Under Pressure

by Lori Foster

  CHAPTER TWO

  TONYA COULD HEAR male laughter coming from down the hall, and it filled her heart with hope. In such a short time Jesse had performed miracles. With the house. With Kevin.

  With her heart.

  There was still a long way to go, at least with Kevin. But her nephew had opened up enough to show occasional enthusiasm over the changes in his room, the addition of a cat and working with “the guys.” He thought Brick, Jesse’s best friend and Merrily’s fiancé, was hilarious. He and Evan, Brick’s brother, discussed school, making that transition easier. And in his quiet, resigned way, Kevin so obviously idolized Jesse.

  And why not? The man excelled at everything he did, including getting close. To Kevin, and to her.

  She’d worked so hard at resisting him, denying everything he made her feel. Then he’d shown his caring for a hurt boy, diving into a situation most men would avoid, and in the process he’d forever stolen her heart.

  She already knew she loved him.

  He’d been clear about wanting her sexually, and even clearer that he’d be sticking around to help with Kevin’s transition.

  But more than that? She didn’t know. For right now she planned to live by the motto “one day at a time.” It’d have to work with Kevin.

  And with Jesse.

  From the glimpses they’d given her so far, the loft bed looked like it came with the house, matching the woodwork, sturdy enough for a boy Kevin’s size, and all around...perfect. She had no doubt the dresser and desk would be the same once they were finished.

  Jesse was good with his hands. Good with boys. Good with women...

  He was especially good at making her adore him. For so many reasons—too many to count. Some were physical because, come on, he was a seriously gorgeous guy. Tall, fit, with dark blond hair and wicked green eyes that drew every woman’s attention.

  But the emotional reasons far outweighed the physical.

  Merrily nudged her. “You’re smiling like a woman with a fantasy on her mind.”

  “Maybe.” Tonya sighed. “Jesse’s been over almost every night for the last six days. How could I not fantasize?” She had a feeling he could have wrapped up the work in half that time, but dragged it out to give himself a reason to keep hanging around.

  Then again, other than Saturday and Sunday, he’d been putting in full days at his carpentry shop and just coming by afterward.

  “That’s awesome,” Merrily enthused. “You know Brick and I would love if you two became more official.”

  To ensure the guys wouldn’t overhear, both women kept their voices low. “That’s not the kind of fantasy I meant.”

  “I know the kind you meant, you hussy.” Merrily’s grin widened. “And I know Jesse is more than willing.”

  “That may be.” Tonya put the last slice of pizza in a keeper. “But right now it’d be tough to work out.”

  “Hmm...”

  “No,” Tonya told her, her expression filled with mock severity. “Don’t start plotting.”

  Merrily opened her mouth to reply, and just then, empty plate in hand, Kevin stepped into the kitchen. He froze when he saw they’d already put everything away. At the most unexpected times he would become wary, even about simple things like leftover pizza.

  Tonya did her best to overlook his concern. “Still hungry? We’ve got one big slice left.”

  “No.” He headed for the sink. “That’s okay.”

  “Oh please,” Merrily said, already reopening the plastic keeper. “Fill up! Better for you to eat it than chance it going to waste, right?”

  “You might want it later.” He glanced at Tonya. “Or Jesse might.”

  “Jesse can buy another pizza if he decides he wants more.”

  Unconvinced, Kevin hesitated, rocking back to his heels, until the words just bubbled out. “Mom always said I ate too much. That I’d put her in the poorhouse.”

  Appalled, Tonya went mute.

  Thank God Merrily was there because she laughed as if it were a joke, as if Tonya’s sister hadn’t been a self-centered person and a miserable mother. “I think all moms of growing boys say the same thing. Shoot, my mother used to say it about me.” She plopped the pizza on his plate. “She used to call me a bottomless pit.”

  “Really?”

  Making it the most natural thing in the world, Merrily reached up to mess his hair. “Yup. She said I inhaled my food.”

