Waterworld (Hot Dating Agency Book 2)

by J. S. Wilder

  The Peoples ranged across thousands of planets, each with a slightly different atmosphere and gravity. The nanites took care of the atmosphere, but the Hedordian gravity was higher than Earth and my adopted home of Fire. Where the Fires looked like gymnasts, ripped and toned to perfection, the Hedordians looked like weightlifters with their giant arms, powerful legs, and beefy shoulders. They generally weren’t as tall as the Fires males, but much more powerfully built.

  The Hedordians were an entertaining mix of contrasts. They were all huge guys, but very gentle. In my interviews with them, I could tell they were put off by the aggressiveness of the Fire women. They were used to pursuing and winning the lady, and to have a Fire walk up to them and asking them to mate, which was a possibility if one of them took a Fire’s fancy, was going to be a problem.

  The Hedordians were as I imagined men were like in the late nineteenth and early twentieth centuries back on Earth. They protected their women, gallantly standing in the face of danger and sacrificing themselves so their mates could live. It was noble on the face of it, but not something the Fires were likely to find appealing.

  Where I had challenged the Fires to soften, I’d issued the challenge to Hedordians to prove to me they were man enough to handle the Fire women. At first, they’d scoffed, but then they realized I was serious and was doubting their manhood. I saw them harden. Like the Fires, they were dead set to prove me wrong.

  I wasn’t sure when push came to shove if they actually had it in them, at least at first, to go toe to toe with the Fires, but as I watched them talking to each other, I could tell this was going to be a lot easier than matching up the Fires and the Waters had been.

  -oOo-

  I slumped in my chair. I’d gotten the Hedordians and Fires off to a start two days earlier, and it seemed to go well. The Fire women were on their best behavior, allowing the Hedordians to take the lead. It wasn’t unusual for a Fire to walk up another Fire they’d never met but found sexually appealing, and the first words out of his or her mouth were to ask if other person wanted to mate. That wasn’t how the Hedordians worked, and a few of the Fire women had expressed frustration with the slow methodical pace, but they were letting it play out.

  The Waters, however, were going to be the end of me. I’d paired them up with the Estaanayouk, the only Peoples I could find that I thought would have the patience to tolerate the Water males.

  The Estaans, as I called them, were a quiet, introspective people. They were the philosophers of the universe. They were given to contemplating things such as the role of the Ancient Ones and why they’d seeded the universe with their kind but left no trace of themselves, not even a memory when they left and moved on to other planets. To give them their credit, the Estaans were more patient with the Waters than I was.

  I tried to not let the Waters get to me, but just like when I was working with the Water females, teaching them to not be so submissive, I wanted to grab the Water males by the shoulders and give them a shake to wake them up. The women could be demure, so long as they didn’t let men run over them, but the males were going to have to step up. They simply had no sex drive to speak of and not a hint of aggression. I didn’t want men that were aggressive assholes that slapped their women around, but a little aggression was necessary to come-on to a woman, and these people had zero.

  I just couldn’t understand it. The Estaanayouk women were stunningly beautiful. They were tiny, most barely five feet tall, with blonde hair and slight builds. All had small noses, most with a cute upturn at the end, and while their eyes were about normal sized, in their diminutive frame they looked as large as the Aquallian’s. If they’d had wings they’d looked like pixies.

  The Waters were upset that their own women were mating outside their People and giving them the cold shoulder, but here were potential mates that seemed to like them, and they couldn’t seem to get one foot in front of the other to do anything about it. The Estaanayouk were doing all the work and the Waters were letting them down, just like their own women.

  I was shuttling between Fire and Estaan, working with the two groups, but I was thinking about throwing in the towel on the Aquallian males. They deserved to die out. I frowned at my spiteful thought. That wasn’t fair and I knew it was just my frustrations taking control of me again, but dammit, they infuriated me like no group of men I’d ever met.

  I pulled at my bottom lip, trying to figure out what to do. “Tokalas!” I called.

