Waiting For Ethan

by Diane Barnes

  Luci beeps and beckons for me to move it. “I’ll call you when we get back from lunch,” I say to Cooper.

  “Seriously, where are you going?”

  “Umm, I think Last Chance.”

  “Would you mind bringing me back a turkey club with sweet potato fries?” He unzips his briefcase and reaches inside it for his wallet. “Ask them to make the bacon extra crispy.” Luci beeps again.

  “I got it.” I walk away before Cooper pulls out his money. When I get to Luci’s car, I sneak a glance back at him. He’s standing in the spot I left him looking at me. I wave, and he waves back.

  When I slide into the car, Luci turns the radio off. “What was so funny?”

  I shrug. “I guess your name.”

  She turns sideways. “Even if the two of you don’t realize it, there’s something going on between you.”

  “He has a girlfriend,” I say.

  “Interesting that you didn’t say you have a boyfriend.” She backs out of the parking space and heads for the row Cooper is now walking down. “He has a nice ass,” she says. She beeps and blows him a kiss while I check out his butt. She’s right.

  Luci told the waitress she did not want fries with her chicken sandwich so now she’s helping herself to mine. She picks up the ketchup, and I have to knock her arm away from my plate.

  “I never heard of someone not liking ketchup before,” she says.

  She squirts some onto her plate and moves a handful of fries from my dish to hers. “So, what did Ethan say to the couple at the restaurant that got you so mad?”

  I’ve already told her exactly what he said, but she was distracted by a middle-aged and elderly woman being seated at the next table. The older woman was hunched over the walker she was using, and the younger woman kept asking, “Mom, are you all right?” When the older woman finally made it to her chair she said, “I’m ninety-two years old. I’m as good as I can be.”

  “God, don’t let me live to be ninety,” Luci whispered.

  “Why?” I asked. “That woman is fine. She’s enjoying a lunch out with her daughter.”

  Luci glared at me and changed the subject back to Ethan. So now I repeat that the couple asked how long we’d been married and he answered seventeen years.

  “Seventeen years! How old is he?”

  “He’s thirty-seven.”

  Luci counts on her fingers.

  “Twenty,” I say before she figures it out. “He got married when he was twenty.”

  “That’s nuts.” She takes the remaining fries from my plate.

  “I don’t know, after seeing the picture of Leah and then . . .”

  “Leah, the ex-wife.” Luci is talking with her mouth open, and I can see the red mush from the mixture of french fries and ketchup. “You didn’t tell me you saw a picture of her. Where was it? I hope it wasn’t on his nightstand because that would be bad. Really bad.”

  I stir the ice in my cup with my straw. “It was in a stack of pictures in the living room. His roommate showed it to me.” The waitress stops by our table to ask if we’d like anything else. I order Cooper’s turkey club to go.

  “Who’s that for?” Luci asks as the waitress walks away. Then she corrects herself before I can. “For whom is that?”

  “Cooper.”

  She raises her eyebrows.

  “Leah looks a lot like me.”

  “Looks like you how?”

  “If you looked at her picture quickly, you’d think it was me.”

  Luci leans back in her chair. “That’s creepy.”

  I nod and look down.

  “Gina, Ethan was married for seventeen years. He isn’t even divorced yet. He has no business dating. Believe me when I tell you he has no idea what he’s doing right now.”

  I pull my glass closer and take a long pull on my straw. “Why did you and Kip get divorced?”

  Luci studies me for a moment without saying anything. She looks over at the old woman and her daughter and then slowly turns back to me. “Kip wasn’t sure if he wanted kids, and we agreed to wait another year or so before making a final decision.” She picks up her napkin from her lap and wipes her mouth. “I got scared my window of opportunity was closing so I went off the pill without telling him. I got pregnant a lot faster than I thought I would. I really thought he’d be excited, but when I told him, he flipped out.”

  “What? When were you pregnant?”

  She shakes her head. “I miscarried the day after I told him. How’s that for bad timing?”

  “Luci, I’m so sorry. I had no idea.” I am a failure as a friend. How could I not notice that something so monumental was going on?

