Always You

by Denise Grover Swank

  He gave her a smirk. “Like I said, she’s the mother of one of Ethan’s teammates. Ethan’s new best friend.”

  “Toby?” she asked in surprise.

  “You know about Toby?”

  “Ethan’s mentioned him a time or two when I’ve picked him up after school. I also know Toby doesn’t have a father in the picture.”

  “Mom.” She knew more about Toby than he liked but not enough to make the connection…yet. Obviously, the best course of action was to change the subject. “Abby canceled another call with Ethan.”

  “She’s so busy with school.” When he didn’t answer, she continued, “This is why he’s with us and not with her. Not because she doesn’t want him, but because she’s trying to make a better life for the both of them.”

  “I know. I know,” he said in frustration. “And I fully supported her going to med school—still do—but I’m dealing with a very disappointed little boy. I thought things were getting better, but now I’m not so sure. I’m worried I’m screwing it all up.”

  She gave him a soft grin. “Welcome to parenthood. We spend ninety-nine point nine percent of the time worried we’re screwing it up. The fact you’re worried about it means you’re probably doing it right.”

  He wasn’t so sure about that, but he was still stuck on her welcoming him to parenthood. He was playing at parenthood with Ethan, making him want it even more than he’d expected.

  His mother was silent for several moments. “I’ve been thinking about something else that’s a bit…difficult to broach.”

  “What?”

  “Ethan’s stayed with you since Roger and I went on our cruise. Are you happy with the arrangement? He seems happier with you.”

  Matt’s gut tightened. “Are you saying you want him back?”

  “No. Not unless you’re unhappy.”

  He pushed out a sigh of relief. “I’m not. I love having him.”

  She smiled again. “Good. I think you’re both good for each other. I’m asking because I have a friend who is raising her grandkids and her daughter is giving her temporary guardianship. We don’t have anything formal with Abby, and if Ethan got hurt and had to go to the hospital…I just think we should have something legal set up. And if he’s living with you, that would mean you would get guardianship.”

  Holy shit.

  “It’s a lot to think about,” she said. “A lot of responsibility. Take some time to think about it.”

  “No,” Matt said with a shake of his head. “I don’t need time to think about it. I love Ethan and love having him in my life. I’ll do it.”

  She pulled him into a hug. “You’re a good man, Matt. I’m proud of you.”

  Matt felt guilty that his reasons for accepting Ethan’s guardianship weren’t entirely altruistic.

  His mother leaned back with an ornery grin. “Now that that’s settled, tell me more about Toby’s mother.”

  * * *

  The policeman determined that whoever had broken into Matt’s mother’s back window hadn’t taken anything. Nothing in the house was missing, but he had a crew come out and dust for prints in an effort to figure out who’d broken in.

  Matt stayed until after the policeman drove away an hour later, then he cleaned up the glass and placed it in his mother’s trash can.

  “Thanks for helping, Matt. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

  He kissed his mother on the cheek. “Good thing you’ll never have to find out. I’m not going anywhere and neither are you.” He headed for the front door. “I’m going to go pick up Ethan, but I think you should come stay with me tonight.”

  She waved him off with a chuckle as she followed him out to his truck. “I’ll be fine. It was probably some kids causing mischief.”

  That didn’t make him feel any better. What if someone tried to break in at night while she was here all alone? “Mom. I think you should reconsider.”

  “I’m fine. I have an alarm and I think I’m going to install some cameras like that nice officer suggested.” She grinned. “For the record, I’m letting you off the hook with details about Toby’s mother,” she said. “But I’ll expect a report the next time I see you.”

  At least he had some warning.

  “Call me if you need me, Mom,” he said, resting his hands on her shoulders and looking down into her face. “I mean it.”

  “You worry too much.” She reached up on her tip-toes and kissed his cheek. “I love you, Matt. Don’t shut out good things.”

  “What does that mean?”

  She’d already headed back into the house, but lifted her hand and waved as she walked through the door.

