Beyond Resistance (The Ransom Series)

by A. T. Douglas

  Lily and I have been officially dating for over a month now. We don’t need excuses like renovations or bucket lists to spend time together. I’m over at her place almost every day of the week, regardless of whether Lily needs time to work on her column for the paper. Since inadvertently spilling the beans to me about her side job, Lily doesn’t hide her writing time from me anymore. She’s even let me read some of her past works that are stacked away in disorderly piles in her office. I’ve tried to balance giving her the space she needs and being there to support her when she’s facing a deadline.

  Today is a particularly special day that I’m spending with Lily. For the first time in my life, I’m celebrating the birthday of someone outside of my family. I’m used to these celebrations being happy but subdued. My parents’ frugality in stretching out their money as much as possible made for simple birthdays. A big cake was a must, but gifts were small and few in number. We celebrated at home, just the three of us like it always was. When I was a kid, it was more than enough, but as I got older and more rebellious, I selfishly wanted more. It wasn’t until my parents told me the full truth of our family’s history when I was a teenager that my attitude completely changed. I insisted on no gifts after that. I even resisted the idea of birthday cake, though I never won that battle against my mom.

  For my twenty-second birthday a week ago, Lily insisted on making a big deal of it. We marked another event off my bucket list that day, spending our time doing social things that are completely normal for people our age but way outside of anything I’ve ever done before. Lily started out small, reserving half the day for us to do couple things like catching a movie and getting some bowling in before the real madness of the day began. She made an event out of it, inviting her friends from college to go bar hopping with us before dancing the night away at a local nightclub. It was a completely overwhelming experience for me, but by the end of the night, I realized it was easily the best birthday I ever had.

  This is my opportunity to make up for a lifetime of simple birthdays and reciprocate Lily’s incredible birthday celebration for me with something equally as amazing for her birthday. I want nothing more than to take Lily out and do something spectacular for her, but of course what does she want to do?

  Spend a quiet evening at home with me.

  Overall I can’t complain. We’re completely comfortable together within the walls of her house. Any lingering worries I have about the outside world fade away here. We can be ourselves and get completely wrapped up in each other. If I wasn’t still sleeping at home each night, one would think I had moved in with Lily given how much time I spend here with her.

  Of course that’s all about to change tonight. When Lily insisted on spending her birthday at home with me, she also insisted I stay the night for the first time. I jumped at the opportunity, though explaining to my parents that I wouldn’t be home tonight was a bit awkward. They instantly gave me wide-eyed looks that pretty much said without saying that they knew Lily and I were sleeping together.

  Sex with Lily has been life-changing. It’s not just the incredible experience of the intense physical feelings that come with sex, but being connected with her and sharing such intimate experiences with her remind me I’m not alone. When we’re stripped down to our most basic level to let human nature take over and express our feelings and desires through the connection of our bodies, the feelings of isolation and solitude that have plagued me for years are instantly brushed away.

  Just thinking about Lily naked in bed is enough to give me a raging hard on, which is not ideal when trying to teach one’s girlfriend how to make marinara sauce from scratch.

  “You really should go sit down and relax,” I insist, secretly hoping to get Lily out of the kitchen so she doesn’t notice the bulge I’m trying to calm in my shorts. “You’ve already had to work half a shift on your birthday. You don’t need to work on honing your culinary skills today, too.”

  Lily puts her hands on her hips defiantly. “This is your parents’ famous sauce, though. I’ve only ever seen pasta sauce come out of a jar. This is fascinating to see it come together from fresh tomatoes and herbs.”

  It’s hard not to smile at Lily’s interest in something that has been part of my family’s lives since we moved to Maine. My parents’ vegetable garden got larger from year to year as they learned how better to grow their own food, all part of their efforts to save money and avoid trips into town for supplies.

  “Okay, you can stay and watch,” I concede as I add some salt and pepper to the ingredients in the sauté pan, “but the hard part is over. We’re just–” The doorbell rings, cutting me off, and I look over at the front door with concern. “You expecting someone?”

  Lily looks about as confused as I am as she moves toward the front door and shakes her head. “Wasn’t planning on any other company.”

  I remain in the kitchen while Lily unlocks the front door to greet our unexpected visitor. The moment I hear Derek’s name come out of her mouth, my heart rate seems to double. I try to relax as I give the sauce mixture a final stir before setting down the wooden spoon and reducing the heat on the stove to a low simmer.

  When I turn the corner to see Derek standing in the doorway, his gaze latches on to mine, his grinning expression immediately faltering as he takes in my presence in the room. He’s holding a bottle of wine in his hand with a white ribbon tied in a fancy bow around the neck of the bottle.

  I take a few steps closer to the front door and notice that the bottle has condensation on it. He didn’t just bring the wine as a birthday gift for Lily. He brought a cold bottle, clearly expecting to crack it open with her during his impromptu visit.

  “Hi, Derek,” I say with a forced smile as I slip my arm around Lily’s waist, making it abundantly clear that he will not be partaking in any wine with my girlfriend tonight.

  Derek’s eyebrows rise slightly as he looks from me to Lily.

