Captive Pride

by Bobbi Smith

  Suddenly, in a rush of revolting realization, it all became clear to CC, and she shook her head in stunned, outraged bewilderment. As naive as she’d been, she hadn’t understood Kincade’s accusations before, but now a disgusting awareness dawned. Lord Noah Kincade had thought that she was prostituting herself in hopes of winning them over to the rebel cause….

  The knowledge that he had suspected her of such degrading behavior only served to intensify her already hostile feelings for him. He thought her no better than a common tramp! He had used her as such, and even the discovery of her untouched state had not altered his opinion.

  Her anger was so powerful that she felt physically ill, and she was pale and trembling when Anna’s soft knock came at the door. Snatching up her dressing gown, she pulled it quickly on, fearful that without it Anna might somehow know of her indiscretion. Bidding her servant to enter, she forced herself to present a calm front as the maid directed the belowstairs servants where to put the tub and then supervised as they filled it with hot water.

  “Is there anything else I can do for you, Miss CC?” Anna offered solicitously.

  “No. I think I’ll just soak a while and then go on to bed.”

  “Shall I bring you a sherry? You’re still looking rather peaked,” she noted with concern.

  The offer of a sherry did sound soothing, and CC agreed, “A small brandy might just be the thing, Anna. Thanks.”

  Quickly and efficiently, Anna directed the other servants from the room and then followed them downstairs to get the liquor for her mistress. As she poured the brandy into a crystal snifter, she pondered the situation. Something was amiss, but she wasn’t sure just what it was. Usually after a party Miss CC was lighthearted and full of gossip and interesting tidbits of all that had happened. This unusual silence by her was troubling. Anna suspected that it all had to do with her earlier unkempt state, and she wondered if something terrible had happened. Something that maybe she should talk about.

  Carrying the liquor, she returned to the room and knocked only once before admitting herself. It did not surprise Anna to find CC already soaking in the steaming tub, and she drew a small table near and placed the brandy upon it within easy reach.

  “Thank you, Anna.”

  “You’re welcome. So how was the ball, Miss CC?” Anna tried to encourage her to talk, hoping to discover the reason for her strange mood.

  “Fine,” came her answer.

  “Did your father seem to enjoy himself?” she asked as she moved quietly about the room picking up CC’s discarded clothing.

  “I think so. He was quite pleased that everyone came.”

  “Indeed, there was a crowd, and Lord Kincade was here, wasn’t he?”

  At the mention of his name, CC couldn’t prevent herself from tensing, and Anna noticed but did not comment on it.

  “Yes, he came, and so did his younger brother, Matthew.”

  “Was the brother wearing dark blue?”

  “I believe so; why?” CC cast a glance at her maid.

  “I’d caught sight of him one time and thought him quite good-looking, too. Still, there is just something about the older one that’s—”

  “I know.” CC cut her off sharply, not wanting to hear her sing Kincade’s praises. Anna knew nothing about the man; she only saw the gift wrap, so to speak. “I’m really tired tonight, Anna….”

  Anna took the hint and started for the door. “Will you be needing me for anything else?”

  “No. You go on. I’ll be fine.”

  “Good night, then, Miss CC.”

  CC was glad when Anna had gone. Sipping from the relaxing liquor, she soaked in the hot, perfumed bath for a long time after her departure, wanting to ease all the unfamiliar aches from her slender body. Only when she felt drowsily content and free of Kincade’s scent upon her did she emerge from the tub and dry herself. Clad in her most comfortable nightdress, she finally slipped beneath the covers of her bed.

  Sleep should have come easily. She was warm, content, and safe in her own bedroom, but images of Kincade kept disturbing her rest. Whenever she closed her eyes, a vision of Noah as he had been in the summerhouse would loom before her, his silver eyes burning with passion, his hands reaching out for her with sensual intent. CC tossed and turned, growing more and more distraught over the heat that surged through her whenever he entered her thoughts. She hated him and all he stood for, yet he was haunting her. The memory of his touch alone had the power to send her pulses racing.

