Eminent Love

by Leddy Harper

  She stole my breath away.

  I strode across the room to the woman who owned my heart—every part of me. The warmth of her bare skin on mine alleviated the chill in the air and sent a rolling fire through my body. She ran her palms along my chest, over my shoulders, and into the hair on the back of my head.

  “If this is too weird for you—being in your parents’ house—we can wait until we return to your apartment. I’m ready, and there is no expiration date on my decision. I told you I wanted to wait for the right time. I didn’t mean it had to be the right date or the right location…just right. So whether it be here or two nights from now in your bed, I don’t care. Because I’m absolutely in love with you and can’t fathom not sharing every part of me with you. I have no doubts, Creed.”

  Chapter Nine

  Now

  My body felt heavy, but my eyes had popped open, ready to move on with my trip. I checked the time, noting I’d only been out for four hours. I needed more rest, but I couldn’t seem to fall back asleep.

  The shower helped. My mind had been, stimulated with excitement, although my body hadn’t quite caught up. Not only did the hot water wake me up, but it gave me the chance to relieve the sexual tension my dream of Layne had caused. It only took a few minutes, a few strokes of my hand, to empty myself once I closed my eyes and imagined the way she looked that night.

  So peaceful.

  So angelic.

  That one memory had come to me often in my sleep, and had been the reason for waking up many mornings with aching balls and a throbbing dick. It was just more intense this morning because I knew, somewhere deep in my subconscious mind, I was on my way to see her. And it made it more real than any other time before.

  The entire routine of showering, brushing my teeth, and changing my clothes took me less than thirty minutes, and I was out the door.

  The clerk at the desk seemed surprised when I stopped in to check out. It was barely midnight and I hadn’t gotten there until after six. It made me wonder how many people stopped in to sleep for only a few hours before leaving again. It may have been a small town, but from what I saw in the few short miles off the interstate, it appeared to be a pretty place to visit.

  As I made my way out, I thought about bringing Layne here sometime.

  In the parking lot, I noticed a couple getting out of their car. For whatever reason, they caught my attention and I couldn’t turn away. Their license plate showed they were from Florida, and by the way they touched and regarded each other, they appeared to be newlyweds. I imagined they, too, were on a long road trip and had pulled over to sleep for the night.

  I took one last glance at them, wondering if they may have been on their honeymoon, and then I got back in my car. It wasn’t like they were the first couple I’d seen together since Layne left, but it made me think I’d been blind to love without her. The idea of not having her in my life left me incapable of noticing the way a man looked at his significant other, or the way she reached out to hold his hand. And now, with the prospect of Layne’s love filling the void in my chest again, it made it easier to appreciate what others had.

  It made me even more determined to get it again.

  And then the reality of it all came crashing down. I had no idea what I’d find in California. I had no idea how long she’d give me, or how fleeting our moment could be. But I was desperate. I’d take a day, a minute, a second. Even if our time is spent in silence, spent with her hating me, I’d take it. Because at least I could see her one last time. I could capture the image of her in my heart and hold onto it forever.

  I hadn’t done that when she left.

  Then

  I kissed the smooth skin beneath her bellybutton as Layne shivered under me, her legs trembling on either side of me. I wanted to slowly make my way up her body, but she wouldn’t give me the time. She locked her hands on both sides of my head and aggressively pulled me up her body until our lips met.

  She must’ve tasted herself on me, because she took control and licked the seam of my lips. Subtle moans reverberated through her chest as she ran her fingers through my hair, pulling me closer, even though I couldn’t possibly get nearer.

  Her hips tilted. My eager erection met her heat, and I methodically rolled my hips, running my shaft between her folds. Her moans grew slightly louder, but they were quiet enough that the noise from outside would drown her out, even if someone pressed their ear to the bedroom door. Yet I didn’t want to take a chance, so I kept my mouth over hers, swallowing every sound she made as she found release.

  Her breathing turned frantic and her thighs clamped around me. I knew she hovered on the verge of another orgasm. Even though she had grown more comfortable with me back at home, I had never seen her get off before tonight. I never went there with her. She hadn’t ever told me not to, but I hadn’t wanted to take the chance. I never wanted to do anything that might’ve caused her to go further before she was ready. So I’d kept my hands to myself.

  But not tonight.

  Tonight I’d started out strumming her clit like a guitar with my fingers, drawing out her first orgasm. It was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. And once she came down from that high, I’d made my way between her legs with my lips and tongue. The memory was seared into my brain, and I knew I would replay it in my mind every day. And now, with my shaft sliding against her clit and bringing her to the verge, I pulled my lips from hers so I could peer into her eyes as she fell over the edge again.

  She shuddered beneath me and released a breath across my face. A thin gleam of sweat lined her forehead and made her glow. I needed to see her happy and at peace, content and blushing with pleasure, because if we followed through with this, she would more than likely be in pain.

  I held still and stared into her eyes, silently seeking permission, waiting for her to tell me to stop. But she never did. Her gaze met mine, and then she gave me a short, yet confident, nod. A full puff of air passed my lips as I shifted to line myself up with her entrance. I never once glanced away or closed my eyes. I kept my focus on her while I settled in place and eased the crown of my dick inside.

