Zauran

by Poppet

  I don't have to consider it, my bare feet are already running, my heart is bounding.

  I am so thrilled you're here!

  Thank God!

  Thank you thank you thank you!

  Squealing with laughter I launch, caught by him, swung around and held tight, safe.

  “Venix! Oh my god. It's you!”

  Harmony calms my heart and safety embalms me with the defined bulk of him. His embrace is a familiar safety net, a piece of home in another's chest.

  Smiling, kissing my nose, he forces me to stand again, holding my hands and surveying me, “Look at you! You look enchanting Zaria. Pregnancy suits you.”

  “How do you–”

  He shakes his head, pressing fingers over my lips, “Come, let's walk. We need to talk.”

  Glancing back at the still vacant lawn at Ryan's house, I nod. They can wait for me.

  With his arm around me he guides me into the woods, pulling me through space to stand with him on the mountain slope we went sledding down not so long ago, before he left, before he took me to Zauran and encouraged me to go his way.

  Venix gives me another impulsive hug and it feels so good, so familiar and safe. I curl in, inhaling the fresh scent of ice cold forest which always comes off his skin.

  “Zaria...”

  “Mmm?” I don't want to let go. I want to stay here where nothing can hurt me and nothing is confusing.

  But he forces me away from his chest to sit with him on the loam of pine needles.

  “Angel,” he smiles, catching my nose between his fingers while gracing me with a magnificent smile. “I'm going to cut right to the chase here darling. Do you want these children? Zauran broke a universal law when he placed them there without your consent or knowledge.”

  I nod, emphatically. “Yes. I didn't think I was ready, but I've had days alone to think about it and consider it from every angle. I really love him Venix. I'm ready to begin anew. Zauran has worked a miracle in my heart. I was so afraid of loss after losing my own family, but this gesture, no matter if he did wrong, it opened my mind to the idea of daring to love someone so much again. I will never have my parents and brother back, but I can start my own family. In a normal nurturing environment. Darise isn't nurturing and he kept us living in a wholly unnatural way. Zauran is stable, normal, he does the same things I do, he is a far better match for me. And he's sensitive to my fears and worries, to my scars...”

  I'm speeding words out of my mouth, for some reason afraid he'll take the children away the way Ryan threatened to.

  I need these babies. I need them to give me a family again. To return to me the way of life I've missed so deeply that I was afraid to admit it to myself. I crave the normal of family life.

  Without family I've been barren, just a cold tundra the wind keeps stripping of warmth.

  I've been lonely.

  But he smiles, and it's tranquil and encouraging.

  “Okay,” he nods. Taking my hand and closing his two around it, burning comfort right into me, he says, “He's back, waiting for you at Ryan's. I just needed to hear it from you first.”

  “He's back?!” I tug, trying to stand, to run to Zauran, but Venix's grip keeps me down.

  “Zaria, I'm staying. I'm moving back to my old home and taking care of Jowendrhan's mistakes.”

  It's an offer. I can hear it, sense it, feel it. A one time offer to try the untried road he tempted me to travel. I turn it down the diplomatic way; I'm in love, deeply, with Zauran.

  “Wow, so you're staying with us again? That's fantastic! But won't you miss heaven and … I dunno, all that stuff you pined for?” I say, avoiding the real issue.

  I watch his eyes melt with quicksilver white fire, matching the stark white hair that offsets his perfectly light-caramel skin. He looks like something edible from heaven, more defined and 'bigger' than he was before.

  His right hand comes up and cups the side of my face, staring at me with the bittersweet tenderness of a man who loved and lost. It's an awkward pause while I sense the furor happening behind the gentle smile he's giving me.

  There's a split second when he leans closer and then catches himself, and I become fully aware of how many powerful men there are who could explode, or implode, at any moment, all for the chance to bed a Slakax.

  Am I really that rare a species?

  What does it mean to be Slakax? Am I in danger? Will there be peace when I stand by my decision?

  “I can go back at any time. This time it was my choice, Zaria,” he says, giving me that enigmatic smile.

