Southern Ruby

by Belinda Alexandra

  ‘Aren’t you scared?’ I asked her, cringing at the obscene words.

  ‘When I get one of these, I ask myself how Mother would have reacted.’ She tore up the notes, including mine, and tossed the scraps into the fireplace in her parlour. ‘She would have said that these notes were sent by cowards, because only cowards write threatening letters and don’t sign their names. So who’s going to be afraid of a coward?’

  Kitty’s words got me thinking that the wreath might have been sent by Aunt Elva. After all, she’d been sick enough to show poor Ruby Nell Bridges a Negro doll in a baby casket. Well, I wasn’t afraid of old Aunt Elva. She was full of hot air.

  My mind was further set at ease by the bravado of the other women in Save Our Schools when I learned at the next meeting that several of them had been shot at.

  ‘They just want to scare us,’ Grace said. ‘The most important thing is that you never let those crazy people inside your head. You mustn’t let their distorted view of life get to you.’

  I forgot about the death threat as things gradually settled down at the schools. The mobs thinned and white children began to return to their classes unmolested. Even little Ruby Nell Bridges didn’t need the protection of the Federal marshals any more.

  The following month, Philomena returned to Biloxi to help her elderly mother after she’d had a fall. The house and children were too much for Mae to handle on her own, so I helped out where I could. I didn’t mind because it kept me busy. One morning, when I was trying to work out how to assemble the vacuum cleaner, I glanced out the window into the garden and saw Mae collecting the cut flowers for the day from Ned.

  ‘Oh, my!’ I gasped when I saw the way Ned smiled at Mae, and the way she blushed in return. ‘How long has this been going on?’

  I watched their giggling and eye-batting a little longer before I turned my attention back to the vacuum cleaner. Mae was in love! The thought of it tickled me pink.

  Clifford and I had already planned to take good care of Mae when she retired, with a generous pension and a house of her own, and she would always remain part of the family. But I’d been worried that she would be lonely once she didn’t have the children — or me — to look after any more. Now I was glad that she would have the company of a very good man.

  My light mood was cut short when Clarita Galafate appeared at the door looking flustered. ‘Ruby,’ she said, ‘Clifford collapsed at the office.’

  My knees buckled. Terrible images of the day Helen died crowded my mind. ‘What do you mean?’ I asked, trying to catch my breath. ‘Where is he?’

  ‘He was stable when they put him in the ambulance,’ said Clarita, taking my arm to steady me. ‘I’ll drive you to the hospital now to see him. It’s exhaustion, I’m sure. You know how hard he and Christophe have been working.’

  I told Mae we were going to the hospital and to look after the children. On the way in Clarita’s car, I stared out the window and berated myself. I should have seen this coming. Clifford hadn’t slept properly for months but had kept himself going on multiple cups of strong black coffee. I’d hoped that now progress was being made, he’d ease off. I wished I’d been more forceful with him that he needed to rest. What would the children and I do if something happened to him? He was their beloved daddy — and my best friend.

  Clifford was dozing when we arrived at the hospital and were shown to his private room.

  ‘I’ll be out here,’ Clarita said, taking a seat in the waiting area.

  I sat in the visitor’s chair beside the bed and took Clifford’s hand. His face was so pale I could see the blue veins under his eyelids. ‘Oh, Cliff,’ I said. ‘How did I let this happen to you?’ His eyes flickered for a moment before they opened, and a smile stretched across his face.

  ‘Hello, beautiful,’ he said.

  I tried to say something back but the words snagged in my throat.

  He put his hand on his chest and looked rueful. ‘The doctor said my ticker isn’t in such good shape. Apparently I have the heart of a sixty-year-old man.’

  I sighed and kissed his palm. ‘You’ve got to slow down, honey. You’ve pushed so hard and things are changing. Let others take over for a while.’

  He stroked my hair. ‘You’re right, Ruby. For your sake and the children’s, I’ve got to pace myself better.’

  We sat quietly for a while, then Clifford looked into my eyes and said: ‘Do you even realise how exceptional you are, Ruby? You’ve been tested time and time again and yet you haven’t broken.’

  ‘We all break, Cliff. Maybe I’ve just never been pushed beyond my limits.’

