Providence: On Angels' Wings

by Lauren Wynn

  On the drive home, she leaned over and whispered in my ear, “I can’t wait to be your wife.” And then it began. Excitement spilled out of her. She gushed about finding the perfect dress, which apparently she, Lily, and Taylor found the day after I proposed. I got a quick glimpse of it as her memory of it flashed across her mind: ivory satin, simple, and classy. She talked about how Lily was going to fix her hair. We discussed the bridal party, and I was thankful I had asked Grant and Leo a couple weeks ago because she lit up knowing that my side was taken care of already. We sat on her deck and she spoke for another hour about wedding plans: locations, flowers, colors, food. I became almost mesmerized watching her. Her facial expression conveyed every ounce of her happiness. She waved her hands around this way and that describing different aspects of her perfect day, elated.

  Her father stood staring out the kitchen window at us for a good twenty minutes until I waved for him to come out and join us. I’m unsure if Providence noticed him, though, because she just kept on talking while he sat on the wooden picnic bench next to me.

  I turned my head and whispered to him, “She’s going to be a great teacher, with that much excitement; no child will ever fall asleep in her class.” He laughed and continued listening to her. Even with the large, puffy, dark bags under his eyes, I could tell he was genuinely glad to see her so excited.

  Tonight we are having dinner with Lily and her boyfriend, Falls, the fanny slapper from the rave, as well as, Taylor and her boyfriend Knox, the “hottie” business man, or so I’m told. Providence begged me to let her come to the loft while I got ready, so, of course, after her pouty grin, I had no choice but to accept. I studied while she showered, blow-dried her strawberry-smelling hair, curled it in large, wavy spirals, and applied her makeup. She tried on four different dresses. And while she looked gorgeous in all of them, she was looking for a definitive response. I picked the first one, which Lily confirmed via text. So, while I faced the wall again, she shimmied the first one back on—a little, black, strapless, satin dress that hits mid-thigh— and she mentioned something about an empire waist, but fashion was not something I focused on in angel school and it’s definitely not on the bar exam.

  On the way out of Providence’s house, I glance up at the pitched roof over the upstairs bedroom window, and nod. Gabriel nods back. Lately, every time I leave her house, he’s up there, though I don’t tell her that.

  With less than an hour before our dinner reservations, we head to the loft. Providence rolls down her car window, catching the fresh, honeysuckle-scented air, not the least bit worried about her hair. Fortunately, it doesn’t take me long to get ready because I only have about twenty minutes.

  We race up the stairs. It’s impressive how fast Providence can move in her little, black, sandaled heels. In the bedroom, I kick off the jeans I have worn all day and pull the T-shirt off, leaving it in a heap, inside out, on the bedroom floor. Standing in my red boxers with white snowflakes, I peer into the closet unsure of exactly what I’m looking for. Out of the corner of my eye, I see a pair of eyes peek sideways in through the doorway. A blush rises in her cheeks, but she doesn’t back away. She smiles, leaning her head in farther and her stomach flutters.

  I clear my throat still searching the closet. “What are you smiling about, peeping Prov?” I pull a black T-shirt and lightweight, dark-gray, V-neck sweater from the top shelf.

  She slowly puts one foot into the room. “You. I’ve never…”

  A breath catches in her throat as I turn to face her. Her eyes scan up and down my body. For a moment I feel as though I should be embarrassed, being so exposed, but I’m not.

  “I’ve never seen you…without clothes on before.” She sucks in a deep breath. “You’re striking. I mean, phew!” She waves a hand in front of her face. Heat flows through her veins.

  “You’ve seen me without a shirt on before. This isn’t much different.”

  “But your wings were, well…stealing the show, and now...”

  “Now what?” I ask, pulling the T-shirt over my head.

  She slowly walks over to me, curls her arms around my waist, and hugs me close, “Now the manly you is stealing the show,” she whispers. “I was right about the cute butt.”

  “And here I thought that was specific to the jeans I was wearing. Speaking of…” I step away from her to grab a pair of darker denim jeans from the pile.

