A Reason to Sing

by Michelle Lindo-Rice

  Tiffany’s face filled the screen. Karlie dissolved into tears.

  “Honey, I know I won’t be here when you walk down the aisle, but I want you to know that I have faith that you have chosen well. I want you to know I’m proud of you.”

  The video clip had been spliced from different tapings with Tiffany and then compiled to make a special announcement to her daughter. There were clips of Tiffany singing and even when she was in the hospital.

  “Be happy. Be free. Choose love. I love you.” Tiffany blew a kiss on the screen before it went blank. There wasn’t a dry eye in the house.

  Ryan was impressed with Brian’s thoughtfulness and creativity. He was truly proud. Brian had become a remarkable man. How had that happened? Ryan knew it wasn’t because of him; it was in spite of him.

  Brian held Karlie in his arms until her tears ebbed. He kissed her forehead and slipped a wedding band on her finger. “Karlie, my love, I’m honored that you chose me above all other men to give the gift of yourself. Your beauty transcends any earthly jewel because it shines from within. Your faith in me made me a better man. Your faith in God led me to a better life. Today, I give you all of me. I’ve given God my soul but you have all that’s left of me. Karlie, I pledge you my heart, my mind and my body and I vow to earn the privilege of being your husband every day for the rest of my life.”

  Neil declared them husband and wife but neither heard because Brian was already kissing his wife. Ryan cheered with the rest of the crowd, knowing they had witnessed a magical moment. One no one present would ever forget.

  Ch. 33

  “You’ve fallen for him, haven’t you?” Agent Gray asked.

  Megan had ushered the two agents inside her home. Once again, they came when Ryan had left for work. He had offered to drop Cooper off to daycare, and for once she allowed Ryan the privilege.

  Megan hadn’t wanted to answer the door, but she knew they would return. It was best to let the agents in, hear them out in her living room, and continue with her day.

  Both agents sat on the couch, while Megan curled up in the Garbo leather wingback chair.

  “Are you in love with your new husband?” Agent Gray asked.

  “What a ridiculous question,” Megan said, lowering her eyes. “I have my reasons for marrying Ryan, and love wasn’t one of them.”

  Agent Gray lifted an eyebrow. “You said wasn’t. Does that mean your feelings have changed?”

  She gritted her teeth. “I don’t want to discuss my feelings or lack thereof with anyone.” She hadn’t even had this conversation with herself. Megan supposed she was in lust with Ryan.

  “You never called,” Agent Wilders said in an accusatory tone. “I take it to mean you’ve decided against helping us and you no longer think Ryan killed your husband.”

  She glared. “I have a toddler to take care of. I haven’t called because Ryan doesn’t discuss business here at home. When he’s home, he plays with Cooper.” And with her.

  Agent Gray rubbed his chin. “This sounds like one big happy family. We’ve seen the three of you going to church together every Saturday morning.”

  Megan clenched her jaw to keep from shivering. She didn’t like the fact that she was being watched. “I haven’t done anything wrong.” She hated how defensive her tone sounded. She had no reason to feel guilty because she hadn’t thought of Jackson as much these past weeks. He would have wanted her to live, she reasoned. But, not with Ryan. The guilt of that knowledge roiled her stomach.

  She noticed Agent Gray’s eyes were pinned on her legs.

  Megan pulled her skirt below her knees. “I have to get going. I have to be at the church in an hour.” Megan had begun giving free guitar and piano lessons for the children at A Better Life. She had been asked to provide voice training as well but was still undecided.

  Agent Wilders leaned forward. “While you’ve been busy playing house, we’ve been doing some investigating. Jackson’s former secretary has been very chatty.”

  “You spoke to Nancy?” Megan asked. “I thought Nancy moved to Colorado.”

  “There are phones,” Agent Wilders said.

  “She had plenty to say,” Agent Gray said. “Especially about you and Jackson.”

  Megan clasped her hands so the agents wouldn’t see them shaking. “Nancy didn’t like me too much, so I wouldn’t take stock in much of anything she says.”

  “She said the last month before Jackson’s death, you and Jackson had several screaming matches in the office.”

