He brought his free hand up to his gasmask, pausing as his middle finger touched the release button in the back of it. It was the finger with his blackbird tattoo, presently covered by gloves meant to protect him from the toxic air.
Closing his eyes and thinking of Deryn, he pressed the release.
The mask opened and he pulled it off slowly, holding his breath and closing his eyes for a moment. When he opened them again he waited for the world around him to become clear before taking his first breath. He blinked and looked up at the bright blue sky. This was it. The outside world without the haze of a mask in front of his eyes.
Xander gulped as he took in the trees towering over him, a soft breeze waving their branches and hitting his face. It wasn't until he felt a chill that he realized his cheeks were wet. He closed his eyes again and let the tears fall willingly, whimpering as he fell to his knees, tearing off his glove so he could run it through the grass beneath him. He plucked a small yellow flower growing nearby and gave it a whiff. Not especially aromatic but he still tucked it in his pocket to give to Deryn later.
Getting back to his feet, the gasmask now hanging from his belt, Xander wiped his cheeks with his bare hand, gave his small tattoo a rub and continued on. At first his breathing was a bit off but, eventually, it evened out, inhaling this air as he would any other. Because it was the same.
Before long Xander came across a heavy slab of stone, the edges too smooth to have been made by natural causes. He brushed his fingers through his hair as he entered the ruins Deryn played in as a child, suddenly feeling nervous that he was here to meet the brother of the girl he loved. After all their years knowing of each other, he and Talon had never actually met before. He didn't come out of hiding much and Xander hoped to find out why. One would think he'd be first in line to rescue his sister, but on every raid the Resistance had ever made he was never there.
Xander left the thick patch of trees he'd been walking under and entered a more open part of the forest littered with stone buildings, some still towering higher than the trees around them but looking terribly unsafe. Others had caved in or collapsed long ago and only left small pieces in their wake.
He had never seen anything like it before. Deryn told him she used to have books with pictures of ancient cities but he hadn't had another chance to go to Redwood and search for them. He stared up at the tall buildings and shattered windows with branches growing out of them, and wondered what this place had once been like. Before the world went to shit. He bet it was beautiful.
Hearing something hidden in the trees, Xander took his Element out of its holster, placed it on the ground and stepped away.
"Unarmed," he said, holding up his hands. "As promised."
Someone stepped out of the trees wearing a green coat that blended well with its surroundings. Talon Leon walked forward, his shaggy hair pushed out of his eyes so he was able to stare coldly at Xander without any obstacles. He held a gun at his side, but there was no need to aim it since Xander was well aware that there were three -
A leaf crunched behind him.
- four other people scattered around the ruins, their weapons trained on him.
Talon stopped walking a good five steps away from Xander and scanned him up and down. His eyes stopped on his face, investigating it for a moment before he realized what wasn't right.
"Where's your gasmask?"
Xander smirked and pointed to where he had attached it to his belt.
"Why aren't you wearing it?"
"The very same reason I decided it was time to contact you." Xander lowered his arms to his sides. "The president shared something with me recently. A Saevus family secret, if you will. So answer me honestly, Talon Leon." He paused and gulped. "All this time. Did you know?"
Talon blinked. It took a moment but, eventually, Xander's words hit and understanding entered his eyes.
"So you did know," said Xander with a frown. "A vital piece of information to help your cause, yet you chose to keep it to yourself."
"You really believe any of your people would listen if I told them -"
"A week ago I wouldn't be standing here in front of you like this!" spat Xander, pointing at his bare face. "Not everyone would have believed you, but some would have. I would have." He crossed his arms and breathed heavily. "Deryn didn't know."
Something sparked in Talon at the mention of his sister. His eyes - her eyes - lit up with a brief moment of hope, and Xander found himself staring into them, the small bit of her in there keeping him from pouncing on this man for being such an idiot.
"What are you looking at?" asked Talon.
Xander didn't answer. Just kept staring.
