Love, Laughter, and Happily Ever Afters Collection (Eight Fun, Romantic Novels by Eight Bestselling Authors)
Page 26
âAnd most of all, sheâd really, really hated being a motherâ¦specifically our mother.â
Brian took her hand. âHoney, Iâm sure that wasnât true.â
She shrugged sadly. âNo, probably not. But she sure said it a lot to me. When she would remember me, that is. But I couldnât blame her. Look at all she had to do. She didnât have time to play with me, let alone remember my birthday or buy me Christmas presents. And with my dad working two jobs just to keep food on the table and medical bill collectors off of us month to month, I couldnât go whine to him about it either. Not when Willow was there being just the best big sister a girl could ask for, even while she was suffering through the most horrible disease.â
Tessa remembered often how guilty sheâd felt the few times sheâd resented her sister. Moments of weakness, followed by several lifetimes of shame. For Tessa, there had been no one to take it all out onâ¦so sheâd taken it out on herself.
âFrom there, the start of my teen years was like a bad made-for-TV movieâhanging out with the wrong crowd, trying pot, skipping school, doing every stupid, self-destructive thing a kid could doâ¦including having sex before I was ready.â
When she felt Brian tense in remembered rage beside her, she just focused on keeping down the bile that rose up to her throat whenever she thought about that night.
âWhat Gavin said about pulling a trainâthat simply wasnât true. There was no way I wouldâve done anything like what he described. That night at the lakes was my first time. Iâd been drunk, and Iâd been hurtâ¦drunk mainly because Iâd been hurting. But instead of getting the guy who waited for me outside of the church so he could give me a birthday cake with sixteen candles, I got the guy who took my virginity on top of an old blanket on the ground. The part that he did get right was when he said those two other girls at the party threw up all over the placeâ¦namely, on me.â
Head hanging down in shame, she finished, âAnd for the memorable finale, I went home later to find that my sister had been taken to the ER that night and had almost died.â
âMy mom couldnât even look at me, couldnât understand why I was doing this to her, when she was going through so much to keep my sister alive. And to this day, Iâll never forget hearing her say to my dad, âWhy couldnât it have been Tessa? Why did God have to punish Willow with JHD?ââ
Vicious anger slashed across Brianâs expression.
Tessa, meanwhile, just wrapped her arms around her middle, feeling the kick to the stomach those two shouted sentences had been, as if it had just happened yesterday.
âItâs not like I havenât asked myself the same question. Willow had all the promise, all the perfection. And yet she was the one to get JHD. It wasnât fair.â
Reaching up to wipe away the single, tear that had managed to break free and slide down her cheek, Brian whispered almost harshly, âIt wouldâve been equally unfair if youâd been the one with JHD, sweetheart.â
Tessa laughed bitterly at that. âNo. It wouldnât have been. And whatâs more, my mother would never have ended up the way she did if it had been me instead.â An almost sympathetic sadness hit her as it always did when she remembered how broken her mom had become by then. âIn that moment, then and there at the hospital after hearing her say that, I decided that my mother deserved the chance to be free. Free from the motherhood sheâd come to hate so much, free from the husband sheâd eventually have to watch suffer through adult-onset HD.â
â…And free from me.â
She met his eyes for the first time since starting the morbid replay of her childhood. âSo that was why I dropped out. I got my GED the summer after my sophomore year, went to the bakery near our house and begged the woman whoâd always been so kind to me and Willow to train and hire me. Between my dad and me, we made a plan to have Willowâs care completely under control by the end of the summer. And by Labor Day, my mom was a free woman, living halfway across the country from us, blissfully carefree.â
At his infuriated expressionâyes, something like that would upset a wonderful parent like Brianâshe added, âBut itâs okay. I made sure Willow and my dad were better off without her. I took care of them, did everything she only deigned to do, but better. I loved them and filled their lives with as much life as I could.â She took in a deep, steadying breath. âAnd later, when my mom needed money to get back on her feet, I took care of her too. Just because she didnât want to be my mom, didnât mean I was going to stop being her daughter.â
She had to look away. The sympathy in Brianâs eyes was too much. Pity, she was used to, even disdain and recrimination like during high school. But genuine, more-feeling-than-thought sympathy…never.
He tipped her chin up gently but firmly and brought her gaze level with his.
âYou, Tessa Daniels, are even more amazing than even I can believe.â
WITHOUT ANOTHER THOUGHT, and no further notice, he hauled her into his arms and took possession of her lips in a deep, sinking kiss that had an uncontainable growl thrashing out of his chest. The woman wasnât just amazing, she was intoxicating.
She was his.
The feeling of finally having her in his arms filled him with a bone-deep comfort and reckless need all in one. Her lips parted for him and he tried, really he did, to gentle his kiss, to slow things down. But she was consuming him whole.
Control nearly shot, he pulled back a bit to simply stare at her as she unraveled in his arms. He watched her teeth bite into her lower lip, watched her eyes become drowsy with desire and darken to almost black as he skimmed up the hem of her shirt. Just a sliver of an inch. Just enough for his calloused fingers to feel the smooth silk of her back.
The tiny little gasp that escaped her was his undoing.
His lips couldnât help but fall back to claim hers again. Fully this time. With no restraint, no end in sight. Her every reaction was a revelation, her every open, honest response simply high-octane fuel that fed his arousal. He rubbed his fingers over the base of her spine slowly and drank in all the tiny sounds he was sure she didnât realize she was making. Her body softened against his then, sinking into him as if her every pleasure was his alone.
And he was lost.