  She smiles, watching me slip my legs into the pants. I look into her hazel eyes and get lost in the gold ring that surrounds her pupils. I have spent nearly the entire day with her and my mind flashes forward to the life I will come back to, a life where she will talk nonstop about the things that excite her, she will vent about the things that stress her, and she will laugh and gasp and blush. There is never a dull moment with Providence. She’s funny, even when she doesn’t mean to be. Her rants are humorous and even during times of stress she always comes back to her fun-loving self.

  “The bride-to-be,” Lily shouts to Providence from the restaurant bar. She runs over and embraces her. “Meow! You little tiger, you. Prov, you look hot.”

  “Thanks, babe, so do you,” Providence says, carefully smoothing out the back of Lily’s extremely short, emerald-green, silk dress.

  Lily eyes me as I stand back against the entry wall. She slowly releases Providence and steps toward me. “Providence, is this…”

  “My Zan,” Providence announces, reaching back to me, smiling.

  “Mmm!” Lily circles around me scanning me up and down. “You are yummy,” she whispers in my ear. Providence just smiles and shakes her head.

  “He’s already taken, Lil. Now, bring your fine self over here.” Falls extends a hand to me. “Nice to meet you. It’s Zan, right?”

  I nod. “Nice to meet you as well.” I pause. “We’ve got our hands full with these two, huh?” I place my hand on Providence’s hip.

  “You can say that again. Good thing they’re hot.” Falls winks at Lily.

  “Oh, Falls!” Lily laughs, draping her arms around him. Her dress creeps up on the back side and Falls pats her rear giving it a slight tug back down. “You love me and you know it.” He leans down and kisses her and gives her another thwack on the rear. And I know from Providence that he hasn’t said he loves Lily yet, but he’s definitely smitten.

  “Providence, you look stunning.” Taylor enters the restaurant and gives Providence a hug. “Hi, Zan, nice to see you again!” she exclaims in a cheery voice. Her eyes convey she knows every secret detail of Providence’s and my relationship, which I’m not the least bit surprised about.

  “Zan, this is Knox.”

  I nod and shake his hands.

  “Nice to meet you.”

  “Congratulations, man.” Knox tips his head toward me.

  “Thanks” barely slips out my mouth before Lily yells.

  “Let’s get this party started.” She rushes over to the hostess, who seats us on the outdoor patio at the large, rectangular, glass-top table with the best view of the Ohio River. The small glass candle on the center of the table remains lit despite the light breeze. The evening air is warm, comfortable, even for the girls in their spring dresses. The sky is a deep pink and orange as the sun begins to set over western Cincinnati and the Kentucky hills. The aroma of basil swirls around us. It’s a beautiful evening for an outdoor dinner, particularly at a restaurant with a view as spectacular as this one.

  Lily sits at the end of the table with her legs crossed, as close to Falls as she possibly can without actually sitting on his lap. She twirls her long, blond hair with one hand while the other remains firmly on his thigh. Taylor sits at the other end of the table, wearing a black dress with a deep V-neck and thin shoulder straps. The setting sun pulls out the dark reddish tints in her hair. She and Knox aren’t as overt with their public displays of affection as Lily and Falls are, but he appears to adore her, occasionally brushing fly-away strands of hair out of her face. Providence and I sit on the same side of the table, facing the river. Our ch
airs are scooted together so the arms of them touch. She sits on the edge of her seat, engaged in conversation, using my thigh to balance her weight.

  They all cut up and laugh as if they’ve been friends for ages. Aside from the girls, Knox and Taylor are the only two who have known each other longer than five months. It’s interesting how we mesh and seem to have so much in common. It’s nice to have friends other than Grant and Leo to hang with.

  The waiter takes our drink order. I select a bottled beer. It’s easier to fake drinking when the bottles are dark. When it’s time to order dinner, a hint of panic strikes me. Providence orders a salad and I almost question her since I can feel the roar in her belly begging for dinner, but when it is my turn to order, I quickly glance at the menu until Providence thinks, No meat with bones, how about the halibut?

