Never Again, No More

by Untamed

  I gave him a nod. It was all I could do. His words had set me on fire, and I was too engrossed in trying not to drop my drawers right there and fuck him in the hallway to say anything. “I gotta go,” I repeated, pulling away. Then I walked out of his apartment.

  Lord knows I needed strength in a major way. Terrence was right. I loved Pooch through and through, but when it came to throwing down in the bed, Terrence beat Pooch hands down. Pooch was great, especially when he was actually making love to me, instead of trying to get a quick nut. I was not dogging Pooch’s skills, but there was great, and then there was amazing, and Terrence was amazing. He made love like he was the artist and I was his canvas. He took his time and paid attention to detail. He was slow when I needed it and fast when I wanted it. In the end, he didn’t just create art; he orchestrated a masterpiece. Terrence was like that.

  Shit, five minutes later I was riding with all the windows down and the AC on, trying to cool my ass and pussy down. At the light, I took out my perfume and sprayed myself all over. I didn’t need to arrive home and have Pooch smell my scent too. I was convinced men were like bloodhounds. When their woman’s scent was in the air, they could smell that shit a mile away. That was the reason I had had to get away from Terrence. My essence had been about to start running down my damn legs. I swore that muthasucka could bring me to a climax just with his words.

  When I walked into the house, Pooch was sitting on the sofa. “Hey baby,” I said, then kissed him on the lips.

  He threw down the remote. “Where you been?”

  “I told you I went to the nail salon,” I said. I walked into the kitchen to get some water, and he followed behind me.

  “I stopped there before I came home, and they said you’d already left. I came right home from the nail salon. It’s only a five-minute drive from the salon to the house, and that was over an hour ago. So how the hell I beat you home?”

  Was he serious? I gave him a crazy look as I swallowed my water. “Damn, Pooch. Since when do I have to go straight to one place and come right back home? You got me on some kind of schedule or some shit?”

  He posted in his no-nonsense pose. “Don’t fuck with me right now, Trinity. Stop avoiding my question. Where the fuck you been?”

  “If you must know, I stopped by Terrence’s to check on the kids, and because he wants me to come up with this tattoo design for him.”

  “That shit couldn’t wait until you picked the kids up tomorrow?”

  “Well, Pooch, you have me on such a tight schedule, if I spend more than five extra minutes, then you will go berserk,” I countered. “Damn. And where is all this shit coming from? You know I could’ve been out eating, or did you forget we didn’t grab anything?”

  He laughed and pulled me to him. “Then I would’ve known you were lying,” he said. “I told you before you became my woman, nothing goes on that I can’t find out about if I want to know. I knew you were at Terrence’s house, so it wouldn’t have been a good look if you’d lied to me.”

  I was shocked. My mouth nearly fell to the floor. “You tracking me or some shit?”

  “Nah. One of my runners saw your car at his apartment complex and called me to make sure I knew. Everybody looks out for Daddy. Now, you sure he called you over about a tattoo?”

  I was nervous, but I held my ground. “Yes,” I said, then I showed him the paper Terrence had given me. “He wants me to think of a design to symbolize these words. He even paid me for it.” I showed him the money.

  Begrudgingly, he relented. “Fine. Do the tattoo, but tell that nigga to wait next time. I don’t like you over there unless you have to be. And tell him you don’t need his fucking money unless it’s going to his kids. I got you, not him.”

  “He just wanted to pay me for my work,” I said in Terrence’s defense. Then I turned to put my glass in the dishwasher.

  “As long as that shit is paid only in green,” he threw out.

  I looked over my shoulder. “How else is it going to be paid, Pooch?” I asked, playing dumb about his remark.

  He laughed. “Humph,” was his response. He walked up behind me and began kissing me on my neck. “You ready for some of my loving?”

  Feeling his breath against the nape of my neck turned me on, and I moaned as I caressed his face. “Yes,” I replied, and I was. Terrence had worked me the fuck up.