  Our conversation was interrupted by the arrival of Kitty and Eddie.

  ‘What are you doing in the hospital, Cliff?’ Kitty cried, smothering her brother in kisses. ‘If you die, I’ll never forgive you!’

  She began bustling about the room, adjusting the window blind and ordering Eddie to find a vase for the flowers they’d brought. After she’d retucked the bedsheets so that Clifford looked like he was pinned under them and propped him up on two pillows instead of one, she sat down and sent him a stern look.

  ‘Even the hardiest of us need a break, you know,’ she said. ‘I never would have survived the schools debacle if I hadn’t kept up my tennis and gotten a weekly massage. Now as soon as you are out of here, I’m booking us all a cabin on Avery Island. We are going to have a family holiday together — and no arguments! You won’t do anyone any good if you drop dead.’ Then she turned and winked at me.

  I was transported back to that tennis game where I had partnered with Clifford to play her and Eddie. Kitty had been so bossy then and it had annoyed me, but now I realised how lucky I was to have her for a sister-in-law. Sometimes somebody had to take charge.

  When the visiting hour was up, a nurse arrived to tell us we had to go. As we were leaving the room, Clifford called me back.

  ‘No matter what happens, Ruby,’ he said solemnly, ‘I want you to know that I love you and I love our children. If I had to live my life over, I’d do it all exactly the same way again. Promise me, if anything should happen to me, you will continue the fight. Our children deserve a better world. All the children deserve a better world.’

  I was surprised by his seriousness. When I thought of all Clifford had achieved for civil rights, I felt immense pride. But when I looked at him lying in that hospital bed, pale and exhausted, I feared for our future. I didn’t want to grow old without him.

  ‘I won’t give up,’ I said. ‘But you have to promise me you’ll take better care of yourself.’

  ‘You’re looking exhausted too,’ Kitty told me as she, Eddie, Clarita and I made our way to the parking lot. ‘We can’t have you collapsing as well. Let Eddie and me look after Dale and Louise for a few nights. That way you can care for Clifford without having to worry about everything else — and we’d be delighted to have them.’

  I hated to be separated from the children, but I knew Kitty was right. I needed a rest so I could concentrate on helping Clifford recuperate. But when she and Eddie picked them up the following night, I despaired at how lonely the house felt without my husband and the children in it. I even missed Theodore, the dog. Dale, who was deeply attached to him, had taken him to Kitty and Eddie’s home too, but I kept listening for his pattering paws on the floorboards and expecting the feel of his soft muzzle nudging me to get my attention.

  I took a seat in an armchair in the sitting room and leaned my head back. From the garden came voices: Mae saying good night to Ned, who lived in the gardener’s cottage.

  ‘You put the potato poultice I made for you on that cut tonight like I showed you,’ Mae said. ‘It will be good by tomorrow. See you in the morning, sugar pie.’

  I smiled and hoped she and Ned would announce their engagement soon. We could use the summerhouse for the wedding ceremony, like when Clifford and I got married, and Ned could choose the bouquet from his favourite flowers in the garden.

  I heard Mae come inside and go to her room
next to the kitchen. I picked up Adventures of Huckleberry Finn and read the first chapter, bringing back comforting memories of Maman and me reading it together. But the fire was dying and the room was turning cold. I decided to read more of the book in the warmth of my bed.

  I turned off the lights and climbed the stairs to our bedroom. Once I’d changed into my nightdress and snuggled into bed, I picked up the book again. But I was exhausted and fell asleep with the bedside light still on. I dreamed I was Jewel again, on stage at the Vieux Carré Club, dancing to ‘Chloe’. I turned and caught a glimpse of Leroy through the curtain with his band. A wave of tenderness washed over me. You haven’t gone, I thought. You’ve been with me the whole time, watching over me like you promised you would.

  Then the music stopped and Leroy shouted, ‘Wake up!’ I jolted and opened my eyes. My thoughts were clumsy and slow and it took a moment for me to remember I wasn’t Jewel on the stage at the Vieux Carré; I was in my bedroom in the house on Prytania Street and I was Mrs Clifford Lalande.