Talon knitted his brow. "The hell, Ruby? You falling in love with me, or something?"
Xander couldn't stifle his laugh. "If you were only so lucky. I was just noticing the Leon eyes are brighter than the Saevuses."
"My gran said it was the sunlight," said Talon, a hint of sadness in his voice. "Don't think there was much merit behind it."
"How long have you known?" asked Xander, point blank.
"I thought we were here to talk about Der -"
"Humor me."
Talon huffed and glanced up to where one of his comrades stood. Even in baggy clothing, Xander knew that figure. Small yet muscular with curvy hips.
Nita nodded.
"Five years and change," he answered. "I'm sure you can guess when my dad decided to share that information with me. And I haven't come forward with it because he told me not to. He thought exposing the president's lies like that while Deryn was in his possession would be a foolish move."
"At least it would have been a move. Do you really believe she's been better off these last five years than if she'd just been executed right at the beginning?"
Talon tensed, all color draining from his tan face. If it weren't for his golden skin he and Deryn would actually look quite a bit alike, but it really made all the difference.
Xander cocked an eyebrow. "Don't tell me you were under the impression she was treated well all these years? Because, I assure you, she wasn't."
With a clenched jaw, Talon asked, "Why are you here, Ruby? To remind me what a terrible brother I am? Because I don't need the reminder! You said you wanted to speak to me so why don't you shut up and tell me what's so damn important you couldn't just say it over the two-way."
"Is that what it's called?" asked Xander, genuinely curious. "Huh. I've just been calling it a radio."
"Yes, a two-way radio. Our ancestors used them."
"Fancy." He smirked. "You forget that you're the one who asked me to meet you here. And I came because, judging from what I overheard between you and the missus on the two-way, you're looking for another way into Utopia."
"Of course we are."
"Then do me a favor and don't fucking waste it trying to take me prisoner this time. I have Deryn in my possession. I'm admitting it. She escaped four and a half months ago on her own and I came across her shortly after. So when you find your way in contact me and get her out. Before anything else. I don't care if you have some other fucking agenda to take care of, you get her first. And I mean you."
Talon blinked. "Why?"
"Why you?"
He nodded.
"Because, as of right now, she's refusing to leave Utopia, and I believe you or your dad are the only ones capable of convincing her to go. And since he's been missing in action for the past five years, that leaves one. Though you haven't exactly been running into the line of fire."
Talon's nostrils flared. "I'm sure Dax could convince -"
"No, he couldn't."
He could tell Talon wanted to question that statement but, for whatever reason, he kept his mouth shut and glanced at Nita again.
"Why do you keep looking at her? You're in charge, aren't you? You shouldn't need someone else to make your decisions."
"I've never exactly been in a situation like this before," said Talon. "And I don't understand why Deryn would ever choose to stay in Utopi
a if she had an out."
Xander stared down at the ground and sighed softly. "She doesn't want to leave me there alone. But the reason I'm here now without a gasmask, the reason the president shared a family secret with me is because he's chosen me to continue his legacy. If I just up and vanish one day he won't stop searching for me until I'm dead, along with anyone who helps me. If there was ever a chance for me to escape I've already missed it."
Talon closed his eyes and started massaging the bridge of his nose, clearly fighting off the urge to look at Nita. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but I think you're telling the truth." He opened his eyes and walked forward, grabbing Xander's jaw and holding it still so he could look properly into the man's eyes.
"Now who's falling in love -"
"Shut it, Ruby. I need to figure this out." Talon stared into Xander's eyes for a good, long while, grunting every now and then as he tried to read something behind them. "I want to speak to her," he finally said, releasing Xander's jaw but keeping eye contact. "Tonight. I want to hear her voice before I make any decisions."
Xander clicked his tongue. "That's a little complicated."
"Why?"
"She doesn't exactly know I'm here, and she'll be fucking pissed when -"
"I don't care. Get her on the two-way tonight or no deal."
