The Rain Sparrow

by Debbie Macomber

  “You’re making a joke out of everything,” she told him, angry that her voice was shaking. “And I don’t like that. If you want to play games, do it with someone other than me.”

  “Ellen, listen—”

  The phone rang and she jerked her attention to the hallway.

  “I didn’t mean—” Reed paused and raked his fingers through his hair. The phone pealed a second time. “Go ahead and answer that.”

  She hurried away, relieved to interrupt this disturbing conversation. “Hello.” Her voice sounded breathless, as though she’d raced down the stairs.

  “Ellen? This is Charlie. I got a message that you phoned.”

  For one crazy instant, Ellen forgot why she’d wanted to talk to Charlie. “I phoned? Oh, right. Remember that algebra paper I was struggling with? Well, I got it back today.”

  “How’d you do?”

  A little of the surprised pleasure returned. “I still can’t believe it. I got a B-minus. My simple paper about the wonders of the number nine received one of the highest marks in the class. I’m still in shock.”

  Charlie’s delighted chuckle came over the wire. “This calls for a celebration. How about if we go out tomorrow night? Dinner, drinks, the works.”

  Ellen almost regretted the impulse to contact Charlie. She sincerely liked him, and she hated the thought of stringing him along or taking advantage of his attraction to her. “Nothing so elaborate. Chinese food and a movie would be great.”

  “You let me worry about that. Just be ready by seven.”

  “Charlie.”

  “No arguing. I’ll see you at seven.”

  By the time Ellen got off the phone, Reed was nowhere to be seen. Nor was he around the following afternoon. The boys didn’t comment and she couldn’t very well ask about him without arousing their suspicions. As it was, the less she mentioned Reed around them, the better. The boys had obviously read more into the letter, phone call and dinner than Reed had intended. But she couldn’t blame them; she’d read enough into it herself to be frightened by what was happening between them. He’d almost kissed her when he’d parked in front of the house. And she’d wanted him to—that was what disturbed her most. But if she allowed her emotions to get involved, she knew that someone would probably end up being hurt. And the most likely someone was Ellen herself.

  Besides, if Reed was attracted to Danielle’s sleek elegance, then he would hardly be interested in her own more homespun qualities.

  A few minutes before seven, Ellen was ready for her evening with Charlie. She stood before the downstairs hallway mirror to put the finishing touches on her appearance, fastening her gold earrings and straightening the single chain necklace.

  “Where’s Reed been today?” Pat inquired of no one in particular.

  “His sports car is gone,” Monte said, munching on a chocolate bar. “I noticed it wasn’t in the garage when I took out the garbage.”

  Slowly Ellen sauntered into the living room. She didn’t want to appear too curious, but at the same time, she was definitely interested in the conversation.

  She had flopped into a chair and picked up a two-month-old magazine before she noticed all three boys staring at her.

  “What are you looking at me for?”

  “We thought you might know something.”

  “About what?” she asked, playing dumb.

  “Reed,” all three said simultaneously.

  “Why should I know anything?” Her gaze flittered from them to the magazine and back again.

  “You went out with him last night.”

  “We didn’t go out the way you’re implying.”

  Pat pointed an accusing finger at her. “The two of you were alone together, and both of you have been acting weird ever since.”

  “And I say the three of you have overactive imaginations.”

  “All I know is that Reed was like a wounded bear this morning,” Derek volunteered.

  “Everyone’s entitled to an off day.” Hoping to give a casual impression, she leafed through the magazine, idly fanning the pages with her thumb.

  “That might explain Reed. But what about you?”

  “Me?”

  “For the first time since you moved in, you weren’t downstairs until after ten.”

  “I slept in. Is that a crime?”

  “It just might be. You and Reed are both acting really strange. It’s like the two of you are avoiding each other and we want to know why.”

  “It’s your imagination. Believe me, if there was anything to tell you, I would.”

  “Sure, you would,” Derek mocked.

  From the corner of her eye, Ellen saw Charlie’s car pull up in front of the house. Releasing a sigh of relief, she quickly stood and gave the boys a falsely bright smile. “If you’ll excuse me, my date has arrived.”

  “Should we tell Reed you’re out with Charlie if he wants to know where you are?” Monte looked uncomfortable asking the question.

  “Of course. Besides, he probably already knows. He’s free to see anyone he wants and so am I. For that matter, so are you.” She whirled around and made her way to the front door, pulling it open before Charlie even got a chance to ring the doorbell.

  The evening didn’t go well. Charlie took her out for a steak dinner and spent more money than Ellen knew he could afford. She regretted having phoned him. Charlie had obviously interpreted her call as a sign that she was interested in becoming romantically involved. She wasn’t, and didn’t know how to make it clear without offending him.

  “Did you have a good time?” he asked as they drove back toward Capitol Hill.

  “Lovely, thank you, Charlie.”

  His hand reached for hers and squeezed it reassuringly. “We don’t go out enough.”

  “Neither of us can afford it too often.”

  “We don’t need to go to a fancy restaurant to be together,” he said lightly. “Just being with you is a joy.”

