Just A Step Away (Closer)

by Roberts, Flora

  I let my inhibitions subside and slowly slid my hands around the nape of his neck.

  “I’m gonna kiss you, Lanie.” His words were low, silky.

  I opened my eyes and saw Lucas looking back at me. The expression on his face was full of need. His hooded lids hung heavy over his beautiful eyes, and my knees went weak when he slowly bent and tilted his head. My heart began to race when I felt his hot breath close to my lips. My toes curled and the butterflies in my belly multiplied as they bounced furiously around my belly.

  I couldn’t stop the shudder that went through me when he ran his tongue across his bottom lip and then parted them. The closer he got, the more I wanted that kiss. The more I yearned for it. I grabbed on to the tiny hairs at the nape of his neck, letting him know that I was ready, willing.

  A tiny growl slid up his throat, and his nostrils flared.

  “Lanie Pie!”

  I just about jumped out of my own skin when I heard my mother’s voice coming down the hallway. I met Lucas’ wide eyed expression and reality hit me like a freight train. Quickly pulling myself together, I brought my hands down from his neck.

  I said a silent prayer, suddenly very thankful for the interruption.

  The desire to get my ass out of that room, and away from Lucas, had me turning and opening the door. Lucas’ arm appeared in front of me, and he pressed his hand to the doorframe, blocking my way out.

  I had no choice but to turn my head and glare at him. No words were spoken. I tried not to believe that I knew exactly what that was.

  “Lanie Pie? You awake, baby?”

  I didn’t have time to answer before my mother appeared.

  Lucas quickly moved away from the door, making room for me and giving me that cute good-boy smile of his.

  Wait. Cute?

  “Oh there you kids are! It’s time for dinner. ” My mom smiled brightly at Lucas and I. She looked us up and down and, even though we had separated before she walked in, a knowing smirk stretched across my mother’s aging features. “Did I interrupt...sumthin’?”

  Oh my God. She even waggled her eyebrows. “No, Mama.” I shook my head and my eyes flickered toward the bedroom door in a silent hint for her to leave us. “We’ll be down in a minute.”

  My mother’s face lit up, and I realized that I had referred to her like I used to as a child.

  “Okay, baby.” My mother’s smile never wavered as she slid up next to my side and placed a small kiss against my cheek. “We’ll wait for ya.”

  Once she left the room, thoughts of Lucas’ fingers lingering against my skin consumed me. I could still feel his hot breath against my neck and, as I closed my eyes, I wanted more. I knew that it was wrong. It was the heat of the moment and nothing else. It had to be. Because in a few days, when we were back in LA, we would be laughing our asses off about it.

  “We should go.”

  I kept my back to Lucas and tried to step through the door.

  It was quietly, but firmly, shut right in front of my face by one of Lucas’ hands. He came up and stood right behind me. No. I wouldn’t be able to handle that—he moved closer, standing flush against my back, sending every sense I possessed back into overdrive. He moved closer to stand flush against my back and every one of my senses were on high alert. His breath was hot and thick against the crook of my neck. My nipples once again hardened painfully and a dull ache settled in between my thighs.

  A low whimper escaped my lips. I couldn’t stop it. “What are we doing, Sparky?”

  “Nothing...yet.”

  I drew in a breath when I felt his hands slide up my belly until they reached my breasts and cupped them gently. I wanted to give into every pleasure that I suddenly knew he could give me. One touch, above my clothes, and all I wanted was to feel his naked skin against mine. His lips devouring me. His hard cock deep inside of me.

  That’s what my heart screamed out to me, but my head was telling me different. No matter how overwhelmed my body was, I knew. This could ruin us, our friendship. I couldn’t lose Lucas. I wouldn’t. “Stop, Sparky. Please. Just stop.”

  His hands continued their work. Up and down, sliding across my skin. Throbbing hard between my legs, I started to succumb to his tender touch.

  “We can’t,” I muttered all the while my body screamed at me to shut the fuck up.

  “Why, Lanie? Give me one good reason why we can’t,” he whispered into my ear. “Fuck, you smell so good.”

