Falling Into Lust

by Selene Chardou

  A beautiful man walked over beside me and lit a Marlboro before he blew the smoke out into the wind. He was taller than me by more than half a foot with a beautiful lean and gorgeous tanned body. He possessed shoulder-length brown hair with natural highlights and the most gorgeous aquamarine eyes I’d ever come across. I was standing next to the one and only Kasper Gillian.

  The only reason why I knew what he looked like was because I liked Scarlet Fever’s music and he’d also grown up in the same social circles as me but once he’d found international success, he traded in his pedigree and breeding for street cred.

  “So, you’re the birthday girl?” he teased before he turned toward me with a Northern East Coast accent he had not managed to fully lose.

  “Guilty as charged,” I responded back before our eyes met and for the first time, I felt the heat and electricity between us.

  It was an addictive and seductive power that seemed to hold me in a death grip, and I felt like a magnet being pulled towards him and his energy. I couldn’t explain why I had such a connection to a guy I didn’t even know all that well but there it was: insta-lust in all its perfection and miserable glory.

  “You’re beautiful and I can see why you have been avoiding me.” Kasper dragged from his cigarette again. “I seem to have a certain…effect on women.”

  I laughed out loud because as clever as he was, he certainly had never met a woman like me. “Listen, I don’t just cream my panties because I meet a rock star.” I dragged on my cigarette before I flicked it into the ocean. “Sorry, not my style.”

  He inched closer and I could smell his intoxicating cologne with hints of cypress, absinthe, sage and violet. I would recognize Love & Luck by Ed Hardy in a heartbeat so although not highly original, at least he smelled good enough to devour. “I figured as much when you weren’t seated in my lap within five minutes of this ‘meet and greet’. In fact, I thought you acted a bit rude for not introducing yourself.”

  “Actually, I did meet Will and Grant but I wasn’t about to approach you and Jaden. You two are way too volatile and there were too many people surrounding you.”

  “Call me, Kaz,” he whispered.

  “It’s Syd for me but my real name is Sydney.”

  “Yes, I know. About your real name I mean. You don’t receive a check we did and forget the guest of honor’s name. That would just be plain uncouth.”

  I giggled and realized I’d had way too much to drink. I had no intention of falling in this man’s bed tonight. Perhaps on my birthday he would get lucky but the chase was something I enjoyed way too much to give up my goodies so easily.

  Too much perhaps for this arrogant rock star who was used to women throwing their panties at him on stage.

  “Oh, wow…the man remembers all the big words from our formal social upbringing. Uncouth, huh? Why not just say ‘rude’ or ‘not very professional’?”

  “Yeah, you not making the time to say hello is that too.” He looked out towards the water and sighed. “I can see you are going to be a tough nut to crack. Your grandfather said we were one of your favorite groups but you sure aren’t acting like it.”

  I wore a very revealing scarlet dress courtesy of Christian Dior and a pair of matching Yves Saint Laurent Tribute sandals. “And what should a proper reaction be if you don’t mind my asking?”

  “I don’t know…I’m pretty toasted tonight after all the free and very expensive champagne. What do you think?”

  I smiled slyly before I hitched my hands under my dress while keeping it in place and pulling down a matching lace thong. Slowly, I undid them from around my ankles without slipping off my shoes and handed them to him.

  “Is that a fitting enough tribute because that is as close as you’re ever going to get to my pussy tonight, lover boy.”

  He grabbed them and sniffed the seat. They were literally soaking wet with my juices and for some reason I found this to be a major turn-on.

  “You smell fresh and sweet, like strawberries on a hot summer day.”

  I smiled again at him. “Thanks for coming out all this way to meet with me. I look forward to the concert tomorrow night on my birthday. Goodnight, Kaz.”

  His aquamarine eyes stared into mine before he replied, “Goodnight, Sydney.”

