“I apologize for that. It’s my fault. I should have never let it get out of hand. I didn’t realize the situation.”
My head snapped up in surprise. It wasn’t his fault; it was all me. I shook my head. “No!”
“Don’t be surprised. Asking you to do such a dramatic stunt with literally no time to process the idea or prep was unacceptable, and I’m sorry.”
I’m pretty sure my jaw lay on the floor.
“I forget that you guys are so young. Making changes this close to opening night is something even professionals would freak out about.”
He stood up and paced in front of the coffee table. He pushed a hand through his hair. “With all your cheerleading background and all your stunt work, I assumed the fall would be a simple for you. I had forgotten about your serious fall in cheerleading. Now that I have all the information, it makes total sense. I just wish you would have confided in me right away.”
“But it won’t make any difference. If I don’t do the fall, it’ll ruin the show.”
He stopped in his tracks. “Don’t worry, I’ll figure something out.”
I couldn’t let him do that. I didn’t want to compromise the show. If I dug deep enough, I knew I could do it, and I wanted to make things up to Eli. I’d acted like such a bitch.
“I’ve been thinking a lot about it while I rode home with my dad. You’re right. The news of the stunt surprised me, but I’ve had time to think about it, and I’d really like to do it.”
Tyson looked at me with skepticism.
“I know it’s hard to believe that after my behavior tonight. But I know I can.” I swallowed not wanting to even begin to think about how much I had screwed things up with him. “I’ve done much harder and scarier things a million times. I know exactly how to do that…” I cleared my throat. “…fall.”
Tyson considered me. “Are you sure that’s a good idea? It’s obvious you still have a lot of fear related to your accident. I don’t want to put you in a situation that’s uncomfortable or unsafe.”
“I’m absolutely sure. If you want, we can go downtown right now, and I’ll show you.”
His mood seemed to brighten. “The place is locked up, but we can run it before show time tomorrow.”
“Sounds great.” I said with a confidence that wasn’t as strong as it sounded.
“You’re positive about this?” he asked, offering me an out.
“Absolutely.”
“Well then, I’ll get out of here and let you get some rest.”
I walked him to the door. “I’m really sorry about tonight and that I acted like a total lunatic.”
“Don’t worry about it. We all need to let off some steam once in a while. But do me a favor will ya?”
“Sure.”
“Go light on Eli. He’s under a lot of pressure too.” He smiled.
“I will.”
“Goodnight.”
I let him out, and no sooner had I locked the door than Mom and Dad came around the corner.
“Your dad filled me in on what’s happening?” Mom said with concern.
“Well? What did he have to say? Did you decide anything?” Dad asked.
I leaned against the door. “He was really nice and we talked it all out. And…I’m going to perform the stunt. I know I can do it.”
“You’re sure?” Dad asked.
“Positive.” I lied. I didn’t want to let anyone down and I wouldn’t. I just didn’t know how to get myself off that edge.
“I’m glad it all worked out,” Mom said. “Your director seemed like a very nice man, and, oh! You did not do that man justice!”
“I told you!”
“Ralph, do you mind if I put Tyson Scott at the top of my list?”
“Eww, Mom.”
“What? I can have anyone I want on my list.” She raised her eyes suggestively at my dad.
I shook my head. “I’m going to bed.” The exhaustion from all the drama had caught up with me.
“Hey Willow?” Dad asked as I climbed the steps. “You sure you’re okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
And I kept telling myself that through a fitful night of sleep and all through school on Thursday.
Chapter 36
Dress rehearsal sucked. The whole day sucked. The whole day my adrenaline was revved up high. I couldn’t stop fidgeting, and any time someone spoke to me, I jumped.
The closer it came to my call time, the worse it got. Mom forced me to eat a little dinner, but after a few bites my stomach started to roll.
Eli didn’t call, and I didn’t try to call him either. There was just too much to say and not enough time to figure anything out.
After I drove around the parking ramp ten times, not ready to face the music, I walked into the theatre twenty minutes late. I wanted to throw up. Instead, I swallowed my sense of doom.
I could do this. I would not run. I would not quit.
The makeup room streamed with activity. The company applied most of their makeup on their own and then the make up director Mary Gorman, or one of her assistants finished them off with dramatic eyes, including false eye lashes for the girls and contouring shades on the guys.
Mary applied my make up. I wasn’t even allowed to touch a brush. “Are you ready for tonight?” she asked, unaware of the drama churning inside me.
“As ready as I’ll ever be.” I tried to block out all thoughts of that stupid fall. I knew I had to do it, but each time I tried to picture myself falling off that set piece, I shuddered in revulsion as an image of me splatting to my death took over.
“Five minutes to full cast run of the Party Scene,” Jerry’s voice boomed over the backstage sound system. “Ten minute call for Jason, Eli and Willow to run the final scene.”
“Shit.” My adrenaline pumped up another notch as I made me way to the stage with the others who laughed and joked with nervous excitement. Everyone was present; orchestra, lights, sound. No breaking character or stopping for anything.
“Places everyone,” Tyson called. He looked even more ragged than last night.