  I stopped and waited for her to exhale, and used the time to garner my own control. Her smooth heat was almost unbearable; she was so tight, I didn’t think I’d be able to fully penetrate her. The heaving in her chest slowed, but the tremors racking her body intensified. My heart ached for her and I wanted to stop, but she carefully undulated her hips and encouraged me to keep going. I moved my hips a little more, gaining another inch or so until her nails dug into my shoulders.

  Her eyes squeezed closed and she sucked in air through gritted teeth. At first, I didn’t think anything of it. But when I pulled away enough to see her entire expression, everything in me turned cold. Discomfort was expected, but she appeared to be in agony. Deep creases accentuated her brow, turning her forehead into valleys of excruciating pain. She clenched her teeth so tightly, the muscles in her jaw flexed wildly. And her face—normally a soft creamy color—had turned fiery red from the way she held her breath.

  “I can’t do this to you,” I whispered against her lips.

  Her fingernails dug in deeper and her eyes flew open. “No. Don’t stop. I want this, Creed. I want you. Please, just get through it. Stay with me.”

  I pressed up on my elbows to square my sight with hers. “I’m not going to just get through it, Layne.” My words were harsh as they seeped past my tight lips. “I want to be with you more than I’ve ever wanted anything else in my life, but I refuse to hurt you. This isn’t the way it should be. It shouldn’t be about getting ‘through it’ as if it were some kind of exam.”

  A tear appeared out of nowhere and slid down the side of her face before disappearing into her hair. “I know…but there’s no way around it. Once we get through this part, once you’re all the way in, it will get better. I’m not asking you to hurry up and finish. I only want you to push past this part, so we can enjoy the rest.”

  I nodded, trusting h
er against my instinct. I inhaled deeply and lowered my lips to hers. “I love you, Yen.”

  “I love you, too, Yang.”

  As soon as she seemed to calm down, I trailed my fingers in feather-like strokes along the side of her body from her shoulder to her hip. Her arms and legs began to quiver, but I was sure it had more to do with the way I touched her than anything else. After a moment of worshiping her with my fingertips, I slowly and carefully pulled my hips back, stopping when only the tip of my erection remained inside her. My mouth crashed to hers at the same time I pushed into her.

  She gasped against my lips and her fingernails bit into my skin, but I didn’t move away from her. I’d passed her resistance and settled my pelvic bone against hers. Flesh to flesh. Heat against heat.

  Her chest pressed against mine with every pant bursting past her lips. I tried to use my hands and mouth to calm her, but nothing seemed to work. I had hurt her, and there was no way to go back and change it. I wanted to make it better. But I couldn’t.

  Suddenly, Layne slid her hands from my shoulder blades to my waist and guided me up and away from her. I thought she wanted me to stop, so I slowly started to ease back. I only managed to pull out a few inches before her grip on me tightened, adding resistance to my movement, and then she tried to encourage me to slide back inside her.

  Back and forth.

  In and out.

  Slow and gentle.

  And as I studied her face, watched her peer at me through shuttered lashes, I realized something. This may have been her first time, but it was mine as well. It was the first time I’d ever made love to someone. I’d always thought the term was ridiculous and for older people especially, but I couldn’t have been more wrong. It was about emotion, a bond, a connection with someone else. It was sex, but it went beyond the shallow depths of gratification.

  It was our first time.

  Every time I sank fully into her and my pelvic bone met hers, she made a sweet purring sound. I wanted to hear it again and again. So as I moved into her, I made sure to grind against the spot that gave her so much pleasure. The more I rubbed against it, the more she moaned, and the tighter she became inside.

  I wouldn’t last.

  I was barely holding on.

  She whimpered when I lifted myself onto my elbow, adding space between our chests, but once the pad of my thumb covered her swollen clit, my name became a moan on her lips. Her eyes closed and her head burrowed deeply into the pillow. It only took a few circles of my thumb and several thrusts of my hips before she exploded around me. Her already tight grip on my dick clamped down even more, strangling me with her core.

  Her jaw slackened around the harsh air escaping her lungs. I waited until she completely released her breath before I gave in. I wanted to be gentle with her, but as my own orgasm took over, my thrusts turned harsh and frenzied. If it’d hurt her, she didn’t once let me know. Instead of flinching or grimacing, she held me tighter until I’d emptied myself and fallen on top of her.

  Her fingertips grazed my spine as we lay together, both trying to control our breathing and rapidly beating hearts. I knew I had to get up. I couldn’t stay on top of her forever, but I didn’t want to leave the cocoon of her warmth. By the time she shifted beneath me, I knew I had to move.

  I kissed the tip of her nose and gently pulled out. “We need to get cleaned up. Stay right here, I’ll be back.” And then I got off the bed, thankful we’d been in this room instead of mine where the bathroom was down the hall.

