Fatal Catch

by Roxe Anne

  Billie and I sit at the campfire and eat the entire bag of marshmallows. We are nice and toasty ourselves.

  Aunt May always makes Rita and Bobby go to bed early. It is sad they didn’t get to join us at the campfire to roast marshmallows. Aunt May says she needs time to herself without kids so she can unwind before she goes to bed. We are only sitting by Mama watching her fish; so why couldn’t the twins do the same? They sure do miss out on a lot of fun.

  • • •

  Mama catches four catfish ranging in weight from one to three pounds. Uncle Frank only catches a few small bullheads. He has never been fishing before. Uncle Jimmy catches the granddaddy of all fish; a twenty-five pound catfish on one of his cane poles using chicken livers. That poor fish has chunks out of him everywhere!

  “Dot, I’ve got a big fish on my line this time. It isn’t any little bullhead. I can’t barely reel it in to shore. It seems like I have been reeling this pole in forever!” Frank says excited.

  Mama winks at us. “It’s about time you caught a real fish, Frank!”

  Uncle Frank keeps reeling his fishing line in until he finally gets his big fish to shore. When he lifts his line out of the water in the dim light, he throws his pole right down at the bank of the river.

  “Dot, this isn’t any fish. I’m not going to touch the damn thing!” He screams at her.

  Mama grabs his pole before the turtle dragged it into the river. Right there in front of all of us was a large snapping turtle. Billie and I sit down on the bank and begin laughing hysterically. We have never seen a grown man throw his fishing pole down before; especially over a little old turtle.

  Uncle Frank begins yelling at us. “I don’t think this is funny! I’m going to get even with you kids when you least expect it. I’m going to teach you not to laugh at me again. Maybe I’ll even tell Dracula where he can find you…alone. And maybe, you’ll have an accident just like your daddy—”

  “Frank, calm down. For crying out loud, it’s just a little turtle and the kids are only teasing you. And don’t you ever bring Dan’s accident up to me or my kids again. That was uncalled for!”

  “I’m sorry, Dot. I was only getting even with your kids for laughing at me and—”

  “There’s no excuse. I don’t ever want you to bring up his name again!”

  Uncle Jimmy goes over to Uncle Frank’s fishing pole and removes the turtle from the hook. The turtle sure will taste good tomorrow night at our annual fish fry. I doubt Uncle Frank will be cleaning it himself.

  Uncle Jimmy always has the best luck fishing. He can catch a fish when no one else is even getting a nibble. He can probably catch a fish in a drought and the river is dry. He is so lucky that way.

  • • •

  Uncle Jimmy, Mama, and Aunt May like to go frogging at night where the creek meets the mouth of the river.

  Uncle Frank tells Mama, “Dot, I’m not going to touch no slimy frog let alone eat one of them!”

  “Go ahead and be bullheaded, Frank. You can just hold the flashlight for us. No matter what, you’re coming with!”

  Uncle Frank yells at Mama. “Don’t you ever embarrass me in front of another man again!”

  Mama gives Uncle Frank a dirty look.

  They all grab their nets and off they go with Uncle Frank two steps behind them pouting and mumbling something about how Mama is going to end up like Daddy too, if she doesn’t watch it.

  Chapter Six

  Billie and I wake up early. We don’t have to use our old fishing poles today.

  “Mama, do we still get to use your fishing poles?” Billie asks.

  “I think you two have proved to me you’re responsible little fishermen after your last adventure; don’t you?”

  Uncle Frank put his arm around Billie almost smothering him to death. “I’m going to tie one end of a rope to the dock and the other end to the boat. You will be able to row out a ways on the river and fish all on your own. How’s that for being such a big guy?”

  “Oh, boy, do you mean it?”

  “Sure do! You have to put your life jacket on first.”

  Billie begins running. “I’ll do that right now!”

  Mama hands Billie his tackle box and bait. “You can fish out there all day if you want to, but you have to put your own bait on your hook. And there will be no one to fix your line if you lose it.”

  “I will. I promise!”

  “You two need to catch us a lot of fish for tonight’s fish fry!” Mama says.

  I am sure happy I don’t have to bait Billie’s fish hook anymore.