  He stepped into the room that had been given to me to work with. “Yes?”

  “How do you feel about helping me out again with a little demonstration?”

  He chuckled. “I’d be delighted to kiss you again.”

  I grinned. I knew he was kidding and that he wouldn’t dishonor Stevan or himself by doing so.

  “How’d you like to kiss an Estaan instead?”

  He paused. “They’re lovely but so fragile looking. I’d be afraid I’d shatter her.”

  “They’re not made of glass, Tokalas. Just be gentle, like we’ve talked about. Think you can do that for me?”

  He bowed his head. “Of course. Why?”

  “Because these fucking… because these Water men don’t know what to do with a woman anymore. They don’t know how to engage with one, and they don’t know what to do when one engages with them. I want you to show them.”

  He bowed his head again. “I stand at your weak side.”

  I grinned. “Good. Our pupils are scheduled to arrive in about eight clicks. Set it up with Peval. I want you in the room with me when they arrive.”

  “By your leave,” he said as he turned crisply and marched away.

  I watched his retreating back then rose. Maybe lightning would strike twice.

  I spent the next two hours working with the Estaans and Waters, using Tokalas as a prop. His job was to do what came naturally when an attractive woman spoke to him as I coached the Waters, asking for suggestions on what Tokalas should do to encourage the Estaan women.

  It was a slow, hard slog, but a few of the Waters seemed to get it if nothing other than as an academic exercise. They were still just as submissive as ever, but the Estaans were becoming bold, enjoying the game with the Fire. I’d hoped the Waters would get into the spirit and I had several of the more outgoing Waters to take Tokalas’s place. Typically, the moment it was their turn to indicate interest to encourage the woman that was flirting with them, they didn’t. I felt my frustration bubbling to the top again.

  I pulled Tokalas aside. “I’m going to pair you up with Verery next. See if you can get her to kiss you.”

  He flashed me a crooked, impish smiled. “Should I kiss her back?”

  I giggled. “If you like. But you have to let her make the first move, okay? Can you do that for me?”

  He bowed his head but said nothing.

  “Verery, you’re up,” I said as I motioned to Tokalas. “Show us how you express interest in a man.”

  It took nearly thirty minutes, but I could tell that Tokalas was winning her over. I’d been working with him in private for the past couple of weeks, coaching him as part of his finding a mate, and he did an admirable job controlling his Fire impulses.

  Like all the Fire males, Tokalas was damned attractive and Verery had obviously either gotten into the game or had stopped pretending. She was leaning in closer and holding his gaze as she touched him on his arm or shoulder.

  I was watching the Waters so intently, trying to get a read on them, trying to see if any of this was getting through to them, that I almost missed the kiss.

  Tokalas pulled back from the gentle kiss, Verery sighing and smiling up at him. We were nearing the end of the class and I was ready to wrap it up and get out of there. Tokalas was meeting the first woman I wanted to pair him up with later this evening and I wanted to spend a final few minutes with him before I introduced them to each other.

  “See how easy that was?” I asked, glaring at the Aquallians. “How was it?” I asked Tokalas.

&nb
sp; Verery was still watching his face. He’d been extra gentle with her, and I could tell she liked what he’d done to her.

  “It was nice,” he said, smiling down at the tiny woman. “It was very nice.”

  I wanted to end on the positive note of Tokalas getting kissed and I’d had all I could stand from the Waters today. It was clear to everyone, at least the women in the room, that Verery wouldn’t mind if Tokalas kissed her again, but this wasn’t to pair up the Estaans and the Fires, it was to pair up the Estaans and the Waters.

  “I have a homework assignment for you tonight. Dinner together. That’s it. I want everyone in this group to have dinner with another member… but!” I added, knowing what the Waters would do if I didn’t clarify what I wanted, “while it’s okay to go as groups, there has to be an equal number of men and women in each group.”

  I stared the Waters down. They’d said they were interested in mating with the Estaans and had volunteered to participate, so by God, they were going to participate. They were going out a date and have fun or I was going to put my Hurellat covered foot right up their ass.