  I walked away and felt like I’d won a small victory. After all, I had managed to get the lead singer of Scarlet Fever highly intrigued with me yet I had done nothing at all to degrade myself. Yes, the scarlet thong had been La Perla and not exactly cheap but it wasn’t something I would miss either. I had dozens of pairs of the exact same thong I’d just given to Kaz thoughtlessly.

  Chapter Three

  Happy Birthday To Me

  “So, what happened to you last night?”

  I nursed a massive hangover from too much alcohol and not enough sleep as Laurel’s voice invaded my psyché.

  “I was tired and decided to retire early. Today is my birthday, after all.”

  She smiled before she embraced me and kissed my cheek. “Happy birthday, honey…do you feel old yet?”

  My mouth twisted into a downturn. “I’m not old, I’m only twenty-three. Jeez, give me some credit already.”

  “Well, it didn’t stop the seduction scene that happened between you and Kaz. You do realize everyone knows about the panty incident last night? He shared it with his bandmates and those kind of incidents take on a life of their own. Do you know about the rumors floating about between you two? One story was you gave him a blow job and then handed him your panties as a way of owning him,” Laurel explained as she handed me a cup of coffee and sat next to me.

  “Please don’t tell me you believe that bullshit. Why would I give a man my panties after giving him a taste of my oral skills? That makes no sense.”

  “Especially since everyone knows you are the biggest tease of the year and still a virgin!” Laurel exclaimed in a snarky tone before she became serious again. “Tell me, you aren’t thinking of…you know giving it up to a rocker, are you?”

  “Maybe,” I mused before I drank my coffee. “I’m officially twenty-three, Laurel. Being a virgin at eighteen is cute—at twenty-three, I’m practically towing the line of major freak status here. Better to just get it over with then keep playing with guys by giving them blow jobs. I’m ready for the real thing.”

  “You’ve waited this long. Why not let it be with someone you really care about, you know? Kaz is a stranger to you and furthermore, he’s a rock star. He’s got a kid and an ex-wife. Do you really want to deal with all that bullshit even if something were to happen between you two? It seems like a lot of crap to put up with just to say you landed a rock god.”

  “Good grief, Laurel, I just want one night with the guy—I don’t want to freakin’ marry him. And I want to get rid of my frigid status. I keep this up and I’ll be another Taylor Swift or something and everyone will think I am some sort of rich tease who is actually afraid to have sex.”

  “I don’t know about frigid…but you are a tease, Sydney.”

  It was hard to describe to any of my friends but my bravado was false and extremely exaggerated. I was absolutely terrified of having sex with a man. I could come off like a wanton sex kitten and do “everything but” however, so far, I had yet to “close escrow”. It was pretty embarrassing especially in the society circles that my friends and I all socialized freely. I was the only virgin because I was too scared of the pain that came with having sex.

  I wasn’t talking about physical because I’d experienced more than enough of that. My real father had never “claimed” me because he was a politician with a beautiful perfect wife and two handsome sons who would eventually take over for him. As opposed to my friends…well, they didn’t need to know the truth. My biological father had inordinately scarred me for life simply because any rejection by a man emotionally was so palpable and brought on such horrific anxiety attacks, I’d decided to take the easy way out. I simply did not have sexual intercourse or go all the way.

&nbs
p; I certainly was no saint and you would never ever hear me claim to be one. I had done my fair share of drugs and not only that, I’d had men go down on me and had gone down on men but vaginal sex alluded me and with good reason. I didn’t want the emotional nor the physical ties that went along with it and I was determined the first man who made love to me would make me remember the incident for the rest of my life. Not because it would be awful but simply because he would be simply unforgettable.

  “I don’t know what I plan to do tonight, Laurel.” I finished my coffee and set the mug on the art deco coffee table. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I could use a few more hours of sleep so I can try to rid myself of a monster hangover that won’t fucking quit.”

  My best friend stood and pursed her lips in exasperation. “Fine. But if you need me, you know where to find me!”

