Long Way Home

by Vaughn, Ann

  “Well, you just come right over here and I will serve you up the best slice of chocolate creme pie you’ve ever had. I know that’s your favorite.”

  “Yes, ma’am, it is,” she replied, following her over to the booth by the main window, the same booth she always used to sit in when she came in for pie. When she sat down, though, her eyes were drawn down the street, to the Sheriff’s office, where Shane’s truck was parked out front.

  “Here you go, honey,” Miss Nettie said, then sat in the seat opposite her. “So, tell me, how was the Army? Mary said you were in the Middle East and that you’d been wounded at one point in the war.”

  Tessa took her first bite of pie and closed her eyes, savoring it. “Oh, my gosh, Miss Nettie, this is so good,” she said. Then, knowing she couldn’t avoid the question, she took a deep breath. “My convoy was ambushed in an IED attack. Shrapnel pierced my lower abdomen. The medics got to me immediately so it wasn’t as bad as it could have been. I resigned my commission after that and went to work for Gib at the FBI. He’d been my Commanding Officer for all but the last six months of my service.”

  “I hadn’t realized you’d joined the FBI.”

  Tessa raked her hand through her hair. “Yes...there’s...quite a bit that’s happened that very few know about.”

  “I saw you leave and Shane follow you out Friday night. Gracie told me that he ended things with Wendy.”

  “Did he?” she asked, her eyes again drawn toward the Sheriff’s office.

  “Honey, why did you stay away all these years? I thought you and Shane...well, I thought you two were perfectly matched.”

  “We were just kids. His life moved him one way, and mine took me in another.”

  “You were a good match. When you two were together, there was joy in both your faces. Shane hasn’t had that look in a long time; and it’s been worse since he’s been back here to stay. Something happened to him, Tessa. He’s hollow.”

  A tear rolled down Tessa’s cheek and Miss Nettie reached out to capture her hand.

  “I hurt him,” she admitted softly. “I sent him away.”

  “I suspected as much. You had found each other again?”

  Tessa nodded. “We were engaged...but, I’m not good for him, Miss Nettie. I’m a wreck. He deserves so much better.”

  “Better than you? Better than the one who has always been meant for him?”

  “I’m not...”

  “Honey, I’ve been around much longer than you. I’ve seen much more than you and trust me when I say that I’ve never seen two people more right for each other than you and my great-nephew.”

  “I wish I could believe that. I know he is the one for me, but I just don’t think I am the one for him. He may have been happy for a time when we were together, but trust me, for the most part, I’ve caused him nothing but grief.”

  Miss Nettie squeezed her hand. “No one said that life and love has to be perfect. There are going to be hard times and heartache on your road. That’s an inevitable part of life. But the good times far outnumber the bad, and if you look back at your history with Shane, the bad times were just bumps in the road. You have to have faith that the good will cancel out the bad. You have to believe that.”

  Tessa sighed. “That’s the problem. I’ve lost the ability to believe that.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Nearly two weeks after her first sighting of Shane at Miss Nettie’s, and her conversation with Miss Nettie, Tessa found herself at the town square gazebo once again, entwining elaborate sunflower garlands along its columns. Her mother had taken over the town’s seasonal decorations a couple of years back. Today, they were decorating for the late summer season. Sunflowers were going everywhere along the town’s two main streets. It was a lot of work but Tessa had to admit the results were phenomenal; no one else who’d been the town decorator prior to her mother ever put this much into it all. Tessa thought it was wonderful and added to the town’s charm.

  “Mary never ceases to amaze me with the things she comes up with,” Tessa heard from behind her. She looked over her shoulder to see Mrs. Shelmerdine standing at the gaze of the gazebo.

  “Hey, there, Mrs. Shelmerdine,” Tessa greeted her, offering a soft smile.

  “Hello, Tessa, I was just on my way to the Post Office and thought I’d come take a look. Your mother does such beautiful work.”

  “Yes, ma’am, she surely does.”

