The Catalyst

by Angela Jardine

  Even so, she still had to get away from him, having by now totally convinced herself she never wanted to see Jimmy Fisher again ... ever.

  Chapter 19

  I am cold, so cold. It’s dark and I'm frightened. Help me! Help me, Jasper!

  Jasper jumped at the anguished words as they came unbidden into his mind. He was sitting in his car, parked in the cliff-top car park near Peryllus Cove, waiting for the sun to rise above the horizon, waiting for daylight. He had been waiting for hours, waiting since he left the hospital, determined to find Jenny before the police did.

  He knew she must be somewhere nearby, he had found her car hidden amongst bushes down a nearby green lane. There had been blood on the steering wheel. He knew she would be down there in the cove, he could feel it. The hairs on the back of his neck rose as he thought of her. The only thing he didn’t know was if she was still alive.

  She must be down there, in their childhood hideaway just below him, frightened and alone in the cold and dark of the cave at the end of the beach. Or she could be already dead, now just a corpse drifting with the tide, her cry in his head just the fantasy of a feverish mind.

  He was desperate to get into the cave to see if she was there but it wasn’t simply a case of climbing down the cliff side. The tide was in and strong and unpredictable currents presently cut the cave off. Within him anxiety warred with common sense until anxiety finally won and he could no longer bear the feelings within him.

  For God’s Sake, his was the blood of pirates and smugglers, of course he could find his way through the water to reach her if she was in the cave. It should be second nature to him. He tried not to think he might have got soft with city living. No, he decided, I’ll be all right, I’ll just take it slowly. For a moment he still hesitated, wondering if he was being watched before shaking his head with a hard laugh at himself. Smuggler’s blood will out, he thought, only this time the watchers would be the police rather than the Revenue men.

  He wondered briefly if the local police were clever enough to have set up surveillance on him suspecting he might know where the prime suspect he had alerted them to could be found. He rather thought they were but still he hoped they had not set anyone on to follow him just yet. Cautiously looking round he strained to peer into the shadows of the small car-park and only when he was absolutely sure he was alone did he leave his car and make for the overgrown path that wound down the cliff to the cove below.

  The clamour in his thoughts got louder as he struggled to find a way down the cliff side. If she had climbed this way before him the vegetation was giving nothing away and he tried not to think she might simply have jumped from the cliff top onto the rocks below. She had to be here, she had to be in the cave. If wishing could make it so, she would be there.

  Slowly, so slowly the sun was creeping over the horizon as he stumbled on rocks and roots still hidden in the shadows. By the time he reached the bottom of the cliff his left knee was aching after a particularly painful altercation with a large boulder and his legs bore the gashes made by the briars he had pushed through but he had made it without falling to his death so maybe Jenny had too.

  ‘Bloody hell!’ He gasped out loud as he took a final step down and felt the bone-chilling coldness of the sea rising up to his knees. The salt water stung the cuts on his legs spitefully as he strained his eyes towards the cave, now faintly visible as a sinister black shadow eaten into the greyness of a sheer cliff-face. It was time to wade towards it, there was no other way to get there.

  He tried to remember what the beach was like. It had been many years since this place had been their special refuge but he found he could still remember the layout of the cove with its tiny crescent of sand, tumbled rocks and deep bank of pebbles at the foot of the cliff

  He felt sure it was possible to wade through the water across the rocks and over the submerged beach to the cave but he still had a healthy respect for the strong currents that would pull at him. The rocks too, hidden beneath the water, could shift and trap his feet. What was even worse, he now remembered, was that the seawater could often make small areas of this beach into a sort of ravenous quicksand.

  The sensible thing to do would be to wait till full daylight and low tide but he knew he would not do the sensible thing, there was no time to do the sensible thing. Suddenly he was aware of another problem and frantically tried to remember if the cave filled up completely with water when the tide came in. If it did and Jenny really was in there ...