  “Thank you.” If only Charlie weren’t so nice. She hated the idea of hurting him. But she couldn’t allow him to go on hoping that she would ever return his feelings. As much as she dreaded it, she knew she had to disillusion him. Anything else would be cruel and dishonest.

  “I don’t think I’ve made a secret of how I feel about you, Ellen. You’re wonderful.”

  “Come on, Charlie, I’m not that different from a thousand other girls on campus.” She tried to swallow the tightness in her throat. “In fact, I saw the way that girl in our sociology class—what’s her name—Lisa, has been looking at you lately.”

  “I hadn’t noticed.”

  “I believe you’ve got yourself an admirer.”

  “But I’m only interested in you.”

  “Charlie, listen. I think you’re a very special person. I—”

  “Shh,” he demanded softly as he parked in front of Ellen’s house and turned off the engine. He slid his arm along the back of the seat and caressed her shoulder. “I don’t want you to say anything.”

  “But I feel I may have—”

  “Ellen,” he whispered seductively. “Be quiet and just let me kiss you.”

  Before she could utter another word, Charlie claimed her mouth in a short but surprisingly ardent kiss. Charlie had kissed her on several occasions, but that was as far as things had ever gone.

  When his arms tightened around her, Ellen resisted.

  “Invite me in for coffee,” he whispered urgently in her ear.

  She pressed her forehead against his shirt collar. “Not tonight.”

  He tensed. “Can I see you again soon?”

  “I don’t know. We see each other every day. Why don’t we just meet after class for coffee one day next week?”

  “But I want more than that,” he protested.
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br />   “I know,” she answered, dropping her eyes. She felt confused and miserable.

  Ellen could tell he was disappointed from the way he climbed out of the car and trudged around to her side. There was tense silence between them as he walked her up to the front door and kissed her a second time. Again, Ellen had to break away from him by pushing her hands against his chest.

  “Thank you for everything,” she whispered.

  “Right. Thanks, but no thanks.”

  “Oh, Charlie, don’t start that. Not now.”

  Eyes downcast, he wearily rubbed a hand along the side of his face. “I guess I’ll see you Monday,” he said with a sigh.

  “Thanks for the lovely evening.” She didn’t let herself inside until Charlie had climbed into his car and driven away.

  Releasing a jagged breath, Ellen had just started to unbutton her coat when she glanced up to find Reed standing in the living room, glowering at her.

  “Is something wrong?” The undisguised anger that twisted his mouth and hardened his gaze was a shock.

  “Do you always linger outside with your boyfriends?”

  “We didn’t linger.”

  “Right.” He dragged one hand roughly through his hair and marched a few paces toward her, only to do an abrupt about-face. “I saw the two of you necking.”

  “Necking?” Ellen was so startled by his unreasonable anger that she didn’t know whether to laugh or argue. “Be serious, will you? Two chaste kisses hardly constitute necking.”

  “What kind of influence are you on Derek and the others?” He couldn’t seem to stand still and paced back and forth in agitation.

  He was obviously furious, but Ellen didn’t understand why. He couldn’t possibly believe these absurd insinuations. Perhaps he was upset about something else and merely taking it out on her. “Reed, what’s wrong?” she finally asked.

  “I saw you out there.”

  “You were spying on me?”

  “I wasn’t spying,” he snapped.

  “Charlie and I were in his car. You must’ve been staring out the window to have seen us.”

  He didn’t answer her, but instead hurled another accusation in her direction. “You’re corrupting the boys.”

  “I’m what?” She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “What year do you think this is?” She shook her head, bewildered. “They’re nineteen. Trust me, they’ve kissed girls before.”

  “You can kiss anyone you like. Just don’t do it in front of the boys.”

  From the way this conversation was going, Ellen could see that Reed was in no mood to listen to reason. “I think we should discuss this some other time,” she said quietly.

  “We’ll talk about it right now.”

  Ignoring his domineering tone as much as possible, Ellen forced a smile. “Good night, Reed. I’ll see you in the morning.”

  She was halfway to the stairs when he called her, his voice calm. “Ellen.”

  She turned around, holding herself tense, watching him stride quickly across the short distance that separated them. With his thumb and forefinger, he caught her chin, tilting it slightly so he could study her face. He rubbed his thumb across her lips. “Funny, you don’t look kissed.”

  In one breath he was accusing her of necking and in the next, claiming she was unkissed. Not knowing how to respond, Ellen didn’t. She merely gazed at him, her eyes wide and questioning.

  “If you’re going to engage in that sort of activity, the least you can do—” He paused. With each word his mouth drew closer and closer to hers until his lips hovered over her own and their breath mingled. “The least you can do is look kissed.” His hand located the vein pounding wildly in her throat as his mouth settled over hers.

  Slowly, patiently, his mouth moved over hers with an exquisite tenderness that left her quivering with anticipation and delight. Timidly, her hands crept across his chest to link behind his neck. Again his lips descended on hers, more hungrily now, as he groaned and pulled her even closer.

  Ellen felt her face grow hot as she surrendered to the sensations that stole through her. Yet all the while, her mind was telling her she had no right to feel this contentment, this warmth. Reed belonged to another woman. Not to her...to someone else.

