The Making of Americans, Being a History of a Family's Progress

by Stein, Gertrude

  Now there are some having attacking being in them having sensitiveness in them as passion in them and these can have it in them to be successful, to be failing in living, to be wise or foolish in living, to have sense for living, to have not too much sense for living, to have much, to have little sensitiveness in them, to have it thinly, thickly, intermittently in them, to be using it in every way in living, to have it very delicately in them, to have it fairly coarsely in them, but mostly these having it in them although they may be succeeding although they may be failing, are not really without some sense for living in them. They can be anything, some practical, some religious, some earnest, some careless, some ambitious, some critical, some very weak in living, some very intermittent in doing anything, all having passion in them as sensitive being.

  Then there are some having attacking being as sensitive being as emotion in them, these can be quite melancholy often in living, these can be quite aggressive in living and to every one can be content and energetic in living, and self-satisfying and these can have it in them that they have trouble in having it as being that sensitiveness is in them as emotion, they can have it that they have not in them any power of resisting when they have it not in them to be practical in living. I know now some of such of them. I will certainly sometime tell more of such of them. Two of such of them are just now in my feeling every minute in my living.

  Then there are some having attacking being that have sensitiveness in them as being really excitement inside but mostly these then do not have it in them to have sensitiveness really in them. Perhaps they have spots of sensitiveness in them, times for sensitiveness in them.

  Now I will begin telling a little about how some come to learn or not learn in living. Always I am telling of the attacking kind in men and women. Always now I will be keeping on telling of the attacking kind in men and women until I have given a good description a really good description of Julia Dehning and what every one who knew Julia in living thought about the being she had in her all her living.

  Surely every one has a way of learning something. This is now to be very little description of how some connected in being with Julia Dehning learn what they do learn in living, this then is connected with sensitiveness in them as is of course a natural thing as any one ever thinking about learning can certainly be understanding.

  I am now understanding all the ways the attacking kind in men and women have sensitiveness in them. I am feeling some having attacking being in them having sensitiveness in them and I am not understanding what way sensitiveness is in them.

  I have been seeing some, I have been knowing some some, I have been hearing about some having attacking being in them and I am not realising of them the way sensitiveness is in them. I have not been loving any of this kind in men and women, I would like to be loving some one some, of this kind in men and women, I would like to be knowing certainly the way sensitiveness is in them in this kind of the attacking kind in women and men. I am feeling some one of this kind in men and women. I know some thing of the character in them, something of the way they do some things in living, but they are a kind of them that are really different from these kinds I have been describing. I will not now be telling my troubles to every one. It is enough that I have been saying that I am not understanding all the ways sensitiveness is in the attacking kind in men and women.

  I am realising some sensitiveness in some who have attacking being in them. Soon I will tell complete histories of each one having sensitive being in them. That will certainly be helping to make a long book interesting. I could tell it very completely now of some. I will not just now be beginning this thing. I am certainly now writing a history of being in Julia Dehning being living.

  As I was saying some having attacking being in them, having independent dependent being in them have it in them to have sensitiveness in them as passion in them. I was telling about one having attacking being and having it as wobbling, having it as being in this one as a soft jelly mass making of this one an individual one by the skin of this one separating this one from any other one. I have been telling about attacking being in Martha Hersland, in Mr. David Hersland in Redfern. I have been telling something of attacking being in some others because I was telling then about such other ones. I am remembering pretty completely everything I have been telling. I am always thinking I am not remembering what I am going to be telling what I have been telling but really I am remembering pretty well what I have been telling, what I am telling, what I am going to be telling. Now I am telling about some ways of having sensitiveness and learning in some having attacking being, independent dependent being in them.

  Julia Dehning as I have been saying was always resisting changing the attacking way she had had, was having, would be having all her living. As I was saying she had not really then sense for living. As I was saying she was not really an unsuccessful one in living. As I was saying Mrs. Dehning was stupid in attacking when she was attacking and not for any winning. This was in her always in her daily living. As I was saying Mrs. Dehning had some sense for living. As I was saying she was an important enough one in daily living.