Xander grunted. "Fair enough. But, like I said, she's going to be fucking pissed and she already doesn't want to go, so there's a fairly good chance she won't speak."
Breaking their eye contact, Talon fisted something in his pocket. Xander was going to make a joke about it until he saw the flash of sadness pass through the other man's eyes. He reached into his pocket and pulled something out, holding open his palm so Xander could see. It was a bracelet, clearly a home craft adorned with various pieces of rubble used as charms.
"Deryn made this for me ..." Talon paused and gulped. "... a long time ago. She used things she found here, our ancestors objects." He touched a small black piece. "This was a piece of a record that was unsalvageable." Then a small wheel. "This was from a toy car. She gave it to me and I laughed at her, thinking it was the ugliest thing I'd ever seen. Two days later I was recruited and she stuffed it in my pocket before I was taken away." A tear slid down his cheek as he shoved it into Xander's hand. "I'm going to need that back. But just ... show it to her. And ..." Another gulp. "And I was always there. I promised my dad I would never be in the line of fire, but I was there on every last mission we had to try and rescue her. Do you know how fucking heartbreaking it is to have to wait outside in the shadows while others follow your plan for rescue? Your failed plan? Every single time I failed."
"Then I trust you'll be sure not to fail this time." Xander glanced at the bracelet before slipping it into his pocket beside the flower he'd picked earlier. "You'll get this back when you get your sister, and I trust you'll take a moment when that happens to thank her for making you something from the heart." He smirked. "I should be able to get to her by nine tonight, so make sure you're tuned in. It's been a pleasure doing business with you."
Xander held out his hand. Talon stared at it hesitantly before giving in and shaking. He backed away slowly as Xander reached for his Element. While he was down, one of the trio of onlookers who weren't Nita jumped down and hurried over to him. Once Xander was up straight, the stranger clapped him on the back.
Xander cried out in agony, falling to his knees as the pain he still felt from his healing gashes shot through him.
"What the hell are you doing?" demanded Talon, hurrying over and shoving his comrade.
"He said he was whipped and I wanted to know if he was lying. I told you to demand to see them," said the man, his voice sharp and full of malice. "He could be acting now."
"You bastard!" Xander jumped up and swung his fist, knocking the man to the ground, his gasmask going crooked and revealing part of a face he thought he recognized.
With a grunt, Xander dropped his coat and lifted his shirt, showing the red and scabbed marks that were finally healing.
"My punishment for your stupidity, you fucking twat." He lowered his shirt and grabbed his coat and Element, making sure to give the man on the ground a hard kick in the side as he passed him.
"You are a fucking twat," he heard Nita say as she jumped down, appearing aggravated as she helped her comrade to his feet. Then she lifted her mask and sprinted after Xander.
"Dammit, Neetles!" shouted Talon, running after her.
"Hey!"
Xander whipped around when he heard her voice, his eyes flaming. She tossed something to him and he caught it. A small, clear bottle with a yellow liquid.
"I know Utopian medicine is supposed to be way more advanced than ours and everything, but your cuts look damn angry. Put that in your bath tonight. It's all natural and should calm them."
"I hate to break it to you, but my cuts are lacking emotion."
She chuckled. "You're funny. I don't remember you being funny back in Eagle."
"Young Xander was fucking hilarious." He put the bottle in his pocket, which was getting fairly full. "Thanks."
"For what it's worth, I told Dax his whole plan to kidnap you was beyond stupid, but orders are orders." She glanced over her shoulder and gave Talon - who was standing only two steps behind her - a sharp look. "I'll personally make sure he's in no way involved in this mission."
"Smart girl," said Xander, looking past her to Talon. "Hold on to this one. Get rid of the fucker who doesn't follow orders."
"He's on my team," admitted Nita. "And, believe me, he and I are having a long and brutal discussion tonight that'll have him begging for a new captain." She grinned.
"I like you," said Xander. "Makes sense that you and Deryn were friends. I'll bet you raised hell together."