  “I’ll have the halibut, please. Thank you.” She gives me a wink and I lean over and whisper thank-you in her ear. “No meat with bones?”

  She shakes her head. “I don’t eat meat with bones, too much of a pain.”

  I lean back in the chair, resting my arm on Providence’s, combing my fingers through the hair that lies down her back. The random conversations continue. They talk about top-ten favorite movies, best bands, and where we’re going after dinner. Falls and Knox weave in talk of stocks and work, which I join in on occasion.

  The sun finally sets and the colorful Chinese lanterns mounted overhead light up the outdoor patio, tinting it in reds, yellows, and greens. The waiter serves our meal and I have to confess, the halibut smells wonderful. As everyone else eats and drinks, I cut up my food and shuffle it around the plate, attempting to make it look as though I have eaten some. Providence sneaks big bites here and there. At one point, all eyes are on me, and that’s when I do it. I take my first bite of food. I shove the fork in my mouth, chew, and swallow. Unfortunately, I don’t have any taste buds, so the flavor and the aroma don’t sync, yet it makes Providence’s mouth water.

  She grins a big toothy grin and thinks, Yikes!

  I smile and whisper in her ear, “I have absolutely no idea where that goes. I don’t think I have a stomach.”

  Do you feel okay?

  I nod.

  Good! Since we’re celebrating our engagement, we need to end the evening with a little late-night action, if you know what I mean. She winks twice.

  “Oh, I know what you mean.” I smile and shake my head. No code was needed to decipher what she has in mind.

  Taylor darts her eyes between us curiously, but doesn’t say anything.

  A stirring in the corner draws my attention. I glance over and see Gabriel, glowing and golden, sitting on the balcony ledge in a long, dark trench coat. He gives me a nod and moves toward the door that leads back inside the restaurant. He motions with his golden hand for me to follow. I swallow hard and feel as if I may begin shaking at any moment.

  “Will you excuse me for a minute?” I say, standing up.

  Is everything okay? Are you feeling all right?

  I plaster on a false smile and a nod. She’s concerned.

  Gabriel moves out the front door of the restaurant into a shadowy corner. I follow. When the coast is clear, he appears in his human form, his square jaw appearing significantly more intimidating than I have ever noticed before.

  “Time is ticking, Alexander.” He taps his watchless wrist.

  “What? No! I’ve kept up with my duties.”

  “Alexander, you are spending your evening at dinner, one you cannot eat, may I remind you, and celebrating your engagement to a human. I cannot allow you to stay here much longer.”

  “Gabriel, please. I just need one more week.” I beg. I have to have one more week. Providence has her second week of classes and exams. She needs me here.

  He glares at me with his teal eyes and runs his fingers through his dark-brown, tousled hair. Minutes pass. “Alexander, I do not want to do this…” He enunciates every word in perfect American English very formally, unlike me. My tendency is to cram words together and shift between British and American English without thinking. A product of time, I guess. I spoke with a British intonation long before there was an America.

  “Please. I need this week. I need to see Avery and Summer. Providence needs me.” I lower my head and whisper, “I’m supposed to take my exam this week.”

  “Alexander…this was not His plan for you.”

  I can’t bring my eyes to meet his, “I know.” I hesitate, swallow, and take a deep breath, raising my head with courage. I look Gabriel in the eye, “Give me until Friday.” It’s a stern request.

  “One more week. Then it’s time. Unless, of course, you change your mind.” He pauses. “You can still change your mind, you know.” He gives me a moment to speak, but I don’t. “I can have her reassigned, Alexander.”

  Closing my eyes, I shake my head. “No. I’ll be ready in a week.” I turn and walk back in through the restaurant to our table without looking back. I kiss Providence on the cheek and take my seat. I zone in and out of the conversation, distraught from my encounter with Gabriel. Providence pats my leg and looks at me, worried. Please tell me what’s wrong. She looks deep into my eyes.

  Snaking my arm around her, I kiss her neck and whisper, “Gabriel was here.”

  She gasps.

  “Don’t worry, everything is all right.” I smooth my hand down her hair. “I promise. It’s going to be all right.”