  His mind rapidly rejected the thought. He knew he had no option but to wade over to the cave and check if she was in there and, if she was, bring her back with him and hide her somewhere safe. It wasn’t that far to the cave, only the sea and the poor visibility made it difficult.

  Help me, Jasper! I’m frightened!The whispered words inside his head made him move. Jenny was in the cave, he was now sure of it. She needed him and that was all he let himself think about as he moved carefully out into the water. The sea only came up to his knees but it was frighteningly cold and he wondered if he would succumb to hypothermia before he could reach her. Could you get hypothermia if you were only immersed up to the knees, he wondered.

  The question lodged irritatingly in his mind and continued to occupy him until he slipped on seaweed covered rocks and fell headlong into the water. Bollocks! Well, won’t have to worry about only having wet knees now he thought, scrambling frantically to his feet as fast as he could, gasping with the shock and spitting out salt water.

  Moving more carefully after this he felt his way with his feet over the submerged rocks, finding they suddenly gave way to sand and he plunged down until he was up to his thighs in water. His teeth were chattering now and the wind, slight though it was, cut through his clothing with ruthless efficiency as he tried to block out all thoughts of the cold.

  As he had suspected, the receding tide was producing strong undertows that now began to swirl around him, pulling and pushing like playground bullies and he strove to control his rising fear as he waded warily through them towards the cave. Occasionally they pushed him so violently he had to stop and steady himself, trying to plant himself on the sand below to withstand them despite his fear of quicksand.

  As he neared the cave mouth he could hear the change in the sound of the sea as it became a hollow, slapping sound echoing round the vault of the cave. Narrowing his eyes he peered into its dark interior, groping towards the opaque darkness to the left of him until his hand connected with stone and he could feel his way along the rock wall as it curved inwards into the cave.

  Just as he stepped forward into the cave however he immediately felt what he had been dreading, the pull of quicksand sucking greedily at his left foot as it sank into a deep pool against the wall of the cave, rapidly pulling him deeper and deeper down into the water. Terror mounted in him as he struggled to stay upright and pull away from the swallowing sand.

  Frantically, he felt the rock face for some sort of help, hurriedly wedging his left hand into a narrow crevice and gripping a narrow ledge with the fingers of his right. His prompt actions bought him a little time to hold himself still against the relentless pull of the sand and, breathing hard, he momentarily rested his head against the cave wall.

  Fortunately the sand under his right foot still seemed to be relatively solid, though his right leg was bent at the knee as his left leg had been absorbed deep into the quicksand. The sea was lapping halfway up his chest now as he crouched, trapped by his leg and he was frighteningly aware that not only was he freezing cold but he was beginning to weaken as well.

  It was terrifyingly obvious to him that if he couldn’t get out of the situation immediately, he could drown or be totally swallowed by the sand. He needed to use the strength of his right leg straightening itself to pull the left one out, that was if he still had enough strength to do that.

  Trying to hold onto any logical thought processes was now becoming more difficult as the fear of disappearing below the surface of the sand took hold of his m
ind. His imagination wasn't helping in other ways either, beginning to frighten him with lurid pictures of the sort of things that might be lurking in the water, in the quicksand, strange, slimy monsters with tentacles and stings, all waiting to grab and devour him.

  ‘Oh, for Pete's sake, grow up, you big kid!’ he burst out, angry at his inability to control his thoughts. Deep at the back of the cave something stirred. He distinctly heard a slight scrape and a falling pebble and fear made him instantly invent the image of some hideous sea monster. With a sudden strength lent to him by an instant shot of adrenalin, he planted both hands against the cave wall and pushed up with his right leg as hard as he could until the knee locked straight, feeling the gradual releasing of his left foot as he did so.

  He breathed a silent sigh as it continued to ease out of the sand, trying not to pant with exertion in case doing so gave his position away to whatever it was lurked in the cave. Then there was a whisper.

  ‘Jazz? Is that you?’

  His relief was so complete he nearly broke down in tears. It was Jenny, she was here. His intuition had been right all along.

