Ravensong

by TJ Klune

  “Are you okay?” I asked, panicked. Thomas and Mark were in town, and I’d been asked to watch over Elizabeth.

  “Yeah,” Carter said, voice high and sweet. “Okay?”

  “Okay,” she said. “More than. This one is… active. Here, Gordo. Feel.”

  I moved slowly and carefully, making sure to avoid little fingers and toes below me. Carter latched on to my leg, gnawing on my pants and growling in a low voice.

  Elizabeth took my hand and placed it against her belly.

  At first, there was nothing.

  Then—

  A push back against my palm and fingers. A pulse of something low and happy. My tattoos flared along my arms.

  “Is that…?” I asked in awe.

  “He knows you,” she said, a quiet smile on her face. “He knows his pack is waiting for him.”

  IN THE end, it wasn’t as I planned.

  I didn’t say everything I’d practiced with Elizabeth.

  Mark came through the door, followed by his brother, and I said, “The baby touched me and made my magic glow, and it was weird because I know it’s supposed to be a wonderful thing, but I think it was my fault because all I was doing was practicing telling you that if you gave me your wolf, I’d take it, but I am a witch, so I could neuter you where you stood, you understand me? And—”

  Mark Bennett gathered me in his arms, and there I stayed for the longest time.

  THE SECOND thing.

  “She wants to see you now,” Thomas said. He looked tired, and his hair stuck out every which way, but his eyes were bright.

  He held open the door for me.

  Light filtered in from the large wall of windows that opened out to the forest behind the Bennett house. The sky above was gray. Little drops of rain splattered against the glass, trickling down. The scent of blood was thick in the air. Below us, wolves moved throughout the house. Osmond and others from back East, here to help Elizabeth through the birth of her second child.

  She sat propped up against pillows in the bed. She was pale, and her hair was pulled back loosely. She wore no makeup, and there were dark circles under her eyes, but I didn’t think she’d ever looked more beautiful.

  “Hello,” she said. “Would you like to meet the newest member of our pack?”

  He lay cradled in her arms, tucked tightly in a deep blue blanket. He wore a cap over his head. His skin was pink and wrinkled. His eyes were shut, and he squirmed slightly. His mouth opened, then closed, opened, then closed.

  Elizabeth said, “His name is Kelly.”

  “Kelly,” I whispered in awe.

  I leaned down and kissed him on the cheek. I told him quietly that I was very happy to meet him. That he was very lucky to have the parents he did. That I would always keep him safe, no matter what.

  Thomas watched us from the doorway, ever the proud Alpha.

  THE THIRD thing was… I should have seen it. I should have seen it coming.

  I should have known.

  Because nothing lasts forever.

  My mother.

  My father.

  My pack taken from me by the hands of hunters.

  I should have known that everything else would be taken from me too.

  But I didn’t expect it to be because of Thomas Bennett.

  KELLY WAS four months old when Osmond came to the house again on a blustery afternoon.

  He disappeared with Thomas into the office, Mark closing the door behind them. The dark-suited Betas stood outside the house next to nondescript SUVs.

  Elizabeth had a frown on her face as she nursed Kelly.

  Carter was sleeping in his bedroom, the door propped open.

  Elizabeth said, “Gordo, please. A word.”

  The air felt charged. Something was happening.

  I stood before her, a cloth over Kelly and her breast.

  She said, “I need you to listen to me. Can you do that?”

  “Yes.”

  “Whatever happens, whatever is decided, you must remember. You will always be our pack. You will always belong to us, just as much as we belong to you. No matter what. That will never change.”

  My skin itched. The hairs on my neck stood on end. “I don’t understand.”

  “I know you don’t. But I love you. Thomas loves you. Mark loves you. You are the witch to the Bennetts, and you always will be.”

  “What are you—”

  “Gordo.”

  I turned my head.