"Are friends," she corrected. "And yes, we did." She smiled sadly. "And, to be clear, if we don't get Deryn or Talon's bracelet back, and you betray us in any way, I'll be second in line to kill you. Talon's first."
Xander raised his eyebrows. "Fair enough. Though, I should warn you, I'm not an easy target."
"And I never miss."
The two of them shared a smile. Xander nodded at Talon and walked away, already trying to come up with the best way to tell Deryn about this meeting. She'd be angry. There was definitely no avoiding that. There never was.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Xander checked the clock on his wristband as he stepped through the door to his apartment building. Less than five minutes until nine o'clock.
He'd been right about the time he would get home, which meant he had very little time to explain everything to Deryn before her brother would expect to hear her voice.
He sighed and headed up the stairs. As he reached the fourth floor he heard his front door open. Deryn was waiting for him at the top.
"You're later than expected," she said as he approached, holding out her arms. "Has the bastard decided to share more secrets with you?"
"No," said Xander, reaching her arms and happily walking into them. He wrapped his around her waist and nuzzled his cheek into her bosom. "I went outside."
Deryn tensed in his arms. "Did you take off your -"
"Yes. A breeze feels nice." He took the small yellow flower out of his pocket and pulled away so he could hand it to her properly.
Deryn smiled as she took it. "Did you go to the beach?"
"Not today," he said, his eyes lowering to the floor. "Let's get inside."
She knitted her brow, knowing immediately that something was off but not questioning it just yet.
He took her hand and the two of them walked inside. Once his shoes were off, he sat her down at the dining room table and told her to wait there. She did as instructed, twirling the flower between her fingers nervously while she waited for him to return.
When Xander came back he was carrying the two-way radio she had found in his pocket the day President Saevus shared his stupid secret with him. She had been meaning to bring it up again but wanted him to be in a happie
r, stable state of mind first. He wasn't quite there yet.
Xander pulled one of the chairs around and sat beside her, placing the two-way on the table. "Do you know what this is?" he asked.
She nodded. "My dad had one. It was how he and his comrades communicated with each other when they went out exploring."
"Right. And now your brother uses them."
She stiffened, all color draining from her already pale cheeks. "Xander, you ... you didn't ..."
"The night Saevus told me everything I used it on a whim and he was on the other end, communicating with your friend Nita who's back in the underground trying to find another way in."
"And did you -"
"Yes."
Her body began to shake. Whether from anger or fear, she didn't know but it wouldn't stop. "You spoke to him. Without asking me first."
"I didn't need your permission -"
Her head whipped towards him, her eyes flaming. "Yes. You. Did," she said through gritted teeth. "The last time you tried talking to the Resistance you were nearly killed!"
"Which is why I was careful about it this time. Dakota wasn't allowed anywhere near our meeting."
"Your what?" she snapped, rising from her chair and slamming her hands on the table, nearly crushing the yellow flower. "Are you insane?"
"Apparently," he said. "But I'm fine, Deryn. I took off my mask and put down my weapon. We had a very pleasant conversation."
"Ha!" she spat. "You're lucky you weren't killed!"
"No, I'm lucky your brother isn't as big of an idiot as your boyfriend."
She smacked the back of his head. "Stop that! Why would you call him that now? What's wrong with you?"
Xander sighed and rubbed the spot she had hit. "Sorry," he said. "But I knew if I told you ahead of time you would've forbidden me to go and I have a hard time saying no to you. Now please sit and let me explain."
While she did as he instructed, she certainly didn't look happy about it.
"Deryn, you know it's not safe for you here anymore. It never was but it's getting harder and harder to hide you with each passing day. Other Guardians are watching my every move, the president has such faith in me that when it's shattered all hell will undoubtedly break loose, and I love you too much to ever risk you being recaptured and used as a tool against me. So your brother and I made a deal. As soon as they find another way in their very first task will be getting you out. Just you."
Sunken Eyes (Cruel and Beautiful World Book 2) Page 27