  “I heard your mother say that you were in Afghanistan when you were in the Army.”

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  “How exciting! I’m sure you have lots of fascinating stories.”

  “I was basically a glorified secretary. Not much to tell.”

  “Really? A secretary?”

  “Yes, to Mama’s fiancé, Glen.”

  “Is that right? I guess I didn’t realize you’d known him for that long.”

  “I met him right after I completed basics and was assigned to my first duty station. I worked in his office and when his secretary retired, I took over. Been with him ever since.”

  “He’s been so good for your mother. I’ve just seen her blossom over the last few months with him around. Did you ever imagine one day he would end up with your mother?”

  Tessa laughed. “I never imagined a scenario where they would ever meet...but Gib was always a father-figure to me, so I suppose it’s only natural that now it will be official.”

  “And what about you, Miss Tessa? Will you be settling down here? Staying?”

  “Hey, Tessa, Miz Shelmerdine,” Ivy Sinclair greeted them enthusiastically, stepping up to the gazebo. “Tessa, this looks amazing.”

  “I was just telling her that,” Mrs. Shelmerdine agreed.

  “Thanks. Mama worked hard on them.”

  “Last Christmas was my first year back...her decorations blew me away,” Ivy continued. “Oh, Miz Shelmerdine, Miss Nettie was looking for you. She said she had something for you.”

  “Oh, that’s right! I got so distracted by these beautiful sunflowers I forgot. Tessa, you give your mother my compliments on all of this, OK?”

  “I will.”

  “And you come by my store. Shopping is good for you.”

  “I’ll do that, too.”

  Tessa and Ivy watched Mrs. Shelmerdine rush off toward Miss Nettie’s. Ivy began laughing and Tessa shook her head, smiling.

  “Your timing is impeccable,” Tessa told her. “You saved me from having to discuss my future plans and possibly my love life with her. I owe you one.”

  “Good, because I actually had another reason for coming here, other than delivering Miss Nettie’s message.”

  Tessa hung the last of the garlands and began packing up her box of supplies.

  “Oh yeah? What would that be?”

  “I was wondering if you would want to get together some time, drinks and girl talk.”

  Tessa paused in packing her box. Of all the things she could have possibly imagined Ivy Sinclair coming to talk to her about, that certainly wasn’t one of them.

  “I’m sorry?”

  “Well, you know how it is...aren’t many single women our age around here. Just thought it would be nice to have someone to shop with and drink and talk about men with.” Both women’s heads turned when Shane’s Sheriff’s truck drove past them and parked at the Sheriff’s Office. “Would be a great way to take your mind off of things.”

  Tessa regarded Ivy for a moment. Although four years her junior, Ivy was usually around her group of friends when she was in high school. Tessa’s senior year, Ivy worked as an equipment manager for the Flag Corps, laying out flags during changes for their halftime shows. Her older brother, Steve, was Shane’s best friend growing up and usually Ivy was tagging along behind them. She didn’t recall that Ivy ever acted as if she had a crush on Shane, but then again, her mother said that Ivy and Shane had grown really close after he returned to Indian Springs.

  “There are those around town who have said that you and Shane had something going
for a while,” she hedged.

  Ivy smiled. “Shane is a sweetheart. He’s always been good to me. When he came back, he and I were in a similar state. He was reeling from you. I was the same over Reese. We leaned heavily on each other...as friends. I love Shane, but only as a brother. Believe me, it would have simplified both our lives if we could have been attracted to each other. We had a good laugh about that over pizza and beer one day...but my heart has always belonged to Reese...and his...well, you know.”

  “I appreciate your honesty,” Tessa said.

  “Look...it’s been a while for you, but you remember what life is like here. Any budding romance becomes the center of attention for the likes of Mrs. Shelmerdine and Miss Nettie and their crew. We live in a fish bowl here. So, I figure right now, with Reese and I butting heads and you and Shane dancing around each other, we’re in that fish bowl together. Might be better if we stuck together, don’t you think?”