  She closes her eyes and nods. She takes a deep breath, swallows, and blinks back her tears.

  “Providence, is everything all right?” Taylor asks.

  “Yes, fine,” she says with a crack in her voice. “Just…got something in my eye, that’s all.”

  Per Knox’s request, a round of shots show up at the table.

  “To the happy couple.” He holds up the small glass. Providence turns and smiles at me as the shot glasses clink against one another. She gulps down the golden liquor and snatches mine out of my hand.

  “You’re the designated driver,” she says before sucking down another. Burn rises from her stomach up her chest into her throat and she lets out a sigh.

  A thin fog clouds her eyes as the alcohol seeps into her bloodstream. Knox, Falls, and I watch as our buzzing better halves dance, uninhibited, to the three-man band that’s playing in the back corner of the patio. Providence laughs and twirls with her friends, letting the fear that she felt when I told her about Gabriel fall away. They huddle together, whispering and giggling, and through Providence’s thoughts I learn they are talking about Falls. The smirk on his face confirms he knows exactly what they are whispering about. I grin. Apparently, Lily and Falls have rounded the bases for a “home run.” I nod at him, still grinning, which tips off Knox, and he holds up a fist to Falls, knocking knuckles.

  “Nice!” Knox comments.

  Falls raises an eyebrow and nods as if to say, “Yeah, it was.” He says seriously, “Look, I know you and Providence haven’t, don’t… Anyway, I tried to restrain myself, but look at her, man. She’s freaking irresistible.” He points a finger to Lily.

  “No judgment from me, man.” I raise my hands, palms out. “It’s a challenge for us all.”

  “Particularly with these three.” Knox agrees and coughs what sounds remarkably close to the word carwash.

  I open my mouth in a surprised smile. “Laugh it up. You try saying no to that.” I nervously spin my fork on the glass tabletop, still shocked that Providence would tell Lily and Taylor about that.

  “There’s no freakin’ way,” Falls mutters. We all laugh.

  “You are a better man than I,” Knox adds.

  Taylor waltzes over, draping her arms over Knox’s shoulders, and whispers in his ear. “As I was saying… ” He darts his eyes between me and Falls, smiles, and rubs Taylor’s arms.

  “Ooh, ooh,” Lily yells. “Time for dessert.”

  “I’ll order it,” Falls declares.

  “Unless it’s in the form of chocolate cake, I’m out,” Providence says. “I
already have a little buzz and I refuse to pass out in Zan’s lap again.”

  “Again?” Knox inquires, laughing.

  I chuckle. “Yeah, the shots you two were feeding her at the rave…”

  “Ah! Nice, got the knight-in-shining-armor thing goin’ on.” Knox laughs.

  “Something like that.” I wink at Providence as she squeezes onto my lap.

  “Or super-sexy angel,” she whispers in my ear.

  “Feelin’ pretty good there, Prov?” I smile.

  “I feel good, not drunk, thankfully, but good. Well…except… I’m stuffed. Feel this.” She lets her stomach pooch out. “That’s what I get for eating your meal and my salad.”

  I lay my palm on her belly. “Ah, Prov, I’m sorry.”

  “I took one for the team.” She winks and sucks her stomach back in. “Gosh, maybe I’m buzzing more than I thought. I can’t believe I just did that. How embarrassing. You shouldn’t see me like that.”

  “Providence, I love you regardless. And it’s not your buzz. It’s comfort.”

  “I think you’re right about that. I’ve always been so comfortable with you—well, except that morning I woke up in your lap. I was totally mortified.”

  “Ah, didn’t last long, though.”

  “Only because you were so freaking cute, stumbling over your words, trying to tell me you were my…”—she looks around her—“angel,” she whispers.

  “Falls wants to go home now,” Lily announces loudly. “Take advantage of how short my dress is.”

  Falls throws his hand over his heart and bends his knees as if he’s going to fall to the ground. We all laugh.

  “Well … that’s my cue, boys. Gotta put the little lady to bed.” He smirks and raises an eyebrow as Lily pulls him toward the door.

  Knox winks at Taylor and she giggles.