  “Oh,” I nod, biting on my lip, trying to hide the urgency riding me to run to Zauran.

  He laughs, pulling me up when he stands abruptly, “Come on then, go hug the father of these unique children inside you.”

  I don't have time to question, I fly, running back the way we came, through the anomaly that transports us from place to place, across the road and right into Ryan's entrance hall.

  The chaos hits me immediately. Sveta and Ryan are with Zauran. Jowendrhan is with Phoebe, Božena, and Aisyx.

  It's like Zauran can sense me coming because he turns, looking across the huge hallway straight at me, his expression frozen, then bursting into a wide smile, his basalt eyes lighting up with aqua steam.

  My knees cave at the sight of him, at the bruising around his left eye and the swollen skewness of his lip.

  Oh my god!

  I'm immediately weak, flailing, and he bolts over gleaming marble, catching me before I fall, lifting me up and swinging me, hugging me so tight I can't breathe, his nose in my neck, then his lips on mine, sinking love back into me, through me, around me.

  I cling, experiencing emotions as if I've been murdered and resurrected inside a heartbeat. Oblivious to the others, I drink from his lips again, weeping with jubilation, so happy he's here.

  Vaguely aware of the conversation beyond us, I hear Venix come in. Zauran seems reluctant, but he breaks the kiss, placing my feet back on the ground and turning with me to face the others, his arm possessively around me, keeping me close.

  Scowling at Jowendrhan, Venix approaches Božena.

  Standing in front of her, he offers his hand in introduction, “Božena I am Venix, Jowendrhan's elder.”

  “You don't look like a vampyre,” she sneers at him as if he is a bad smell that wafted indoors.

  She completely ignores the proffered hand.

  “I'm not. I'm an archangel,” he says in a flat tone.

  Her eyes widen, going so dark they look black.

  Venix gets straight to the point, the way he did with me, “Božena, do you want these children?”

  “No.”

  It's cold, detached, disinterested, dripping with disdain from her toxic tongue.

  Venix nods, forcing her to the only chair in the entrance and placing his hands on her belly when she sits.

  “I'll take these then,” he says, and instantly her stomach is flat, as if she was never pregnant.

  “Wait! Venix, what the heck? What did you just do?!” I ask, alarm getting the better of me.

  He gives me a secretive wink, “Zaria, Spirit takes care of all children, don't worry about their well-being.” Then he looks at Božena again, “Do you want to be vampyre?”

  She shakes her head, watching him warily.

  He nods just once, places his palm on her head, and a black mist flows all over her, shrouding her in a puff of dark cloud.

  “You bastard! I'm going to fucking kill you!”

  Darise's rage fueled voice chills my blood, the world slowing down with the shock of my heart as if he physically punched me.

  I'm hurled into a backward trajectory, Zauran slamming into me to double the impact of my head hammering the marble floor.

  It all happens in slow motion, my hair flying up– Zauran's thick arm landing next to my face and for some reason I notice every single hair on his arm as if committing it to memory for the last time– Lying down, the view of the room sideways, muzzle flash
burns my retina as I look down the barrel of a metallic gun–

  Holding it, hate distorting his face, fury pops Darise's veins out on his forehead as the sonic boom of gunfire explodes, delayed in my head–

  Zauran's grip tightens, burying me under him, protecting me–

  Darise's insane expression morphs to a look of horror, his eyes drawn away from Zauran as we hit the ground, avoiding the bullet–

  The world tilts and spins, panic suffocating me and muffling the room, swiveling my gaze to look where he looks–

  Seithe's arms are around Phoebe and his head snaps back, a deep dark hole manifesting in his temple–

  A godawful scream of anguish–

  Phoebe falls with Seithe, his embrace pulling her into the blood spatter on the pristine floor–

  Sveta dives across the room, snatching the gun from Darise and snarling a malicious smile as he aims it with his pivot, straight at Ryan... moment by painful moment I watch his finger tighten on the trigger, the gun jumps in his strong grasp–

  “This is for shooting me you motherfucker!”