  “Every couple quarrels,” Megan shot back.

  “Let me review my notes.” Agent Wilders took out his notebook and flipped through the pages. “You accused Jackson of stealing your trust fund.”

  “Yes.” Her heart raced.

  “Jackson accused you of having an affair.”

  She slammed a fist in her hand. “I didn’t. I would never cheat on my husband. I made those vows before man and God and I kept them.” Megan closed her eyes.

  “He seemed to think you were having an affair,” Agent Wilders said. “He had a private investigator follow you when you were supposed to be going to church.”

  Tears ran down her face. The agents were digging deep into her past pain. “I don’t know why he did that. Jackson knew me.” She licked her lips. “I needed moments to myself. Jackson was suffocating me. He was convinced someone was after him. He kept me and Cooper in this house like we were prisoners. Cooper had to be with one of us at all times. Church was the only place he’d let me go alone.”

  “Did you have an affair, Mrs. Oakes?” Agent Gray asked. “It’s no shame if you did.”

  He placed a photograph of her and Henry hugging. Megan’s eyes filled with tears.

  Megan shook her head. “I wasn’t having an affair. I went to the park to breathe and to think. I made a friend. Henry and I were friends. I don’t even know his last name. He’s twice my age and married. We would talk about our lives.”

  “Really?” Agent Gray said. “These pictures tell a different story.”

  Megan rolled her eyes. “Henry’s wife passed from cancer. I was comforting him.” She shook her head. “And that is all I ever did.” She broke down and sobbed.

  Agent Gray came to her side. “What happened after that?”

  “Jackson called me in a rage. He demanded I come by his office.” She bit back a sob. “I rushed over there, clueless.” She shuddered. “When I arrived, Jackson started yelling at me. He showed me the picture and accused me of cheating.”

  “Nancy said you both were yelling,” Agent Wilders said.

  “I wasn’t going to let him talk to me like that,” Megan said.

  “Was he abusing you?” Agent Gray asked.

  Megan stilled. The words she knew she should say were stuck at her throat. “Not before that day. He was stressed because of the whole case with Ryan. Jackson was a good man. He was my best friend.”

  Agent Wilders waved off her excuses. “What else happened that day?”

  “He pushed me into the wall,” she whispered. “We both heard a gasp and realized Nancy had seen him. He closed the door. I pushed him back. I yelled that he…” She sniffled. “I said he disgusted me. I told him if he put his hands on me again, I would kill him.” She put a fist in her mouth. “I didn’t mean it. I was angry and upset.”

  “What happened next?”

  Megan lowered her head. “He pinned me against the wall, twisted my hair, and squeezed my neck.” She placed a hand around her neck, reliving that moment. “I… I couldn’t breathe.”

  “And then?” Agent Gray asked.

  “I kicked him in the groin. Then I opened the door and ran.”

  “What did you say before you left?” Agent Wilders asked.

  Megan shook her head. She sobbed. “I didn’t mean it. I didn’t mean it.”

  “What did you say?” he repeated.

  “I said I was leaving him. I told him not to come home. I said if he stepped in that house he would be a dead man.”


  And the next day, she had found Jackson hanging.

  “After he…died. Nancy blamed me,” Megan said. “She said my words pushed Jackson to kill himself. I told her words couldn’t kill him, but deep down I believed her. If he committed suicide, it was my fault. I was so mad, I wished him out of my life forever…and he left me…forever…because of my words...”

  Agent Gray held her while tears wracked her body. Megan sobbed for several moments before she drew deep breaths. She felt raw and exposed. Megan massaged her temples.

  “They were only words,” Agent Wilders said, his voice softening.

  “And we believe Jackson didn’t commit suicide,” Agent Gray said. “He was murdered.”

  Megan nearly keeled over. “He was…murdered?”

  Agent Gray nodded. “We have forensic proof.”

  Megan felt relief flood her being. “I knew it. I knew Jackson wouldn’t leave us like this. He was a fighter.” She exhaled. All the pain, the anger, the depression she’d felt all these months and carried in her heart evaporated. Tears of joy and relief flowed down her face soaking her chin, her shirt, but Megan didn’t care. She felt free and…vindicated.