  “This is Dante Martes,” Lily says casually as she glances to the side at me. “My boyfriend.”

  “Boyfriend?” Derek questions as if Lily’s speaking a different language. “I thought he was your contractor, helping you out with renovations or something?”

  “He is,” Lily confirms as she glances behind her to the newly stained white cabinets with tan-tiled backsplash in the kitchen, “but he’s also my boyfriend.”

  “I see.” Derek shifts uncomfortably where he stands before extending the bottle of wine in front of him. “Well, this is for you. Maybe we can catch up another time.”

  Lily accepts the bottle from him with a meager smile, and in a way it pains me to see the torn look in her eyes. The civil thing to do would be to invite Derek in to join us for dinner, but given that I can barely stand him being in the doorway, I know an extended stay would be disastrous for the rest of Lily’s birthday.

  “Thanks, Derek. I’ll give you a call this weekend, and I promise we’ll talk about more than just work stuff this time.”

  Derek nods, looking slightly more satisfied but still disappointed. “Happy birthday, Lily.”

  There’s this awkward moment when it looks like he’s going to lean forward to hug her, but he seems to think better of the move and turns around instead. We watch as he strolls back to his shiny black truck. I feel even better with each step he takes away from us. By the time he’s pulling out of the driveway, I find myself breathing a sigh of relief.

  “Well, that was interesting,” Lily comments as she closes the front door. “Sorry about that.”

  I shake my head at her. “I should be the one apologizing. I don’t mean to turn into an overprotective bear like that, but something about him just rubs me the wrong way.”

  “It’s okay. It’s good that he saw us together.”

  I glance at Lily curiously before making my way back toward the kitchen. “You really want to feed his raging jealously more?”

  Lily scowls at me playfully and shakes her head. “He needs to see me with someone else. He needs to know I�
�m serious about this.”

  I’m about to grab the wooden spoon to start stirring the sauce on the stove again, but I freeze at Lily’s words. When she gives me a questioning look, I abandon the stove and slowly wrap my arms around her waist. “We’re getting serious, are we?”

  I see the change in Lily’s eyes like a switch being flipped. It takes less than a second for her to grasp my face between her hands and crash her lips to mine. I meet her advance with equal vigor as my hands snake up her back and into her hair. Before I even realize what I’m doing, I have her pressed against the counter while I’m working the button and zipper on her shorts.

  So much for dinner.

  By the time I have Lily’s shorts and panties to her ankles, she’s already removed her shirt, revealing her black lace bra that she knows is my favorite. I glance up her practically naked body with hungry eyes before lifting her so that she’s sitting on the edge of the counter.

  “Dante!” She cries my name I swiftly separate her legs and dive in between them with my mouth. My eager tongue finds her tantalizing clit and teases it with soft flicks and nibbles before licking the entire length of her wet pussy over and over.

  “Oh my God,” Lily breathes out in barely a whisper before she gasps the moment my tongue probes her opening. “It’s too good, Dante. It’s too fucking good.”

  Her hands are in my hair, only encouraging me to lick her harder and faster. When her moans fill the room, I find myself overwhelmed with the need to feel more of her. Two of my fingers enter her and slowly work their way in and out, savoring in the warmth and wetness of feeling inside her.

  When I enclose my lips around her clit and tug it firmly with my mouth, I know she’s getting close. Her hips buck slightly with each movement I make. Her heavy breathing escalates into a cry of pleasure at the same time I feel her clench around my fingers. I don’t stop or slow down. I keep pleasuring her until she has fully come back down from the height of her orgasm.

  When my movements eventually slow to a stop, I grasp Lily’s hips and step between her legs as I return to eye level with her, happy to find a look of utter satisfaction on her face.

  “You’re a beast,” she declares as she struggles to get her breathing under control. She grasps my face between her palms and leans forward to kiss me, surprising me when her tongue sneaks into my mouth that was busy pleasuring her just moments before. After a few seconds, she pulls back with a curious grin on her face. “I can see why you like doing that. I don’t taste half bad.”

  I laugh. “You taste incredible, but that’s not why I do it.”

  A spark of spontaneity ignites within me, and suddenly I find myself ready to throw my well-planned romantic gesture for later out the window. I’m absolutely ready to do this now. Reaching in my pocket, I pull out a tiny white gift box and place it in Lily’s hand. “I do all of this because I love you. Words and gifts and gestures only do so much to show this indescribable feeling I have inside, but I hope you feel it, too. I hope you know how much I care about you.”

  Lily is speechless as I grasp her hand from underneath to curl her fingers around the gift box. She stares down at it for a moment before looking back at me.

  “Open it,” I encourage her with a nod to the box.

  She doesn’t hesitate as she pulls the loose strand of the ribbon to untie it from the box. When she removes the lid and pulls apart the tissue paper to see my gift inside, her face lights up in an exquisite smile. “Dante, it’s perfect.”

  She pulls the necklace by its delicate chain out of the box until the silver symbol of my love for her is dangling at the bottom of the necklace between us.

  The symbol of infinity.

  Tears lace Lily’s eyes as she looks up at me from the necklace. “It’s so you,” she says quietly.