  Getting up, she padded restlessly to the window. Parting the heavy drapes, she stared out across the quiet city as she tried to come to grips with the riotous feelings Noah Kincade stirred within her. From the very beginning, he had not fit any preconceived mold she had of English noblemen…. He was not fat and ugly; he was not effeminate. What Kincade was, CC acknowledged grudgingly, was devastatingly handsome. She recognized now that he was the consummate rake and a masterful lover. Though she knew she hated him and his mercenary ways, her body had responded to him as to no other.

  CC shivered and retreated to the warmth of her bed, protectively pulling her blankets up to her chin. She had given in to Kincade’s sensual demands in a moment of weakness, and she vowed that it would never happen again. She was going to make every effort to ensure that their paths never crossed again. Feeling slightly reassured and a little more in control, CC curled on her side and closed her eyes.

  The remembrance of Noah leaving the ball with Eve Woodham pierced CC’s drowsy thoughts then, sending a pang of heart-pain echoing dully through her, and a silent tear was tracing a lonely path across the softness of her cheek as sleep finally claimed her.

  Matt left the ball and returned to the inn a short time after Noah had departed with Eve Woodham. Since his discussion with the military men in the study earlier that evening, he’d found himself growing more and more aware of the loyalists’ attitudes and more and more annoyed with their puffed-up ways until he finally felt the need to escape their stifling presence.

  He was troubled as he settled himself at a quiet table in a corner of the taproom. The liquor he’d consumed that night had rendered him slightly philosophical and he found himself, for the first time, confronting and challenging his own aristocratic views of life. Savoring the cool tankard of ale Polly quickly served him, he almost wished that Noah would return from the merry widow’s so he could discuss things with him.

  A wry smile lifted the corners of Matt’s mouth as he thought of Noah leaving Eve Woodham’s company early. If ever there was a colonial woman guaranteed to attract Noah’s attention, it was Eve. She was gorgeous, sophisticated, and most obvious in showing just how interested she was in him. It pleased Matt to know that at least some part of Noah’s old self remained, and he knew that there was little chance of his brother returning any time soon.

  Thinking of Noah, Matt wondered why his brother had wanted to be alone with CC in the garden. He knew that it had to have been important since Noah had gone to all the trouble of inventing an excuse to send him inside, but beyond that he had no clue as to the reason. At first, after discovering Noah’s manipulation of the situation, Matt had suspected that he might have been interested in CC, but then, when he’d departed the party in Eve’s company, he’d dismissed the thought. Whatever had passed between Noah and CC, it had not had to do with courtship. It would have made absolutely no sense for Noah to attempt to woo their lovely hostess and then leave with the widow.

  Matt took a deep drink of his ale as he thought of CC. She was a beautiful woman, and he’d found her company most delightful. He had been pleased when he’d found out that she was not promised to Robinson, and he had even considered paying court to her himself until the memory of Faith’s delicate beauty had intruded. Faith had been in the back of his mind all night, and though he’d tried to put the thought of her from him, he’d been unable to dismiss her completely, even amidst the splendor of the ball.

  As he finished off his drink and signaled for the barmaid to bring
another, Matt pondered again all that had happened during the last few days. The attitudes of Winthrop and Thornhill had shaken the foundation of his respect and love for his homeland, and he now found himself questioning the very tenets of his life.

  He firmly believed that the colonists were true Englishmen, and since they were, they deserved every benefit of the laws of the land. He thought it completely outrageous that the two officers considered their men blameless. They’d claimed that the attack had not been reported, yet Matt couldn’t help but wonder if it had been reported and then arrogantly dismissed, just as they had dismissed his outrage.

  Matt was seething in frustration. He had to learn the truth.

  The sound of the door opening drew his attention, and he glanced up to find Noah striding into the room, a black scowl marring his handsome features. Matt thought it odd that there had been no sound of a carriage drawing up, and he wondered how his brother had gotten back to the inn.

