The Crocodile Caper

by A. B. Greenfield

  Khepri whimpered and dug himself deeper into my belly fur. It tickled a bit, but I didn’t blame him. I lowered my middle toward the floor, the better to hide him.

  “Well, this beetle is off the menu,” I told the hoopoe. “His name is Khepri, and he’s under royal protection.”

  “Royal, huh?” The hoopoe looked us over. “Like the Lady Satiah?”

  “Like Pharaoh,” I said. “I’m Pharaoh’s Cat.”

  The bird goggled at me. “Oop-oop! Guess I can’t arrest you then!”

  “You certainly can’t,” Miu told him. “In fact, who gave you the right to arrest anyone? You’re just a hoopoe.”

  The hoopoe looked annoyed. “Is she with you, too?” he asked me.

  “Yes,” I said. “And if you want to keep Pharaoh happy, you’ll show us around.”

  “That is, if you know where you’re going,” Miu put in.

  “Know where I’m going? Oop-oop!” The hoopoe cackled at Miu. “Sister, I was born in the walls here. I know this place like I know my own eggs. And the name’s Hoop. Oop-oop!”

  “Well, I hope you’ll help us out, Hoop-oop-oop,” I said.

  His head feathers rose in annoyance. “No, it’s Hoop. Oop-oop!”

  “That’s what I said,” I told him, a little annoyed myself. “Hoop-oop-oop.”

  “Ra, I think he’s saying his name is Hoop,” Miu murmured. “With no oop-oop.”

  “Then why didn’t he say so?” I wanted to know.

  “Ra, can we please get going?” Khepri mumbled from under my belly.

  Hoop overheard him. “Sure thing, beetle-o!” Bobbing his long beak in my direction, he added, “So where do you want to go?”

  The tantalizing smell of spiced beef reached my nose. “How about the banqueting hall?” I suggested.

  “We were following Lady Satiah,” Miu reminded me.

  “And that’s where she was headed,” I reminded her. “Besides, I’m hungry. I haven’t had a thing since that oxtail.”

  Hoop shot up, spreading his black-and-white wings wide. “Oop-oop! Follow me.”

  * * *

  It turned out I was right, of course. Lady Satiah was already in the banqueting hall, along with her brother and the children. Scenting that fabulous spiced beef again, I scampered out to join them, only to stop in my tracks.

  The floor was covered in crocodiles.

  Painted crocodiles, I mean—but they startled me. More scaly portraits shimmered on the walls and curled around the doorways. It was almost enough to put me off my appetite…though not quite. The place smelled too good for that.

  Ignoring the dubious décor, I surveyed the table. Where was my plate? I couldn’t spot it anywhere, even when I jumped onto a high ledge for a better view.

  Miu came with me. “What a feast!” she said, judging the table with her kitchen cat’s eye. “The cooks must have been busy since dawn. It’s a meal fit for a pharaoh.”

  “Probably because that’s who Lady Satiah was planning it for.” Khepri peered out from my belly fur. “No wonder she looks so annoyed. Half the food will go uneaten.”

  “Not if I have anything to do with it,” I muttered.

  I arranged myself in my finest Bastet pose, ready for a servant to bring me my share. I waited, and I waited. But to my horror, no one came.

  “Royal or not, it looks like you’re going to go hungry, oop-oop!” Hoop chuckled from an alcove above. “Better take another look at that beetle you’re carrying. He could be just the nibble you need.”

  “Knock it off,” I said. “I told you. He’s my friend.”

  “Right,” Hoop said. “I forgot. Oop-oop!”

  Khepri ducked down into my fur again. As he did, my stomach growled. I needed food now. It was undignified for Pharaoh’s Cat to have to beg for his supper, but I was desperate. I nuzzled up to Kiya and meowed.

  “Oh, poor Ra-baby! Didn’t they bring you any food?” Kiya picked up a cube of spiced beef from her plate. “Here, you can have this.”

  Before I could take it, Lady Satiah shooed me away. “There are fish scraps at the zoo for your cats,” she said coldly to Kiya.

  Fish scraps! For Pharaoh’s Cat! I almost retched.

  Kiya looked sick, too. “Ra can’t eat fish, Lady Satiah. They’re unclean. Everyone in Pharaoh’s court knows that.”

