Strangers When We Meet
Page 13
Nick felt the crack in his son’s voice clear to his bones.
“Yes. You’ll be living with your mom, but you can visit me whenever it’s all right with her.”
I’m doing this for all of us, Cody. Trust me, son.
He heard another muffled sound from Rosie.
Nick thought there would be tears, but Cody sat there frozen.
“Your mother and I are good friends, Cody. That hasn’t changed and it never will. The point is, we both love you more than life itself. That’ll never change, either.
“I don’t know how long the divorce will take, but barring any complications, the attorney estimates six weeks. Under the circumstances, I can go on living here, just as we are, until it’s final, which should be around the time your school lets out.
“Or I can live in that hotel by the university until my therapy’s over, and then make a permanent move.”
“Where?” Rosie asked, her tone brittle. When Nick looked over, she was clinging to the counter with both hands.
Cody darted a glance at his father. “Doesn’t Mom know?”
“Know what?”
“You tell her, Cody.”
“Dad’s going to live in Heber.”
“Heber?”
“It’s not exactly a fait accompli, Rosie. I told you I wanted to live in the mountains. There were a couple of properties for sale in Heber. If you recall, when we were dating, we used to drive up there a lot and talk about retiring there one day.”
“I remember. It’s heavenly up there,” she whispered, still sounding dazed.
It was heavenly. But at the time, he and Rosie had been concentrating so hard on each other they scarcely knew what was going on around them.
“One of the ranches for sale seemed the perfect size and it’s got a great house on it. So I’ve put down earnest money. The old couple will be moving out by midsummer. But Cody and I want you to see it before I actually buy it.”
“Yeah. It’s really neat, Mom. We’ll be able to waterski up there with all my friends’ families. We’re going to have horses and a boat.”
“You really meant it about leaving Salt Lake.” Her voice was quiet. Haunted.
“That’s right. I knew if I didn’t at least put a hold on the place, someone else would. Of course, no decision’s going to be made until you’ve seen it and approved.”
Rosie didn’t say anything. Just stood there looking shocked.
“So, Cody,” Nick said, picking up where they’d left off, “in the meantime, shall I stay here or go to the hotel? What would make you happier in the long run?”
His head swerved to Rosie. “What do you want, Mom?”
Rosie looked on the verge of fainting. “As your father said, it’s up to you, honey.”
“Then I think you should move out, Dad. Jeff says you have a right to find a new girlfriend, too. Mom? Can we eat now? I’m hungry.”
Oh, Cody. Somehow I was hoping you’d give me an argument. Now I have to follow through, which means this will be my last night under the same roof with you and your mother….
CHAPTER NINE
ROSIE AWOKE from her restless sleep with a jolt. Something had disturbed her. Probably a nightmare, but she couldn’t remember it. The scene in the kitchen before dinner had been enough of a nightmare to last a lifetime.
Yet Cody and his father had consumed their hamburgers with enjoyment, not missing a bite as they bantered back and forth. You would never have known anything was wrong. Afterward, they’d helped her with the dishes, then left for the gym.
Rosie couldn’t stand her own company, but was strangely reluctant to call Zach. Since they’d already said their painful goodbyes, she hated the idea of calling him and starting everything all over again—when she firmly believed that Nick hadn’t meant what he said.
She couldn’t imagine that he’d really go through with the divorce. Of course she couldn’t stop him from moving out in the next few days, but she didn’t think it’d be permanent. His pride and anger had gotten in the way. When he cooled off, he’d see that Cody needed him at home.
The fact that he was waiting for her to see the property in Heber before he bought it told her that he really didn’t plan to end their marriage.
There was that noise again.
Occasionally Cody talked in his sleep. It didn’t surprise her that tonight was one of those times. He’d acted so brave at the table, but she knew he was heart-broken over the turn of events.
How could you do it, Nick? How could you shatter our son’s dreams like that?