  “My mom said that too.”

  “That just means you’re growing and need the energy, I think. Good thing we had some left over, huh?”

  “Yeah.” He smiled, amazing Tonya. In the next second he said, “Thanks,” and went back to the men.

  Defeated, Tonya dropped into a seat and, elbows on the table, covered her face. “Everyone is so good with him—except for me. I totally suck.”

  “That’s not true.”

  “I overreact to everything.”

  “You knew his mother better than the rest of us, so you have a very different perspective,” Merrily reasoned. “But honestly, you need to stop looking for ways she failed him.”

  Shamed, Tonya peeked from between her spread fingers. “Do I do that?”

  “I think you’re worried, and you saw some terrible stuff, so you automatically put the worst possible connotation on everything.” She folded up the pizza box and put it in the trash, then rinsed out the food keeper they hadn’t needed, after all. “It’s understandable, so cut yourself some slack, okay? You’ve lost a sister and gained a live-in family member, so you have a lot more to deal with.”

  “I want him happy, damn it.” Brimming with frustration, she waited until Merrily had taken a seat. “More than anything in the whole world, I want that.”

  Merrily took her hand. “You both need a little time, that’s all.”

  Jesse spoke from the doorway. “And I’ll be helping.” With a naturalness of long-standing, he bent to give Tonya a reassuring hug and a kiss to her temple. “Don’t forget that.”

  Merrily beamed at him. “How’s it going in there? When can we see?”

  “Soon.” He opened the dishwasher and put his and Brick’s pizza plates away. “Kevin ate almost as much as me. I’ll have to remember that next time and order more.”

  Meaning he planned to visit for dinner again, even though the remodel was nearly complete?

  Leaning back on the counter, arms crossed, he eyed Tonya. “He said he’s never had Chinese, or Thai food. Might give that a try. And do you know he’s never grilled out?”

  No, she didn’t know that, but she wasn’t surprised. Her sister would never win mother of the year, but their apartment had been small and without a balcony, so grilling anything would have been impossible.

  Many times, Tonya knew, Cissy forgot to feed herself, so had she also forgotten to feed her son?

  She rubbed her temples. “So many things to do...”

  “But neither of you are alone.” Jesse glanced at Merrily. “You, Brick and the pets want to join us for a grill-out tomorrow? I thought maybe I’d set up the sprinkler, buy some squirt guns, maybe even bubbles.”

  “Heck yeah.” Enthused, Merrily nodded. “Count me in. The dogs will love it! They have their own kiddie pool I’ll fill up.”

  “Hot dogs and burgers, or steaks and chicken?”

  Knowing she had to get involved, Tonya said, “Why don’t we ask Kevin for his preference?”

  “Good luck with that.” Jesse eyed her a moment more, then came forward and pulled her from her chair. “Want to hit up the drive-in tonight?”

  Her jaw loosened. “The drive-in?”

  “Yeah.” He nuzzled her throat, uncaring that Merrily watched with fascination. “Some youth-appropriate movies are playing. And maybe I’ll be able to sneak in a kiss or two.”
<
br />   How could any man be so incredible? Her throat thickened and her heart swelled. “That would be pretty cool.”

  “Yeah?” His smile went crooked. “The drive-in or the kissing?”

  “Both.”

  “Well then...” This time when he touched his mouth to hers, he lingered for a few heartbeats before releasing her to turn to Merrily.

  Her friend quickly stopped fanning her face and gave Jesse an angelic look.

  “Brick said you two would join us.”

  “And here I was, getting all jealous.”

  “Is that what you were doing?”

  “Sure.” The teasing smile also added a twinkle to her eyes. “It’s been forever since I went to the drive-in.”

  Curious, Tonya asked, “What did Kevin say about it?”

  Jesse cupped her face, brushed his thumb over her cheek. “Haven’t told him yet. But I will now that you’ve agreed.” He kissed her one last time, more thoroughly, deeper, and ended with a soft growl. “I better get back to it before I forget myself.”

