters yet?”
“Nope. Not yet.” Heather grinned. “You two getting serious?”
“Yeah. I think so.” Lilly sighed. “If my parents would lighten up and let me out of the house, it’d be a lot better.”
“Lilly, I don’t want to overstep my boundaries….” She paused as though considering her words. “Just … just be careful. Don’t rush things. You’re still young.”
“I know. I’m being careful, re–” Lilly gasped and squeezed Heather’s forearm. “He’s here. I’ll talk to you later.” She hurried to the door where Jason stood unzipping his jacket and looking around the room.
“Wow.” Jason whistled. “You look great.” He reached around and gave her a discreet side hug and then added an extra squeeze before he released her. “I was afraid you wouldn’t be able to come for some reason.”
“That sure looked like a possibility. The parentals were fighting, as usual.” Lilly tried to look nonchalant. “So I left.” She reached up and picked a string off Jason’s shirt, then gestured toward the snack table. “Thirsty?”
“Hold it.” Jason opened his eyes wide. “You left?”
Lilly nodded. “Yep. Left.”
“You didn’t take the car. Tell me you didn’t.” Jason shook his head.
“No. I’m not that stupid. I needed to get out of there and wasn’t about to jump into the fray by asking for a ride.” Lilly walked toward the snacks with Jason at her heels. “They’d already given me permission, so I don’t see what the big deal is.”
At that moment, her cell phone vibrated in her pocket. She pulled it out and looked at the touch screen. Mom. Lilly glanced up at Jason, suddenly doubting the wisdom of her decision. She bit her lip and pressed the green button. “Hi, Mom. What’s up?” She forced her voice to sound natural.
“Lilly? You walked all the way to church?” Mom’s tight voice sounded fearful.
Lilly took a calming breath. “It’s not that far. It felt good to get some fresh air.”
Jason grabbed her hand.
“But … I told you I’d drive you.” Mom sounded defensive.
“I know. I didn’t want to interrupt.” Don’t make a big deal out of it. “Where’s Stan? Is everything okay?”
“I’m fine.” Mom hesitated. “Are you okay? Do I need to come pick you up now?”
“No, I’m good, really. But where’s Stan?”
“I don’t know. He took off in his car.”
Could he be on his way to the church? Lilly looked at the door in panic as she imagined Stan storming in there and yanking her out by the sleeve of her shirt. “Did he see my note?”
“No. He came right up the basement stairs and left.” Mom sighed. “He doesn’t know you left the house, and I’m not telling him. But you can’t do this again, Lill. Okay?”
Phew. “Okay, Mom. I promise.” She paused a moment. “Do you want me to come home?”
Jason squeezed her hand and shook his head.
“No. You stay. Might as well have some fun. I’m going to take a shower, and then I’ll pick you up at ten o’clock like we’d planned.”
Lilly looked at her silent phone and then up at Jason. “She hung up on me. She didn’t exactly sound mad—more like … um … defeated.”
Should she call back and try to talk her? Maybe she should go home. Lilly looked at Jason, unsure of what to do next. No, she decided after a moment. Mom only wanted her space now. She probably had the shower running already.
Jason rubbed the top of her hand with his thumb and shrugged.
Heather walked over and smiled. “Hi, Jason. Good to see you.” Her face darkened a bit as she searched their eyes. “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah. We’re fine. Just had to take a phone call from my mom.” Lilly pulled her hand fro
m Jason’s grasp. “We’re ready to help. Where do you want us?”
Chapter 5
TOO LITTLE TOO LATE
Lilly shivered when she walked into the cold kitchen after school on Monday. She went to the thermostat on the wall and adjusted it a touch—too much and she’d have to listen to Stan bellyache about the gas bill. She turned to the refrigerator and found a piece of paper under the magnet on the door.
Lill, we’ll be home with dinner around 5:30. We’re having a family meeting tonight. The meeting might take a while, so try to get your homework done before we get back.
Love,
Mom and Stan
Great, what could that mean? A family meeting? Maybe Mom and Stan were separating. It would be for the best. Sure, things would be difficult financially, but Lilly could get a job. She’d do that to help out. Plus, she’d probably be allowed to date Jason and have more freedom—only Stan stood in the way of that. The best part would be that Mom would get some of herself back; she’d finally have peace. No. Lilly shook her head. Letting her thoughts run away like that never did her any good. She’d just have to wait and see what the meeting was about.