  Color seeped into her face. When she’d understood that he intended to kiss her, her first thought had been to resist. But once she’d felt his mouth on hers, all her resolve had drained away. Embarrassed now, she realized she’d pliantly wrapped her arms around his neck. And worse, she’d responded with enough enthusiasm for him to know exactly what she was feeling.

  He pressed his mouth to her forehead as though he couldn’t bear to release her.

  Ellen struggled to breathe normally. She let her arms slip from his neck to his chest and through the palm of her hand she could feel the rapid beating of his heart. She closed her eyes, knowing that her own pulse was pounding no less wildly.

  She could feel his mouth move against her temple. “I’ve been wanting to do that for days.” The grudging admission came in a voice that was low and taut.

  The words to tell him that she’d wanted it just as much were quickly silenced by the sound of someone walking into the room.

  Guiltily Reed and Ellen jerked apart. Her face turned a deep shade of red as Derek stopped in his tracks, staring at them.

  “Hi.”

  “Hi,” Reed and Ellen said together.

  “Hey, I’m not interrupting anything, am I? If you like, I could turn around and pretend I didn’t see a thing.”

  “Do it,” Reed ordered.

  “No,” Ellen said in the same moment.

  Derek’s eyes sparkled with boyish delight. “You know,” he said, “I had a feeling about the two of you.” While he spoke, he was taking small steps backward until he stood pressed against the polished kitchen door. He gave his brother a thumbs-up as he nudged open the door with one foot and hurriedly backed out of the room.

  “Now look what you’ve done,” Ellen wailed.

  “Me? As I recall you were just as eager for this as I was.”

  “It was a mistake,” she blurted out. A ridiculous, illogical mistake. He’d accused her of being a bad influence on the boys and then proceeded to kiss her senseless.

  “You’re telling me.” A distinct coolness entered his eyes. “It’s probably a good thing I’m leaving.”

  There was no hiding her stricken look. “Again? So soon?”

  “After what’s just happened, I’d say it wasn’t soon enough.”

  “But...where to this time?”

  “Denver. I’ll be back before Thanksgiving.”

  Mentally, Ellen calculated that he’d be away another two weeks.

  When he spoke again, his voice was gentle. “It’s just as well, don’t you think?”

  CHAPTER SIX

  “LOOKS LIKE RAIN.” Pat stood in front of the window above the kitchen sink and frowned at the thick black clouds that darkened the late-afternoon sky. “Why does it have to rain?”

  Ellen glanced up at him. “Are you seeking a scientific response or will a simple ‘I don’t know’ suffice?”

  The kitchen door swung open and Derek sauntered in. “Has anyone seen Reed?”

  Instantly, Ellen’s gaze dropped to her textbook. Reed had returned to Seattle two days earlier and so far, they’d done an admirable job of avoiding each other. Both mornings, he’d left for his office before she was up. Each evening, he’d come home, showered, changed and then gone off again. It didn’t require much detective work to figure out that he was with Danielle. Ellen had attempted—unsuccessfully—not to think of Reed at all. And especially not of him and Danielle together.

  She secretly wished she’d had the nerve to arrange an opportunity to talk to Reed. So much remained unclear
in her mind. Reed had kissed her and it had been wonderful, yet that was something neither seemed willing to admit. It was as if they’d tacitly agreed that the kiss had been a terrible mistake and should be forgotten. The problem was, Ellen couldn’t forget it.

  “Reed hasn’t been around the house much,” Pat answered.

  “I know.” Derek sounded slightly disgruntled and cast an accusing look in Ellen’s direction. “It’s almost like he doesn’t live here anymore.”

  “He doesn’t. Not really.” Pat stepped away from the window and gently set his basketball on a chair. “It’s sort of like he’s a guest who stops in now and then.”

  Ellen preferred not to be drawn into this conversation. She hastily closed her book and stood up to leave.

  “Hey, Ellen.” Pat stopped her.

  She sighed and met his questioning gaze with a nervous smile. “Yes?”

  “I’ll be leaving in a few minutes. Have a nice Thanksgiving.”

  Relieved that the subject of Reed had been dropped, she threw him a brilliant smile. “You, too.”

  “Where are you having dinner tomorrow?” Derek asked, as if the thought had unexpectedly occurred to him.

  Her mother was still in Arizona, her sister had gone to visit her in-laws and Bud couldn’t get leave, so Ellen had decided to stay in Seattle. “Here.”

  “In this house?” Derek’s eyes widened with concern. “But why? Shouldn’t you be with your family?”

  “My family is going in different directions this year. It’s no problem. In fact, I’m looking forward to having the whole house to myself.”

  “There’s no reason to spend the day alone,” Derek argued. “My parents wouldn’t mind putting out an extra plate. There’s always plenty of food.”

  Her heart was touched by the sincerity of his invitation. “Thank you, but honestly, I prefer it this way.”

  “It’s because of Reed, isn’t it?” Both boys studied her with inquisitive eyes.

  “Nonsense.”