  Mark stood in the open doorway of Thomas’s office. He looked furious. His eyes flickered between fire and ice. The ends of his fingers were pointed and sharp.

  He said, “Thomas needs to speak with you.”

  IN THE end, it was simple.

  Thomas Bennett was the Alpha of all, just as his father had been before him.

  Green Creek had been a safe haven tucked away from the rest of the world.

  He had been given time to heal. To pick up the pieces of his shattered pack. To make himself whole once again so that he could do what he must. He was a leader, and it was time for him to lead.

  Which meant leaving Green Creek.

  And heading East.

  “But what about school?” I demanded, feeling slightly hysterical. “And my friends. And the garage! I can’t just leave everything—”

  Thomas said, “You won’t be.”

  Silence fell.

  Thomas watched me from across his desk.

  Mark paced angrily behind us.

  Osmond stared blandly at me from near the window.

  But I only had eyes for my Alpha. “I won’t be what.”

  Thomas said, “Green Creek needs to be protected. And I will be entrusting that protection to you. Which is why, Gordo, you will be staying. Here. In Green Creek.”

  I blinked. “What do you mean? I thought you said the pack was leaving.”

  He sat forward in his chair. “We are. Elizabeth. My sons.” His eyes flickered over my shoulder. “Mark. All of us. But you will remain.”

  “You’re leaving me.”

  He reached for me across the desk.

  I pushed my chair back quickly so I was just out of reach.

  That hurt him. I could see it clear on his face.

  Good. I hoped it hurt badly.

  “Gordo,” he said, and he’d never sounded like that when speaking my name, like he was pleading with me. “This was not a decision made lightly. In fact, it is one of the hardest choices I’ve had to make in my life. And you have every right to be angry with me, but I need you to listen. Can you do that for me?”

  “Why?” I asked, my lip curling into a sneer. “Why the fuck should I listen to anything you have to say? You told me the pack was leaving but that I’m not. Obviously that means I’m not your—wait. Wait a goddamn minute.” I closed my eyes, my hands curling into fists at my sides. “How long have you known?”

  “I don’t—”

  “Elizabeth. Just now, she told me—she knew. What was happening. She didn’t just overhear.” I opened my eyes. Thomas’s head was bowed. I glanced over my shoulder at Mark. He wouldn’t look at me. “You all knew. Every single one of you.” I nodded toward Osmond. “It’s why he’s been coming here. You’ve been… what. Planning this? How long?”

  “A while now,” Osmond said. “We were waiting for Kelly to be born before—”

  “Osmond,” Thomas warned.

  “He has a right to know,” Osmond said, furiously calm.

  “You’re damn fucking right I do,” I snarled at them. “How could you even think about leaving me behind? What have I ever done to make you—”

  “You’re human,” Osmond said.

  Mark growled at him angrily. “You don’t get to—”

  “Mark,” Thomas said sharply. “That’s enough.”

  Mark fell silent.

  “And Osmond, if you speak again without prompting, I will ask you to leave my territory. Are we clear?”

  Osmond didn’t looked pleased at that. “Yes, Alpha.”

/>   Thomas looked at me again. I didn’t know what he saw. I was fifteen years old and being betrayed by the one person I never thought capable of such a thing.

  He said, “I need you to hear me. Can you do that, Gordo?”

  I thought about hurting him. Making him feel like I felt. Flayed open and bleeding.

  But I wasn’t my father.

  I nodded tightly.

  He said, “You are human, and wonderfully so. I hope that will never change. But there is… distrust. Amongst the wolves. Because of the hunters. Because of what they have done. We aren’t the only ones who have lost those we loved.”

  I was horrified. “I would never hurt—”

  “I know,” Thomas said. “You have my trust. You always have. I have faith in you, maybe more than anyone else in this world.”

  “But?”

  “But others are not so easily persuaded. There is… fear. Hunters and….”

  “And?”

  “Tell him,” Mark spat from behind me. “He deserves to know. Since you’ve made this decision, you tell him.”