  As he started out of the room, Merrily mouthed, Oh my God!

  Nodding, hand to her heart, Tonya agreed. Wow, she felt singed. “He’s...”

  “Potent?” Merrily dropped back in her seat. “Yes, he is.”

  This time it was Brick who intruded. Black hair disheveled, brown eyes narrowed, he paused behind Merrily’s chair. “Talking about me again?”

  Merrily bent her head back and looked at him upside down. “Of course.”

  “Fibber.” Grinning, he leaned down for his own brand of kissing, and left Merrily breathless.

  Tonya blushed while watching. Blushed, and smiled. She was so happy for both of them.

  To break up the blatant PDA, Tonya cleared her throat. “I thought the drive-in had shut down.”

  “It closed for a while during renovations, but it’s been back open all summer.” Brushing Merrily’s long brown hair aside, Brick caressed her shoulders in a pretend-massage. “Jesse is talking about it with Kevin right now.”

  More like Jesse was working at convincing Kevin, and Kevin was quietly listening. It was rare for him to really engage in a conversation.

  Sad, Tonya thought, how they all braced for a variety of reactions beyond the expected happiness. Sometimes Kevin just took it in stride. But other times he got defensive, as if he thought he shouldn’t be happy.

  As if he thought no one really wanted him.

  In the blink of an eye he would withdraw, become distant and uncertain all over again.

  It divided her so badly—the love and, yes, the hate she felt for her deceased sister. Sometimes it knotted her stomach up so badly she didn’t know how she could bear it. Cissy had been older by eight years, but for as long as Tonya could remember, she’d been the more mature one, the one with a plan, the one who accepted responsibility.

  No matter how she’d tried to help her sister, it had never been enough. And because of that, because she’d failed, Kevin had been cheated.

  Driven by self-loathing, she pushed back her chair and strode toward the hall—but Jesse and Kevin cut her off as they left the bedroom.

  “Ah, no you don’t.” Jesse had a very paternal hand on Kevin’s shoulder, and Kevin looked...pleased. “No peeking.”

  Tension drained from her spine, and as she watched them approach, her smile came naturally. “Is the room done? I’m dying to see it.”

  “Not yet,” Jesse told her. “Brick and Merrily are going to take Kevin to the store with them to pick out some hardware for the dresser and the desk drawer.”

  That was news to her!

  “Our treat,” Merrily said from behind her, apparently having just been clued in. “Sort of a housewarming gift for Kevin, neighbor to neighbor.”

  The way Jesse watched her, Tonya knew he’d arranged it so that they’d have a little alone time, but for what? It wouldn’t take long to pick out knobs. Unless Jesse was a wham-bam kind of guy there wouldn’t be time enough for—

  “Mind out of the gutter,” he whispered near her ear, making her flush with guilt.

  Amused and not bothering to hide it, he caught her hand and took her along with them back to the kitchen.

  For once, Kevin looked excited. “We’re going to the drive-in.”

  “I heard.” Needing to touch him, she combed her fingers through his unruly hair. It was overlong, but a haircut was the least of her priorities right now. “I haven’t been there in forever, but it’s perfect weather for it.”

  He chewed his bottom lip. “Jesse said we could take his truck and sit in the back.”

  “Sounds like a plan.” Before he got fed up with her mothering, she dropped her hand.

  Love walked in, twining around each and every leg before stopping by Kevin. The cat stared up at him with her different-colored eyes.

  Always attentive to the cat, Kevin immediately knelt down and scratched her head. “Think she’ll be okay if we’re all gone?” He stroked along the length of her back. “She might have the babies soon.”

  “If she does,” Merrily assured him, “she’ll know what to do. But what a great surprise that would be, huh?”

  “I hope she waits till I’m here with her.” He dropped down to sit against the kitchen wall, gently urging the cat into his lap. “I don’t want her to be alone.”