  She swipes the area under her eye with her index finger. “He said he could never trust me again, and that was that.”

  The waitress comes with Cooper’s meal and the bill. I hand her my credit card.

  “It took me a long time to get over my divorce, Gina. Hell, I’m not even sure I’m over it now, and I wasn’t married half as long as Ethan.” She stands and walks off toward the restrooms. She returns a few minutes later as I’m signing the receipt. “I hope you’re going to make Cooper pay for his meal,” she says. “He makes at least double, probably triple what we do.”

  Cooper’s door is shut when I get to his office so I knock and peek through the long window next to it. He motions for me to come in and stands as I enter.

  “How much do I owe you?” he asks, reaching for the briefcase on the corner of his desk.

  “My treat.”

  He has already pulled out his wallet. “Well, thank you.” He swallows hard and slides the wallet back into his briefcase. “I’ll take you out sometime.”

  “It’s not necessary.”

  He squeezes his hands together. “Right.”

  “What was it that you wanted to talk to me about?”

  He sits and points to the guest chair. “We haven’t come up with any recommendations for speeding up editing, and I’m starting to hear about it.”

  “You’ve cancelled our last three meetings.” It comes out sounding defensive.

  “I know it’s my fault.” The amount of eye contact he is suddenly making with me is really uncomfortable. I look down. “The problem is, I’m usually straight out during the day.” He pauses to clear his throat. “Do you have any time after work one night?”

  The last thing I want to do is work overtime, but this is Mr. TechVisions I’m talking to. He’d never understand that. “I guess so.”

  Cooper laughs. “Don’t sound so enthusiastic.”

  I shrug.

  “How about tomorrow night?”

  “I guess we should get it over with.”

  He laughs again. “I’ll be at a client site, but I’ll call you to figure out where to meet. It will be fun.” I stare blankly at him. “You’ll see.”

  When I get home from work, Ethan’s Jeep is parked in my space. I pull in behind him and brace myself for an argument. I slowly get out of my car. I look inside his vehicle and see that it’s empty. I walk around to the back of the house to get to my apartment, and he’s sitting on the wooden staircase. He’s looking down at a spot on his jeans; one hand is tucked inside the pocket of his brown leather jacket and the other clutches a single red rose. My heart softens just a little. He must hear my shoes clicking on the flagstone walkway because he looks up. Our eyes meet. He smiles, stands, and descends the stairway to meet me at the bottom. He doesn’t say anything. He just wraps his arms around me and nestles his head onto my shoulder. “I’m sorry, Gina,” he whispers after several seconds. “I don’t want to work things out with Leah. I want to make things work with you, and I never should have told that couple I was married.” I hold him just as tightly, needing to believe him and wishing Ajee had warned me it would be this hard. “Sometimes I’m going to say and do stupid things,” he continues, “but that doesn’t mean that I don’t love you.”

  I stiffen and pull away from him. “What did you just say?”

  He hands me the ro
se, puts his hands on my shoulders, and looks directly in my eyes. “I love you.”

  I’ve been fantasizing about a man named Ethan saying those words to me ever since Ajee made her prediction. In all my fantasies, I always say, “I love you more.” Here in the actual moment, though, I can’t bring myself to say those words because they wouldn’t be true, not yet anyway. Instead, I say nothing and just stand there grinning like a fool.

  It doesn’t surprise me at all that the morning after Ethan tells me he loves me, I hear from Neesha again. It’s another sign from Ajee indicating her third predictions are about to come true.

  Hello old friend!

  I’ve scheduled my trip to Westham. I’ll be there next Wednesday, April 17. I want to let you know that I sent Ajee’s ashes ahead to your address. I don’t trust the airlines with them. Thank you for suggesting I stay with you during my visit. I hope you meant it, because I’m going to take you up on it. It will give us more time to catch up.

  Can’t wait to see you,

  Neesha

  Chapter 22

  Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. What have I gotten myself into? Cooper Allen is standing on my landing with an overnight bag. What exactly does he think is going to happen on this work date? It’s not even like I’m cooking for him. We’re walking to Salvatore’s to brainstorm ways to speed up the editing process. On second thought, maybe this will take all night, or several nights.