  -oOo-

  “You ready?” I asked Tokalas.

  He smiled at me. “A Hedordian?”

  I smiled back. “She’s lovely, Tokalas, and very interested in meeting you. Just be yourself.”

  “I can’t thank you enough, my Lady.”

  I smiled and I could feel tears threatening. Tokalas was a good man and he deserved to be happy and have a family. I gave him a gentle pat on the chest.

  “You’ve been a good student, Tokalas. It’s been my pleasure. Come on, let’s not keep your companion waiting.”

  I ushered Tokalas into the opulent palace guest room where Lurell was waiting. I’d invited her to be my guest in the palace for the evening. Like most Hedordian woman, she was powerfully built, the result of hard labor and the heavy gravity. She stood three or four inches shorter than my own five foot five, and I had dressed her to show off her muscular legs and arms. Where Fire women were lean, like a marathoner, Hedordian women were lushly figured like the Aquallians.

  Lurell had a lovely face, round with a bright open smile, and her face lit up at the sight of her companion for the evening. She rose slowly from the comfortable chair. Tokalas was used to being the aggressor, and Lurell was used to being pursued, so the introductions should go smoothly.

  Lurell Grambliweith, allow me to introduce Tokalastherious Keretyartherat,” I said, stumbling over and butchering his name as I did with all the Fires.

  “Call me Tokalas,” he said, stepping forward and taking her shoulder in the traditional Fire greeting.

  “Nice to meet you, Tokalas,” Lurell said, as she touched her lips with her first two fingers and then extended her hand in a return greeting. She glanced at me as her smile spread. “Lady Catherina told me how handsome you were, but I think she undersold you.”

  Tokalas smiled. “Thank you, Lurell. She would tell me nothing of you, only that you wished to be my companion for the evening.” He glanced at me. “She has chosen well.”

  I smiled and opened a portal. In the palace, only a select few could open a portal, and any attempt by someone without authorization would fail and set off alarms that would result in palace guards arriving on the run. That wasn’t how I wanted Tokalas’s and Lurell’s date to start.

  Tokalas was taking Lurell to one of the finest restaurants on Fire, then off to Water to see Folu Rain. She didn’t know it yet, but I had suggested it to Tokalas when she expressed an interest in seeing it during our interviews.

  “Go. You don’t want to be late,” I said while making shooing gestures with my hands.

  Tokalas extended his elbow and Lurell slid her arm through the opening as I’d coached them. It was a very old-fashioned Human custom, but it served well to pull the partners in close and have them touch. It was a new and unique idea on all the planets I’d visited so far and the Peoples seemed to enjoy the novelty of it.

  The portal closed and I relaxed with a sigh. It was a good thing I enjoyed my work because it was exhausting… especially when working with the Aquallian men. It was far too early to start patting myself on the back in success, but it appeared that Lurell and Tokalas were going to hit it off. I smiled to myself as I turned to the door and left the guest room. If only all the pairings I came up with were this easy.

  Eight

  Stevan

  I smiled across the table at Catherina. I’d have much preferred to sit beside her, but here on Letozlet, custom dictated that men were placed on one side of the table, the women the other.

  I knew she’d rather not be here. She never complained when I asked her to attend a formal function, but neither was I so blind that I couldn’t see the reluctance with which she attended. While in public, she was as charming and winning as ever, but I knew she would much prefer to be working with people who needed her help.

  Normally, I allowed her to stay behind, citing the importance of her work, but Letozlet was a special case. If I didn’t have a mate on my arm, one would be provided for me. Here, the Peoples did everything as pairs, and to attend a formal state function without a companion at my side would be scandalous.