  I rubbed my forehead and reached over to turn off the light. An eerie sensation sent a chill down my spine. I felt a presence in the room.

  I turned to the door. A man was standing there, staring at me. Stark cold terror clawed at my heart. I knew him, although he didn’t know me, as Ruby. He was older and rougher-looking, with a short beard and a scar under his eye. But his aura of malevolence was unmistakable. It was Jimmy, the former barman from the Vieux Carré Club.

  ‘Hello, Mrs Lalande,’ he said, in a voice that was chillingly calm. ‘Isn’t it a shame your husband’s not home.’

  A sickening sensation crept over my skin. I no longer had to guess who had shot at our window and sent the wreath. My gaze fell to the rope between his hands. I tried to scream, but I had no air in my lungs. A strangled ‘Help!’ that nobody would hear died in my throat. He moved towards the bed. I struggled to extricate myself from the sheets, but my foot got caught and I tumbled to the floor.

  Jimmy grabbed me, but I managed to get myself on my feet and slip from his grasp. I ran for the door, but he caught the sleeve of my nightdress and dragged me back.

  ‘Where are you going?’ The stench of whiskey on his breath was nauseating.

  He spun me round and slammed me into the wall. Then he pulled me forward before slamming me into it again. I tasted blood in my mouth.

  ‘I’ve been watching you and your husband,’ he hissed. ‘You won’t get away from me, you nigger-loving bitch!’ His eyes looked up to the ceiling pendant. ‘I’m going to string you up like one of those niggers you love so much.’

  Panic ran through me. I struggled against him and clawed at the curtains in an attempt to get away. They tumbled down to the floor. Jimmy threw me onto the bed and put his knee in my back. I felt him slip the rough rope around my neck. I was going to lose this battle and there was something I wanted to know. Something that had disturbed me for years.

  ‘Did you kill Leroy Thezan?’ I gasped.

  Jimmy turned me around to face him and squinted at me. ‘I’ve heard your voice before,’ he said.

  It dawned on me then. That night he’d attacked me and Leroy, I’d forgotten my Jewel voice and screamed at him as Ruby.

  ‘I know you,’ he said, his eyes glinting. Then he realised where from and his eyes opened wide. ‘You’re that little hussy Jewel, ain’t you?’ He emitted a low whistle, like he’d just been given a million dollars, and laughed menacingly. ‘Who’d have thought that grand Mrs Lalande is a slut!’

  I sensed he was going to find killing me even more pleasurable now as he’d be settling old scores. There were only seconds of my life left and I repeated my question. ‘Did you kill Leroy Thezan?’

  He tightened the rope and frowned as if thinking over dozens of Negroes he’d killed, perhaps too many to recall. Then he sniggered. ‘Yeah, I remember killing that nigger,’ he boasted. ‘I killed him like a dog I didn’t need no more. He begged for his life but I killed him anyway.’

  It took my last ounce of air to spit in his face. He slapped me so hard I almost blacked out. He stood up on my chest so I couldn’t move and slung the other end of the rope through the light fixture. My arms flailed as he pulled and the world around me began to fade. For a moment I felt the terror of all the innocent souls who had perished this way.

  There was a sound like a crack. I thought he must have broken my neck, but he let go of the rope. His eyes rolled back in his head and he fell to the floor.

  I looked up to see Mae holding the cast-iron monkey I used as a doorstop. Blood dripped from it.

  I rolled over and looked at Jimmy lying on the rug. His eyes were half-open but glazed over and his lips were curled back. For a moment Mae and I didn’t say anything. ‘Is he dead?’ she asked, finally.

  Blood was seeping from his mouth now. Mae must have given him one hell of a hit. I got off the bed and grabbed his arm, repulsed by the clammy feel of his skin, and searched for a pulse.

  ‘He’s dead,’ I confirmed.

  Mae sat on the end of the bed and rocked backwards and forwards. ‘I killed a white man,’ she wailed. ‘They’re going to hang me, Mrs Ruby. They’re going to hang me or electrocute me like they did to that other woman.’

  ‘Hush, hush,’ I said and put my arm around her, still trying to convince myself that what had happened was real and not just a bad dream. The other woman Mae referred to had been a white woman, a cold-blooded killer who’d shot a salesman. She was the only woman ever to have been electrocuted in Louisiana. ‘You killed this monster to save me, Mae.’