A couple of hours later, Lilly slammed her Spanish book shut. Paisley, asleep on top of Lilly’s feet, jumped at the loud noise. “Sorry, Paise.” Over four years of studying Spanish and Lilly only knew enough to order food, find a bathroom, and inquire about a person’s day. But what did it matter in real life if she could conjugate the verb to drink or count to a thousand?
Now what? She looked at the clock on the microwave. 5:11. She had a history test on Friday, but it would be a waste of time to study now—she wouldn’t be able to concentrate. Instead, she pushed her chair back and stood up, stretching her arms far above her head as she yawned. She’d set the table. Maybe if the house was nice and neat, things would go well.
5:14. Lilly wiped off the table and put the fruit basket back in the center. Her fuzzy sock stuck to a sticky patch of dried orange juice on the floor, so she wiped it up. Lilly stepped over Paisley, who had moved to the heat vent, to get the place mats from the buffet drawer in the dining room. That little dog sure could snore.
5:25. Table set—even place mats. Glasses filled—water for Mom and Stan, Coke for herself. Paisley’s food and water bowls topped off. Nothing left to do but wait. Lilly sat down in a kitchen chair where she could watch the driveway. Wait. Should she have set the dining room table for dinner instead of the kitchenette? They hardly ever ate together, and she didn’t know what they were eating, so it was a tough call. Probably didn’t matter. Either way, Stan would find something to complain about.
The garage door roared to life, and Lilly’s stomach flip-flopped. Why was she so nervous? After a minute, Stan came through the kitchen door first, laughing. He held it open for Mom and took the grease-stained Portillos package she held in her hand.
“Thanks, dear.” Mom smiled sweetly at Stan who put the bag on the counter.
Dear? It sure didn’t look like this would be the big divorce announcement she’d been expecting. “What’s going on?” Lilly tried to act normal even though her insides were churning.
Mom started to unpack the food. “Nothing, Lill. How was your day?” She playfully swatted Stan’s hand away as he tried to steal a fry. “Hold your horses, mister.”
Hold your horses, mister? Was she serious? Lilly grew more nauseated as she watched their sickening display. The smell of grease didn’t help matters either. “So what’s this family meeting about?” She studied them as they got everything out for dinner.
Stan put the ketchup on the table and smiled. “Let’s get settled, and we’ll talk over dinner, okay?”
Uh-oh. The calm before the storm? Lilly didn’t say another word until everyone sat at the table. They all had a thick, juicy Italian beef sandwich with plenty of sweet peppers, a big pile of french fries, and a puddle of ketchup. Lilly salted and peppered her ketchup—just the way she liked it—then added more pepper to her fries. Comfort food. She sure didn’t feel very comfortable.
Each of them took a bite in silence. What were they going to talk about? How long would she have to wait to find out? “Mom? Stan? What’s going on? What’s this meeting about?”
Mom wiped the corners of her mouth with a napkin and looked at Stan. “Honey?”
Honey? Lilly’s eyes twitched as she forced them to stay in place even though they wanted to roll to the back of her head. Disgusting.
Stan cleared his throat. “Lilly … I’m sorry.”
She choked on a mouthful of soda. “Sorry? For what?” She still had the straw in her mouth.
“I’m sorry for the way I’ve treated you and your mom. And I’m sorry for the way I’ve made your home an unhappy one.”
Seriously? He didn’t actually think he could apologize and then everything would be fine, did he? She glanced at her mom who sat still, looking down at her hands.
“I don’t expect this to fix everything. I know it’s going to take a lot of work. But I started seeing a counselor. I’m willing to do whatever it takes.”
Could it be a start? Could he ever change? Lilly doubted it.
Stan cleared his throat again. “In fact, I want all three of us to see this counselor. We need to be put back together as a family.”
Whoa. You can’t put something back together that never existed. Lilly stared at Stan and thought about her next words while she chewed on her straw. She pried her eyes away from Stan without a word and turned toward her mom. “Mom? What do you think about all this?”