  Lucas brought his hand under my chin and lightly wrapped his fingers around my throat and pulled my head back so that my head could not move. My knees went weak.

  “Do you want me?” he asked with his mouth at my ear. And before I could answer, he ran his tongue up the shell of my ear, much like he did earlier, but this time it held something more to it. “Tell me, Lanie. Do you want me?”

  “I...uh.”

  “Do you remember when I said that you needed your ass spanked?”

  “Y-yes.”

  “I wasn’t fucking around.” As the words left his mouth, he ran his hand around the curve of my ass cheek. He had me squirming, wanting more. I was about to speak when I felt his hand land right on my backside. A moan worked its way up my throat. “I knew you’d like that.”

  “Lanie? Yo, Lanie! Mama wants your ass downstairs for dinner.” My eyes flew open and I practically flew out of Lucas’ hold. “Don’t make me come in there, girl! You and Hoss better get your butts downstairs!”

  Okay. Two interruptions. I knew when God was communicating with me. That was definitely one of those times. I was hornier than I’d ever been, and, yes, it was over my freaking best-friend…but giving into that desire would be a huge mistake.

  Huge one.

  I had to end it before it went any further. I had to.

  If I lost Sparky in my life… “This. Us.” I pointed between both of us. “We can’t, Sparky. Ever.”

  I left the bedroom before Lucas had a chance to touch me again. If he had, I would have probably given in and not cared until later. Much later.

  I repeated it to myself over and over, heading down the hall. I still couldn’t let go of the feelings he inflicted on me. What the hell just happened? I silently asked myself as I made my way down the stairs. However, I did not have time to figure that one out.

  “Oh, Lanie, you’re here!”

  God, her. I internally cringed, fighting the urge to throw myself in front of a bus.

  “Hey, Jasmine,” I said, walking into the living room. I was hoping like hell she wouldn’t want to hug me.

  “Gah!” As soon as Jasmine threw open her arms, I almost crawled out of my skin. “Give me a hug!”

  My mother’s face lit up like a Christmas tree; my lungs, however, felt like they were in a vice as I tried to fight for air. “Can’t...breathe.”

  “I am so darn glad you’re here!” Jasmine said, squeezing me for dear life. “We’re gonna have so much fun.”

  “So...much...fun,” I said slightly wheezing. What the hell was wrong with her? Since when was she so darn happy to see me?

  “Oh. My. God! Can you stand it?” I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to stand. Jasmine pulled back from me and shook me by my arms. What I was certain of was that I could not stand all that damn shaking. “I’m getting married! Can you believe it? Well, of course you can. I mean, it is me getting married, after all. So, did you bring your boyfriend?”

  I watched Jasmine’s brow raise and her eyes scan the living room. She pursed her lips out before a small grin formed in the corner of her mouth.

  She didn’t believe it. Didn’t believe I could have a boyfriend.

  I’d show her. As soon as she saw Sparky, I would so show her.

  “I don’t see anyone here but doofus over there,” Jasmine said, nodding her head toward Willard, who was sitting in a corner recliner eating jerky.

  “Watch your tongue, Jas! Or Mitchell might find his woman with one less tit on your honeymoon.” My brother flipped Jasmine the bird and flinched when he saw
our mother raise her hand—only to stuff her mouth with one of those pink puffy cakes she loved so much. Willard flipped Jasmine one more bird when he realized that he was in the clear, right before yelling out, “Get your ass down here, Hoss! We ain’t waitin’ all damn night! I could eat the ass end of a skunk right now!”

  “Who the hell is Hoss?” Jasmine asked.

  Footfalls landed heavily on the stairs as Lucas made his way down. I sucked in a deep breath because I wasn’t ready to see him after what had happened between us just moments earlier.

  I saw his shoes before I saw the rest of him, but I heard the breath leave Jasmine’s mouth. Apparently she already caught sight of my pretend boyfriend.

  My eyes traveled from her shocked expression and landed on Lucas. His jeans hung low on his hips and the t-shirt he was wearing was a couple inches too small around his biceps. I heard a whimper escape Jasmine as Lucas raised his arms and slowly ran his fingers through his hair.