  She smiled through her tears. “Thank you for this. You don’t know what a relief it is to be able to tell Cooper his father didn’t abandon him.” Megan excused herself and went to wash her face. She blew her nose and looked into the mirror. She didn’t care about her reddened nose and cheeks. It was her eyes. They held something she hadn’t seen since Jackson’s death. Hope. Now all they had to do was find Jackson’s killer.

  She hurriedly washed her hands and stopped in the kitchen to grab three bottles of water.

  “Who would want my husband, I mean, Jackson dead?” Megan asked, handing each agent a bottle. That was the question uppermost on her mind.

  Megan waved off their thanks and opened her bottle. She drank almost half before placing her bottle on a coaster on the coffee table.

  “Jackson might have been involved in a conspiracy to overthrow the government,” Agent Wilders said. “We think he was dealing with some dangerous men and got in over his head. They wanted something he had, a microchip. When he refused…”

  Megan’s mouth hung open. She felt as if she were in an episode of CSI or NCIS. Then laughter bubbled up within her. She laughed until she cried. She snatched a napkin and wiped her face. “I’m sorry, but you’re mistaken. Jackson was afraid of his shadow. He wasn’t cut out for subterfuge.”

  “Your husband lived a double life.”

  “Not my Jackson,” Megan said. “There is no way that—”

  “It’s true,” Agent Gray interrupted. “I’m sorry, but it’s true.”

  Megan stopped laughing.

  “He had another wife,” Agent Gray said.

  The agent’s words sunk into her brain. Megan jumped to her feet. “You’re lying. I don’t believe you. What kind of sick game are you two playing? If Jackson had another wife, don’t you think I’d know it? She would’ve been at the police station or even at the funeral. Jackson’s death made national news. This woman would have to be under a rock to have missed that.”

  “Or six feet under,” Agent Wilders supplied. “The other Mrs. Higgins died in a car accident a few weeks before Jackson’s death. She lived in Valley Stream.”

  Jackson’s office was in Valley Stream. Megan shook her head but then flashes of late night phone calls and text messages… But, her heart closed at the truth. “This is ridiculous.” Megan snarled. “You’re not talking about my Jackson. There are probably a hundred Jackson Higgins out there. My Jackson loved me. He wasn’t a bigamist.”

  “He was a computer genius and a master of reinventing himself. He purposely went after women like you who didn’t have any relatives. His other wife, Susan, also had a trust fund. He used your money and hers to start his company.”

  Megan turned away so the men wouldn’t see the doubt she knew had to be on her face. Jackson had needed $75,000 to start his business. She had given him $50,000. All she had. Her shoulders slumped. Had she given away her parents’ legacy to a fraud?

  The Bible verse stating a fool and his money were soon parted came to her. Megan’s shoulders shook. She had been a fool to fall for Jackson. She thought of Ryan. There was no way she would be a fool twice.

  “If it’s any consolation, we have shifted our focus from Ryan. It turns out his overseas affairs are legit. He’s no longer a person of interest in Jackson’s murder. Nancy was his confidant. She knew about Susan and helped managed his shady dealings. Nancy was happy to tell us all of this once she was promised immunity.”

  “How easy it must be for Nancy to blame everything on the dead man.” Her words were filled with bitterness. “How do you know Nancy isn’t the bad guy? She could be framing my husband.”

  “Nancy says there is a microchip to corroborate her story. She doesn’t know where Jackson hid it. We went by your old place, and someone had already ransacked it. We plan on questioning Ryan to see if he knows anything about it.”

  Megan gasped. Someone had been in her home and violated it. Her heart pierced. “Why is this happening?” She felt dazed. This was too much coming at her at once. “And if you just cleared Ryan of any wrongdoing, why are you questioning him?” She rubbed her temples as she tried to process the startling revelations.

  “He still might know something,” Agent Wilders said. “There is something else you should know.”

  Megan slumped into the chair. “Honestly, I don’t think I can take any more revelations.” Then she belied her words by gesturing for him to continue. “Tell me.”