  Ryan's shocked expression as his shoulder slams back with impact, then another and another and another–

  Venix blurs into action, shielding Ryan with his enormous build glowing brilliance into the hallway–

  Darise is on Zauran, yanking him off me, leaving me cold and vulnerable–

  “Think you can march in and fuck what you please? Well this is what happens when you screw with another man's woman...”

  It's a blur of violence–

  Pain spreads through my chest, eating me like an evil enzyme.

  Staring into death's eyes, his hands close in my hair, agony burns through my head, and instantly the reverse happens, everything speeding up too fast, cacophony hitting me, nothing makes sense–

  I have fists flying past my cheek, I'm knocked aside, into the rapidly expanding solid black mass smoking up from the floor, falling into Phoebe's murderous shriek.

  Chapter 25

  Zaria:

  Arms reach out, appearing underneath me, snatching me out of midair when a warrior's bellow ricochets through my head.

  Clutched tight in glowing arms, the room spinning at a dizzying pace, I catch a glimpse of Aisyx pounding his fist into Darise with the warrior's howl still booming out of his loud-hailer chest.

  And then peace blasts the room in white lightning.

  “Enough,” torpedoes into my ear from the chest against it.

  Darise drops, Aisyx falls, Božena swoons, Ryan is slumped against the wall, his head drooping on a wilting neck that was once so strong and proud that my heart snaps a string which binds it closed. Compassion and empathy are bleeding out of me in a torrent.

  Jowendrhan's eyes glow brilliant white as he rushes to scoop up Phoebe and cradle her tight; I'm abandoned on the hard floor and it's still a waking nightmare-dream when Venix and his blinding glow swoop for the smoke all over the floor.

  New arms wrap around me and I'm pulled back to rest against someone warm and solid.

  Only now do I realize I'm sobbing, my breath coming into me with hysterical hiccups, unable to look away as Venix pulls Seithe up out of the smoke.

  The black cloud is pouring out of his eyes and hands and he is dissolving, dissipating with the powdery mist.

  Seithe was darklight too.

  Venix puts his hand over the wound in Seithe's temple, forcing tears from my eyes as I stare at the sun he becomes.

  “It's too much. He's mortal. I can't save him,” Venix says with so much emotion, I am instantly fractured.

  Venix changes, morphing back to human, his face set in bitter anguish, tears glittering his eyes, and his gaze settles on Darise who just rolled closer, unsteadily trying to get his feet under him.

  The arms around me instinctively flinch tighter at the movement.

  “You murdered your brother!” bellows from Venix to Darise.

  Phoebe's wail cuts through my soul, it's so thick with the torture of grief. Fighting, wrestling, I battle my way out of the arms around me, scrambling across the floor to Phoebe, wrapping my arms around her and trying to save her from the loss.

  I am hysterical with tears and sobbing, reliving the death of my brother on a bombed road.

  Her pain is my pain, her tears are my tears... it's visceral. Trembling, I coo, smoothing her hair, sobbing in unison with my sister, knowing we are one in so many ways and I'd have done anything to save her from this kind of agony, rocking her and clinging as tightly to her as she bites fingers into me.

  It's a grief so sharp it cuts your soul, shredding you into an ugly mass of emotional scars that nothing can heal. Jowendrhan releases her to me, and we cling to each other, bonded through the horror of this war, of this loss... death's stench makes me choke.

  I'm blind with scalding tears, never wanting to relive tragedy again.

  No more. Not ever.

  God take me now, save Phoebe, save us from this unbearable curse of angry men and their fucking guns!

  Curling into each other, hiding from the carnage, like barnacles closing against the storm and ready to weather the smash of ocean, I pray relentlessly with my heart so broken my nose is leaking and I am beyond caring.

  Anguish is ugly, it's ungraceful and swollen with raw tears.

  This is what death looks like to the living.

  “I'm sorry,” I stutter.

  This is my fault. If I hadn't gone to Zauran none of this would have happened. None of it!