  There are very many who are wanting to be learning in their living. Some as I have been saying of Julia Dehning are wanting anything because they are feeling that anything can feed them. Some something like Julia Dehning can feel having teaching, some something like Julia Dehning can feel a little the thing some one has been teaching them, some something like Julia Dehning can be feeling giving teaching, some something like Julia Dehning are every minute feeling teaching to them feeling teaching from them, either feeling teaching being given to them or being given by them, always then feeling teaching, always then feeling teaching being given, this is very common with many having in them not really any sensitiveness to the teaching itself that has been given, that they are giving. To begin again. There are many having sensitiveness in them to some one teaching, to there being one teaching some one, to their teaching some one and have in them the very least possible sensitiveness to the teaching that is being taught then. This is very common. Some have not any in them sensitiveness to the thing taught by any one and these have it in them to have really sensitiveness to there being teaching done to them, by them, to some one, by some one. Now this is certainly quite common and this is bringing this writing always nearer to Julia Dehning. As I was saying Julia needed anything because in her feeling in her being everything could be feeding her in living. Now as I was saying Julia had being that was one resisting, being stupid in resisting anything that could be touching her in relation to her always being in her way persisting in attacking. Really then Julia had not in her any way of learning anything. Really she had it in her that she was being an excited one in seizing everything, seizing anything to learn that thing and always then she had it in her being that she was a stupid one in not being able to not be a resisting one in a stubborn way to anything teaching her in any way to be an attacking one. This then is being in her and as any one can see it would make of her one not having really sense for living, one having not necessarily failing in living, one being one interesting to some, one being one certainly in a way having courage in living. As I was saying she was of the attacking, of the independent dependent kind in women and men. She had dependent being in her of the independent dependent kind of being but this really was in her only when rarely it did happen to her some one did tell her she had not really any way of learning in her. Then she had it in her as the dependent independent dependent attacking kind in women and men have it in them, she had it in her to be certain that not the last end of a bad thing could happen to her and then surely some one did have it to be certain that she certainly could learn something and so then she had it in her this not as a religion but she had in her then the certain feeling of right conviction. And see then every one reading this thing that this one Julia Dehning had conviction in her that she was one to be an attacking one resisting any one changing any attacking in her being and she was one seizing being one learni
ng and always then really she could not be learning anything. It is a clear thing then that she had not in her anything of religion. It is certainly a clear thing this thing that she did not have in her with dependent independent dependent being in her anything in her of religion, she could and did and would have and mostly must have conviction, she must be having the sensation of certain feeling to be going on attacking, having courage really in all of her living. She was completely then a stupid one in being a resisting one resisting any changing in her being in a way an attacking one having courage in living. She had then certainly not sense for living. She was then certainly in living not one failing in living. She was one seizing being one learning anything, learning everything, she was one feeling being one needing anything, needing everything because not anything was teaching anything in her being. She was one seizing anything that was teaching because she was one having it in her feeling that everything was feeding her in living. She had courage in living, she had not sense for living, she had dependent being in her being of the independent dependent kind as I have been saying, she was not really failing not really succeeding in living. She was one quite interesting to some, quite unpleasant to some, quite irritating to some, quite stimulating to some, quite stupid to some, quite unusually bright to some, quite loving and pathetic to some, quite cold and self-seeking to some, entirely generous and courageous to some, quite failing in really attacking to some, quite entirely honest to some, quite failing in being honest in knowing that sometimes she was lying to some, quite earnest and sensitive to teaching to some, quite impenetrable to anything to some, quite really nice to quite a number knowing her in living, quite open-minded to some, quite completely obstinate to some, quite nervous and fairly excited to every one. This is to be now a history of living in her, of being in her, of what each one knowing her felt in her, what those living with her felt about her, how one can know her, how one can come to know any one, of being in every one.

  This then is certain, feeling that there is and was and will be teaching being given always every day to some one by some, to every one by every one is very much in very many moral feeling, completely moral feeling, completely moral conviction. This is very often in very many not having any feeling in them for anything any one is learning any one is or can he teaching. There being teaching always being given makes of living a moral operation to very many living... Julia Dehning as I was saying was completely needing feeling that always in all daily living teaching was being given by some one by a good many of mostly everything. She was needing learning learning everything for anything could be a food to her that she could have as learning. She had then certainly from this thing completely a moral conviction. She did this needing learning from being one needing to be going on living. This is in very many women in very many men, in pretty nearly ever so many women and men. Teaching then being existing is being existing as being in moral being in very many pretty nearly a very great many men and women.