  Without another word, he spun me around, lifted me into his arms, and kissed my neck as he carried me upstairs to our bedroom. He took his time undressing me as he kissed me from head to toe. By the time he was inside me, a thought entered my head that I had never thought would. I pictured Terrence on top of me. I ain’t gonna lie. That shit heightened my arousal, and I started throwing everything into it. When we climaxed, we were both spent, and even Pooch was amazed.

  “Damn, baby. I haven’t seen that side of you in a while,” he said, holding me from behind. “That shit was fucking awesome.”

  I laughed, although I was feeling guilty at the same time. “Yeah, it was,” I agreed. “I love you, Pooch.”

  He turned me to face him and held my face in his hands as I looked into his eyes. “Like I said earlier, the only payments given to you are in green. Now, you feel me on that, and you feel me real good. I love you, Trinity. I love only you. I’m a good nigga to you and for you, and I want to remain good. Remember that shit, and remember that shit real good.”

  Pooch’s words sent chills up and down my body. “Okay, Pooch. I remember.”

  He kissed my forehead. “Good. Now let’s get some sleep. You’ve drained me,” he replied, and within seconds he was snoring, but I wasn’t.

  Pooch’s sixth sense had told him that Terrence was lurking, and I had to convince Terrence to stop before Pooch or one of his boys found out. I didn’t want anything bad to happen to Terrence. I would die if it did. I realized at that moment, that no matter how I felt about Pooch, a part of me would always love Terrence. For both of our sakes, I had to tame that side.

  LaMeka

  “Oh hell no!” Tony said, pacing back and forth in our bedroom. “What the fuck were you thinking when you decided to move your sister in here?”

  Heaven help me. The moment we walked in the door, he had begun his third degree and a temper tantrum. He was worse than our boys. Why couldn’t he just let this go? She was my sister, for goodness’ sake. At the end of the day, she was my sister, and I was going to have her back, no matter what.

  “What the hell am I supposed to do, Tony? Our so-called mother kicked her out, and she’s only seventeen. Where the hell is she supposed to go?”

  “Check it. We have a two-bedroom apartment. Where is she going to sleep? Our kids are in one bedroom, and we’re in the other. We have only a kitchen, two bathrooms, and the living room outside of that. Where the hell is she going to stay? In the bottom bunk, with LaMichael, or in their bathtub?”

  “Then why don’t you try to get us a three-bedroom?”

  He pointed to himself. “Me? Shit. I didn’t create this little situation—”

  “Well, neither did I,” I interrupted him. “She’s my sister. I am all she has left. We’re just going to have to make the best of it.”

  Tony threw his hands up. “Whatever, man. What the fuck ever.” With that, he stormed out of the bedroom.

  That went lovely, I thought as I sat on my bed. Even though Tony wasn’t happy with my decision, I was glad he had relented. I’d had enough drama at my mom’s house. I didn’t need any extra at my own.

  My bedroom door opened just then, and I looked up to find Misha standing there. “I’m sorry to cause problems, Meka, really I am,” Misha said, apologizing, as she entered the room.

  I stood up, walked over to her, and hugged her. “You don’t have nothing to apologize for. Tony is being an ass right now, but he will come around.”

  “Thanks, Meka.”

  “You’re my baby sister, and this is what we do. We look out for each other.”

  I left Misha alone in the bedroom to study
for her tests while I played with Tony Jr. and LaMichael. Tony sat in the living room, watching television, although I could tell that he was pissed as hell. I knew the conversation was far from over, but he could talk until his bum leg was healed, because my sister wasn’t going anywhere unless my mom let her move back in. With the way I felt, even that was questionable.

  After thirty minutes, Misha emerged from my bedroom and helped me make dinner, and of course, Tony then went back into the bedroom, claiming we were all making too much noise. I swear, I didn’t know what had crawled up in his ass lately, but he was beginning to get on my last nerve. At any rate, I enjoyed chopping it up with Misha and cooking. It actually felt like a relief to have her there and to have someone to talk to and make me laugh. The arguments between Tony and me had increased lately, and if we weren’t arguing, we were plain ass ignoring one another. That shit couldn’t be healthy, but I loved him no matter what.