  “He’s not a member of the royal family. He’s a cat.” Lady Satiah said cat as if it were dung. “If he’s hungry enough, he’ll eat anything.”

  What an insult! I retreated to the ledge where Miu sat.

  “Outrageous!” I whispered. “I’m a royal, born and bred. And we don’t eat fish.”

  “Well, kitchen cats aren’t fussy,” Miu said. “And I’m getting hungry. I wouldn’t mind eating some fish at the zoo.”

  “I need a snack, too,” Khepri put in. “And the zoo works for me.”

  “We should wait a bit,” Miu said to Khepri. “I don’t want to leave the children alone with Ra.”

  “What are you talking about?” I said. “I’m their guardian. It’s Lady Satiah you should be worrying about. And maybe that brother of hers.”

  “I’m just saying that you aren’t as vigilant as you could be,” Miu said to me. “Like today on the boat.”

  “One tiny nap,” I said indignantly, “and you—”

  “Tiny!” Miu repeated. “Ra, it was hours.”

  “And even a tiny nap could be a problem,” Khepri told me. “Miu’s right. You never know when something is going to happen, so you need to—”

  “A lion!” Hoop screamed, feathers aflutter. “Oop-oop! Prepare to be eaten alive!”

  CHAPTER 6

  Lion on the Loose!

  I thought Hoop was kidding, but there really was a lion on the loose. He was only a cub, but he was fast. He sped through the banqueting hall, skidding on the tiles.

  “Grab him!” Lady Satiah shouted at her servants.

  The servants didn’t exactly leap to the task.

  “Whee!” The cub dashed past them, then glanced up at Miu and me. Under a mischievous tuft of hair, his eyes were bright. “Hey, cats! You want to play, too?”

  Play with a lion cub? “Thanks, but we’ll pass,” I called out.

  Luckily, the Keeper of the Zoo was on the cub’s trail. Behind him were two men, armed with giant nets. One was tall, long-faced, and sniffly. The other was stocky and red-nosed.

  “Sorry, my lady!” the Keeper puffed. “We’ll have him out of here in a jiffy.” He called out to the sniffly man. “Hormin, you approach from the left.” Nodding at the red-nosed man, he added, “And Qen, you approach from the right.”

  Sniffly Hormin moved the fastest, but it was red-nosed Qen who netted the cub just before he reached the table. As the men carried their prize off, Lady Satiah snarled at them, “Don’t let it happen again.”

  “Of course not, my lady.” The Keeper bowed, then scooted after the cub.

  Lady Satiah didn’t cheer up after the cub was gone. She stared at her plate as her brother told long-winded tales about his military exploits.

  “What a bore!” Hoop whistled. “That’s General Wegaf. Made so many blunders in Nubia that he was dismissed. No surprises there. He can barely lead the way to dinner.”

  A servant came up to Lady Satiah and whispered in her ear.

  “Oop-oop!” Hoop was still jeering at General Wegaf.

  “What’s that servant saying?” Khepri asked me.

  “I can’t hear.” I glared at Hoop.

  “Shhh!” Miu sat up on her haunches. “Pay attention, everyone. They’re getting up. We’d better follow.”

  “Let’s grab a snack first,” I said, leaping for the table. But I’d hardly sampled Lady Satiah’s leftovers when she said something that made me choke.

  “The servants who came with you have fallen ill,”
she told Kiya and Dedi. “It must have been something they ate on the boat. They have been put in the sickroom. Never fear: my own servants will attend you.”

  “I don’t like the sound of that,” Khepri said.

  I didn’t, either. I leaped down from the table.

  “You must give me your valuables,” Lady Satiah ordered the children. She surveyed the considerable amount of gold, silver, and jewels that Kiya and Dedi were wearing. “You may keep your amulets, of course. I wouldn’t want to deprive you of their protection. But your rings and cuffs and everything else must go into safekeeping for the night.” She turned to an older man with a bald head and a pristine white tunic. “Steward, collect them in that basket over there. Then bring them to my bedroom for safekeeping.”

  “Safekeeping?” Hoop hooted. “Oop-oop! I bet those jewels will spend the night on Lady Satiah herself. That lady loves a bauble.”