We all shuffled to our starting spots. Eli and I began at opposite sides of the stage. I caught his eye, and he looked back with a stubborn set to his chin, but a softness in his eyes. He nodded, but didn’t smile or give me any sign of forgiveness or reconciliation. I nodded back and hoped things would improve.
“Heads in the game people!” Tyson called out. “Let’s get this down the first time. We don’t have time to rerun it.”
The Party Scene has been one of our biggest challenges. It’s a big band scene. It’s crowded and busy, with a lot happening. The conductor signaled the orchestra and the intro began. I tried to concentrate on the steps and not my next task: falling through the trap.
“Much better,” Tyson said when we finished. “Clear the stage for a set change, and then I need Willow, Eli, and Jason.”
Here we go. I snuck a look at Eli. He looked at me, but said nothing. I’m sure he was biting his tongue to see if I’d do the fall or not. He could wait all day, cause I was about to deliver the goods.
My body shuddered.
“Somebody help!” Sophie yelled.
A commotion started behind me.
“Give her room.” Alex sounded really serious.
“Tyson, you better get up here, something is wrong with Sophie.”
A small crowed blocked my view. I edged by and there on the floor, center stage, lay Sophie having a grand mal seizure.
Chapter 37
I had to look away, but could still hear the sound of Sophie’s body as it seized against the hardwood stage floor. The sound transported me back to Twinkie's suffering only a couple weeks before.
Eli’s eye caught mine. He let down his anger for just a second. We knew better than most the horror that was attacking poor Sophie. Please, oh please, God, don’t let her have a brain tumor.
Tyson appeared in an instant and pushed through the cluster of onlookers. He took one look and yelled,
“Jerry, call 911!”
McKenna started to cry. I wanted to join her.
“And call Sophie’s parents too!” Tyson pulled off his sweatshirt, knelt down beside her and slid it under her head. “Give her some space. In fact, why don’t you all finish getting ready back in your dressing rooms.”
“Are we still going to do the show?” McKenna asked.
“Yes, the show is on. Unless terrorists attack the State Capitol, the curtain rises at eight p.m. sharp.”
Eli and I shared a charged look as we went our separate ways. The sound of sirens could be heard as I entered my dressing room. It reminded me how fragile life can be.
* * *
But I couldn't stay away. I had to know she would be okay, so I watched from the darkened wings as a team of paramedics surrounded her. They spread out their medical equipment on the stage and tended to her. A gurney waited nearby. My heart clenched as I peeked glimpses of Sophie looking so vulnerable. I prayed she didn't have a brain tumor. The only positive aspect of the scary scene was that it prevented me from practicing the fall. After what felt like an eternity, the ambulance whisked Sophie away.
Tyson spoke to us backstage minutes before curtain. “The excitement is over. Sophie is in good hands, and we’ll get an update from her parents as soon as possible. Now I want you all to clear your heads and focus on the show. We have a full house out there thanks to Capital High School.
He pulled me aside. “Willow, we’re not going to have a chance to practice the fall.” His brows lowered over his intense eyes. “Tell me now if you are up for it or not.”
There was an out?
“How do we end the show if she won’t take the fall?” Eli barely masked the angry frustration in his voice.
“I don’t know. We’ll turn it into a stabbing or gunshot or something.” Tyson said.
“But we don’t have time to choreograph something new. Plus that’ll be lame. How will I die then? It needs a dramatic tragic ending.”
“Eli, stop worrying about it. You need to concentrate on leading this show. Get your head in the game.” Tyson patted Eli’s shoulder then returned his attention to me.
I did not want to ruin the show. I agreed with Eli that we needed a dramatic surprise ending. I knew how to take that fall. It wasn’t difficult. Physically. I just needed to get my head to cooperate, but thoughts of Sophie’s seizure and the sound of ambulance sirens brought back my greatest fears.
My body was rigid with determination. “I’m good. I can do it,” I said.
Eli raised an eyebrow of doubt.
“I got it!” I huffed.
“You’re sure?” Tyson asked.
“I’m positive,” I repeated, truly believing my words.
“Great.” He smiled in relief. “Let’s get this show up.” He queued the stage manager.
“Places!” Jerry called.
And the show began; fifteen minutes late.
* * *
Unfortunately, after the scare with Sophie, the disasters kept coming.
Eli’s mic kept going out during the first scene. Damian’s shoe flew across the stage in a big dance number, and Jason forgot his lines. Twice.
And then, during the love scene my spacing was off and I elbowed Eli in the jaw so hard he fell back and tripped me as he tried to catch his balance. I hit the floor in the most ungraceful fashion. All in all. It sucked.
I didn’t hear myself sing. It was all remote control and probably not very good. I kept thinking about Jilly and the cheer squad watching and judging my every move. I’m sure they wanted me to fail, since they didn’t make nationals. I didn’t blame them.
The disastrous excuse for a show was winding down, and the final scene loomed. All night I’d forced it out of my mind as best I could, but as Samantha helped me change into my next costume, I knew there was no more hiding.
“You ready?” she asked as she pulled the dress from the last scene over my head.