  Surprisingly, we all made it through dinner together. We had a civilized conversation and shared a few laughs among ourselves. I had to admit it, we felt like a family. Maybe my sister being here was the extra life we needed to bring us back together again. Sometimes we thought that we were helping others, when in actuality, God had turned evil into good to help us.

  After dinner, we got ready to call it a night. I told Misha that Charice would be by to pick her up for school the next morning. Then I got some blankets and a pillow for her to sleep on the living-room sofa before I bathed the boys and took my shower. After I climbed into bed with Tony, he pulled me close to him.

  “It’s been a minute,” he whispered in my ear as he kissed me on my neck.

  “Yeah, I know.” I giggled.

  “Let me put this thang on you, LaMeka,” he urged, pressing his nature against my thighs.

  “Sure, but I need to talk to you first.”

  Rolling onto his back, he huffed. “What now? Come on, baby. Okay, look, I get your sister had nowhere to go. I’m not even going to stress that shit. It’ll work itself out.”

  “Good, but that’s not what I was going to say.”

  “Can we please discuss our issues later or, better yet, work them out?” He laughed and began grinding on me.

  “Yes, we can, but that’s not what I was going to say, either.”

  “I give. What’s up?” he asked, propping himself up on one elbow.

  “Well, it looks like my sister might be here for a while. We both know how my mom is, but she never kicked me out. I think she’s pretty serious about this, and Joe—that lowlife—is going to ride my mom’s gravy train until the wheels fall off. Having said that, I have a lot more responsibility on me with her in the house, and I’m going to need a vehicle,” I explained.

  He gave me a confused look. “How the hell you gonna get a car when you don’t have a job and neither do I?”

  Taking a deep breath, I grabbed his hand. “I was hoping that maybe you could ask Ryan to buy us one, and we could pay him back in payments with your disability checks, like maybe three hundred dollars a month.”

  He snatched his hand away from me so fast, he almost bent my fingers. “Man, I ain’t doing that shit!” he exclaimed.

  “Why not?”

  “What man do you know asks another man to buy him a car? What kind of shit is that?”

  “Ask for me. If he feels like I’m asking—”

  “So now you want me to look like an even bigger ass,” he interrupted. “How do I look asking him to buy you a car because I can’t?”

  “Well, then, why can’t we buy a car for ourselves? We have twelve thousand dollars saved up between what’s left of your lump sum money and what you’ve saved from your checks. We could use half of that and get a used midsize car,” I explained.

  “That money is for the kids, man!”

  “This is for the kids! I still need to get Junior back and forth to appointments, and it would really help me out when I go grocery shopping. Plus, I have to get my sister back and forth. I can’t keep depending on Charice, Lucinda, Trinity, or one of your boys to come through,” I argued.

  “A’ight, so we need a vehicle. How much have you saved up from Junior’s disability checks?”

  “Only, like, five hundred dollars, Tony. I use his money to take care of the bills for the house, since you’ve been slacking off lately with helping with that,” I said with an attitude. I was tired of doing everything my damn self.

  “Well, how about you get a damn job, then?” Tony said sarcastically.

  Now I was fired up, and I lit up on his ass. “How about you get me a damn car so I can get one? Or, better yet, how about pulling your load in the house you live in as well?”

  Tony’s eyes grew wide. Normally, I didn’t take digs at him. “See, this is why I don’t like dealing wit’ yo’ ass. A brotha is always being underappreciated. I ain’t never got no credit for the shit I do for you,” he said, lying on his back.

  I wasn’t trying to attack Tony, but he had a way of turning everything into an epic debate, so I tried a different approach now to make him reconsider. I rubbed his shoulder. “Look, baby, I wasn’t trying to piss you off, but we really need a car. I understand that it may be difficult for you to ask Ryan for something like that, and maybe we shouldn’t. I don’t want to demean you as a man. So maybe I could ask Trinity if she would buy me one, and then we could pay her and Pooch back.”