  Billie is happy as a clam. Mama and Uncle Frank must trust him a lot to let him take out the boat by himself. He will be sure he makes no mistakes while he’s in the boat. And maybe one day soon he won’t even have to be tied to a rope. Placing the bait on the hook isn’t something he’s going to like, but he has to do it sometime. No one is going to be around to stop him from reeling his line in when he doesn’t get a bite either. If he doesn’t catch any fish, he will learn real quick to be patient.

  Mama packs Billie a lunch and drink for the day. She makes him his favorite sandwich; bologna and ketchup. She fills a thermos full of fresh lemonade she made this morning. He won’t even have to wash his hands before he eats with no adults around. If he really needs to wash, he can just swish his hands in the dirty river water.

  • • •

  I walk over by a big weeping willow tree to fish. There will be plenty of shade and no one else really likes to fish in this spot. I have to be careful, or when I throw my fishing line out, I might catch one of the branches hanging over the river. It is a wonderful spot to read a book when the fish aren’t biting, or to just sit and think. I brought along a Bobbsey twins book, The Secret at the Seashore, which I purchased at a garage sale with money from returning pop bottles. I paid a quarter for the book. It is worth a lot more to me. I won’t ever sell it!

  I bait my hook with a real juicy night crawler which I put vanilla on. This ought to help me catch a big old catfish, even if it takes awhile in this heat.

  I brought along a quilt my Grandma Irene made me to lay on while I read my book. The old quilt has scraps of my old clothes in it. Not that I want to keep my clothes around forever being that most of them were bought at garage sales. Some of them do remind me of happier times when Daddy was still alive. One of the colors I hate the most in my quilt is the brown from my used Brownie outfit. The quilt has a flower sheet on the back with the ugliest colors I have ever seen. Mama gave the sheet to Grandma Irene after Uncle Frank bought her new ones. The thought of him lying on the sheet gives me the creeps.

  I read my book for two hours before I finally get a bite on my fishing pole. It jerks so hard it pulls my pole off the fork stick I have it on. This must be the big one. I grab my pole quick. The water is dark, murky, and deep where I’m sitting. I can’t swim well either. I jerk my pole and begin reeling in fast.

  My line goes slack. I hope I don’t lose my fish. Right there on top of the water is something swimming towards me and the river bank. It doesn’t look too much like any fish I have ever seen. It’s long and the sun is shining right off of its back. The closer it gets to me; I can see…its not any fish. It’s a snake!

  I know poisonous snakes are around the Rock River, but I haven’t ever seen one myself before. It sure isn’t an old garter snake. Chills are running up and down my spine. My heart is about to leap out of my chest. I touch slimy worms, but there is no way I’m touching any snake if it might be poisonous.

  I scream at the top of my lungs. “Help…help…there’s a snake!”

  I hope my screaming doesn’t scare all of Billie’s fish away. The closer the snake comes toward the bank, the louder I scream.

  Uncle Jimmy and Aunt May are the first to hear my screams. They both come running.

  “What’s all the screaming about? I can see Billie is fine in his boat. Did you hook yourself?” Uncle Jimmy shouts.

  “There’s a…a…snake at the end of my fishing
line and its coming toward me. I think it’s…poisonous!”

  “Where is the snake, Missy?”

  “There…there’s the snake. It’s coming toward us!” I yell, as I point to the end of my line. I can just see the top of the snake making ripples in the water as it is swimming directly at me. I think it wants to get even with me for hooking it.

  Uncle Jimmy runs for his gun almost tripping on the campfire from last night. It is hard for him sometimes because he has an old injury from when he was in World War II. His run looks more like a fast walk.

  Aunt May beats Uncle Jimmy to their trailer. “May, go into the kitchen cupboard and get my 38 as fast as you can!” Uncle Jimmy shouts.

  Aunt May rushes into the trailer. They keep their keys on the top shelf of their kitchen cupboards. It is always locked and no one but those two are allowed to touch them. Aunt May brings Uncle Jimmy the pistol, but forgets to retrieve the bullets they keep in a different spot for safety. None of us kids know where the bullets are kept.