  Chuck E. Cheese was a fifteen-minute drive away, which unfortunately gave him time to think. What had his mother meant about shutting out good things? He embraced the good things in his life. Look at Ethan. He could have grumbled and complained when he’d started watching the boy, but he loved having him around. He’d taken over his father’s construction business, convinced his best friend, Kevin, to come be his CFO—and when Kevin promptly discovered the previous bookkeeper had embezzled, had Matt complained? No. He’d rolled up his sleeves and figured out a way to keep the company afloat. And now with Kevin’s help, his company had turned a corner and they were close to making a profit again.

  He turned off the highway and headed toward Chuck E. Cheese, going over his interaction with Anna when she’d come back to pick up Toby. What had she wanted to talk about? He’d seen her checking him out when he put Ethan’s booster seat in the car. Did she want to get back together? Like he was crazy enough to jump back on that train.

  Matt, Kevin, and Tyler had been right back in June when they’d all decided they’d spent their entire dating life with crazy women. Matt had had his share of them, and Anna was right there in the middle of them. What woman tells her boyfriend during his proposal that she doesn’t want to get married and have kids ever, after she’s spent the last six months mentioning getting married and starting a family?

  Crazy.

  Which meant he’d be absolutely insane to consider starting something up with her again. And yet he had to admit, she didn’t seem all that crazy.

  When he walked into the restaurant, he told the girl manning the roped entrance that he was picking up his nephew. After he pointed him out, she stamped his hand and let him in.

  Anna was standing next to both boys by a skee ball machine. Ethan was rolling a ball up the ramp as she coached him, wearing a warm smile so bright it stunned him.

  She was gorgeous.

  Motherhood had made her curvier, and that just added to her beauty. She moved behind Ethan and grabbed his arm, swinging it back and moving it forward, giving Matt a nice view of her ass, proving that her added curves made her look even better in jeans.

  No. He could not go there.

  He stopped about six feet behind them and asked, “How’s it going?”

  “I’m playing skeeter ball, Uncle Matt!” Ethan exclaimed as he turned around to face him. He held a wooden ball in his hand, and Matt struggled to keep his gaze on Ethan’s face and away from Anna’s ass.

  Focus.

  “I see that,” Matt said with a grin. “And getting lessons, too.”

  “Anna says I have a hook when I swing my arm, but I told her I’m not fishing.”

  Matt laughed. “No, you’re not, but she’s right. I saw you roll the last ball as I was getting my hand stamped. Your ball rolled to the left.”

  “You know how to play skeeter ball, Uncle Matt?” Ethan asked in awe. “You know how to do everything.”

  He grinned. “Not quite, but Mrs. Robins seems to be doing a good job teaching you. I’ll just watch.” He crossed his arms over his chest and finally lifted his gaze to hers.

  Holy Mother of God.

  The way she was looking at him—a mixture of warmth and fire, friendliness and longing—he was ready to say fuck it all and walk over and kiss her.

  What was he thinking? No! This was crazy.

>   He broke his gaze and confusion set in. What was he doing? This woman had crushed his heart. Was he really going to consider letting her off the hook?

  “Anna, Uncle Matt,” Ethan said insistently.

  He blinked. “What?”

  “She says to call her Anna. Or Miss Anna, but she says not to call her Mrs. Robins.”

  “Why not?” he asked, sounding crankier than he’d intended.

  “Because she says she’s not a dragon.”

  “What?” He lifted his gaze to Anna’s.

  She gave him a soft smile. “Mrs. Robins is my ex-husband’s mother’s name. A truly horrifying woman that reminds me of a fire-breathing dragon.” She leaned over and tickled Ethan’s stomach.

  The boy broke into giggles then she spun and tickled Toby next, who joined in.

  Anna was bent over and laughing with them, but Matt’s gut seized. This was how he’d pictured her with their own kids. Instead, she’d broken up with him and married some other man. Matt had offered her something wonderful and she’d thrown it away to marry a jerk who couldn’t be bothered to raise his kid. It felt like a slap in the face.