  Some are feeling each thing they are liking and are not learning anything in living. Some of these have religion in them, some of these have themselves inside them to them as all being in them, some of such of them are completely loving some one. Many are feeling everything in living are not learning anything in living, I know very well one of these in my living and this one has complete feeling of each thing and this one is delicately vibrating and completely loving something and not having any religion, not any moral feeling, not any interest, in any opinion. I know by reading and by hearing of two having it in them that they are completely feeling everything, each thing and are not learning anything in living. These have religion in them, these are certain that the having so much feeling in them with each thing is meaning that they are realising that a god is loving them. I know one and that one is in a way like Julia Dehning and this one is feeling each thing in living and not learning anything and always having a conviction that it is a necessary thing that this one is learning everything so that this one can be having meaning in living and this one has moral conviction. This one needs it that every one is learning everything. I know one who is in living living in her being and completely living with her being and this one is feeling everything and not learning anything in living and this one is needing feeling everything in living and not learning anything in living to make it for herself a complete thing that she is living with her being. Some who are feeling everything feeling anything in living have a little a very little power of realising each thing they are feeling, these could learn something in living if each thing was not succeeding another thing. Some of these can come to learn something in living. Some can learn something in their living, Julia Dehning in a way was not such a one. These I have just been describing are some with attacking being in them who are not learning, not succeeding, not necessarily tailing in living, some of such of them are quite important to a number knowing them in living. They are not really important in living. They have not really sense for living. I am going now again to commence my regular description of being in Julia Dehning, of Dehning family living, of Julia's meeting and marrying and loving and not learning, and not enduring Alfred Hersland, and of her complete living. I am beginning again, not from the beginning this time that is certain.

  The Dehning family as I was saying were living quite completely pleasantly very rich right American living. They were living this in a free way, in a quite generous way, in a completely pleasant way in a fairly energetic way, in a quite successful way, in a fairly gay way, in a quite spirited way, in a fairly peaceful way, in not an ambitious way, in a quite fairly simple way, in a quite thoroughly completely easily pleasant fairly happy reasonably contenting and contented way.

  Family living is a thing a family in a way is realising. Sometimes a family is not at all realising that thing. Mostly a family is in a way knowing the kind of family living they have in them. Sometimes it is a queer thing to have them telling family living. Sometimes it is a very funny thing when some are explaining a family living, sometimes it is a foolish thing, sometimes an irritating thing, very often a quite tedious thing. Family living is a peculiar thing because not any one, mostly, is deciding family living and always each one is himself or herself inside her or him and family living is in a way a combination that in a way is not coming from any one. Sometimes it is coming from some one, sometimes it is a combination thing, sometimes it just happens to be existing. As I am saying the Dehnings had family living in them that was not really expressing Mr. Dehning or Mrs. Dehning or in a way the two together nor in a way the three children. Really one knowing each one of them would be thinking family living would have been a different thing in them from what it really was in them. Really I suppose certainly it was a combination of being in Mr. Dehning and Mrs. Dehning and the three children.

  Family living is a pleasant thing when each one likes to be hearing some telling about what each one likes to be doing in living. Family living when not any one is liking to be listening to what another one is liking in living is not at all a pleasant thing. It is a very difficult thing, for very many, to keep on being one liking to be hearing about what another one in the family is liking in living. So then family living comes to be not any longer existing and sometimes then it is a very troublesome thing. In the Dehning family living they kept on all of them for a really very longtime of living being ready to be listening to what each one liked in living, needed in living, had in living. Dehning family living as I was saying was quite completely a long time a quite pleasant thing. Julia was not really perhaps listening enough to Mrs. Dehning having living to make it later a completely pleasant living but Julia was listening to all the other ones and all the other ones could listen to all the other ones telling about living in them and so really Dehning family living was really pretty nearly a completely pleasant thing.