  But even as I spoke the words, I knew she was right. With the current atmosphere of hate and fear that pervaded New Orleans, I couldn’t be sure what would happen with an all-white jury in a segregated courthouse. Perhaps if Mae had defended any other white woman, that woman’s testimony would be considered enough to exonerate her. But right now the Lalandes were one of the most vilified families in New Orleans for our stance on integration. Justice did not work in the South the way it should. Any of the white supremacist judges might view executing our loyal maid as revenge for our criticism of them.

  I rubbed my head and tried to think. There was no way I could take the chance of calling the police.

  ‘They’re not going to hang you, Mae, because we aren’t going to tell anybody about this,’ I said finally.

  Mae’s eyes showed their whites, like she was a frightened horse. ‘What are we going to do?’

  I was too busy formulating a plan to answer her. ‘Go wake up Ned and tell him to come quickly.’

  TWENTY-SEVEN

  Amanda

  ‘That’s why you won’t let anybody repair the porch!’ I cried.

  I leaned forward and waited for Grandma Ruby to confess how she, Ned and Mae had carried Jimmy’s body down the stairs, stripped it of all identification, removed the porch boards and, in the dead of night, dug a grave. Instead, she looked at me blankly and said, ‘Amandine, have you lost your mind? Why would we have buried that monster here?’

  She straightened her shoulders and lifted her chin. ‘I called on Sam Coppola for the first time since I’d left the Vieux Carré Club. He sent some men to pick up the body. Jimmy ended up where he has always belonged — in the swamp!’ Despite her proud posture, uncertainty flashed in her eyes. ‘You can’t expect me to be sorry. Not after what he did to Leroy! Not after what he intended to do to me!’

  I wondered if I really had lost my mind from hearing too many revelations in one night. It was a moment before I could explain myself.

  ‘It’s difficult for me,’ I told her. ‘It’s not as if everything is coming together neatly in a logical way. One moment I have a piece of the puzzle solved, and the next I’m swept off balance by a surprise revelation. I thought you were going to tell me why my father was drunk the night of the accident.’

  Grandma Ruby lowered her eyes and twisted the rings on her fingers. I knew this was difficult for her too. She was telling me things that she’d never revealed to anyo
ne else. I felt a kinship with her in that regard: the past wasn’t always the pleasant, romantic thing we wanted it to be. My past felt like a shark that could emerge from the depths any time to take a chunk out of me.

  ‘I understand about Jimmy,’ I continued. ‘He tried to kill you, and you had no choice but to protect Mae. I probably wouldn’t have gone to the police either in those circumstances. But there is something under the porch that you don’t want anyone to find, isn’t there?’

  She looked at me intently. ‘When I hid what I did under the porch, I never expected it to be brought to light again, but time and nature have worked against me. The porch is rotting. It’s like watching an old tomb crumble and not doing anything to fix it.’ She clenched her hands together so tightly that her knuckles turned white. ‘It’s better we take it out together, and then you and Oliver can fix the porch. I wouldn’t want anybody but you to see it. Perhaps I can be strong enough if you’re with me.’

  Goosebumps pricked my skin. What on earth was hidden under there? Something worse than a decomposed body? I wasn’t sure if I was ready to know.

  Grandma Ruby stood and walked to the door. ‘Oliver keeps a crowbar and a spade in the potting shed. I’ll get the key.’

  ‘Now?’ I said.

  She turned back to me. ‘If we don’t do it now, I may never find the strength again to face it.’

  The air had a tinge of coolness, but it was still humid. I stuck the crowbar into a gap in the porch floor and pried up one of the boards. Sweat rolled down my back and prickled my skin. A mosquito added to my discomfort by biting me several times on the back of the knee and causing itchy welts.

  The floorboards were half rotted and I could lift them without having to saw them. Before long I found myself staring into the dark space under the porch. The earth smelled pungent. I wished we could’ve waited till the sun came up so I could see better, but it was Oliver’s day for work and Grandma Ruby had insisted that it was now or never to uncover what was there.