  Tessa smiled and shook her head. “Princess Ivy and Tornado Tess...is this town ready for us?”

  Ivy again returned her smile. “Why not?”

  At that, Tessa laughed. “OK, sure,

  “Awesome. Oh, my brother is having a cookout tonight. Wanna come?”

  “Oh...wow...um...yeah, I’m not so sure I’m quite that ready to jump back in the whole social -”

  Ivy cut her off. “Why not? Best way to get a bandage off is to just rip it off fast. Don’t over-analyze, just close your eyes and jump.”

  “Easier said than done.”

  Ivy nodded in understanding. “I know. You’ll never know until you try, though, right?”

  Tessa sighed and closed her eyes a moment. Coming home to Indian Springs meant that she was trying to pick up the pieces of her life, and part of that was getting involved with people again, rather than shutting them out. In that sense, she knew Ivy was right.

  She took a deep breath. “OK, sure.”

  “Great. Be there at 6:00.”

  Tessa watched Ivy walk off, not sure exactly what she’d just gotten herself into. Ivy was the town darling; she definitely was not...and if word got out that she was the reason behind Shane’s obvious weight loss and other issues, she’d be even less of a favorite.

  She sighed as she headed back to the shop. A cookout at Steve Sinclair’s house was a guarantee to run into Shane. Avoiding him wasn’t an option and she figured it was time to try to find out if there was anything left between them...and if she could handle having a close relationship again.

  Ivy took a roundabout way to loop around town and go back toward Shane’s office so Tessa wouldn’t see her heading directly there after leaving her. She wasn’t sure how he would react to her interfering but at this point, she didn’t really care; she was tired of seeing him suffer.

  He was standing at the office door when she walked up, a look of wariness on his face.

  “Hey, how’s it going?” she asked as she walked in.

  “Save it,” he snapped, taking her upper arm and walking her back to his office. “You wanna tell me what you were doing out there with Tessa?”

  “I asked her if she’d like to meet me for drinks and girl talk sometime.”

  “Really?”

  “Yes, really. Most women my age in town are married. Would be nice to have someone single to hang out with.”

  He nodded but she could tell he wasn’t convinced.

  “What? You don’t agree?”

  “No...I mean, it’s not that...it’s...” His voice trailed off and he began to pace. “Tessa has been through so much in the last year. I mean...a lot. Traumatic stuff.”

  “I know that, Shane. Even more reason to get her involved in something, get her mind off things.”

  “Maybe,” he said absently.

  “She’s coming to Steve’s tonight.”

  He cursed under his breath and shook his head. “You just couldn’t resist, could you?”

  She flashed a huge smile at him. “Misery loves company. If I have to suffer with all the agony Reese is putting me through then you have to suffer through all your crap with Tessa.”

  He scowled at her. “I used to think you were smart. Now I just think you’re yet another meddling female in my life.”

  “Yes, but you love me.”

  “That’s up for debate right now.”

  “Shane...you sent Wendy on her way. You need to have a conversation with Tessa and you know it.”

  He rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah, I do...but...”

  “But nothing. Just be there tonight, OK?”

  “You women are going to be the death of me,” he swore.

  Ivy laughed and quickly kissed his cheek. “See you in a bit.”

  Tessa tried to push out of her mind the surprised and pleased looks on her mother and Gib’s faces when she told them she was going to attend Steve Sinclair’s cookout. She knew getting back into the swing of things socially was a big step and that they were proud and happy for her. As she pulled up into Steve’s drive, she knew they were right. This was a big step. She just hoped she wouldn’t blow it.

  She saw Ivy approach as she got out and returned her welcoming smile. She heard music and voices coming from the back of the house, as well as plenty of laughter and it warmed her heart.

  “You made it!” Ivy greeted her.

  “Said I would.”

  “Yeah, I know, but I wasn’t sure. Fair warning...Wendy is here. She and Shane have cooled things off since you’ve been back but she’s become good friends with Steve and his wife Carrie.”

