I couldn’t believe how bad he was taking the news. I was sure he wouldn’t be happy when he learned his father’s identity, but I had no idea it was going to be as bad as it was.
“I’m really sorry you’re reacting so badly to this, but there really isn’t anything either one of us can do about. Officer Chance Sparks is your father. See, I didn’t make that up either. You know that I named you after your daddy.”
He wanted to argue with me so bad. He wanted to protest what I was telling him. I could see it on his face.
At the same time, he hesitated because he knew there wasn’t really anything he could argue. I decided to go ahead and put the ball in his court.
“Like I said, I know he probably wasn’t what you envisioned when you pictured your daddy, but it is what it is. What we need to figure out now is what we should do about it.”
“Well, he doesn’t have to know a thing about me, so who says who have to do anything about it? We can just leave everything as it is.”
I guided CJ back to his chair and tried speaking to him in a calming voice.
“Do you really think that’s fair, CJ? Don’t you think he has a right to know that he’s got a son out there?”
“He hasn’t known for ten years, and it hasn’t hurt him one bit. I don’t want him to know about me.”
“You know, if Chance ever figures out the truth on his own, he’ll be heartbroken. Give me one valid reason why I shouldn’t break the news to him.”
“Uh, how about the fact that I can’t stand him, and I’m pretty sure he doesn’t care much for me either,” CJ said as he rolled his eyes.
“Can you really blame him? I doubt the first impression you made on him was very good. I heard you were as disrespectful to him as could be. And as for you not being able to stand him, how can you possibly know that? You don’t know a thing about him. I think getting to know him is exactly what you should think about doing. Do you think I would have been in love with him all those years ago if he wasn’t a nice guy?”
I wasn’t lying to my son. When Chance wasn’t around his boys back in the day, he was amazing. He was so caring and loving, exactly the opposite of what everyone else thought he was.
“Anyway,” I continued. “I know you had to go and meet with him after school today. Did you two get along any better this time around?”
“I don’t know,” he shrugged his shoulders. “I still don’t like him, and he still doesn't like me. I really don’t think it’s a good idea for me to get to know him, momma. I really wish you would just listen to me and not tell him. Please?”
“I’ll tell you what. Since you feel so strongly about this, I’m not going to tell him about you. Hopefully, you’ll come around one day and change your mind. Maybe when that time comes, you can tell him who you are yourself. I feel like it’s important for him to know the truth, but you’re my son, and your happiness is the most important thing to me.”
“Thank you,” he said, looking smug that he’d gotten his way.
“I think there is something else you might want to keep in mind.”
“What’s that?”
“Chance is not a stupid guy. He’s actually one of the smartest people I’ve ever known. I wouldn’t be surprised if he figures everything out on his own.”
“How would he do that, Momma?”
“Well, for starters, you look so much like him. He hasn’t seen it yet, but apparently, the two of you are going to be spending time together so it might click one day. Of course, there’s also your age. He knows when I left, so if he just thinks about it, he’d be able to match up the timeline to figure it out.”
“Is there something you’re not telling me? Did you say something to him when you came and picked me up?”
“I didn’t,” I lied once more. “I’m pretty sure he figures I left here and immediately met someone else. If he believes that, he might not put much thought into it, but there’s still that chance that he’ll put the puzzle pieces together sooner or later.”
“That’s something I don’t want to happen. We have to do whatever we can do to make sure he doesn’t figure any of this out.”
“What do you mean ‘we’?” I asked my son, feeling horrible that I wasn’t being straight with him. “You can’t lump me in there. Not telling him is your decision and your decision alone. I’ll be in big enough trouble for not telling him about you in the first place. I can only give you my word that I won’t tell him anything. As long as that’s what you want, I’ll respect your decision.”
“Yeah, that’s what I want. I don’t want him to know.”
I looked up at my son, thinking I was going to see a cocky look on his face, but I was met with anything but. His bottom lip was shaking, and it was clear that he was doing what he could to prevent crying. I’m sure he was feeling torn on the subject.
Part of him wanted to be so happy because he found out that his father actually existed. On the other hand, he didn’t want to accept the actual identity of his father. He was being stubborn, which was something he definitely got from his father’s side of the finally.
Looking at my son, I had to fight back my own tears as well. I had hoped that he’d want to get to know his father right off the bat, regardless of who he was. It was going to be an uphill battle for Chance.
A couple hours later, I was getting ready for bed when my phone began to ring. I didn’t even have to look at the caller ID to know who it was?
“So did you give our boy the news?” a much too exuberant Chance asked.
“Yeah, I told him.”
“Great, when does he want to let me know I’m his dad?”
“He doesn’t. He asked me not to tell you anything.” I waited for a response but was met with silence coming from the other end of the line. “Chance, you can’t take this personally at all. He needs to have an opportunity to process all of this. I’ll talk to him again tomorrow night. Just don’t treat him any differently when you see him at the station. Call me tomorrow night about this time.”