  Kiya and Dedi couldn’t understand a word of this, of course, and they were used to servants looking after their jewelry. Nevertheless, they were slow to hand their jewels over. But it was only when Lady Satiah sent them to their rooms that Kiya kicked up a fuss. “I want to stay with my brother.”

  “This is my palace, and you will sleep in the ladies’ quarters,” Lady Satiah said. “Now it’s time for bed for you both, and for Ahmose, too. Come with me, Kiya. Dedi and Ahmose, you will go with Turo.”

  She directed Dedi toward a young man with tousled hair, who smiled and bowed to Dedi. “Most gracious son of the Ruler of Rulers, I am Ahmose’s tutor. Please follow me to your room.”

  “That Turo’s a charmer, eh? Oop-oop!” Hoop chortled. “Shame he’s got no gold. He’ll spend his life serving Lady Satiah.” He wheeled up to the ceiling. “Oh, well, time for me to catch some z’s, too. See you later! Or not. Oop-oop!”

  As the children headed off in different directions, Miu said, “We need to split forces. You two go with Kiya, and I’ll go with Dedi.”

  “Oh, no,” I said. I wasn’t going to play dress-up all night. “You go with Kiya, and we’ll go with Dedi.” With Khepri clinging to my fur, I darted after Dedi.

  “Stay alert!” Miu called after us. “He’s the crown prince, remember. Don’t let anyone pull any tricks on you.”

  “As if someone could!” I grumbled to Khepri as we followed Dedi to a bedroom near the great hall. “Miu seems to forget that I’m Pharaoh’s Cat.”

  After Turo said good night, Dedi bedded down. Moonlight poured through a high window, revealing his worried face. I curled up next to his head.

  “I hate it here,” he told me. “I wish we were home. I’d go right now if I could…”

  He yawned and turned over. I yawned, too.

  “Don’t get sleepy, Ra,” Khepri warned from between my ears. “We’ve got a job to do.”

  “And I’m on it,” I told him. “No matter how tired I am. Or how hungry.”

  “How can you be hungry?” Khepri asked. “You just ate.”

  “A mere smidgen, that’s all I had,” I told him. “I couldn’t begin to do the meal justice. Really, it’s agony thinking of it going to waste.”

  “Like that zoo,” Khepri mused.

  “What zoo?”

  “The one here,” Khepri said wistfully. “Think of the dung they must have, Ra. Crocodile. Lion. Antelope, maybe. Or gazelle. Could be ostrich, even. It’s just lying there, with no one to eat it.”

  “Yuck!” I put my paws over my ears. “It’s bad enough being hungry, Khepri. Don’t make me sick, too.”

  The trouble with putting your paws over your ears is that they muffle everything. And when it’s dark and things are muffled, you can easily fall asleep. Which is what I did.

  I guess Khepri did, too. Because the next thing we knew, it was morning, and Kiya was in the doorway, wailing, “Dedi’s gone. He’s disappeared!”

  CHAPTER 7

  Nightmare

  Khepri and I stared at each other in dismay.

  Miu bounded into the room behind Kiya. “Where is Dedi? Kiya dreamed that somebody kidnapped him, and she was so worried that it worried me. Please tell me nothing happened.”

  “Er…not as far as we know,” I said.

  Miu took a step back. “Oh, no. Don’t tell me you both fell asleep!”

  “Okay.” I looked down at my paws. “We won’t tell you.”

  “But that’s what happened,” Khepri said softly.

  Miu closed her eyes.

  “Let’s not overreact,” I said. “Maybe Dedi just got up early.”

  “He didn’t,” Miu said tightly. “Kiya asked the Steward. No one’s seen him. They thought he was sleeping.”

  I felt a prickle of panic. Had something actually happened to Dedi—on my watch? The thought was so awful that I pushed it away. “Look, I’m sure he’s around somewhere.”

  Kiya’s wails grew louder.

  “What is all this racket?” Lady Satiah appeared in the doorway, her wig askew and one lip redder than the other.

  A tiny woman scampered after her, a paintbrush in her hand. “My lady, if I could finish your mouth…”

  “Who’s that?” Khepri asked me.

  “Must be a Painter of Her Mouth.” I watched as the tiny woman darted toward Lady Satiah’s lips with the brush. She squeaked in alarm as Lady Satiah swatted the brush away. “They do makeup for rich ladies.”

