Feel Like Makin' Love (Rock and Roll Trilogy #3)

by Stewart, Barbara

“Yes, it is,” she said as he pulled her to him in a hug.

  “Thank you,” he said and she looked at him in question. “For being here, with me,” he added.

  “At this moment, I can’t imagine anywhere else in the world that I could possibly feel this happy.”

  He looked at his watch; “Is it too early to call and see how she’s feeling?”

  It was 7:30. “Just a little,” Geni laughed.

  “Then come with me,” Andy said, and led her back to the bed.

  ~ ~ ~

  Christmas morning Andy and Geni went to Matthew and Carlee’s. Carlee felt excited – proud as a peacock standing in the kitchen. “Good morning! Merry Christmas!” she said as they entered.

  “Wow, something smells good!” Andy said wrapping her in his arms.

  “It’s eggs, and bacon, and sausage, and cheddar cheese, and gruyere cheese, and sourdough bread!” she said in a happy voice, ticking the recipe items off in her head.

  “That’s a lot of ‘ands,’” he laughed.

  “We went to the grocery yesterday, and I put it all together last night. You let it sit overnight and then bake it – something I knew my papa would like. Oh, and as Hatchet would say, ‘the hubs too,’” she laughed, and Andy thought the sound was glorious.

  He looked closely at her - always a beauty in his eyes – but this morning there was something different. She’d swept her hair deeper to the side to cover the surgical site and held in place with a rhinestone clip, but that wasn’t it. She was wearing make-up for the first time in weeks, and she looked flawless, but he didn’t think that was it either. She wore slim black slacks and a shirt of azure that seemed to be made just for her. She was getting breakfast ready for them, but she was wearing the cuff bracelet that Matthew had given her for her birthday, along with the earrings she’d worn at the wedding. And then he looked at her feet and smiled – she was wearing a pair of yellow fuzzy slippers that she’d had forever. He watched her a moment more and realized that she was just happy, and it made her glow. He saw Matthew watching him out of the corner of his eye and turned to him with a smile.

  Matthew knew his thoughts, because as many times as he had looked at her in their time together he could only remember once when she looked more beautiful… their wedding.

  Geni had the ingredients for mimosas and looked to Matthew for guidance.

  “She’s on no meds through the holiday; Tamara said to let her celebrate!”

  Andy popped the cork on the champagne, and Geni found a pitcher and mixed. Andy took out crystal glasses from the hutch, and Geni rinsed them and filled the glasses while Matthew removed the casserole from the oven and carried it to the table. Finally, they sat down to eat.

  Andy raised his glass and said, “To health and happiness.”

  Matthew raised his and said, “To my beautiful wife being home.”

  Carlee took her turn and said, “To love and all that it means.”

  Geni simply said, “To life.”

  “Here, here!” they all said.

  Andy took a bite of the casserole and made one big yummy noise, and Carlee laughed.

  ~ ~ ~

  Later they moved to the living room, and Matthew helped her get settled on the sofa. They all noticed that she moved slowly and tired easily, so getting her in a comfortable spot was key. They began to open gifts. Geni gave Carlee a box full of scarves meant to cover the place they’d shaved on her head.

  “I love them,” she said when she found a variety of colors and designs inside the box. “I’ve had a time trying to cover it, and after a while, the clips give me a tad of a headache.” She took a scarf that had the same blue as her shirt in it and removed the clip from her hair, tying the scarf around her head like a headband.

  “Beautiful!” Matthew said.

  Andy took Carlee a small jewelry box to her to open. The label read, To Matthew and Carlee. She opened the box, and Andy noticed the trembling fingers that removed the contents.

  “Papa,” she said with a voice that matched the fingers that trembled as she spoke. “The mizpah charms.”

  He looked at her, and the smile on his face was bittersweet. Carlee began to cry. Geni looked on and saw the chain Andy had worn since she’d known him, the necklace she’d seen dangle from his neck as they’d made love the first time and then noticed it missing the next time.