She tried to fall back to sleep, then shot straight up in bed as the sounds grew louder.
Without wasting another second, she climbed out of bed and hurried out of the room to see what was wrong with Cody. But when she reached the hall, she realized the sounds were coming from the front of the house.
Nick!
He must have fallen asleep with the TV on. He insisted it was the only way he could relax; he usually dropped off sometime during the wee hours. She’d tried to persuade him to at least lie down in the guest bedroom, but he always refused, saying he preferred the couch.
She shut Cody’s door, then walked quickly toward the living room. But with every step the sounds became clearer. First she’d hear groans, then a voice talking at a frantic pace.
When she entered the living room and saw that the TV was off, she knew the almost inhuman noises had to be coming from Nick.
In the moonlight spilling through the windows she could see her husband crouched on the floor, wearing only his track pants, his body glistening with sweat.
To her horror his head was moving back and forth as if he were using it as a battering ram. He kept clawing at his injured arm with his right hand.
“Got to get these shackles off. Got to get out the doors, R.T. We need transportation. Got to hijack some kind of bus, going to need some weapons, need someone who speaks Arabic. Got to get out of here, R.T. Got to find out where we are. Here they come. Don’t tell them anything, R.T. Oh, God. Don’t let us die. Get us out of here. Please God, Please, God. Please, God. Please, God.”
Rosie stood transfixed as Nick repeated the same litany over and over again. When she couldn’t stand it any longer, she threw her body down next to his and gathered him in her arms.
Even when she held him against her, he continued the rocking motion. Despite his weight loss, he was in amazingly good shape. His strength terrified her because he was in a deep sleep and had no control over his movements.
“Nick…wake up, darling! It’s Rosie. Wake up!”
She took an elbow in the jaw before she managed to roll him onto his back. Now she lay on top of him, using both hands to smooth the moisture from his face and forehead. His heart was racing; his breath came in pants.
“Wake up, Nick. You’re dreaming. It’s Rosie. Wake up, my love. Come on.”
She began shaking his shoulders.
“Don’t do it, don’t do it, don’t do it…” he cried, trying to cover his ear with his arm, flinching repeatedly as if someone was beating him. His motions had thrown her down hard on her side, but she clung to him, wrapping her arms around his head, so that he was butting her chest.
Rosie was terrified because nothing was working, nothing was bringing him out of it. Years ago, when Cody was in the hospital dangerously ill with croup, the only thing that had calmed him was her singing. She’d sat on the side of his hospital bed and sung nonstop to him all night long.
Out of sheer instinct, she began singing to her husband.
“‘Away in a manger, no crib for a bed, the little Lord Jesus lay down his sweet head. The stars in the bright sky looked down where he lay, the little Lord Jesus asleep on the hay. Asleep, asleep. Asleep, asleep. Asleep…’”
Miraculously his agitation began to subside. The screams, the mutterings, faded.
Sending up a prayer of gratitude, she sang every Christmas carol she could think of until his body relaxed and he slept in her arms.
 
; For the rest of the night Rosie kept a vigil over her husband. She didn’t dare sleep in case his nightmares returned.
Around eight, she eased away from him and staggered to her feet. Every muscle in her body felt cramped. The throbbing in her jaw was bad enough to need a painkiller.
Nick lay stretched out on his side, looking peaceful. For a few moments she studied the familiar profile, the natural male grace of his long lean body. Throughout their marriage, she’d kissed every inch of it, thrilled to every inch of it. They’d shared every thought and dream. Now, seven years later, through no fault of their own, they shared something else.
She had no name for it.
There was no name for it.
Only Cynthia Ellis knew what Rosie was feeling right now because she must be living through the same kind of experience with R.T.
Rosie reached for the down comforter and carefully covered him, then tiptoed from the room to call R.T.’s wife.
“WELL, CODY? What do you think? The black Pathfinder or the green Land Rover? They’re both good for four-wheeling, and both can pull a twenty-three-foot boat.”