  “Yes, I do,” I replied to myself before I watched her leave and contemplated what our plans were for my special day.

  For a few minutes, I sat up in bed before I realized it was time to get the show on the road. Who was I kidding? I was dying to see Kaz again after my panty stunt the night before. He knew I was a wild one, which was good, but he also knew I wasn’t easy either, which was better in my book.

  I didn’t mind giving up my virginity to him, after all, how many people could say their first time being physically intimate and going all the way with another human being was with a rock star? Not many except perhaps a handful of super groupies and whether they were to be believed or not was a whole other question people rarely asked themselves.

  I stretched and got out of bed before there was a knock on my door and I yelled out, “What is it, Laurel?”

  The door opened and I gasped as Faith walked in looking every bit the fashion plate she’d always been. I considered myself a pretty decent dresser but Faith blew us all away with her carefully prepared outfits and like Victoria “Posh” Beckham, she was never spotted without a pair of sky-high heels regardless what she decided to wear. The woman wouldn’t know what to do with a pair of Nike’s or ballet flats if you gave them to her.

  Her long, naturally dark auburn hair was dyed flaxen blonde and her gray-green eyes sparkled seductively.

  I ran over and embraced her without a word. We clung to one another and all I could do was inhale the intoxicating scent of her expensive perfume she had designed specifically for her unique body chemistry in an exclusive Parisian perfume boutique. A mixture of vanilla, freesia, and cinnamon, it was a scent that fit her alone and she left a lingering whiff of her signature perfume where ever she ventured.

  We separated and I held her at arms length. “I thought you said it would be impossible for you to make it?”

  “Well, I lied. I just didn’t want to face any demons from my past and it was just easier to make you think I couldn’t come because I had made some prior commitment but…that wasn’t true and I wouldn’t have been able to live with myself if I missed your birthday,” she explained as she touched my face with her right, perfectly manicured hand.

  I allowed my arms to fall to their side and looked down at the simple cami top and women’s boxer shorts I still wore which I’d slept in. I still needed to take a shower and get dressed.

  “How did you get on the yacht? I didn’t think we’d reached Nassau yet.”

  Faith stared at me with a look of peculiarity in her eyes. “Actually, the yacht has been docked since early this morning. I took a private plane from Miami and your grandfather greeted me when I arrived.”

  I began to walk around and straighten up my suite since my best friend was such a neat freak. “Is that where you’re living now? In Miami?”

  “Nope. I’m in L.A. and I absolutely love living out there. All the great clubs, the famous men…and the shopping—I’m in absolute shopping heaven. It’s pretty lonely because I miss you and Laurel but that’s what private planes are for. I can pop in to see you two any time I want to so it’s not that bad.” Faith walked around the suite with her hands on her slender hips before she faced me again. “So where are the members of Scarlet Fever?”

  “Around if they haven’t disembarked. They aren’t chained to the boat, you know, and they are probably buried in a bar enjoying way too many alcoholic concoctions for this early in the morning.”

  “Laurel, you and I should hang out. I will let you get dressed and meet you in about thirty minutes, okay? Up on the deck so you won’t miss me.”

  I smiled before I responded, “Now, that, my dear, won’t be hard.”

  Chapter Four

  Gotta Have Faith

  After a quick shower, I slipped on a cute yet expensive Valentino lace and mesh sleeveless floral dress which went perfect with my blonde hair in a messy chignon and a comfortable pair of Christian Louboutin cream espadrilles which happened to not be sky high.

  Laurel, on the other hand opted for low-key, Dolce & Gabbana multicolor stripe printed dress with spaghetti-straps and paired it with black, three-inch Chanel sandals. Faith, meanwhile went all out with a Victoria Beckham black organza sleeveless dress with a high necked collar and a floral design that could barely be seen because it was black. The only color she decided to wear were lime green accessories including sky-high Yves Saint Laurent Tribute high-heeled sandals and a matching clutch.