* * *
Chance
I tried to relax in bed, but I knew there was no way I was going to be getting much sleep that night. I had a mixture of emotions flowing through me. I was sad and pissed off all at the same time. I was harboring so much hatred and anger towards Latrice.
I knew that everything that had happened between us was partly my fault. There were a lot of things I could have done differently ten years earlier. I knew that if I hadn't chosen my boys over my girl back in the day, my life would have turned out much differently.
In some ways, things were just as much my fault as they were hers. Still, she should have reached out long before she did to let me know that I have a child.
I knew that the only way to make things right was for Latrice and me to work together to not only have a relationship with my son but to ensure that he doesn’t have to go the same route that I went. I picked up the phone to call her back.
“What is it Chance?” she said, annoyed that I’d called back so soon.
“I just wanted to thank you for telling him. I think things are all going to work out the way they’re supposed to. The way I see it, you’ve done all you can do. You were honest with CJ and told him about me. I’ll take over from here. It might take me weeks, months, or even years. Hell, if it takes me until my dying breath to get CJ to accept me as his dad, it’ll be worth it.”
I hung up the phone, knowing that I was in for a long, uphill battle.
The next morning, I decided to pay a visit to Latrice after CJ had a chance to get off to school. I didn’t call ahead to let her know I was coming. I knew she wouldn’t think it was a good idea and would do whatever she could to try to get out of it. Being in law enforcement, I know the element of surprise is my biggest ally.
* * *
Latrice
I wasn’t expecting any company, so the doorbell ringing caught me by surprise. I always fear the worse when somebody shows up unannounced, so I held my breath while I lo
oked out of the small window on my front door.
Chance was standing on my porch, the sun shining directly behind him, casting shadows on his tall, muscular frame. He was wearing his uniform, which was tight in the chest, showing off just how solid it was. He looked gorgeous.
I shook as a rush of feelings that would take over any woman looking at this man attempted to take over my body. I took a deep breath and tried to block those thoughts from my mind.
I had to keep reminding myself that whatever Chance and I used to have was in the past, and it needed to stay there. I needed to think straight, but my body going all hormonal on me wasn’t going to help matters.
Besides, it had been ages since I’d sex and I survived. It wouldn’t kill me to go without it for a while longer.
As much as I tried to fight it, I was having a hard time convincing myself. Chance had done something that no other man had been able to do.
He was able to drum up a bunch of feelings that hadn’t been felt for the better part of a decade. As long as it had been, I could still remember exactly what it felt like to run my hands over his chest.
Closing my eyes, I could see his firm stomach rubbing up against mine and could almost feel his hands touching all the sensitive areas that my body had to offer. He was giving me feelings that I didn’t even remember existed.
He knocked again, startling me out of my daydream. I had my hand on the doorknob, but something in my head was telling me not to open the door.
I knew that if I wanted to get through this without doing something I might regret later, I needed to put as much distance between Chance and me as possible. That wasn’t going to be possible, though. Being around him might get to me, but it was something I needed to do for our son.
Taking a deep breath, I slowly opened the front door and was standing face to face with the father of my child. The sexual feelings hit me again from out of nowhere.
“Chance, I wasn’t expecting you. What are you doing here?”
Instead of answering me right away, he flashed that million-dollar smile at me. It was the same smile that caused a small dimple on his left cheek that always made me melt.
His smile made me want to take him by the hand and drag him into my bed. As much as I hoped it wasn’t true, I knew there wasn’t going to be any way for me to see Chance without thinking about crawling into bed next to him.
From out of nowhere, Chance reached out and pulled me into him, wrapping his arms around me.
“I tried to call you at work, but I was told it was your day off,” he told me.
“You tried to call me at work? Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, everything is fine. I thought you and I should probably sit down and have a talk.”
“Isn’t that what we did yesterday? What is it that you want to talk about?” I asked, suddenly feeling flustered and frustrated.
“Well, I had that meeting with my attorney this morning and figured you might want to know how everything went.”
Shit, I’d completely forgotten about his threat to have a meeting with his attorney. I guess I assumed that if I agreed to his little plan, he wouldn’t feel the need to seek out legal counsel.
“Sure, let’s hear it,” I said, taking a step back away from the threshold of the door, allowing him to come inside.
He looked around like he was being taken back to his childhood. “Wow, this place brings back some memories, huh? It looks just like I remembered it all those years ago.”
I agreed, remembering how Chance used to stand right by the door while waiting for me to get ready to go out with him.
I could still picture my father sitting in his favorite chair reading his newspaper while my mom crocheted on the couch next to him.
“I just made a pot of coffee and bought some donuts at the store if you’d like some.”
“Is that a cop joke?” he cracked with a smile. “I’d love some.”
* * *
Chance
Following Latrice down the hallway towards the kitchen, I was convinced that I had the best view in the world. I tried to avert my eyes as to not focus on her perfectly proportioned ass swaying in front of me, but it was no use.