  Tessa nodded. She didn’t have to ask if Shane was there; she’d seen his truck parked toward the back and side of the drive where he could get out easily should he be called to duty. She followed Ivy around the side of the house and accepted welcoming hugs from people she’d grown up with. It wasn’t easy for her and by the time the fourth guy embraced her she was extremely on edge. That was when she looked up and made eye contact with Shane from across the deck. As always, he seemed to know what she was feeling and the calm and steady look on his face helped her make it through the rest of the greetings.

  She saw Wendy approach him and by speaking, turned his attention to her. She watched him turn to face her fully, his head dropping as she spoke to him. He looked so tired, she thought. Looking at them from a distance, though, she had to admit they made an attractive couple.

  “Ivy?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Shane and Wendy...how serious were they?”

  Ivy shrugged. “More on her end than on his, but neither of them were 100% in it. She’s recently divorced.”

  “Whatever she’s saying to him, it’s not going well for him.”

  Ivy nodded. “You know Shane. Carries the weight of the world on his shoulders.”

  “Mmm, that he does,” she mused.

  “Ivy, could you give me a hand here,” Steve called.

  “Yeah, yeah, keep your shirt on!” she called back to him. “Make yourself comfortable, Tess. Drinks in the coolers, food everywhere, take your pick.”

  “Yeah, sure,” she murmured to Ivy’s retreating back. She settled into a chair at the far corner of the deck and unashamedly watched Shane and Wendy. She spoke with him for several more moments, embraced him and placed a lingering kiss on his cheek and then walked away. Shane stood for a moment, head down, shoulders hunched. He turned back toward the party, made eye contact with Tessa, and then walked down the steps of the deck toward the lake. She watched him a few more minutes as he stood staring out at the sunset. Unable to stand it any longer, she grabbed two bottles of beer from the nearest cooler and made her way down to him.

  “You look like you could use this,” she said, holding one of the bottles out to him.

  Shane glanced over his shoulder at her. For several minutes, they stood in silence, neither moving, just looking into each other’s eyes. Finally, Shane sighed and turned to face her, taking the beer from her.

  “Thanks.”

  She watched him take a long pull from th
e bottle and took a small drink from her own. An awkward silence settled between them. They had been many things with each other over the years but awkward had never been one of them. She stood for a few more moments, her gaze shifting between him and the lake, unsure of what to say. Finally, when it became apparent that he wasn’t going to speak, she nodded and decided to go.

  “Well, I just thought you could use a drink. I’ll be going now,” she said, turning to go.

  “What did you expect?” he asked, eyes still focused on some unknown point out at the lake.

  “Excuse me?”

  “Did you think all you had to do was come back to town and I’d just fall at your feet again?”

  She stared at him a moment in disbelief then shook her head. “Look, now’s obviously not a good time. I brought you a drink. We spoke. I’ll go now.”

  She made it maybe five or so feet before she heard a vicious curse and then the shatter of glass as the beer bottle she’d handed him was smashed against a nearby tree.

  “I believe that’s called littering, Sheriff, and carries a fine.”

  “Just stop, Tess.”

  “Stop what? Talking to you? No problem, I’ll just leave you to your glass clean up.”

  “Yeah, there you go again, walk away. Typical Tessa. Going gets tough and you just leave rather than face up to it.”

  She glared at him, fists clenching. “Screw you, McCanton.”

  A bitter laugh escaped him. She turned on her heel to leave but he grabbed her arm to stop her, causing her to whirl and lash out on instinct, her fist connecting with his jaw.

  “Son of a bitch!” he growled, releasing her as he stumbled back.

  “Don’t. Grab. Me like that,” she panted.

  “Dammit, Tessa! Do you think I would ever hurt you?”

  “I went through...hell in that compound. Having men’s hands all over me and not being able to do anything about it almost destroyed me. I will never be in that position again. Not ever again.”

  His eyes closed briefly and when he looked back at her, she saw a bit of his anger slip away.