  Babbling my mantra, I'm gurgling on choking snot, “I'm so sorry – sorry... sorry...”

  Her wail reaches another shattering shriek and I hold her tighter, pouring the love I soaked from the starlit pond into my sister.

  I owe her all of it.

  This is my fault!

  Tears slip unchecked over my cheeks, blinding me to everything but her quaking torment in my arms.

  *

  Zauran:

  She leaves me, fighting me to reach Phoebe, and I unclamp my hold, releasing her.

  Letting her go; it's the hardest thing I've ever done, when I can hear her thoughts and feel her spirit shattering.

  My own tears rise up at the sisters locked together like twins in a womb. Zaria is possessed to give comfort, to save, to staunch the pain she knows so well.

  If anything could break Zaria, this is it. Right here, right now.

  Snapping my focus to Darise, he's gone into shock with the realization of his actions.

  Venix is blasting Ryan with healing, closing bullet wounds and extracting slugs from his body.

  Aisyx and Jowendrhan both stand like guardians on either side of Božena. Sveta watches Ryan with a look of pure hatred.

  Why?

  Inhaling deeply, Zaria's emotions are beginning to overpower my calm, shaking my soul so it clatters my teeth.

  Staring back at the woman I'd die for, I'm traumatized to see the compassionate Plyx bleeding out of her and entombing Phoebe, wrapping her in love's purest form.

  I can't intervene.

  This is the cruelest fate any man has endured, ever.

  Anguish rips out of my chest at Zaria and my children giving their life to Phoebe... until her light winks out and she slumps, broken.

  Like a bearskin rug before a sadist's fireplace her beauty graces the polished floor next to what remains of Seithe's corpse. He smokes, dissolving slowly now, disappearing and returning to its maker.

  I warned her when I told her, this also makes you part-neuri. You won't die, Zaria. Not until you choose to.

  She chose to die, for Phoebe.

  A howl burns me to the quick, a pain so absolute the world cracks, lightning sears and booms the clear sky outside, and I am reduced to pure energy, double checking my love's light is truly gone.

  My aqua vision burns and scorches with Venix's bright flare, but Zaria is gone.

  All of her pink light is in Phoebe.

  All of it!

  NO!

  Chapter 26


  Zauran:

  The aftermath is otherworldly.

  I am numb.

  It's with disbelief that I take my angel outside like a ragdoll draped over my arms.

  Slumping weakly onto the lawn, I sit in the flash-flood shower that has amassed over Dedinje, caught in my own wave of grief I smooth her hair away, cradling my petal.

  Such a delicate flower, so resilient for so long, she gave it all away for love. She would do anything to save another from the pain she's endured.

  She did.

  She had to save her sister from the torment.

  Bowing my head, I crush her body to my chest, sobbing in the veil of heavenly tears.

  Heaven is crying for you Zaria.

  Sobbing hysterically. Like me.

  I rise out of the fog of trauma, slowly, uncaring.

  Splintered severely, I fold her arms, close her eyes, and kiss her for the last time.

  Heartbroken, I smooth every crease, fixating over her appearance; she must look perfect and adorable, even in death. This image I will remember forever and ever, as long as my blistered puss-filled life will last.

  A crinkle from a wad in her pocket annoys me, and I feel the rage at the injustice rising up, bubbling like magma to annihilate the man who did this to her and Phoebe.

  Impatient, angry, I yank the offensive object out, a key falling to the ground and casting a rainbow through the rain.

  It's natural, we focus on the insignificant to cope. The deluge brushes her hair and glosses her cheeks when I rest her next to me, close.

  Opening the letter, ink spiders across the page with every drop splattering the parchment.

  Glancing over it, I catch the gist of it, wondering myself what the Slakax sentences mean.

  Ryan must have given her the key.

  Picking it up, thumbing it round and round in my fingers, I watch it prism light through the gloom. I haven't seen this key since I was a young boy. It represents the three of us. Our father had it forged so we'd always be united no matter how far apart we are.

  Brothers in arms. We are each others strength. When one falls the next one rises to support him and lift him back up.