Nick already knew his choice, but he was curious to see if his son had the same taste in cars.
“I don’t know, Dad. They’re both awesome.”
“You’re right about that. Of course, we don’t have to decide today.”
Cody’s face fell. “But, Dad, I thought we were going to drive it off the lot.”
“First we have to make a choice. Then they have to get it ready and do all the paperwork. That doesn’t give me much time to get to my therapy session. As it is, I’ll have to drive the rental car back to Hertz and ask them to drop me off at one of the dealerships.”
“Okay. Then I say we get the Land Rover. But only if you like it.”
Nick grinned and gave Cody a hug. “Like father, like son. The Rover was my choice, too.” He liked the comfort of it and the way it handled on the road. “Let’s see if they can work us a fast deal.”
When Cody repeated Nick’s remark to the car salesman, the man said, “Since your dad’s a war hero, I’ll cut you another couple of thousand off the factory price. Not only that, I’ll have one of the guys in the garage take your rental car back for you.”
That brought a smile to Cody’s face.
Nick murmured something appropriate, but he wasn’t so thrilled. Not that he didn’t appreciate a few breaks once in a while. But in the five weeks since he’d come home, he’d been singled out every time he appeared in public. The TV spot on him had aired on the ten-o’clock news the night of the neighborhood welcome-home party. Now it seemed he was a minor celebrity.
People meant well, but he didn’t think he would ever get used to the unsolicited attention. As for children, it stung every time he saw one hiding behind a mother’s skirts, staring at his bad arm. You never knew what questions or comments would suddenly pour forth from their mouths. Adults weren’t much different.
“Oh, man. This is a beaut, Dad!” Cody said a half hour later, his voice rising with excitement. “I can’t wait to drive it.” He’d opened all the windows and turned the car radio to the K-Bear station, acting like any other teenager—enthusiastic and slightly out of control.
Nick chuckled. He could remember telling his father the same thing when he was the same age as Cody. “If your mom approves and the sale of that ranch goes through, we’ll go up to the property and I’ll teach you how to drive.”
“I want to live with you, Dad,” he said urgently.
What else is new?
“We’ve been over that ground before. You belong with your mother, but the arrangement we’ve worked out is good, isn’t it?”
“Yeah. I guess. But it seems kind of dumb. Mom and me alone in the house, and you over at the hotel.”
“That was the best decision, to give your mom her privacy.”
“But Zach never comes over!”
“Maybe that’s because you haven’t tried hard enough to make him feel welcome.” The thought horrified him clear through—this other man, welcome in Rosie’s house—but Nick said the words, anyway, knowing she had a right to the life and the man, she’d chosen.
“I don’t care anymore.”
Cody, boy. If only you could hear yourself.
“Then you need to tell your mother it’s okay, so she’ll start letting him come over.”
Cody looked genuinely troubled. “Do you really think I’m the reason he stays away?”
Nick nodded. “Now that you know, it would be cruel not to help your mom.”
Cody thought about it for a minute. “Okay. I’ll talk to her when I get home. Can I come over tonight?”
“I’m afraid not, son. I’m getting together with R.T. But tomorrow, after your class, I’ll take you and Jeff up to Heber with me. We’ll test this baby out.”
“Cool!”
The therapy lasted until six; Cody read magazines in the waiting room while Nick worked with the therapist. It was almost six-thirty by the time they got to the house, and Nick wasn’t surprised that Rosie came down the front porch steps as soon as she saw them pull into the driveway.
“Nick? Don’t drive off. I have to talk to you!” she called.
Cody jumped down and ran toward her, regaling her with a blow-by-blow account of the afternoon’s activities. His rapture over the new car was evident in the running commentary he kept up.
Though she appeared to be listening to their son, Nick could tell there was something vital on her mind. She started toward the Rover, determination in every step.