  “I thought it was something that would mean something to you, a sentiment to share with Matthew; I should have given it to you when you were in the hospital,” he said and shot a glance Geni’s way. “But since Matthew never left, it seemed to be a misplaced thought.”

  Carlee sat quietly, having her own bittersweet moment. She knew how special this gift was, but she also knew that it meant he was ready to move on. She didn’t think it meant that he was leaving her mama behind, just that he was ready to move forward. Finally, she thought.

  She looked deeper; there was a more delicate chain in a small bag. She took the heavier chain and slipped one of the halves of the charm off the heavy chain. She turned to place the heavier one around Matthew’s neck. “I love you, forever,” she whispered in his ear as she hugged him. She handed him the one meant for her, and he slipped it around her neck and said, “I love you right back.”

  She rose and went to where Andy was sitting and dropped into his lap, her arms around his neck. He pulled her closer. “Sweet girl,” he said and paused, “Woman…” he nuzzled her neck, and they held each other a moment. Andy felt her giving him permission to love again.

  “I love you, Papa.”

  ~ ~ ~

  Matthew seemed anxious for her to open his gift. As she watched him, she remembered the Butterfly Camp book from their first Christmas. Finally, he went behind the tree and pulled out a large flat package. She watched him and noticed that it seemed heavy. A picture, she thought.

  He placed it in front of her, and she looked up at him. “Well, pull the paper off so you can see what it is,” he smiled.

  She began ripping paper, and suddenly a soft gasp escaped her lips. “Oh my goodness…” She sat a moment, her hand over her mouth, just gazing at the image before her. Andy and Geni were curious to see what it was that left her speechless, but they waited for her to share. It was something special, and they both knew it.

  Matthew leaned to kiss her and, with a big smile, whispered in her ear, “Are you going to share?”

  Finally, she nodded, and Matthew turned the picture around for them to see.

  Geni too, let out a gasp, but said nothing. They’d all seen the picture of Carlee in the hat with the field of poppies in the background, but this was the ad for the perfume, and in the larger size it was even more stunning.

  “Wow,” Andy said. “Who the hell is that beautiful woman?”

  “My beautiful wife,” Matthew said proudly. “I got the call about a week ago, but I wanted to surprise you. Diego Aceveda wants to use this!”

  “So this is the ad?” Carlee asked as he walked the picture over to lean it against a chair at the dining room table so they could all see it.

  “It’s the first run, a prototype that we are coming to agreement on. Enhanced… it’s so clear and crisp. When they sent it to me I immediately sent it for print. It could change, but they don’t seem to think it will. I printed it because I kinda can’t stop looking at it,” he laughed.

  He sat on the sofa beside her, and Carlee snuggled closer. “It’s so beautiful, and I know exactly where we will hang it. Thank you, Matthew, I love it.”

  More gifts were exchanged: jewelry, clothing, music, the usual Christmas kind of gifts, and finally there was one more from Andy to Carlee. She’d noticed that he’d been watching the clock the last thirty minutes or so and wondered. She opened the small box to find a piece of paper.

  Log on to the computer (not the laptop – the big one), it read, so she climbed the stairs with Matthew as Andy and Geni followed. She turned it on and waited, looking over her shoulder at Andy. A moment later there was a noise like a teleph
one ringing, and she looked at the screen. She pressed the button that said ACCEPT and waited. A moment later, Nanny and Pops filled the screen.

  “Oh my goodness! Look how beautiful you are!” Nanny cried. As always, Pops sat quietly with a smile on his face. He was a man of few words, but when he did say something, it was genuine, love-filled, and it made you happy to hear it.

  “No, look how beautiful you are!” Carlee said and felt tears rush to her eyes.

  “Andy sent us a new bigger computer so we can see you!” Pops said.

  “Oh, the two of you look so good. I miss you so much!” Carlee cried.

  They’d gotten to the point where they didn’t feel comfortable traveling. The trip for the wedding had worn them out, so Carlee hadn’t seen them since her trip home in August to go to camp.