  I ease the necklace out of Lily’s hand to help her put it on, but when I take it from her, she catches my hand with hers, turning it over and inspecting my tattoo carefully. She runs her finger along the black lines of the tattoo until she’s traced the entire symbol of infinity.

  “How long have you had this?” she asks cautiously. I’ve seen her curiosity about my tattoo before, but she’s never asked me about it.

  “Four years. I got it when I turned eighteen.”

  “It clearly has meaning to you.”

  Lily can never know the full story behind my tattoo, but I at least want her to understand how significant it is to me. “That symbol has a lot of meaning to my family.”

  When I don’t elaborate any further, Lily nods her understanding. “Well, now it has a lot of meaning to me, too.”

  My heart swells within my chest to hear Lily say this, and it catches me off guard. It’s strangely comforting to know that Lily draws meaning from this simple symbol that has been at the core of my family’s love and commitment from the beginning. I wish I could tell her how much what she said just affected me.

  Instead I kiss her softly on the lips, then on the cheek, then on her neck. I kiss her with reverence down her bare collarbone until my lips find the area of her heart, and I kiss her there, too.

  “For you,” Lily whispers softly above me. “It beats for you, Dante.”

  I glance up at her, tears burning behind my eyelids as I realize just how lucky I am.

  I have never lived a normal life, and I never will, but I may have found everything I’ll ever need right here in this beautiful woman before me. The hardships and solitude and years of hiding from the world all somehow led to this, and I couldn’t be happier for it. Every single thing I’ve had to endure was completely worth it.

  I’ve known my parents’ story for years but never truly understood it until now. The physical and emotional pain and suffering they had to endure should have broken them, but they rose above it. In the end they had each other and they had me, and that was enough. It didn’t matter how they got there or that they lost everything else along the way. It was all worth it in the end.

  Now it’s my turn. It’s time to put my past behind me and focus on my own new beginning. It all starts right here with Lily in my arms.

  I’m ready.

  21

  The reinvention of my life has begun.

  I’m essentially living at Lily’s house now, which started a month and a half ago after I spent the night with Lily on her birthday and we both realized how amazing it was to spend even our non-waking hours together. There’s nothing quite like starting each day with the love of my life by my side, especially when she’s lacking in clothing and hungry to show me just how happy she is to find me in bed next to her in the morning. The experience of having a partner to share each day with is completely new to me but absolutely welcome in my life. With each passing week it makes me think more to the future and the possibilities that await us.

  In the meantime, I’ve slowly been working my way into society, stepping more outside the protective bubble I grew up in than I ever have before. I actually have a job now, and even though it doesn’t pay anything, it’s rewarding in other ways. I volunteer building houses with Habitat for Humanity, a way to integrate with the outside world and do something productive without bringing too much attention to myself. Applying my home construction and renovation experience toward making other people’s lives better has given me a sense of purpose unlike I’ve ever felt before.

  It also leaves me exhausted by the end of the day, but it’s a good kind of exhaustion. Today has been a particularly long day trying to help finish out a project before the weekend is over, and while I know I should go back to Lily’s and clean up before she gets off her shift, I decide to drop in at the tavern for a drink instead.

  The tavern’s parking lot is particularly full on this Saturday evening. I don’t usually like coming here when it’s packed because Lily can’t spend as much time with me and I feel bad distracting her from her other patrons, but tonight I’m making an exception. It’s been exactly six months since I first laid eyes on Lily the day I had a mental breakdown after bringing Cindy
home when she was released from prison. Lily may not realize what this day means to me, and I don’t really plan on telling her, but I’m going to celebrate it anyway. What better place to celebrate than having a drink right where it all started?

  After I park and step inside the tavern, disappointment overwhelms me at the sight of my table being taken. Taking a quick look around, I realize every table in the place is taken except for a couple seats at the bar. I reluctantly settle into the nearest seat at the end of the bar.

  “Hey, Dante,” Jodi greets me from behind the counter as she fixes her long brown hair into a ponytail.

  Ever since Lily and I became an official couple, I’ve been on a first name basis with almost everyone at the tavern. I smile back at Jodi. “Just a little busy in here tonight.”

  She shrugs off my comment. “Typical Saturday.” She leans in over the counter close to me to overcome the steady hum of the room and whispers, “At least we have some good tippers tonight.”

  I’m about to respond to her when the words get caught in my throat at the sight of Lily emerging from the kitchen door on the opposite end of the bar. She looks a bit frazzled and doesn’t even notice me as she makes her way into the sea of tables with a large tray of food in her hands.

  Jodi follows my gaze to Lily and laughs. “I guess I won’t be getting any tips from you tonight. I’ll let your girl take care of you.”

  I nod gratefully at Jodi. “Thanks.”

  With a brief smile, Jodi gets back to helping the other guys seated at the bar. I turn in my seat to look for Lily among the packed tables and constant motion throughout the room. She’s just finished setting down the last plate at a table of four middle-aged men when I spot her, and though her beauty and charisma should be demanding my attention, my eyes are drawn instead to the balding man at the table checking out her ass with a hungry look on his face.