  There went the sparks, flying out of Jasmine’s vagina. Even as I shuddered at the thought, I had to admit that she wasn’t the only one.

  “Holy hell, who is that?”

  I inwardly smiled when Jasmine gripped my forearm and nearly fell over sideways.

  “Um...my…um boyfriend, Lucas,” I said as butterflies socked me in the gut. The next words that flew out of my mouth shocked even me. “Fine piece of ass, and he’s a machine in the sack.”

  What the hell? Oh my God, I was so gloating!

  “That is not your man,” she deadpanned, looking over at me. When I raised my brows and gave her a cocky grin, Jasmine’s jaw hit the floor. “That’s your man?”

  “Like I said, he’s a fucking machine.” And my smile grew even wider, horrible person that I was.

  I felt Lucas’ eyes on me. His scorching gaze was penetrating and downright lethal. I felt every molecule in my body rise to attention. I was sure that if given the opportunity he’d want to continue where we left off upstairs. It was obvious in the way he was staring at me.

  I couldn’t figure out how things had changed so quickly between us. Did I miss something? Had he always been interested in me and I just never saw it? Was I always kinda interested in him, on a physical level? Maybe he was just trying to get into character.

  And if that was what he was doing, the man should’ve been an actor. That shit was Oscar-worthy.

  Lucas walked up behind me again, making me tense. “Hey, baby.” My eyes automatically closed when I felt his hands slither around my waist and his lips land right under my earlobe. “Mmm...You smell so good. You smell like...you know, earlier. Me.”

  My heart about gave out at his words. But what struck me more was the deep jealousy I felt when I looked at Jasmine and saw a deep blush on her cheeks.

  Bitch.

  “Your fault.” I played along and nuzzled Lucas’ jawline. “I told you we should’ve waited until tonight; when everyone is asleep. And I didn’t even have time to shower, that’s why I smell like you.”

  My mom and brother were in the room, and still, I couldn’t bring myself to care. All that mattered was Jasmine’s reaction. I tried not to laugh in Jasmine’s face when I saw a blush seep in to her cheeks. She looked downright irritated, disgusted.

  For as long as I could remember, Jasmine had always knocked me down a few notches when it came to guys. Every time I was interested in someone, she would find any way to sabotage the potential. She and her friends would make it virtually impossible for me to have any sort of social existence in high school.

  Now? Well now I was going to enjoy the hell out of myself.

  “Oh?” Lucas said, looking in Jasmine’s direction. “Who’s this?”

  Before I could introduce them, Jasmine thrust out her hand. Always the eager beaver.

  “Hi.” Her tone was low and slightly husky and I wondered if she even realized that she nearly sounded like a man. “I’m Jasmine. Or, you can call me Jas. All my close friends call me Jas.”

  I clenched my teeth hard enough that I was surprised that I didn’t crack a few. She was like a bitch in heat. Always.

  “It’s nice to meet you...Jasmine,” Lucas said, emphasizing her name condescendingly. “And you are no doubt the bride. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

  Right there, I had the unmistakable urge to hump his leg for putting the bitch in her place.

  “Oh?” Jasmine blushed a thousand times over. “And what did Miss Lanie tell you?”

  My stomach dropped to the edge of my toenails. If Lucas wanted to keep his balls intact, he’d refrain from telling her the truth.

  A devilish grin poked about Lucas’ face, and I was just about to gut-check him when Willard came to my rescue.

  “He told her the truth. Ya have a damn horse face and ya sucked as a cheerleader!”

  “Screw off, jackass!”

  “Hey, Jasmine, ya see that? It’s my give-a-fuck, and it’s broken!”

  Willard flipped Jasmine a double bird and grabbed his crotch for good measure before he walked out the front door. It didn’t surprise me that those two still had it in for one another. They’d wanted to maim each other since we were children.

  As a dare by her cheer squad, she’d told the entire female population at Silver Springs High that Willard had herpes and an uncircumcised penis. Needless to say, he didn’t get a girlfriend until his senior year.

  “Jasmine, have you apologized to him? Or talked to him, at least?” I asked, knowing damn well that she hadn’t in all these years.