  He glanced down at Ethan, trying not to turn too serious and ruin his nephew’s fun. “You can call a grown-up by their first name if they give you permission, but otherwise you have to call them by their last name.”

  “So does Toby have to call you Mr. Osborn?” Ethan asked, sounding confused.

  “No. Toby can keep calling me Coach Matt. Or just Matt.” He ruffled the boy’s hair. “Go ahead with your lesson,” Matt said although he couldn’t look Anna in the face.

  “Come play with us, Uncle Matt!” Ethan said, grabbing his hand.

  Toby’s face lit up with excitement. “Yeah, come play!”

  Matt shot a glance to Anna, much too tempted to join them. “No, thanks. I’ll just watch.”

  “Please?” Ethan asked.

  “I don’t have any tokens.”

  Anna gave him a hesitant smile and shook her red cup, setting off a loud jangling sound. “We’ve got plenty.”

  His gaze held hers, his irritation seeping through. “I said no.”

  Anna’s previously buoyant attitude deflated and Ethan’s smile fell.

  “If you’d like to leave…” she said softly and that pissed him off, too.

  Dammit. Why’d he have to go and ruin Ethan’s fun with his surliness? “No. Ethan’s enjoying himself. I’m going to get a beer.” Without waiting for an answer, he turned on his heels and headed toward the counter. It was only after he was walking back toward them with his beer in hand that he realized he’d just prolonged his agony. He should have accepted Anna’s offer to leave, yet when he saw how much fun the boys were having, he wasn’t sorry he let Ethan stay. And they were having fun again. His departure had lightened the mood.

  Anna was showing them how to roll the ball but she was putting her own spin on it—literally—spinning around in a circle then rolling the ball and accidentally rolling it into the machine next to the one they were playing on. Both boys started giggling and Anna laughed, too, her cheeks turning pink with her merriment. Ethan turned and caught Matt’s dark gaze, and the boy’s smile fell.

  Jesus. When had he become a fun sucker?

  Matt forced a big smile and waved, feeling better when Ethan grinned and waved back.

  His phone rang and he pulled it out of his pocket, surprised to see Tyler’s name on the screen. “I thought you and Lanie were in Atlanta this weekend.”

  “Lanie came down with the stomach flu.”

  “Yikes. So you’re looking for a place to stay?”

  “What?” Tyler asked in surprise. “Why would I do that? Who would take care of Lanie?”

  “You’re cleaning up vomit?”

  “Lanie happens to be a grown ass woman who can make it to the toilet. Sounds like you’ve been hanging out with a certain five-year-old. Which means you need a night out. Why don’t you come hang out with me in Westport? I’m calling Kevin next.”

  “I thought you said you were taking care of Lanie.”

  “She said I’m hovering too much and is kicking me out tonight.”

  “Can’t make it. Mom’s got plans with her boyfriend tonight and can’t watch Ethan. In fact, there’s something I’d like to talk to you about.”

  “Yeah, sure,” Tyler said in surprise.

  “Since Ethan’s been staying with me, Mom thinks I should get temporary guardianship of him.”

  “Do you think Abby will go for it?”

  That was the glitch in all of this. She’d confessed that she felt like a failure as a mother for leaving her son to pursue her dream. She might not agree for that reason alone. “If it’s presented the right way—as in this is a temporary situation.”

  “Is it a temporary situation? She’s in her first year of med school. She has three more years, then a residency with lots of on-call hours…”

  “I’ll be here for Ethan as long as he needs me.”

  “Are you ready for that? Raising a kid is a huge responsibility. Hell, I’m not ready for that, and I’m married.”

  Matt’s defensiveness rose. “News flash: I have been raising him. I’ve been taking care of him for the past three months. Hell, he’s been with me every night of the last month with the exception of a few nights. We’re just making it legal.” His voice lowered as he glanced over at his nephew. “Besides, we both know this was what I always wanted—a family with kids of my own.”

  “But he’s not your kid. He’s Abby’s.”

  “But Abby can’t raise him right now, and I’m more than willing to. I don’t care if he’s mine or not. Besides”—he took a breath—“I think it’s time to accept that I’m not getting a family the traditional way. Maybe this is how it’s supposed to be. And I’m okay with that.”