  “Noah…” he called out.

  Noah noticed Matt sitting alone at a table, and he made his way across the sparsely populated room to join him.

  “You’re back early,” Matt noted with some interest as Noah sat down opposite him. “I hadn’t expected to see you until morning.”

  Noah’s gaze turned glacial at his teasing, but he didn’t respond right away as Polly approached the table to serve Matt his fresh mug of ale.

  “Can I get you anything, Lord Kincade?” Polly offered. The last night she’d spent with him had been even better than the first, surpassing even her most ardent dreams, and she was eager to be available to him whenever he wanted her.

  “No. Nothing, Polly,” he answered brusquely to deliberately discourage her. “Thank you.”

  Disappointed, but having no other recourse, Polly retreated to allow them their privacy.

  “Well?” Matt prodded, sensing there was much he wasn’t telling.

  “Well, what?” Noah ground out.

  “What happened with Eve Woodham? I didn’t hear a carriage. I—”

  “I chose to walk back,” he answered.

  “You chose to walk?” Matt quirked one dark brow in disbelief.

  Noah glared at him. He did not want to discuss any of what had happened this night; not with Matthew, not with anyone.

  “Walking is a mode of transportation,” he drawled. “Now, if you’ve finished trying to pry into my private affairs…my intention in returning was to retire for the night….”

  “All right.” Matt hid his grin by taking a drink. Noah was being as stoic as ever, and no matter how intriguing the circumstances, he knew that his closemouthed brother would not reveal a thing.

  “You returned early from the ball yourself,” Noah pointed out as he leaned back, relaxing a bit now that Matt’s inquisition was at an end.

  Matt’s previously bemused expression turned serious as he replied, “I had things I needed to think about.”

  “Such as?”

  He eyed Noah levelly before answering. “I had a slightly unsettling discussion with Winthrop and Thornhill.”

  “The military officers? Why?” His curiosity was piqued.

  “I had overheard them talking about the quality of troops stationed here, and I commented to them on the lack of discipline.”

  “Yes…”

  “I related all that had happened with Faith the other night and they were singularly unimpressed. It seems to me that they care very little about the plight of colonials. Some of their remarks were most disturbing and led me to believe that there might actually be a good reason for all the unrest.”

  Noah’s lips quirked as he asked sarcastically, “Are you saying you’re not nearly so furious with me now for my traitorous ways in betraying our country?”

  “I’m saying that if Winthrop’s and Thornhill’s attitudes are pervasive among those representing our government, then it’s no wonder that there is vast potential for a revolt.”

  “And just whose side would you be on, Matthew, if it came to that?” His question was pointed and gave the younger man pause.

  “I don’t know,” Matt answered honestly. “Before tonight, even with the attack on Faith, I still was ardently against revolt, but now…”

  “Now, nothing!” Noah was suddenly sitting stiffly in his chair. “Don’t give it another thought.”

  The sharpness of his tone drew a puzzled look from Matt. “But…”

  “You are Lord Matthew Kincade and you will not become involved in any of this.” The last was a command. “Do you understand me?”

  “I may be Lord Matthew Kincade, but I am a man, and I will make up my own mind,” Matt countered with dignity.

  “The hell you will! You insolent pup!” Noah ground out in low tones. “Don’t be a fool. This entire situation could get very bloody, very fast.”

  “If it gets bloody, then I can be assured that you had a hand in it!” he snapped.

  “My involvement is strictly business—profit and loss. What you’re talking about is your life. I won’t stand by and watch you get caught up in something that could be dangerous…possibly even deadly.”

  “It’s not your decision to make, Noah,” Matt said with slow intent. “It’s mine.”

  “Matthew…” Noah sounded ominous, but Matt faced him with equanimity.

  “I will do whatever it is I have to do…whatever I feel is right.”

  “But you’re an English lord!”

  Matt shrugged expressively. “And so are you, but you’re doing what you feel is necessary. Right?”