  Tony laughed. “Either I get my manhood ripped by asking my boy or I risk getting my shit confiscated by the narcotics agents once Pooch’s ass gets busted. Ain’t that a hell of a choice,” he said, giving voice to exactly what he was thinking.

  “But it’s a choice we have to make,” I asserted, rubbing his arm.

  “Well, get to asking Trinity, then.”

  My mouth nearly hit the floor. There was no way I wanted to be indebted to Pooch. Was he out of his mind? “Are you serious?”

  “We need a car, right? ’Cause I’m not asking Ryan to do that. That shit is gay,” he said, pulling me on top of him. “Now, where were we?”

  “You seriously want me to ask Trinity?” I asked, now appalled.

  He nodded. “Yes. It was your idea.”

  “And what if she says no?” I asked, pushing back.

  “She won’t say no. You know how Trinity is. She is generous like that.”

  “But what if she does?”

  “Then I guess we better stay current on them bus passes,” he joked, but I knew he was serious. “Now, let’s move on to what the hell we started before this discussion.”

  I knew it wasn’t worth discussing it anymore because it would only lead to another fight. I was tired of fighting and arguing and damn sure tired of him. It was becoming apparent that he was hiding from his responsibilities. I simply couldn’t fathom that he’d rather me get the car from a known drug dealer than to make a way on his own.

  Disgusted, I no longer wanted to have sex. I tried to get comfortable and stay in the moment because it had been a while for both of us. Between the fussing, fighting, hooting, hollering and arguing there had been no makeup or attempts at it. So when I say both of us were in need, I meant that. But how do you get in the mood with your man when he’s acting like anything but your man?

  “What the fuck is wrong?” Tony asked angrily as my thoughts came back to the present moment.

  “Nothing,” I mumbled.

  He smacked me on my ass as he attempted to hit it from the back. As I said, my mood was shot. “The hell you say ain’t nothing wrong. I’ve been back here pushing and trying for like five minutes. Help a brother out or something before my shit go down.”

  “I’m ready,” I said frustratingly.

  He sucked his teeth as he continued trying. “Bullshit Meka, no you ain’t. I need that shit flowing like the water in a waterfall. I ain’t trying to stick my shit between the rocks in the waterfall. Come on now.”

  “Well, why don’t you try a little harder to get me in the mood?”

  He stopped and walked around the front
of the bed with his shit hanging in my face. He grabbed it and began bouncing it up and down in my face. “This shit don’t get you ready no more or something? You looking for something new?” he asked angrily.

  I didn’t have the energy to argue. I got up, put on one of his wife beaters, and climbed back into bed. “Go to bed, Tony.”

  “What the fuck?”

  I rolled my eyes and looked over at him. “I said go to bed. This shit ain’t happening tonight.”

  His eyes danced with anger. “Hell no! I want some. Now get your ass up and handle your business.”

  Before I knew it, I replied, “I’ll handle mine when you handle yours!”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” he asked, standing and looking like a superhero with his arms crossed in front of his chest.

  I sat up and looked him dead in the eyes. “Be a man, Tony!” I yelled. “Stop sitting around here all day, every day, like you’re a fucking king and acting like anything but one. Help with the kids, cook, help with the bills or, better yet, go get a damn job! Stop sitting around here as if the whole world owes you something because your leg is fucked up!”

  The moment the last statement came out of my mouth, I shut up, instantly regretting it. Tony’s leg was a taboo subject for him. The mention of it would either set him off or send him into depression mode. He had never gotten over it, and to say it was a sore subject for him was an understatement. It was like picking up his heart and smashing it with your bare hands.

  “No the fuck you didn’t,” he growled angrily in a voice I’d never heard before. His anger was so obvious you could’ve barbecued ribs on his ass.

  I put my hands up apologetically. “I’m so sorry, baby. I didn’t mean it that way. All I’m saying is that just because those dreams didn’t come true doesn’t mean you can’t have new dreams,” I explained, empathetically trying to cover up what I’d said.