The way it looked in the pair of nylon shorts she was wearing had me reminiscing about what it looked like out of them.
My brain was being taken over by memories of how her ass felt when I took it into my hands to lift her up off the bed while pushing myself inside of her. I could feel myself getting hard at the thought.
I knew I had to get my mind on something else before my excitement became too noticeable. I looked around the house, looking for anything to get the perverted thoughts out of my mind.
I focused on the colors of the walls and the prints on the furniture. The house was never boring. Everything from the woodwork to the wallpaper to the furniture had intricate designs and shapes.
Finally, we made it into the kitchen, and I slid into a chair at the table as quickly as I could, hiding my growing arousal.
I figured the worst was over, but watching her move around in the kitchen only made it more difficult for me to keep my mind off of her. The shorts she wore were snug in all the right places. I could feel myself starting to throb in my pants.
“I’ve only got glazed donuts. Hope that’s okay,” she said as she put a plate and cup of coffee down in front of me.
“That’ll be fine,” I replied.
Maybe I shouldn’t have dropped by like I did. I thought I’d be fine since I’d seen her a couple of times already. What I didn’t take into consideration was the fact that when I’d seen her before, we were in very public places. Now, there wasn’t anyone else around. It was just me and her, all alone.
While my mind should have been only on my son, it was instead busy with thoughts of me throwing her down and taking her right there on the kitchen table. I knew that if Latrice knew what was going through my mind, she might become offended and she might kick me out of her house.
A smile was beginning to spread across my face as I remembered the way things used to be. It made me wonder if one of those encounters we had when her parents were out had been the one that gave her our son.
“What in the world are you smiling about?” she questioned, bringing me back to reality. I had to reposition myself in the chair as there was too much tension pressing up against the zipper of my pants. I don’t know what I was thinking, but I decided to be honest with her.
“I was just thinking about all the times we made love in that bedroom right over there and was wondering if that’s where you got pregnant.”
“I have no clue. It’s not like it would be easy to pinpoint. We were young, and our hormones were going crazy. We were like rabbits. Anyway, what did your attorney have to say?”
I grinned at the way she had changed the subject without actually discussing it at all.
“Well, he said that as long as we both agree with how to handle things, working together is in our best interests. He did tell me that as CJ’s father, I had certain responsibilities that I should have been handling and that I should make sure to compensate you from the time he was born to now, and I agree with him completely.”
“I don’t think that’s true. It’s not like you knew about him and decided to be a deadbeat dad. You just didn’t know. That’s not your fault.”
“It’s not, but what’s important is that I know about him now, and that’s all that matters to me.”
* * *
Latrice
I didn’t want his money and I sure as hell didn’t want him thinking that I came back due to financial need. I also knew that there was no winning when it came to arguing with Chance Sparks, and I didn’t feel like wasting my time.
“I started a college fund for CJ when he was a baby. I need to have it transferred to a local bank, but you can contribute to that if you want to help.”
“There’s got to be another way I can help as well, isn’t there?”
I questioned what he meant. I wasn’
t so sure he was still talking about CJ. Could he possibly be able to tell that I’d been longing for him since I saw him at the station?
Did he know that if he made the right move, I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from doing all the things my sexual cravings were wanting me to do? Once again, I had to remind myself that this was all about CJ.
“That’s the only way I can think of,” I told him. “It’s actually cheaper to live here than it was where I came from. My job pays me very well, and my parents aren’t making me pay them anything for staying here. We’re fine financially, but I appreciate you making sure.”
A rush of relief fell over me when my cell phone started to ring in my purse, pulling me out of the conversation we were in. It was my boss; I could tell from the ring tone I’d assigned to him.
“That’s work. I gotta take that. Give me just a second.”
I had been expecting the call. It was the same call I got every week to let me know what my schedule would be for the week that followed. Even though I knew the call was coming, I was thankful for the timing because it was getting me out of a very sticky situation.
It gave me a chance to get my mind right because that man was stirring up things inside of me that I thought were gone long ago. Just having him close to me made my heart race.
Already stretching the conversation much longer than it had any right to be, I said goodbye and hung up the phone. When I turned around to go back into the kitchen, I ran right into Chance’s muscular chest, causing me to scream in surprise.
“Damn, I didn’t mean to frighten you,” he said as he reached out and put his arms around me, making sure I didn’t fall as I jumped back.
“I didn’t realize you were there,” I told him, taking a step away from him as he released me. “I thought you were still in the kitchen.”
“Sorry about that. I just thought I would let you know that I had to get going.”
That sounded like a great idea to me. At the same time, there was a part of me that didn’t want him to go. I knew I needed to get the desire that was racing through my body under control before I did something stupid. When I saw that Chance was fixating his eyes on my mouth, I became anxious.
Second Chance (A Secret Baby Romance Novel) Page 7