  Noah found himself frustrated at the willfulness his brother was displaying again, and he ordered in the tone that had always worked in the past, “We will be returning to England in the spring, Matthew.”

  His movements tense, Matt got to his feet. Staring down at his older brother, he said only, “We shall see, Noah. We shall see.”

  Leaving his half-full mug of ale on the table, he stalked from the room, disappearing up the stairs.

  Noah stared after him for a long moment before snatching up the tankard and drinking down the remaining contents. The different liquor hit him hard, but caught up in emotional turmoil as he was, he barely noticed. Tossing a coin on the tabletop for Polly, he followed in Matt’s direction, seeking what he hoped would be serenity in his own chamber.

  The rented room was cold and unwelcoming as Noah entered, and he remembered with regret the warmth and comfort of Kincade Hall. Suppressing the melancholy that threatened, he locked the door behind him and negligently began to discard his clothing. Clad only in breeches, he stretched out across the bed, resting a forearm heavily across his brow as he closed his eyes. His rest was short-lived, however, as the heavy fragrance of Eve’s perfume seemed to surround him even there in his own room. Getting up, Noah moved to the washstand to scrub away the sweet cloying essence.

  Eve…He should have known better, but for some reason, at the time he had felt driven to accept her advances. Certainly she was a beautiful woman, but it was a cold beauty that had reminded him, once they’d left the ball, of Andrea Broadmoor. From the moment they’d gotten into her private carriage, Eve had made it plain to him that she wanted him, kissing him full and flaming on the mouth and practically climbing onto his lap in her passion. Noah had never refused an offer so boldly put, but when they reached her home and were alone in the dark seclusion of the house, he suddenly felt no desire for a consummation with her. That had been an awkward enough situation for him to deal with, but what had made it even worse was that he found himself continually comparing Eve to CC.

  He gritted his teeth even now as he thought of CC. Cecelia Demorest was a paradox. She was outspoken in her dislike for English noblemen; she was completely opposed to her own father’s views on colonial relations; she’d masqueraded as a boy in her determination to help her secret cause; and she’d surrendered herself to him in hopes of maneuvering him into a more agreeable frame of mind toward her rebel group.

  The realization that she had been untouched wh
en he’d taken her struck a chord of emotion within him, and Noah frowned. How could it have been? Though she had denied during their argument that she and John Robinson were affianced, they had certainly seemed loverlike throughout the evening. Obviously, Noah realized now, he’d been wrong in that assumption, but why, if she cared so deeply for the other man, had she given her virginity to him?

  Noah shook his head as if to clear it of unwelcome thoughts of CC, but it did no good as visions of the evening clouded his mind. Eve—blond and aggressive; CC—fiery but reluctant…Eve had known what she was about; CC had been untried.

  Noah almost regretted that he had initiated her in such an abrupt manner. He forced himself to remember that CC had been the one using him and that she had not hesitated to return to her boyfriend as soon as she’d finished with him. Perhaps she was even with Robinson now…. He pictured CC making love to the other man and knew a moment of unexpected fury.

  Suddenly angry with himself for even thinking about the wench, Noah stalked to the bed and lay back down, seeking rest. The ale along with the champagne he’d imbibed all night had numbed his senses more than he’d been aware, and he soon succumbed to a blissful, dreamless sleep.

  Eve tore the artificial bird from her hair and threw it angrily across the room. Damn! Her body had been on fire with need for Kincade and he had left her! Just like that! She muttered a curse that would have done many a man proud as she stomped to her dressing table and sat down.

  Eve stared at her reflection, trying to understand what she’d done wrong, but none of it made sense. The possibility that Lord Kincade might not prefer women occurred to her, but she quickly discarded it. He had seemed most receptive to her in the beginning, and everything she had heard about him had emphasized that he was quite the playboy. She could only conclude, with some embarrassment, that she had come on too strongly for his tastes. Judging from his aloof demeanor once they’d reached the house, Eve supposed that he had to be the type of man who liked to be completely in charge of a relationship.