  Geni watched as Carlee and Matthew shared conversation with them and thought once more what an exceptional woman Carlee was. She’d been gracious and appreciative of every gift she’d opened. Aside from the picture from Matthew, the two gifts that were the most meaningful to her were the charms and a new computer for Nanny and Pops. She thought about her growing up with the ability to buy most anything she could have dreamed, but it didn’t appear that money was the most important thing to her. She thought about the passion that Matthew had told her about from day one; she’d experienced it herself. She looked around as Carlee and Matthew continued their visit and saw items that she knew they’d picked up at a second-hand store mixed in with the newer ones that they needed. Finally she whispered that she was going to go downstairs. A moment later, she heard Andy talk with Nanny and Pops, and then he came downstairs too.

  When he reached for her, Geni stepped into his arms. “Thank you for all of this,” she whispered in his ear as he held her.

  “What, all of what?” he asked.

  “Just you,” she said, and he held her tighter.

  ~ ~ ~

  Later, Matthew and Andy were engrossed in something on the TV, and, as Geni prepared the evening meal, Carlee sat at the counter and they talked. “You amaze me,” Geni said.

  “I do?” Carlee laughed.

  “You do. Excluding the picture of the perfume ad – which is amazing, by the way - the gift that seemed most precious to you was that Nanny and Pops got a new computer, something that wasn’t really a gift to you.”

  “Oh, but it is a gift for me. To see their faces is a treasure... I miss them so much. My biggest fear is that something will happen before I can travel home and see them, hug them, and kiss them.” She had to pause a moment before she could continue. “I look at Nanny sometimes and I wonder what my mama would have been like as an older woman. I feel so cheated sometimes.... Geni, now that you and Papa are a couple, I hope it doesn’t bother you when I talk about my mama.”

  “Carlee, I've already learned that she will be part of my life too. Just as Tom is the father of my boys, he will always be part of our lives. I admit in the beginning I worried about our ghosts because I think I know what Beth meant to Andy, and I know that Tom was everything to me, but I think I know, at least I feel like I know, what Andy and I share. It’s still so new.”

  “Do you love him?”

  “I do,” Geni smiled.

  “He loves you.”

  “And how do you know this?” she asked as she pulled a pan of lasagna from the oven.

  “Just the way he looks at you. It’s that love-look. I see it when Matthew looks at me.” She smiled and added, “I hope he sees it when I look at him.”

  Later, lying in bed, wrapped in Andy’s arms, Geni turned to face him. “Look at me.”

  “It’s my pleasure to accommodate this request.” And even in the dark, she saw the smile that teased the corners of his mouth. She looked deep in his eyes, drawing in the warmth of them, that golden hue that seemed to illuminate the room, and she saw it, too. She snuggled closer and lightly pressed her lips to his. “Good night, Andy.”

  “Wait,” he laughed pulling her closer. “What was that about?”

  “I just needed to look at you, and you had to look at me for me to see what I need.”

  “And that was?”

  “Love.”

  ~ ~ ~

  Kyliejo called the day after Christmas, and Carlee was excited to hear from her. “Well, hello my friend!”

  “Hello, I just called to check on you.”

  Carlee stifled a giggle. “I’m fine, how are you?”

  “I feel good.”

  “Wonderful! Did you have a good Christmas?” Carlee asked, stepping lightly. She knew Kyliejo was at the age when she herself began to question the existence of ‘Santa.’

  “It was great! Santa left me so many presents! I love to draw and color, and he left me a big box full of colored pencils and a big pad of paper to draw on with them!”

  “I would love to see your drawings!”

  “I’ll show you,” she said, and her blasé tone had Carlee giggling. “Guess what Mum gave me for Christmas?”

  “You’re going to have to tell me because I can’t even begin to imagine!”

  “She told me your papa was famous, and she got me a disc of some songs he sings.”

  “She did?”

  “Uh hunh. I never heard of Traveler, but now I think I love them!”

  “I do too!” Carlee laughed.

  “I love Zane, but I think I love Traveler more now.”

  Zane Rogers she thought.