Mom’s shoulders raised and lowered as she heaved a heavy sigh. “Lill, I know you doubt Stan’s sincerity. Right?” She still didn’t look up.
“Why wouldn’t I?” Lilly spoke softly, trying not to anger Stan. But, really, it might be a good test.
“I suppose it’s natural. I hope you’ll give it a chance.” Mom finally glanced up at Lilly.
“Give ‘it’ a chance? What’s the it? Stan? Counseling? Peace? You?”
Mom sighed again. “Yes. All of it.”
Lilly twisted her hands in her lap. “That’s a pretty big request, Mom,” she whispered.
Stan cleared his throat. “I understand how you probably feel, Lilly. I hope you’ll work with us to put this family back together.”
Again with the back together. “Why Stan? Why now?”
Mom and Stan looked at each other; then Mom gazed up at the ceiling and exhaled a ragged breath.
“What’s going on, you guys? What’s this all about?” More games. When would it end?
“She’s going to find out sooner or later, Stan.” Mom spoke in a whisper.
Lilly’s eyes darted from Mom to Stan and back to Mom. “I’m starting to freak out a little. What is it?”
“Well, Lilly, your mom and I—we’re going to have a baby.” Stan sat back in his chair with a big grin on his face.
Lilly stared at him with her mouth wide open. She closed her mouth, opened it again. No words would come. She could imagine nothing worse. A baby? Mom and Stan? Together? “How? What are you going to …? When? Are you crazy? Did you plan for this to happen?” Lilly fired off her questions, not really expecting an answer to any of them.
“I’m already fourteen weeks.” Mom’s shoulders slumped, and she started to cry. “I’m sorry, Lilly. Really. It wasn’t planned. These things happen sometimes.”
“Why would you be sorry?” Stan turned to Mom and covered her tiny hand with his beefy paw. “It’s not like you’re doing this to spite her. A baby is a good thing.”
“Stan, things haven’t exactly been great around here for Lilly. I’m sure she’s worried about the way things will change and the kind of home this baby will have, too.” Mom pulled her hand away and rubbed her temples.
“Time will prove everything is going to change. I’m giving it—I’ve given myself—to God. You’ll see. It’s going to be okay—more than okay.”
A baby? She’d always wanted to be a big sister, but this meant Stan and Mom were
glued together. Mom, pregnant? What would this mean? It didn’t matter much. Lilly would leave for college in a year and a half. She’d pick one far away. But what if the baby needed her? Not really her problem. But … still.
She ate a french fry then shoved her plate away and stood up. She turned to her mom. “I love you, Mom. I hope you’re going to be okay…. I just … I can’t …” She shook her head and left the kitchen, hurrying away before they saw her tears.
Lilly couldn’t see very well past the flood that rose in her eyes. She made her way to her bedroom, grabbed her puffy down comforter, and climbed into her papasan chair. Cocooned in her favorite blanket, she curled up in a ball and let the tears come. If she’d felt like a third wheel before, she’d seen nothing yet. Lilly’sfamily was growing, but she’d never felt as alone as she did at that moment. Could she leave, move out, go to college, run away—anything?
Sniffling, she pulled a tissue out of the box on the floor by the chair and blew her nose. She wiped her eyes and tried to compose herself. Her phone vibrated in her pocket. Please be Jason. Lilly pulled her phone out and looked at the display. Oh, thank God.
“Hi Jase.” Lilly tried to sound normal.
“Hey … what’s wrong?”
“You can tell?”
“You sound like you’ve been crying. What’s happening?”
“I don’t know how to tell you this.” Lilly shivered and pulled the cover up around her chin. “Mom’s pregnant.”
“What?” he practically shouted. “Are you kidding me?”
Lilly started with a fresh round of sobs. “I wish.”
“Oh, Lill. I don’t know what to say.”
“I mean—it’s not the baby’s fault. But now Mom is stuck with Stan. And if he mistreats Mom, what will he do to a baby? A kid shouldn’t have to grow up in a house with so much fighting.”
“I know. What do they say about it?” Jason seemed at a loss for words.
“Mom and Stan? Well, Stan apologized for the way he’s been acting…. Oh, and he wants us all to go to counseling together.”
“Hey, that’s something. At least he’s aware that there’s a problem.”
Swept Away Page 14