  “Susan Higgins had been months pregnant. It was a girl. Jackson didn’t know and Nancy didn’t either.”

  Megan clutched her stomach. Pain sliced through her heart. “Please, go,” she begged. “I’ve had enough. This…this is too much.”

  With a pat on the shoulder and a perfunctory, “We’ll be in touch,” the agents exited her home leaving Megan to deal with the fact that they had hacked away at what had been her life. She felt spent and dejected. Megan slid to the floor.

  I married a bigamist.

  He had another family.

  Another child.

  Another home.

  My home has been destroyed. I had many wonderful memories there. Her shoulders sagged. And every memory was part of a sham.

  Everything but Cooper.

  Megan gulped. Cooper is the only real thing I have going in my life right now.

  Ch. 34

  “Why did the FBI come to see you again?”

  Ryan confronted Megan the next morning. He had waited all evening for her to tell him about the visit, but Megan had ignored him, barely eaten, and played with Cooper instead. They awoke before Cooper did, got dressed, and now stood in his kitchen. It was ten minutes before seven. Ryan figured they had an hour before Cooper awakened.

  “Again? So you know about their visits?” Megan’s eyes flashed.

  “I know.”

  “Why are you keeping me under surveillance as well?” She didn’t wait for him to answer. “I’m sick and tired of people checking my every move. If you think I’m going to live my life under constant scrutiny like I’m an insect under a microscope, you’d better think again.

  “It’s for your protection,” Ryan said. “I have to make sure—”

  “I want a regular boring life!” Megan interrupted. “This is not a regular boring life! I’ve had enough with all this deception!”

  “I have a security team of twelve men that rotate so I have twenty-four hour protection, but I recently doubled it adding you and Cooper to their detail. They’re discreet. I won’t apologize for it. I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you freaking out like you are now. Since Jackson brought the case against me, I’ve been targeted with hate mail. I can’t risk anything happening to you and Cooper.”

  Her eyes challenged him. “Cooper and I are fine. I can’t believe you have people following us night and day. You need to worry about yo
urself. The FBI is watching you.”

  Ryan sat back in the chair. He was careful to keep his expression neutral. “Did they say why?”

  “They think you were involved in some shady overseas business.” She waved a hand. “They wanted me to call if I heard anything that could help their case.”

  “What did you tell them?” Ryan drummed his fingers on the table.

  “I told them the truth, that I didn’t know anything.”

  “My business affairs are all legit. Everything’s above inspection.” Ryan saw her shoulders sag and she breathed a sigh of relief. “I couldn’t be in business with Michael Ward and not keep everything on the up and up.”

  “You don’t know how relieved I am to hear that.”

  “I’m pretty sure the FBI knows that too.” He cocked his head. “What else did they have to say?” Had they found out about Frank?

  “They said Jackson was a fraud.” She shook her head. “He wasn’t the man I thought he was. All night, I’ve been going over my life with Jackson. I can’t believe it was all one big lie. He had another fam—family. Another wife and a child on the way. I-I wanted another child, but Jackson said we should wait.” The words poured from her. “He made sure he was careful with me, yet he’d made another child with her. Susan. Her name is Susan.”

  She rested her head in her hands, mumbling incoherently. Ryan went over to her and gathered her in his arms. He had received a package in the mail, which revealed Jackson’s double life and his other wife. Ryan was pretty sure Frank had sent it. Ryan had shredded the documents, never intending for Megan to learn the truth. He wanted to shield her from the heartbreak of Jackson’s betrayal.

  The FBI had told Megan about Jackson for only one reason. They wanted Ryan to give up the microchip. They must think he had it.

  They weren’t the only ones. Frank wanted it, too. It was the only evidence that could put Frank away for life.

  The thing is, Ryan didn’t have it. But he had promised Frank he would get it. He had called Frank when he had received the package. Frank had urged Ryan to find the chip. He even threatened to take Cooper if Ryan didn’t deliver. He felt Megan was the key to finding the chip and Cooper would serve as…inspiration.