  Thomas’s eyes filled with fire, but it was brief. It faded away, and he was left looking far older than I’d ever seen him. He looked down at his hands. “Livingstone,” he eventually said.

  “What? I don’t—” It hit me then. “My father. They think I’m going to be like my father. I’m human, as were the hunters. I’m a witch, just like my father. And you’re letting them use that against me. They don’t trust me. And since they don’t trust me, you are leaving me here. You chose them over me.”

  “No, Gordo. Never that. I would never—”

  “Then stay here.”

  “He can’t,” Osmond interrupted. “He has a responsibility to—”

  “I don’t give a fuck about responsibility,” I snapped. “I don’t care about who he is to you, to everyone else. He’s my Alpha, and I am asking him to choose me.”

  My mother’s heart had been broken long before I knew what to look for.

  My father’s heart had been broken by the death of his tether, but I never saw it before he exploded in a furious burst of rage and magic.

  This was the first time I’d ever witnessed a heart breaking up close.

  And the fact that it was my Alpha’s heart made it that much worse.

  I could see it, the moment it happened.

  His hands shook and his mouth tightened into a thin line. His breath stuttered in his throat, and he blinked rapidly. In my head, I heard whispers of pack and brother and love, but there was also a song of mourning, and it ached so bitterly that I thought I would fall apart at the midnight-blue weight of it.

  I knew then that nothing I could say would change anything.

  Mark must have too, because there was the telltale sound of clothes tearing as muscles and bones popped and shifted. I turned in time to see a flash of brown as he fled, lost to his wolf.

  The raven fluttered on my arm, its talons digging into the thorns of the roses. It hurt, but I welcomed the pain.

  “Leave us,” Thomas said, never looking away from me.

  “But—”

  “Osmond. Leave us before you’ll have no choice but to crawl from this house.”

  For a moment I thought Osmond was going to defy him. But in the end, he nodded and left, closing the door behind him.

  Somewhere in the house, I could hear Kelly crying.

  Thomas said, “I love you. Always. You must remember that.”

  I said, “I don’t believe you.”

  “You will be taken care of. I’ve asked Marty to—”

  “Marty,” I said with a hollow laugh. “Of course.”

  “I’m trying,” Thomas said, voice breaking. “Gordo, I will do everything in my power to return to you, or to have you with us. But I cannot ignore what my position asks of me. I must do what I have to. There are people depending on me to—”

  “And what about me?” I asked, wiping my eyes. “Don’t I matter at all?”

  He stood swiftly. He moved around his desk, but I took a step back. He said, “Gordo, you—” and I said, “Don’t touch me, please don’t touch me, I want to hurt you and I don’t know if I can control it, so please don’t touch me.”

  He didn’t.

  “You’ll see,” he begged. “I promise it won’t be long. Soon we’ll come home to you, or you’ll come with us. You will always be our witch, Gordo. You will always be my pack.”

  He reached for me again.

  I let him.

  He hugged me close, his nose buried in my hair.

  My arms stayed at my sides.

  IT TOOK two weeks.

  Two weeks to pack up the house at the end of the lane.

  Two weeks for me to move into Marty’s little house with sunflowers that grew wild and unkempt in the back.

  Two weeks for a FOR RENT sign to go up at the empty blue house that we hadn’t used since our pack had been taken from us.

  Elizabeth kissed me on the morning they left, telling me she’d call me every day.

  Carter cried, unsure of what was happening.

  I pressed my cheek against Kelly’s and he blinked at me, hand in my hair.

  Thomas stood before me, hands on my shoulders, asking me if I could just say something, anything to him. But I hadn’t spoken to him since that day in his office, so I said nothing.

  Mark was the last. Because of course he was.

  He hugged me.

  He made promises I didn’t believe he could keep.

  He had made his choice.

  He said, “Gordo.”

  He said, “Please.”