  “Now go and get the bullets out of the bedroom. I want to get the snake before it comes to shore!”

  Aunt May hands Uncle Jimmy the bullets. He runs to the river bank where I am standing and loads his pistol as quick as any cowboy I’ve ever seen. He fires at the snake and misses. The snake dives under the water as if it anticipates Uncle Jimmy aiming straight at it.

  “It’s a water moccasin! Missy, move back away from shore. I need to get a better shot at it. I don’t want to worry about you getting hurt.”

  The snake is as angry as an old grizzly bear. It comes right up to the top of the surface and I swear it’s looking right at me. That old snake looks like the devil himself. If I were still holding my pole, I would have thrown it in the river; snake and all.

  Uncle Jimmy takes aim at the snake again. He doesn’t miss this time. He blows him right out of the water. Half of the snake ends up on the river bank right where Uncle Jimmy is shooting. I can’t find where the other half ended up.

  “Missy, it’s a good thing you didn’t catch the snake and try to take it off by yourself. You wouldn’t be standing here with us right now, darling,” Uncle Jimmy informs me.

  “What’s the matter, Missy? Are you afraid of some little old snake?” Billie yells from the boat. “Uncle Jimmy, you shootin’ that old snake out of the water is better than watchin’ any old western at the movies. You sure did scatter him all over the bank!” Billie laughs.

  Rita and Bobby follow Aunt May out of the trailer. “Yeah, Dad, we didn’t know you could shoot like that. It was really cool!” Bobby said grinning from ear to ear.

  Mama and Uncle Frank watched Uncle Jimmy blow up the snake, too. At least the world will be rid of one more snake. Katie peeks out of the trailer window at me. Being a bit of a snake herself; she probably wanted me to get bit.

  Chapter Seven

  Billie and I continue to fish for a couple more hours. The thought of that old snake still gives me chills. I know one thing for sure; I am never going to use vanilla again.

  Mama yells halfway across the river. “Billie, it’s time for you to bring the boat in and clean up. You get to help us clean your fish for supper!”

  You can see his silly little grin from the bank where I am standing. It isn’t taking Billie long to get his boat in. He sure wants to clean his own fish. If you are going to be a fisherman, Mama says you have to clean your own fish.

  “Mama, I want to take my own fish guts out. Can I scale my own bluegill, too?”

  “You have been such a good little fisherman; I will show you how to scale your fish today.”

  “Mama, I think I love the taste of bluegill the best. But those darn boogers swallow the hook every time. I had to cut my line and put a new hook and sinker on every time.”

  “I’m so proud of you, Billie. I think you will be as good of a fisherman as I am someday!”

  Mama lets Billie scale his bluegill. She cuts their heads off and slits their stomachs so Billie can take the guts out. Some fish have to be scaled and others have to be skinned. I would rather scale a fish than skin it.

  Uncle Jimmy gets the turtles out of a separate box tied to the dock. I’m sure glad I don’t have to help clean them. Uncle Jimmy takes it upon himself to clean the turtles. It is more work explaining the cleaning process to someone and he doesn’t want anyone to waste the meat.

  I would have wanted to let those darn turtles loose if they didn’t taste so good. Some parts taste like chicken, some taste like steak. They are sure good. The turtle shells are pretty, especially the painted turtle shells. Uncle Jimmy nails them to a tree for everyone to see.

  • • •

  “Everyone who caught a fish, come on over to the table. You have to clean your share. This includes you, Frank!” Mama says, winking at him.

  The table we’re cleaning on looks more like a kitchen counter than any old fish table I have ever seen. It even has a marble counter with a hand pump and sink to rinse the fish off. The table is so tall everyone has to stand up to use it.

  Mama winks at Bobby. “Your job is to skin the fish. I am designating you to teach Frank so he can assist you.” From the look on Bobby’s face, I think he would rather skin them all himself. Uncle Frank is taking more meat off than skin. He seems to be a bit too happy with using the fillet knife.

  “Billie and Rita, you can take the guts out of the fish. If you find any eggs, there is a separate bowl on the table to place them in,” Mama directs.

  Aunt May walks over to Rita and Bobby. “You better do a good job. Your dad won’t be happy if you throw away his fish eggs.”