When she reached the driver’s side, she told Cody to go inside and get washed up for dinner.
Cody waved. “See you tomorrow, Dad.”
Nick waved back, then turned in Rosie’s direction.
Lord, what a sight. The sunset bathed her in golden light. It was the first time since he’d come back from the war that he’d seen her hair loose like she used to wear it. The strands glistened like cornsilk and fell halfway down her slender back.
He knew what she looked like—what she felt like—under that navy-trimmed white suit she was wearing. He knew every singing line and curve. An ache passed through his body. It was so intense he had to stifle a groan.
“How are you, Rosie?”
Her chin lifted defiantly. “Not good.”
He frowned. “What’s wrong?”
Those gorgeous angry green eyes looked as if they might shoot sparks at any minute. “A warrant was just served on me for my arrest!”
The situation wasn’t funny, but Nick fought not to smile. “Why?”
“Because I didn’t respond to the summons.”
“Why didn’t you?”
“You know why, Nick Armstrong.”
The blood pounded in his ears. Oh, Rosie, sweetheart. You’re sounding more and more like your old self. If only you wanted me the way I want you…
“Because I honestly didn’t think you’d go through with the divorce. Obviously I was wrong.” Her voice trembled, although he knew she was doing her best to cover it up.
“All you have to do is get an attorney of your own, and you won’t have anything to worry about. I’m paying the court costs, remember.”
“You can be as smug as you want,” she snapped. “But you won’t feel the same way when I slap a countersuit against you to stop the divorce.”
His heart leapt. “On what grounds?”
“Temporary insanity due to your long imprisonment.”
Nick threw back his head and laughed till his ribs hurt. He couldn’t help it. She was so adorable. Dear God. How he loved her.
“You think I won’t do it?”
By now her eyes were smoldering. Her fury was something to behold.
“That would require a psychiatric evaluation.”
“That’s right. You have special needs and require special help.”
All I need is to spend the rest of my nights in bed with you, my beloved. But…it’s never going to happen.
“
Dammit, Nick. Look at me when I’m talking to you!”
“I am looking.” I can’t look anywhere else. That’s my problem. That’s why I need to get a divorce as soon as possible. You and Zach need it, too!
“I’m serious. I want you to get some counseling and support. The last thing you should be thinking about is a divorce.”
“I had no idea you felt this strongly on the subject. May I ask what brought it on?”
“Isn’t the fact that you were a POW reason enough?” she fired back, but he had the distinct impression there was something else behind her vehemence.
“Much as I’d love to explore this more thoroughly with you, I have other plans tonight and I’m afraid I’m already late.
“Rosie,” he said on a more sober note, “tomorrow I’m planning to drive Cody up to Heber after school for a few hours. If you want, we’ll swing by your office and take you with us so you can see where I have hopes of living. He’s been anxious for you to come, so I can make a decision about buying the place.”
“I wish I could, but I have a chemistry lab on Tuesday afternoons.”
“How long does it last?”
“Till five.”
“We can wait until then to go. We could have dinner at the Wagon Wheel. That’ll give Cody time to get his homework done. Think about it. Tomorrow he can tell me what you decide. Good night.”
Her face closed up, and he couldn’t tell what she was thinking. “Good night.”
All the way back to the hotel, Nick reflected on the subtle changes in his wife since he’d arrived at Hill. From shock and a distanced pity to…what? Intensity, unselfishness, determination. Just now she’d seemed more like the Rosie he’d left behind. But he understood all too well that it was because she felt sorry for him and didn’t want to hurt him.
I can’t hang on to you knowing deep down that you’re in love with Zach, Rosie. I can’t!
Nick spotted R.T. in the lobby talking to one of the clerks at the reception desk. Even from this distance, he could see that his friend seemed to be putting on weight as fast as he was.
“Rutherford Topham, I presume? My, my, what civilization has wrought. Chinos and a polo shirt, no less.”