  He said, “I love you, I need you, I can’t do this without you.”

  He said, “I left something for you. Okay? And I know we said we were going to wait, but I need you to see it. I need you to know I will keep my promises. For you. Always for you. Because nothing will stop me from coming back for you. I promise, okay? I promise you, Gordo.”

  He kissed my forehead.

  And then he was gone.

  I watched as they drove away.

  Marty came, eventually. He put his hand on my shoulder, fingers digging in. “I don’t expect to understand what’s going on. But you always have a home with me, kid.”

  So I said, “I’m a witch. The Bennetts are werewolves. And they chose others over me.”

  LATER, AFTER Marty had drunk himself into a hysterical stupor and finally passed out, I went to my new room in his house. Mark and Thomas had unpacked the boxes, trying to set it up just the way I’d had it in the Bennett house.

  It wasn’t the same.

  A small box had been left on the pillow, wrapped with a red ribbon.

  Inside was a stone wolf.

  I wanted to shatter it into pieces.

  Instead I touched it with the tip of my finger and began to wait for my heart to finish breaking.

  THE FOURTH thing that happened during my fifteenth year barely registered because it seemed so inconsequential.

  “The house,” Marty said, sitting back in a ratty lawn chair in the back of the garage, cigarette smoke curling up around his head, bad heart be damned. “The one for rent. Next to where you used to live.”

  “What about it?” I asked, head tilted back toward the sun.

  “Someone rented it out, so I hear.”

  It didn’t matter. I was still buried under waves of anger. “Yeah?” I said, because that was what normal people did.

  “A family. Mom. Dad. They’ve got a little kid too. Saw them out and about. Seem like the nice enough sort. Kid’s quiet. Got these big eyes. Always staring. The guy asked about work. Said I didn’t have any openings right now, but we’d see.”

  “Bill’s getting on. Might be time for him to retire.”

  Marty snorted. “Yeah. You tell him that and let me know what happens.”

  I opened my eyes, blinking against the sunlight.

  “Just thought you should know,” Marty said, blowing out smoke. “In case you need to—I don’t know.�
�� He glanced over his shoulder back into the garage. Loud music was playing. The guys were laughing. Marty leaned forward, dropping his voice. “In case you need to check them out. In case they’re… werewolves. Or whatever.”

  “They’re not.”

  “How do you know?”

  “I’d know.”

  He stared at me for a beat before shaking his head. “I’m never gonna understand how that shit works. Just… I don’t know. They didn’t give me any weird vibes. So I don’t think they’re anything but down on their luck. Cute kid, though. Little slow, I think. But cute. Name’s Ox, if you can believe that. Poor bastard won’t stand a chance.”

  Whatever. It didn’t matter. “Yeah, Marty. Sure.”

  He sighed as he stubbed his cigarette out on the bottom of his boot before dropping it into the half-filled coffee can. He stood, knees popping. He ran a hand over my head. “Couple more minutes. Then get back to work.” He went back inside the garage.

  He left his pack of smokes out.

  I snagged one, struck a match, and held the fire to the tip.

  I inhaled.

  It burned.

  But it was enough.

  I barely even coughed.

  green creek/please just wait

  JOE SPOKE for the first time in weeks.

  He said, “It’s time to go home.”

  MARK CAME back for the first time six months after they left.

  He said, “Hey, Gordo. Hi. Hello.”

  I slammed the door in his face.

  He waited outside my window until I finally let him in.

  WE POINTED the SUV toward Green Creek.

  Kelly said, “What if they don’t want us to come back?”

  Carter hugged him close.

  RICO SAID, “We’re going out and getting drunk. I’m tired of being sixteen years old and never having gotten intoxicated. It’s like I’m doing nothing with my life. There’s a party, and we’re going.”

  Tanner said, “My dad will kill me if we get caught.”

  Chris said, “I gotta watch Jessie. Mom’s gotta work late.”