  “For what? If he’s still butt hurt from way back then, then the big, ugly idiot needs to get over it.”

  “Girls,” my mother called out to us in a warning tone. But it wasn’t enough to curb my anger and irritation.

  I felt my blood boil beneath my skin. Vivid, blood splattering visions bounced around my head. I may not have always agreed with my brother but that didn’t matter. Jasmine was out of hand and I wanted to kill her. The bitch was lucky I didn’t back out on her wedding.

  Lucas must have felt my muscles tighten because he ran his hands down my arms, calming me instantly. “Well, Jasmine, it was nice meeting you, but I think Lanie and I are going to grab something to eat. Long flight.”

  In that moment, my whole world shifted and he became my rock.

  I also became scared out of my God damned mind.

  Jasmine’s demeanor changed and she literally upturned her nose on Lucas, which made him laugh into my hair.

  “Fine. But we need to get started early in the morning. Mitchell is having his last fitting for his tux, so that gives us time to get to the bakery.” Jasmine pursed her fat lips. “Don’t be late, Lanie.”

  I nodded my head as Jasmine turned on her heel, nose still stuck in the air. Before she reached the front door, she stopped and gave my mother a hug.

  “Bye, Lottie. I’ll see ya tomorrow.” Jasmine gave my mother a tight squeeze. Just as she placed her hand on the doorknob, she turned around to dig the proverbial knife further into my gut. “Oh, and we need to make sure your dress fits you. Now that I’ve seen you, we might need to get ya a bigger size.”

  The sneering, coldhearted bitch.

  After Jasmine left, we sat down to eat. Dinner was amazing. My mother hadn’t lost her touch in the kitchen. I hadn’t realized how much I missed real country cooking until right then.

  “That was great, Mama,” I said, and bent down behind her to give her a big hug. My emotions got the better of me, and, quietly so only she could hear, I whispered, “I missed you, Mama Lottie.”

  As I held my mother in my arms I felt her chest jerk a few times and I knew she had started crying. I hated being the cause of her tears. My heart broke into a thousand tiny little pieces when I felt the warm wetness land on my arm.

  When I left Silver Springs, I had convinced myself that my leaving was the best thing for me, for my life. I never took into consideration what it would do to my family, my mother. I thought that leaving would solidify me as an adult, not to mention rid me of th
e chaos that is my family. I realized, in that moment of utter clarity, holding my mother, that I had made my decisions based on selfish reasons. Now...now it was time to fix things.

  “Yo, Hoss!”

  Willard’s voice booming from the backyard shook me from my musings. I kissed my mother on the top of the head before heading out to the back with Lucas.

  My brother had been loud since the day he had entered the world. And when he finally understood what mud was and that you could have a whole lot of fun with it, he went balls to the wall when he got his first truck. In other words, he’d always been chaos. One of the craziest in my whole family.

  “It’s fucking pitch black out here,” Lucas said as he held my hand, walking blindly in the dark. “Don’t your parents believe in lights?”

  “You scared...Hoss?” I giggled at his new nickname. “Look. See that glow over there? Willard and his cohorts.”

  My brother loved nothing more than to have his buddies over on a damn near daily basis. My parents never seemed to mind. The only time things ever got out of control was when my grandmother had decided to join them. Needless to say, a couple sips of shine later left her dancing around the fire with her bloomers in full exposure. Good times.

  I was forced to come to a stop when Lucas gripped my hand.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “You look tired, Lanie.” A small smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. “I’ll go see what your brother wants. Go get some sleep.”

  “You sure?”

  “Yeah,” he said, waving his hand dismissively. “I’m a big boy. I can handle your brother. Maybe he wants to show me around.”

  I mentally shook my head because I was sure that Willard had other intentions regarding Lucas, and none of them involved showing him around.

  “Okay, if you insist.” I released his hand and immediately felt the loss of contact. My body screamed for it back. I ignored it with every ounce of my concentration. “Try not to get into any trouble.”

  As I turned to head back up to the house, Lucas’ fingers wrapped around my wrist, stilling me in place.

  “We need to talk about earlier, Lanie.”

  “There’s nothing to talk about.” I shook my head. “It was a...a mistake.”