  Uncle Jimmy always did say those fish eggs are as good as any caviar he has ever tasted.

  “Missy, you can help me crack the fish over the heads with the hammer. You better make sure you pay attention to how I do it. We don’t want to make the fish suffer!” Mama says.

  Uncle Frank grabs the hammer. “Let me take a crack at killing those fish!”

  “I don’t mind you helping with the killing of these fish, Frank, but pay attention to how I kill them. I don’t need you wasting anymore of the meat!”

  She cuts a section off the cheeks of the fish after she cleans them. This is supposed to be the filet. It is her favorite part.

  Aunt May’s job is to supervise everyone. She really doesn’t like cleaning fish much being she is the oldest of eight children, and the main protein growing up was fish.

  Mama and Aunt May are going to cook the fish in a secret beer batter recipe they never give out. It was passed down to them from their grandma and they are going to pass it down to us girls when we are old enough not to tell the secret ingredients.

  Mama sets two large gallon jugs out in the sun with water and tea bags. All of the kids are going to drink homemade sun tea and lemonade made from freshly squeezed lemons. The adults are going to get a head start on drinking beer for going out later tonight. They won’t have to spend as much money on beer when the band starts at Castle Rock Bar. Once the band begins, the price of drinks goes up.

  Aunt May and Mama have several cast-iron pans already heating up on our campfire. They are going to cook about fifteen catfish, bullheads, and Billie’s bluegill. Mama has one special pan ready to cook the frog legs in. Uncle Jimmy has his pan ready for the turtles. “Mama, I love watching you cook those frog legs. I sure can’t wait to eat one!” I say, with my mouth already starting to water.

  Those frog legs just keep jumping in the pan even without their bodies. Once, a leg jumped right out of the pan onto Mama’s kitchen floor. It almost scared poor Mama half-to-death. I couldn’t stop laughing at Mama. She usually isn’t frightened of anything.

  “Frank, I’m giving you the corn duty. All you have to do is husk the corn over in the barrel, and place the ears in the large corn boiler over the fire,” Mama directs him.

  Uncle Frank reaches into a cooler. “You’re giving me the hottest job here. I’ll need another beer first. In fact, I think I’ll just keep the cooler close to me!”<
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  Cooking is an all day event when we have our family fish fry. Everyone is expected to pitch in and do the work. Everyone except Katie, she doesn’t ever help clean any of the fish, turtles, or frogs.

  • • •

  Earlier today Aunt May and Mama prepared homemade potato salad, macaroni salad, and baked beans. They just sat in the trailer visiting, laughing, and cooking more like two best friends than sisters. They are proud of their cooking skills and rightfully so. They are the best cooks I know, and most restaurants want to hire Mama as their cook.

  Oh…those fish taste so good. They are crispy on the outside and flaky in the middle. There isn’t any fish smell or grease dripping off of any of the fish cooked. The tails are nice and crisp. But oh…the tail; it is the best part of the fish!

  “If anyone doesn’t want their fish tail, I’ll eat it!” I yell. No one answers me. I guess they all seem to like the tails as much as I do.

  “Mama, can you pass me a frog leg please?” I never get to eat very many frog legs; there usually isn’t enough for us kids. I like catfish and turtle the best anyway.

  “Dot, can you pass me another bullhead?”

  “Sure, Frank, but don’t you want to try some of the turtle?”

  “One of the turtles was chomping on Billie’s foot. I’m not eating anything that had a muddy shoe in its mouth!”

  “Frank, why does it matter? You don’t eat the mouth,” Mama says laughing. Everyone else at the table laughs at Mama too, including old Uncle Frank.

  Katie refuses to eat fish, and she certainly isn’t going to try the turtle or frog legs. She says she isn’t about to eat anything that eats worms. She loves Mama’s potato salad the best. She ate at least four helpings. She should have eaten more baked beans, and then she won’t mind sleeping in the same bedroom with me later. I eat at least three helpings of the beans. Later I plan on eating more if there is any left. I sure do love these beans, but they sure don’t like me. I almost feel sorry for Katie having to share the bedroom.