  I push open the screen door. He steps inside and immediately loosens his tie. “I’ve got to get out of this monkey suit,” he groans. “Where can I change?”

  He’s already removed his suit jacket, and now he’s unbuttoning his shirt. I spy his dark chest hair. Damn, it’s incredibly sexy. “Not here!” I point to the bathroom. He rushes by me like he has Montezuma’s revenge.

  I pace my kitchen floor trying hard not to think of him stripping down in my bathroom. A few minutes later he reappears wearing wind pants, a Dartmouth College hooded sweatshirt, and sneakers. His transformation from uptight executive to frat boy is more pronounced than Clark Kent’s change into Superman. There’s a masculine ruggedness about him when he’s dressed like this. I can’t stop staring. “What?” he says.

  My mouth gapes open. Clearly I can’t tell him what I’m thinking, so instead I say, “I feel overdressed now. I should change.” I’m still wearing the same outfit I wore to work: a black skirt that rests just above my knees, a red V-neck sweater, and high black boots.

  “Don’t change. You look great.” His voice has the same authoritative tone it does at work, but I notice his ear tips are bright red.

  “Luci picked out this outfit,” I blurt out. Almost thirty-seven years old, and I still haven’t learned how to accept a compliment. Good Lord.

  Cooper takes a few steps into the living room and slowly rotates his head as his eyes scan my apartment. “This isn’t how I imagined your place.” He shoves his hands into the pockets of his wind pants.

  My stomach muscles contract. Cooper has spent time imagining my place? “What did you think it would be like?”

  He squints. I imagine he’s trying to bring up an image in his head. “I figured you’d be in the suburbs, a town house or a condo.” He eyes my bare white walls and tan leather couch. “Bright colors, lots of artwork. Big throw pillows. Just a lot more homey.”

  I suddenly see my sterile living space through his eyes. I’m embarrassed. I never made an effort to decorate the place because from the time I moved in more than a decade ago, I always believed I was just days away from meeting Ethan and moving into his spacious domicile. It never occurred to me that Ethan would be homeless, relying on the kindness of an old friend for a place to sleep each night.

  “Where do you live?” I ask.

  “Westham.”

  “No, you don’t.” I feel the muscles in my stomach squeeze tighter.

  “It’s actually a nice town,” he says defensively.

  “I grew up there. My parents still live there.”

  “You’re kidding. What street?”

  “Towering Heights Lane.”

  He lifts his hand mimicking an airplane taking off. “When I’m feeling ambitious, it’s on my jogging route. I’m on Birmingham Circle.”

  My face flushes. “That’s where my first boyfriend lived. Two Birmingham Circle. He broke up with me days before the prom because I wouldn’t sleep with him.” Oh. My. God. I can’t believe I just told Cooper Allen I wouldn’t put out in high school.

  Cooper looks down at the floor, and then his eyes float back to mine. “He sounds like a jerk.” There’s a beat of silence, but then he continues, “I asked Mary Jane Lucas to my prom. She said she wanted to go with someone taller so I didn’t go.” He shrugs.

  As Cooper and I approach Salvatore’s, two women rush by and enter the restaurant. Although we are right behind them, they don’t bother to hold open the door, and it slams on Cooper’s face. Clayton is full of rude people just like them.

  Inside, three or four people wait at the takeout counter, but only a handful of booths are occupied. Sal Senior leads the two rude women to a table next to a crying baby and then comes back to seat us. “Gina!” He takes both my hands in his and kisses me on each cheek. When he pulls away, he inches closer to Cooper. “Who is this?”

  “This is my friend Cooper.” The two men shake hands while I realize I have elevated Cooper from coworker to friend.

  “Cooper?” Sal mutters. “Is that your first or last name?” He doesn’t wait for an answer. “She’s our favorite customer. You better treat her right.”

  I expect Cooper to tell Sal that we’re just colleagues, here to finish a project. Instead, he straightens himself and answers solemnly, “Of course, sir.”