  ‘Yes, Jen ... yes ... it’s me … keep talking so I can find you.’

  ‘I’m cold, Jazz ... I’ve been here ages.’

  ‘Are you in the water?’

  ‘No, I’m on a sort of ledge. I fell asleep and when I woke up it was dark and the tide had come in and I didn’t dare get down into the water in the dark.’

  ‘Don’t worry, I’m nearly with you, sweetheart’, he said wading through the gloom as fast as he dare, his arms outstretched, feeling his way towards the sound of her voice and grateful that so far the floor of the cave seemed to be smooth, firm sand.

  ‘Jazz ... I can’t see!’ he heard her whisper. There was fear in her voice.

  ‘I know, neither can I but the sun is coming up and we’ll soon be out in the light ... we’ll soon get home now I’ve found you.’

  At that moment, as he felt along the back wall of the cave, his hand connected with something soft and springy in the blackness, it was Jenny’s hair. Instantly he gathered her up into his arms and held her tight, sobbing into it.

  ‘Thank God, thank God...’

  ‘I’ve done something, Jazz ... something terrible.’ The anguish in her voice made him want to cry even harder and he gulped hard to regain control of himself.

  ‘I know ... we’ll sort that out once we’re home. Let’s not think about that now,’ he said, desperate not to think about what she had done. ‘Right now we need to get home and get you warm and dry.’

  His eyes were becoming more accustomed to the gloom of the cave as the sun gradually started to light up the cove outside. Slowly he waded back through the water towards the beach, guiding Jenny and delicately feeling his way with his feet, anxious to avoid any further incidents with quicksand.

  Once outside the light was good enough now for him to plough through the sea towards the bottom of the cliff-path with a little more speed and certainty than on his outward journey. Jenny stumbled clumsily behind him but he pulled her on relentlessly, very much aware of his own fast-failing strength and the fact he was becoming colder and colder.

  ‘Jen ... we must hurry.’

  ‘I know … but honestly, I can’t see...’ Her voice seemed muffled behind him.

  ‘I know it’s hard to see in this light ... but we’re not that far away from the car now.’

  Even as he tried to infect his voice with enough enthusiasm to keep her going he was aware the short journey towards the beach seemed interminable.

  Eventually they were stumbling out of the sea and over the rocks towards the bottom of the cliff, gasping for breath as they sank down thankfully onto the grass.

  ‘One last push to the top of the cliff then we’ll soon be home,’ he said, rubbing her arms vigorously, hoping to warm both of them with the action.

  It was a diversionary tactic to stop himself worrying he might not have the stamina left to climb to the top of the cliff. He felt completely sapped of strength and only the need to protect Jenny gave him the willpower to go on. As it was he never knew how he managed to get her up the cliff and into the car.

  His arms still shook with the exertion of pulling her after him as he drove the short way home with the car heater blasting out. He knew the police could pick them up at any moment and he almost wept with relief as he turned onto the farm track with Jenny sitting silently beside him.

  ‘Thank God, we’re home! Oh look, I left the yard light on. I must have left it on when I came out to find you.’

  He glanced at her and smiled but she did not respond.

  ‘I can’t see it...’ she said, flatly.

  ‘There it is ... look, just ahead.’

  ‘I can’t see it ... I can’t see anything. I haven’t been able to see anything since I was in the cave and thought about ... about what I’d done.’ She was crying again now and trembling violently.

  ‘What do you mean? Why can’t you see?’

  He wrenched the car to a halt in the farmyard and turned to look at her. To his relief she looked normal, there was no indication of any injury to her face. He continued to scan her face, trying not to look at the bloodstains on her jumper. Although she stared towards him she seemed to be looking beyond him and with a sickening jolt he knew he was looking at the farseeing stare of the blind.

  ‘Jasper, you don’t understand … I killed Jimmy ... and ... a woman ... a woman in my kitchen. I don’t even know who she was ... I had a knife and it cut her ... there was blood everywhere ... everywhere!’