  “Well, I better go and let you rest,” she said and Carlee smiled. “I just wanted to make sure you are feeling good,” the girl said.

  “I feel even better now,” Carlee said with a laugh. “Bye sweet friend…”

  “Wait, Mum wants to talk to you.”

  “Hello; I hope you don’t mind her calling you.”

  “Never! I adore her!”

  “You’re Andy Stevens daughter, right?” Johanna asked.

  “I am,” she replied proudly.

  “I read in the London Times about you soon after you were at London Royal, but I wanted to respect your privacy. After I read it, I played some of the Traveler music, and she loved it.” Carlee could visualize Kyliejo listening.

  “Thank you again for taking the time to be kind to Kyliejo.”

  “It’s easy. Others were so kind and giving to me when I lost my mom and then my birth father. It’s easy to return that,” she said.

  Matthew sat beside her on the sofa. “That sounded like a good phone call,” he said when she hung up.

  “Kyliejo,” she said.

  ~ ~ ~

  “Hey, New Year’s Eve is in three days; I was thinking you might want to get out of here for a little while. Would you like to go out to eat or something?”

  “No,” she said and turned to face him. “I’d rather we have our own celebration right here.”

  “Should I invite Mom and Andy?”

  “No,” she said quickly. “We only have a week before treatment starts. I want this time alone with you. You can tell them whatever you want, but I just want you.”

  “You want me?” he said cocking his head. His smoky blue-gray eyes, dark and mysterious, looked at her in a way that sent a shiver up her spine.

  “Well, I’m not sure that’s what I meant when I said it, but I believe it’ll be all I can think about now,” she replied and melted into his arms.

  “Carlee, have I told you that just being in the same room with you makes me want you…”

  “I love you like crazy, Matthew Davis.”

  “Yes, Carlee, yes you do…”

  ~ ~ ~

  In their flat, Andy and Geni were sitting at the dining room table. They were still in the process of settling in; the dining room was a gathering place, but as Andy remembered, it always had been. Phyllis’s table had been one of the most important places in his life; many conversations had been shared there, and he always loved that place. And then he thought about his own table and the many times he and Carlee had sat talking over many subjects through the years.


  “I’m going out on a limb here and assuming that Carlee isn’t gonna want to go out to celebrate. I don’t want them feeling obligated to entertain us when I’m sure they would enjoy being alone. How about an evening out; I don’t believe we’ve been on a real date yet?”

  “Date?” Geni laughed.

  “Yes, date. Let’s go out and have some fun.”

  “Why, that sounds divine! Where should we go?”

  “Let me surprise you,” he said taking their empty glasses to the kitchen.

  “It seems that you do that on a regular basis,” she laughed.

  “Oh, you just don’t know,” he said looking over his shoulder, cocking his brow in a suggestive way.

  “Stop it!” she laughed.

  “And if I don’t?” he said taking her hand, pulling her from the chair and into his arms. His left hand found the small of her back and tugged lightly, leaving her body touching his in places that left her breathless. His free hand found its way under her hair, gently caressing her neck, drawing her into him for a kiss. When her breath hitched, the kiss deepened, and he felt her go limp in his arms. He felt passion stir and knew that she wanted him as much as he wanted her. He released her and took her hand, leading her to the bedroom, flipping lights out as they made their way there.

  “Please don’t,” she whispered.

  He drew back to look at her, questioningly.

  “Stop, please don’t stop,” she laughed.

  “Whew, Geni. ‘Cuz I don’t think I could.”

  “Good,” she said unbuttoning his shirt, sliding her hands down his chest to the opening of his jeans. She was taking the lead. She was initiating this romantic moment. She wanted to be the one in control.

  “Geni,” he said.

  “Shh,” she whispered against his neck as her hands pushed the jeans down over his hips. “I haven’t done this in years. Let me. Don’t talk. Just let me…”

  Chapter Eleven

  With Geni and Andy planning a date for New Year’s Eve, Matthew set about making his own plan for the evening. He called his friend for suggestions, and Cook was happy to advise him.