  We all looked classically wealthy and it was easy to tell we did not belong to one of the Sandals tours that frequented this beautiful stretch of land. If I was honest, we kind of appeared to be younger versions of the women from Sex & the City minus Samantha since we were all the same age.

  Out of all the islands in The Bahamas, Nassau was one of my favorites and we quickly found the hole in the wall we always visited when we came to the island and started indulging in our favorite tropical alcoholic beverages.

  We each ordered a round for each other of our favorite drinks after we had toasted to my birthday with two hundred proof shots of rum.

  As we held up our shot glasses, Faith said, “Okay, here is to having a fabulous birthday that rocks and kicks major ass. If anyone deserves happiness and a wonderful time, it is you. Time for you to get that stick out of your ass and have someone break that hymen of yours before you end up a twenty-five year old virgin.”

  Laurel laughed out loud before she continued with, “And let’s hope it is a really hot guy who breaks it because I gave mine to Tim our senior year in high school and what a complete and total waste of time that relationship happened to be. So, have a wonderful and very exciting birthday!”

  “Definitely! Happy birthday and mazel tov!” Faith exclaimed.

  “Girl, your lily-white, Scots-Irish ass ain’t Jewish!” Laurel exclaimed before we all broke into girlish laughter.

  “True but my step-father is so I can borrow the saying any time I want!” Faith retorted smartly.

  “Thank you, sweeties! I love you both and here’s to me having a very cool birthday.”

  We all downed our shots before Laurel ordered a round of mojitos.

  “Jeez, the calories! This means extra hours in the gym next week.”

  I glared at Faith. “You look absolutely fab, babe. What the hell is this about extra hours at the gym? Have you gone completely L.A. on us?”

  “No. I do the gym only three times per week but I also do a kick boxing class which is great for keeping me in shape and self-defense.”

  “Oh, don’t look now but we have company,” Laurel interrupted as she swigged from her mojito.

  My eyes grew big as I saw Kaz and Co. head our way. They all looked like they’d had too much to drink but since when had that ever stopped men from doing what they did?

  Faith’s gray-green eyes opened to the size of large saucers. “Shit! What are they doing here? This is a huge island and not many people know about this place unless they are intimately familiar with Nassau.”

  “Maybe they are.” Laurel perked up and checked her reflection in her compact mirror once more.

  “You look fine, babe.”

  “I’ll be rig
ht back,” Faith exclaimed and before either Laurel or I could stop her, she ran away from the bar.

  “What the fuck?” Jaden looked off in Faith’s direction. “Was that Faith Maguire?”

  Laurel’s pretty hazel-green eyes narrowed. “How do you know Faith?”

  “It’s nothing…never mind.” He smiled at Laurel and displayed a set of gorgeous white teeth. “How are you doin’? You look good enough to eat.”

  My best friend recovered quite quickly and began to flirt with the stunning guitarist but my mind was on the gentle, warm hand wrapped around my upper left arm which belonged to Kaz.

  “Why don’t you walk with me?” It came out as a question but it was definitely more of a statement and before I knew it, I stood and followed him as we began to stroll casually along a paved walkway.

  “What’s this all about?” I wondered out loud.

  I tried to sound casual but I just couldn’t pull it off. There was something about this man in particular that always had me on edge. Yes, he was a rock star but it was more than that. I was positive I would feel the same way about him whether he was a mechanic or belonged to a biker gang. The connection between us, the pull just didn’t stop because I was practically sober.

  Men had never been an enigma to me despite my father never being a real parental figure in my life. I knew how to work them and play them like marionettes—otherwise, I would have fallen for some guy’s bullshit and lost my virginity years before that point in my life.

  Kaz was special though. He seemed to know it and he treated me like I was special, which was a bit rich coming from someone who liked to bang groupies and run. Yes, I liked to know everything about a potential “male” in my life and his reputation preceded him. His blue-green eyes met mine and I smiled in return as we continued to walk in silence.