  Sal reaches down to pat him on the shoulder and leads us to a quiet booth in the back. As we pass the table with the two women who rushed in front of us, Cooper whispers, “Karma’s a bitch.” They are glaring at the baby in the high chair, who is screaming even louder now.

  Sal leaves us with menus and makes his way to the noisy infant. He leans down and says something to the mother, who smiles and nods in response. Next thing I know, Sal has removed the baby from the high chair and is holding him over his shoulder, pacing back and forth. The wailing stops.

  Watching Sal with the baby makes me miss my parents. I imagine my dad trying to get an infant to stop screaming and then immediately replace the mental image of my dad with my mother. I feel my heart squeeze. Please let Ajee be right about Ethan so Mom and Dad can be grandparents.

  “What’s good?” Cooper asks. I turn my attention to him. He’s watching me over his menu.

  “All I ever get is pizza, but I’m sure everything is delicious.”

  “I love Italian food,” he says.

  “You should stop by my parents’ sometime,” I say. “My mom would love to cook for you.”

  “Next time I run up that hill,” Cooper says.

  For some reason, I can picture it: Cooper at the kitchen table with me and my parents. He’s sitting in the chair we used to refer to as Neesha’s. “What’s your handicap?” my dad asks while my mother scoops more manicotti onto his plate. “Mangia! Mangia!” she says.

  Sal has returned to our table. “Ready to order?”

  “I need another minute,” Cooper answers. “In the meantime, we’ll take a bottle of Chianti.”

  Alcohol? Now I really feel like we’re on a date. “We have lots of work to do. We shouldn’t drink.”

  “We need to get creative.” Cooper shrugs. “I thought it might help.”

  A few minutes later, Tory brings the wine to our table. His black T-shirt shows off his shiny giant biceps. Wait, why are his muscles shiny? Did he lube up before coming to work?

  “So this is why you won’t go out with me?” He looks Cooper up and down while maneuvering the corkscrew. Cooper’s studying me with that squinty look of his. Probably waiting for me to correct Tory. “When you get tired of him, you let me know.” Tory winks and fills our wineglasses w
ithout giving either of us a taste first.

  After Tory leaves, Cooper continues to stare at me. I’ve never met someone so comfortable making so much eye contact without saying a word. He picks up his wine. “Cheers,” he finally says.

  I tap mine against his and take a large sip. Cooper continues to stare. I put my wine down and open my menu again. Cooper drops his head to his menu, as well.

  Sal meanders to our table. “What’s it gonna be?” He’s looking at me.

  Cooper answers, “Gina will have a pizza with peppers.” He stops. “Right?” I stare at him and nod.

  “Big surprise,” Sal says.

  “I’ll have the broccoli, chicken, and ziti,” Cooper finishes. Sal raises an eyebrow at me. Maybe he’s thinking real men don’t eat that. That’s what I’m thinking, anyway. “On second thought,” Cooper says, “I’ll have the chicken parm.”

  “Much better,” Sal says while I nod in agreement.

  “So I’m that predictable?” I ask after Sal leaves.

  “I analyzed the situation,” Cooper explains. “First, I looked at the market indicators, which include your earlier admission that you always get pizza here and the fact that the first time we ate together, you asked for peppers. Based on those market indicators, I confidently forecast what I thought would be the result, a pizza with peppers.” He grins.

  “You really are a nerd.” I smile as I say it.

  Cooper reaches for the wine bottle and fills my glass almost to the top. He doesn’t pour more for himself. Is he trying to get me drunk? “Tell me about growing up in Westham,” Cooper says. “Sisters? Brothers?”

  Definitely a first date question. I take a large sip of wine before answering. I tell him all about Ajee and her fortune-telling business and how Neesha and I used to spy. I don’t mention that Ajee predicted I would marry a man named Ethan. “Neesha’s coming next week to spread Ajee’s remains at her old home. She sent the ashes ahead,” I say. “They should arrive any day.” I take another huge sip of wine. “I’m sort of creeped out by the idea.”