“Sure,” I answered, kicking off my shoes and pretending the next scene didn’t terrify me. I couldn’t let anyone know how hard this was.
“Need a pep talk or a shot of whiskey?” She grinned and I could see why Tyson adored her so much.
“Tyson would love that!” I laughed and held my arms up as she pulled the new costume on.
“If there is anything I can do to help you through this, you let me know.” She spoke direct at me as she adjusted the dress. “I’ve faced my own share of ‘issues’ over the years, and I don’t want you to feel alone in figuring this out.”
“Thanks. I think the best plan is to avoid thinking about it until the last second and just do it.” I lifted a foot and she slid on a shoe and buckled it.
“Alright.” She nodded, but said nothing more. I wished she would’ve said, Great plan! You’ll be great! Don’t worry.
But I was worried. Very worried. I kept trying to block it out of my mind. I wanted to cover my ears and say “la la la la la la la,” like I do when Mom lectures me about the dangers of processed foods.
“You’re all set. Go knock ‘em dead.”
As I left the dressing room, my heart pounded heavy exploding beats.
Shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh shit.
No, I could do this. I would do this. I have to do this.
With only a few seconds before our scene, Jason approached, his forehead creased. “You okay? You going to be able to take the fall?”
“I’m fine,” I snapped and immediately regretted it. He flinched, but said nothing. Jason had always been nice to me. I wanted to apologize, but was too wrapped up in “Willow’s World” to think about anything but my own problems.
The lights came up, and Jerry cued our entrance.
No looking back now.
The scene was a blur.
I went through the motions, but inside my mind battled my gut. Suddenly Eli, Jason and I were on the rooftop with the fight about to hit its climax.
The bright lights glared. The sound of the orchestra was drowned out by the eerie pounding of blood through my panicked brain.
I saw shadowy images of the audience through my haze.
The music built.
I saw the edge.
I saw the open trap in the stage floor below.
My pulse raced.
Jason rushed at me. Eli watched, his character reacting in horror.
This is when I teeter on the edge and then fall to my death.
I moved to the edge.
It was too far. Too dangerous. I stepped away from the edge.
Panicked, I turned to Jason and then Eli, whose eyes were wide in a different kind of panic.
“Go!” He seethed between clenched teeth.
I gave the slightest shake of my head.
No.
The music vamped on, the director probably flipping out because we passed the crescendo of where I’m supposed to fall.
I looked back and forth from Jason and Eli again, each of them not knowing what to do.
So I collapsed.
On the rooftop set. I fell close to the back wall where I couldn’t fall off and get hurt.
Not off the side through the trap to the mat.
I just collapsed in place up on the rooftop right in front of them. What the hell else could I do? I knew I had to die. So I lay there like a dead fish collecting flies.
Confused, Jason stared like I’d lost my mind.
“Stab her,” Eli whispered to Jason.
“What?” he looked at him in disbelief.
“Pretend to stab her!”
Jason came at me. He raised his arm high and with an invisible knife and stabbed me in the heart.
Eli came up behind Jason. Jason turned and fake stabbed him too.
Eli fell on the rooftop floor next to me. Jason eyed us both and then ran off stage. The music hit its high note, finished the dramatic last couple notes, and the stage went black.
“Oh my fucking lord! What the hell was that!” Eli seethed in the dark.
“I’m s
orry,” I said filled with so much regret.
“Sorry? You made a fool out of Jason and me, not to mention you ruined what was supposed to be the climax of the show!”
We got up in the dark to move off stage for the mega mix, which is supposed to happy and joyous.
“I know. I didn’t mean to. I really didn’t,” I cried.
“Tyson asked if you could do this, and you said yes. You could have been honest. You could have ’fessed up and given him a chance to figure something else out.” He took the steps at the back of the set.
“I said I’m sorry. What more do you want?” Tears streaked my face as I followed, stepping on the glow-in-the-dark tape as I went.
Eli stopped and faced me. “Be honest with people for once in your life and stop running or cowering from everything that scares you.”
I couldn’t agree more. I didn’t know what to say, so I said nothing. He huffed and stormed off to change for the Mega Mix.
Back in my dressing room, I fought the tears, put myself on automatic and went through the motions like a robot. Samantha gave me a hug and a little smile that was supposed to make me feel better, but instead told me what a failure I was.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to ruin the show.” I choked back a sob.
“Shh.” She gave me a big hug. “What’s done is done.” She proceeded to help me into my angelic white finale costume. I gulped air, trying to calm myself down.
“I’ve ruined it for everyone. Tyson’s going to hate me.”
“All set,” she said a minute later. “Tyson won’t hate you. He’s a much better man than that. Now chin up. Go finish the show.”
“Right.”
I pasted on a fake smile and left. I didn’t look at Eli or anyone else for that matter. My bow was a pathetic half-hearted leap that barely got off the ground.
The student filled audience applauded. I didn't know why, as we, no I, sucked! The curtain came down, and the cast reacted with a mix of relief it was over and frustration at all the screw-ups.
I approached Eli to test the waters of his mood. I noticed his swollen cheekbone from where I had smacked him during a number. He backed away
Dream Chaser Page 22