  My mom had really gone all out when setting this up for Layne. She had lavender scented bath salts next to the tub, and a bottle of lavender bubble bath. I turned on the hot water, assuming it’d help relax Layne, and opted for the salts over the bubbles. My mom had even hung a heavy robe on the back of the door. Pride filled my chest at seeing the care my mother had taken in making my girlfriend feel comfortable. It all came in handy after what we just did—although I’m sure my mom hadn’t anticipated that happening.

  After I flushed the condom, I went back to the room and pulled Layne by the hand from the bed. I led her into the bathroom and turned off the water. She let me help her over the ledge of the tub, and then faced me with an easy grin on her lips. “Aren’t you gonna get in?”

  My mouth opened and shut without anything coming out. Finally, I shook my head and answered her. “I thought you’d want to relax and soak by yourself. You’re probably sore…and stuff.” I wanted to kick myself for how stupid I sounded. This was Layne, the same girl who comforted me time and time again. Eased my stresses and soothed my soul. Yet I fumbled with words and acted like I’d never been around a girl before.

  “Creed,” she called to me in her sweet and gentle tone. “I’m not asking you to have sex with me in the bathtub. I only want to spend more time with you. I can’t very well relax in here if you’re out there.”

  The tightness in my chest evaporated and I was finally able to pull in a full inhalation. I climbed over the ledge and slowly eased into the hot water with Layne’s back against my chest. She settled between my bent legs and rested her head against my shoulder.

  It instantly became my new favorite way to hold her.

  “Have you found a place to live yet?” I asked while running the washcloth over her chest.

  “Not yet. My dad is taking us out sometime this week to look at places.”

  I didn’t speak for long seconds, letting the silence drift over us. I knew what I wanted to say, but I needed a moment before uttering the words. It wasn’t because I was scared or nervous over her reaction—or possible rejection. I needed a minute because I wanted to commit this exact moment to memory. So many things had changed tonight, and I knew more would come soon. I couldn’t wait for what the future would bring, excited about the next steps we’d take together.

  “Layne?”

  She tilted her head back and hummed, her eyes closed and a blissful smile playing at the corners of her lips.

  “What would you think about moving in with me?”

  “I think it’d be really cramped.”

  My shoulders jumped as I released silent laughter. “No, I mean…what if we got our own place?”

  “What about Colin? Where would he go? And Drea wouldn’t want to stay at home.”

  I ran the washcloth over her neck, beneath her chin, and then down between her breasts. “Drea could take my half of the lease…or we could get a place big enough for all four of us.”

  Her eyes popped open and focused on the ceiling. After a few seconds, she sat up and turned in the water until she sat between my legs facing me. “I don’t know if they’re even ready to live with each other. I’m assuming it’s something we would need to talk to them about. But I don’t know how my parents would feel about us living with you guys. They’d be the ones paying our rent, and I worry my dad would say no.”

  I nodded, mostly because there wasn’t anything else I could do. I’d halfway expected her answer, anyway. “Yeah, he probably wouldn’t be okay with us living together. I just hate being at different places. Whether it’s your place or mine, one of our apartments won’t get used, and it’s kind of pointless to pay rent on a place you’re not living in.”

  Her smile started slow, and then it took over her face. “You’re going to make a great lawyer. I can tell. It won’t hurt to talk to my parents about it, but there’s a good chance I will need you to argue a strong case.”

  “You’re my Yen. I’ll always fight for you. So if we get your parents’ approval, are you in?”

  She held my face in her hands and leaned forward. “Creed Wallace, of course I want to live with you. I wanted it before tonight, but I knew how unrealistic it would be to live together and not have sex.”

  My brows pinched together as I regarded her. “Is that why you had sex tonight?”

  “That would imply I knew you’d ask me to live with you. And I’m a graphic design student, not a mind reader. I had sex with you tonight because I wanted to. Because I am in love with y
ou.”

  “Did you come here planning to do that?”

  Her cheeks flamed bright red, matching the shade of the rest of her water-heated skin. “Honestly, I’d thought about it. I wanted to. But I had no idea what would happen once I got here. Not to mention, it’s your parents’ house. I’m sure once the high of it wears off, I’ll be mortified I not only had sex with you while your parents were downstairs, but lost my virginity in their guestroom—and took a bath with you.”

  “Don’t be…I lost mine in this house. Think of it as a tradition. My mom is a huge believer in traditions,” I said with a laugh and watched her expression soften. “It’s not like they can say anything, anyway. They don’t know what we did. And if we move in together, I’m sure they aren’t naïve enough to think we wouldn’t be sleeping together. And…” I added with my finger in the air to punctuate my point. “We’re going to be together forever. So they’ll really have nothing to say.”

  “Forever?” Her eyes grew wide and her lips parted. It was obvious she had to fight back the smile wanting to take over. “That’s rather presumptuous of you, Creed. How do you know I’d even want to spend forever with you?”

  “You may only be a graphic design student, but I’m a mind reader. I read your mind the first night we met. Have you forgotten about that already?”

  “You read my palm. Completely different.”

  I took her hand out of the water and uncurled her fingers. I traced the deep valleys like I had that night in my car, running a path along the edges of her palm. “It says right here you want to spend forever with me. It says you love me, and you’re the best thing to have ever happened to me, and you never want to let me go.”