  Lady Satiah strode over to Kiya. “Your brother isn’t here, you say? Well, stop bellyaching and go find him.”

  “I’ve looked.” Kiya’s tears welled up again. “He’s gone. I had a dream that someone kidnapped him, and it came true.”

  “Nonsense,” Lady Satiah said. “No one gets kidnapped in my palace. I would never permit it.”

  “Then where is he?” Kiya asked.

  “We’ll find out.” Lady Satiah whirled around so fast that her wig slid over her eyebrows. With another squeak, the Painter jumped to straighten it.

  “Steward!” Lady Satiah shouted.

  The Steward appeared, rubbing at his just-shaved chin. His tunic was as perfectly white as Lady Satiah’s own. “You called, my lady?”

  “When did you last see the crown prince?” Lady Satiah demanded.

  “I haven’t seen him since last night, my lady.”

  “That’s what everyone says.” Kiya sounded desperate. “I asked people to help me find Dedi when I got up, because I didn’t know where his room was. Everyone said he must be here. But he’s not.”

  Frowning, Lady Satiah sat down on Dedi’s rumpled bed. The Painter dashed over and painted her lower lip. When the brushwork was finished, Lady Satiah said, “It’s probably some schoolboy joke.”

  “No, it’s not,” insisted Kiya. “He’s in trouble. Somebody’s captured him. That’s what my dream told me. “When Lady Satiah didn’t respond, Kiya’s voice went up a notch. “You have to do something, Lady Satiah. You have to help me find him.”

  Lady Satiah gave her a cool look—like the look cats give to humans when they try to boss us around. But Kiya stood her ground. She was Pharaoh’s daughter, after all.

  After a long moment, Lady Satiah turned to the Steward and said, “Get to the bottom of this. Report to me in the great hall when you find the boy.”

  As she swept out, the Painter and the Steward bustling behind her, I stared at Dedi’s bed.

  “I have a bad feeling about this,” I said.

  “Me too.” Khepri sounded very subdued.

  “Well, don’t let your feelings get in the way of your detective instincts,” Miu warned. “We’re on a case now.”

  “That’s true.” Khepri clicked hard, as if he were pulling himself together.

  I tried to pull myself together, too. “Where do we start?”

  “I’ll stay with Kiya and make sure she’s safe,” Miu said. “You two search the palace. There are lots of pl
aces the humans won’t think to look. Check them all.”

  * * *

  Together, Khepri and I explored every inch of the main living quarters in the palace. Unfortunately, the palace cleaners had already washed the floors that morning.

  Agitated, I stalked around a fancy suite of rooms near Dedi’s bedchamber. “They swept away clues, and they destroyed the scent trails. It’s a deliberate cover-up.”

  “I don’t know, Ra.” Seated by my ears, Khepri sounded doubtful. “More likely, they were just doing their jobs.”

  “It’s a conspiracy,” I insisted. “The whole palace is in on it.”

  “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves,” Khepri said. “We don’t know for sure if Dedi is missing. And even if he is, the servants here are trying hard to find him. Look at those two guys over there.”

  I glanced at the men, who were opening the many decorated chests in the room to make sure Dedi wasn’t inside. One man was tall, long-faced, and sniffly. The other was stocky, with a red nose. They looked familiar.

  “They’re the guys who caught the lion cub last night,” Khepri whispered in my ear. “Remember? Hormin and Qen.”

  Qen yawned and rubbed his red nose. “Up all night guarding the palace, and now this,” he said to Hormin. “We get the worst jobs around here.”

  “There are worse jobs than this,” Hormin said with a sniff. “I should know. I’ve done some of them.”

  “Like what?” Qen wanted to know.

  Hormin’s long face drooped. “Like dung duty at the zoo.”

  “Dung duty sounds pretty bad,” Qen agreed.

  “Actually, it’s my dream job,” Khepri murmured.

  “Next to that, night watchman is a piece of honey cake,” Hormin went on. He levered the lid back onto a huge chest.

  Qen leaned up against the wall and watched Hormin work. “It’s not being night watchman that gets to me. It’s being at her beck and call the rest of the day, too. And she’s not the only one—”