  Tyler was silent for several seconds. “Okay. I support you one hundred percent, but I suspect you need to talk to a family attorney.”

  “You can’t help me?”

  “No, but I know the perfect person, well, couple actually. Kevin knows them, too. Remember Blair Hansen? Kevin’s sister’s best friend? She’s an attorney now and in a practice with her new husband, Garrett. I’m sure she’ll talk to you.”

  Matt felt like he was trying to pull a fast one on his sister, but his mother had assured him that she’d talk to Abby. “Okay.”

  “Good. Now that’s out of the way, how about we do something with the kid? I can see if my brother Eric wants to come.”

  “Isn’t Eric seventeen? He’s not going to want to hang out with a five-year-old.”

  “He won’t care. He likes kids. And as long as we don’t go to Chuck E. Cheese, we’re both good.”

  “No worries there,” Matt said as he took a long drag of his beer. “I’m already in the rat’s hell.”

  “You’re at Chuck E. Cheese? Is Ethan at a birthday party?”

  Matt hesitated. He hadn’t told anyone that Anna was back and he wasn’t sure how Tyler would react, but he was tired of keeping it a secret. “No, he’s here with a friend. Why he’s here is a long story which involves my mother and her home security system, but the bottom line is that he’s here with his new best friend, Toby, and his mother.”

  “Is she single?” Tyler teased.

  “As a matter of fact, yes.”

  “Is she hot?”

  “You have no idea.”

  “So ask her out. What are you waiting for?”

  “Her son is British.”

  “Since when did you start discriminating against British people? Wait. He’s British, but she’s not?”

  “No. Actually, she’s from Blue Springs and you know her…or knew her. Before she moved to London right after our college graduation.”

  “No.” Tyler sounded horrified.

  “Yes.”

  “How the fuck did this happen?”

  “It’s a long story I’m not getting into over the phone.”

  “But you’re seeing her?”

 
“If you call noticing her on the sidelines at soccer practice seeing her. Or barely talking to her when she dropped her son off at my house this afternoon for a playdate seeing her.”

  “What?”

  Matt groaned then decided to give him the condensed version. “I told you—her son, Toby, and Ethan are best friends, and he happens to be on my soccer team. I had no idea he was Anna’s son. But Toby’s shy and was scared about playing in a game, and Ethan promised Toby I’d help him. So I set up the playdate.” He paused. “Look, Toby…he’s a good kid. And Ethan really likes him. Why should they suffer because Toby’s mother was a bitch twelve years ago?”

  “You’re a better man than me.”

  “I’m not so sure about that. But I really love Ethan. We’re here now because Mom had her security issue and I didn’t have anyone to watch him. Anna had come to pick up Toby so she offered to watch Ethan and brought them to Chuck E. Cheese.”

  “And you’re there with them.” He paused. “Nope. I don’t see a frozen winter land outside my window. I don’t think hell’s frozen over.”

  “Very funny.”

  “So what’s the plan? Are you going to ask her out?”

  “And let her destroy me again? I don’t think so.”

  “How is it? Is she nice? Hateful?”

  “She’s bending over backwards to make this easy for me. It’s almost worse than if she were a bitch.”

  “At least if she was a bitch, you wouldn’t want to start something with her again.”

  “Exactly. And I’d like to add that you’re usually the more emotionally obtuse one of the three of us.”

  “What can I say?” he said in a sly tone. “Lanie’s changed me.”

  She had. Just like Holly had changed Kevin. And Matt would be lying if he said he wasn’t jealous of what they had. “So if you want to hang out, how about we grill at my house again? I’ll grab some steaks on the way home. Let’s say six thirty?”

  “Sounds good. I’ll call Eric and Kevin.”

  Matt hung up and looked at the time on his phone, surprised it was almost five thirty. He hated to be the killjoy any more than he had been, but he hoped Ethan would be more willing to leave if he found out that Kevin and Tyler were coming over.