  He knew by the horror on her face that she was seeing the scene again.

  ‘God ... what have I done! I killed them ... how could I do that? It was wrong ... all wrong … everything went wrong! Is that why I can’t see, Jasper? Am I blind because I did something wicked?’ Putting her hand out in front of her she felt for him, plucking at his sleeve.

  ‘Please, Jasper ... tell me what to do! You’ve got to tell me how to make it right!

  Chapter 20

  Jimmy opened his eyes. At least, he opened one eye. His right eye appeared to be heavily bandaged but he raised a hand anyway to confirm what he already knew. Right, so he really was looking through just the one eye then. His head ached and he felt deathly tired but not too tired to wonder what had happened to his eye, or head, or whatever the hell the reason was for all this bandaging.

  His neck felt stiff and awkward when he tried to move his head to look around but from the little he could see he managed to work out he was on his own in a small hospital room. And judging by the looks of all the serious looking bits of kit about, he reckoned it could just be for people in a very bad way. He puzzled about that, just for a moment, but then all the memories came back with a rush, falling over each other in his mind.

  ‘Sunny!’ he yelled.

  No one responded and he tried to look round for some way of summoning attention. A nurse appeared as he was about to fall out of bed trying to grasp a promising-looking red button that was tantalisingly just out of reach.

  ‘Now then, Mr. Fisher ... where d’you think you’re going? Let’s have you back in bed and take a look at you...’ she said with the gentle ruthlessness of her training as she eased him back into bed and checked his bandaging.

  ‘Sunny ... where is she? She’s not … she’s okay ... right?’ His single eye pleaded to be given favourable information. He could not see her in the room and he wondered if all his panic-stricken fumbling with the tourniquet had been in vain. The memory of his struggle not pass out with pain after Jenny had jabbed at his face with that huge knife was still at the forefront of his brain and he wondered if the paramedics had responded quickly enough to his phone call.

  ‘Yes, she’s fine. You did a grand job ... the response team said she would definitely have died but for your quick thinking. As it is she left in reasonable shape.’

  The nurse smiled down at him reassuringly as she checked the monitors next to him.

 
‘What do you mean ‘left in reasonable shape’? Surely she hasn’t been discharged already?’ He was confused despite his relief.

  ‘Yes, she left earlier this afternoon.’

  ‘Well, how long have I been unconscious? She can’t have been well enough to look after herself? She lost such a lot of blood! You can’t have let her go home!’

  Despite his weakness he felt outraged at such an obvious lack of care but the nurse was made of stern stuff and refused to be browbeaten by him.

  ‘You have been unconscious for a few days, Mr. Fisher. The doctors kept you sedated after the operation. You are very lucky to be...’

  The nurse stopped herself abruptly, feeling she had probably said too much.

  ‘We released Ms Smith safely into the care of her friend ... and her GP was also alerted. He’ll monitor her closely until she recovers fully.’

  But Jimmy had only heard ‘into the care of her friend’.

  ‘What ... friend?’ he said, already knowing, and fearing, the answer.

  ‘Mr. Hervey … they were both most insistent and the duty doctor took the decision to let her go as Mr Hervey would be taking care of her. She really only needs to rest now, as long as there is no problem with her wound, and the doctor felt she would probably recuperate much quicker in familiar surroundings.’

  ‘Oh...’ he wanted to say ‘fuck’ but thought better of it in front of the nurse who was looking over the tops of her glasses and smiling at him like a benign vicar,‘ ... damn!’ he finished, warily watching her. ‘Okay … so when willI be able to go home?’

  He badly needed to see Sunny. He needed to make things right and knew he would have to plead his case with her now. Her leaving so suddenly with Edward Hervey had sent a clear signal to him and he knew he could lose her, might indeed have already lost her.

  Damn Jenny, damn her to hell, the mad, obsessive bitch. He could feel the heat rising in his head and something started to throb painfully.