  And even that, such a caring sentiment, left Tonya’s throat tight.

  “Tell you what.” Merrily knelt down beside him. “How about I get my pet sitter to come stay with her, and if she goes into labor she can give us a call? What do you think?”

  “You have a pet sitter?”

  “I do. Sort of like a kid sitter.” She patted his knee. “You had those when you were younger, right?”

  Without answering, he did some quiet thinking, then shifted his troubled gaze to Tonya. “Maybe it’d be easier if I just stayed here with her. I mean, if you want.”

  Maybe it was past time she actually told him what she wanted. His room was almost done, he’d been with her now for a couple of weeks and they really needed to get some things bought for school.

  They needed an understanding.

  Turning to the others, Tonya asked with a smile, “Could I have a second with Kevin, please?”

  Brick nodded. “We’ll wait in the living room.” He and Merrily stepped out.

  Pausing by her, Jesse cupped the back of her neck and kissed her, warm and firm, right on her mouth. That kiss felt like reassurance that she was doing the right thing. Like backup if she needed it.

  Like caring, whether she’d admitted to wanting it yet or not.

  Lightening the mood, he winked at Kevin and left.

  Tonya’s thoughts scrambled, trying to find a toehold on the right thing to say. She wasn’t good at this, not like she’d been good at so many other things. Real estate, managing her money, planning her future—as a single woman with no children—yes, she’d been great at that.

  But this...talking with a troubled boy, not so much. She felt totally out of her depth.

  But then, she hadn’t been good at being a sister, either. At least, not the type of sister Cissy had apparently needed.

  Suddenly realizing how Kevin eyed her, she asked, “What?”

  “You guys do a lot of kissing.”

  Her smile slipped. “Well...”

  “It’s not like how my mom was always kissing guys though.”

  Oh God. How much had he seen with his mother? “How is it different?”

  “The guys, mostly.” His expression hardened. “They were gross.”

  “Jesse’s not gross.”

  “No.” He eyed her again. “He likes you. He’s nice.”

  “Very nice.” Had the men she’d brought around not really liked Cissy? “So you don’t min
d him being here?”

  Kevin shook his head, looked away and asked, “Does he mind me being here?”

  “No!” She went to her knees beside him. “Jesse likes you, you know that.”

  “But—”

  Shoulders back, she said with assurance, “If he didn’t, then he could take a hike.”

  His blue eyes, so much like his mother’s—so much like her own—widened.

  “But he does,” Tonya promised him. “He told me so. Heck, he’s told you so, even if he hasn’t outright said it. Why else would he want to fix up your room and take you to the drive-in and—”

  “Because he likes you.” Kevin concentrated on the cat rather than look at her. “And I don’t want to get in the way.”

  “You couldn’t, so please don’t ever think that.” Bottom lip caught in her teeth and her brows knit together, she settled herself beside Kevin there on the kitchen floor. “How come we always end up on the floor?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Well, I do. You get down here to help make Love comfortable. That’s such a nice thing to do.” She brought her knees up, clasped her hands together and looked at him.

  Kevin avoided her gaze.

  “I figured we should talk.”

  He shrugged. “Okay.”

  “First, though, I’m not sure what kind of guys Cissy brought around, but Jesse would never use you to get to me. He’s not that way. He’s a really good man, because if he wasn’t, I wouldn’t allow him to be around you.”

  His brows kept twitching, but he didn’t say anything, either to accept or reject her assurances.

  “And he would never consider you in the way. You need to get that idea out of your head. In fact, I’m sure he enjoys your company.”

  Kevin looked at her like she was nuts. “He enjoys your company.”

  It hurt, but she got her mouth to smile. “Well, sure he does. I’m fun to be around, right?”

  Sounding very unsure, Kevin said, “Yeah.”

  She didn’t let his lack of conviction bother her. “You’re fun too. And so is Jesse.”

  Kevin kept quiet.

  “I like Jesse, and I hope you do too.”

  “Sure.”