  I felt rather bad for her. While the nanites would prevent the food we ate from harming us, they didn’t do anything for the taste. The Letozlets used a root native to their planet as a spice in most of their dishes, a spice that gave the food a bitter, rancid taste. The Letozlets loved it, but most of the rest of the universe despised it, and their traditional food was the joke of the universe. To tell a cook you’d eaten better on Letozlet was a scathing insult. Through trial and error, I’d learned which dishes used the spice lightly and which didn’t, and ate mostly those that weren’t heavily spiced. Catherina, on the other hand, was being helped by the two Letozlets to either side, and they were suggesting mostly foods loaded with the root.

  I had to hide my smile in my napkin when she looked at me with pleading eyes, but there was nothing I could do to help her. I couldn’t very well insult our hosts by suggesting their food tasted bad. As the meal progressed, Catherina nodded and smiled, tasting everything that was suggested. She may not enjoy being my Lady on occasions such as these, but she did her duty well.

  I was on Letozlet meeting with First One, Letozlet’s leader. The Letozlet leader was unique in the universe in that nobody knew his actual name. When he assumed the rank of First One, all mention of his given name was scrubbed from the records and was replaced with First One. It was both a title and a name and served to remind all that the man no longer existed and that he had devoted his life to the Letozlet people.

  After the vote on Pearakut had gone decisively my way, more and more Peoples were coming around to the idea that I hadn’t technically broken the Prime Law. I might have broken the spirit of the law, but I had done it with the best of intentions and only in the most dire of circumstances. The Aquallians were the first to make a public statement that they would stand with the Firaspatciti, issuing their announcement only hours after the results of the Pearakut vote was known. The Thath, another culture whose birthrate had slipped below sustainability, had followed the next day, and now the Letozlet were joining the chorus. The Letozlet were an important addition to those voicing support. Their birth rate was low and still falling, but it hadn’t yet dropped below the threshold to sustain them. Nobody could accuse them of supporting me simply because they needed Catherina’s help.

  I hadn’t told Catherina how concerned I’d been as the uprising grew. Only Kergah knew of the stress I’d been under and the concerns I had. To defend myself could make me appear guilty, but ignoring the issue had allowed the movement to grow.

  Had the Peoples demanded adjudication, and I lost, I would have submitted myself for punishment. While I was sure the Firaspatciti people would stand behind me if I chose not to submit to the judgment, I wouldn’t risk having Firaspatciti banished from the Peoples of the universe. The thought of my people facing the long darkness alone, never
interacting with our brothers and sisters again, was too terrible to contemplate. Now it appeared that threat was behind me and I felt as if a great weight had been lifted from my shoulders. Even the foulness of my meal couldn’t dampen my spirits.

  First One stood and the eight of us at the table immediately quieted. He looked at me and smiled, holding his left hand at his ear, palm forward, indicating he was going to make a statement and we should take heed of his words.

  “Stevanualfutherac Gerretterdedsath, Lord of the Firaspatciti,” he said grandly, and I smiled. Catherina wasn’t the only person to have trouble with our names. “Great is the man who places the lives of his People, the lives of all the Peoples, ahead of his own. No greater gift could be given or asked.” He then turned and smiled at Catherina. “To his lovely joined, whose wisdom may save us all from the long darkness, we thank you for taking the time from your most important work to fellowship with us. May you both prosper with long life and happiness.”

  When he pulled his hand from his ear, I grabbed at the air, as did everyone else at the table, and held my palm to my chest for a moment, indicating I had heard his words and made them part of me. Catherina then rose, as my joined. It was her duty to thank our hosts.

  She held her hand to her ear. “To you, First One. Thank you for a lovely evening, and may your good wishes be returned to you a hundredfold.”

  We all grabbed the air again.

  “Lord Gerretterdedsath, the Letozlet statement of our support will be released tomorrow,” First One said. “All of Letozlet was touched by your moving speech on Pearakut.”

  I bowed my head. “Thank you, First One. The support of the Letozlet people means a great deal to me.”

  First One smiled. The man was approaching the end of his life and a new First One would soon take his place. He was one of the longest serving leaders in the universe and commanded a great deal of respect for his steady leadership. The universe would be losing a great man when he finally met his joined in the long darkness.