She was burning alive under his touch and more than anything, more than his next breath, he wanted to drown in that fire, bring it to a full-blown inferno that consumed them both whole.
…But not tonight.
âBabe we canât,â he somehow managed to punch out. Voice gravelly, he drew his hands back to safer territory and said roughly, âYou’re hurting and your emotions have gone through the wringer tonight. I can’t take advantage of you like that.â
And yet still, he couldnât bear to let her go completely.
âThen don’t,â she replied simply, arms twining around his shoulders. âLet me take advantage of you.â
Jerking back to put some head-clearing distance between them was about as painful as ripping off his own skin.
âSweetheart, why donât we just hang out tonight? We can sit and talk more about those dickheads we ran into tonight if itâll help. Or we could just watch a movieâ¦anything you want to do.â
He quickly snatched her wandering hands as they traveled down his lats and started tugging at the hem of his t-shirt.
âAnything except that,â he groaned. âWork with me here, woman.â Raggedly, he put his forehead against hers and counted to ten to try and find the tattered remains of his restraint.
The thought almost made him laugh. Who was he kidding? He had no restraint when it came to Tessa. By the fifth second, his lips had already found their way back to hers.
And goddammit if her whole body didnât just tremble right there in his arms.
She was just so mind-wreckingly responsive. As usual, without even trying, she was driving him batshit crazy.
Tapping into a reserve even he didnât know he had, he broke off the kiss and took another step away from her.
Then he watched in sad disbelief as her expression became completely shuttered a half an instant laterâclosing him out behind the walls of a now ten-story castle and a moat filled with fire-breathing piranhas.
The lightning quick response time of her defenses was a punch to his gut, a tragic reminder of how much sheâd been through, how hard sheâd had to fight to not let it all destroy her.
âLook Brian, if you don’t want to, you can just tell me you know. I just thought we had something and we could have a great night exploring it. But hey, Iâm a big girl. You don’t have to make excuses to let me down easy.â
He gave her a look that said he wondered about her IQ before grabbing her hand and dragging it over the zipper of his jeans. âDoes that feel like I don’t want to?â
Her eyes widened, and her grip closed tight around him.
Bourbon-soaked shards of glass went hissing down his throat. âFor chrissakes, stop.â The blood supply in his brain was dipping down to a dangerous low.
And the damn temptress was clearly all torn up about it.
He glared at the smile she was biting back. âIâm glad you find this so amusing.â
âItâs not amusement; itâs relief. Here I was thinking it was just me getting affected with my perpetually wet panties around you and all.â
A seriously pained groan escaped him then. âTo preserve my sanityâand your pantiesâdonât use the word wet in any more sentences tonight.â
She sighed. âI really don’t know why you’re making such a big deal out of this. Itâs just sex. Iâm not looking for anything serious. You heard Gavin earlier this evening. Being the âgood girlâ was never exactly my thing.â She brushed up against the hardening ridge tenting his jeans to drive home her point.
With a muttered curse, he clamped one arm around her waist and tangled his free hand in her hair. âSweetheart, this thing between us is a big deal,â he said roughly, tugging gently on her hair and nearly losing it when she arched her back in response. Her fitted tee was so paper-frickinâ-thin. One sharp yank was all itâd take to rip it right down the middle.
Good lord, he needed to find some control.
âWhether this thing between us lasts one night or ten, whenâand yes I said when we have sexâIâll make damn sure that every single second of it seeps into your bones, burns into your memory, and turns into a relentless craving that makes you forget all the assholes from your past.â He ran his lips along the thrumming pulse at her throat.
âAnd if Iâm really lucky, itâll also help ruin you for all other men completely.â
CHAPTER SIX
TOO LATE. She was already irreparably ruined, addicted.
Hopeful.
The latter being the scariest part of it all.
Because for the first time in her adult life, she was actually hoping that there really was such a thing as a happily ever after for a girl like herâ¦
And a nice guy who calls the very next day.
Because he did. Just to see how her day had been. A few days after that? Same thing. By the weekâs end, the only thing that had kept Tessa from thinking about Brian nonstop was the sheer volume of work sheâd had.
Tessa rarely left her weekly editor duties until Friday but it had been unavoidable this week. They were having an unusually busy spring season on the catering end of things with one corporate function every few days, not to mention all the grant deadlines and other projects that she was working on with Connorâs pro bono team. She was just thankful she didnât have to worry about the summer edition of AZ Hotspots for another few weeksâthere were just not enough hours in the day.
Halfway through checking next weekâs online layout and the selection of articles for AZ Potluckâs spotlight focus on cooking with spring veggies and fruits, Tessa almost hit the ceiling when her phone rang. It was her landline, and the jarring clang echoing in her apartment wasnât a sound she heard very often.
âHello?â
âDo you have plans tonight?â
A warm buzz filled her veins. She wasnât sure why she liked the fact that he didnât bother to say who it was but she did. It wasâ¦intimate, somehow. And very Brian. âDepends. Are you planning on ruining me for all other men tonight?â
Silence.
She sat there and smiled, waiting him out.
âWould you come over if I said yes?â he rasped out, calling her bluff.
Two could play at that game. âYes.â
âJesus Christ, woman.â
She chuckled. For a first attempt at flirting, sheâd say that was pretty successful. âIâm actually working tonight. Why? Whatâs going on?â
âJust wanted to hang out with you if you were free,â he replied, sounding disappointed. âThe girls are having their sleepover here tonight, and normally Iâd make them sloppy joes or have a Mexican night, but since the weatherâs warming up, they decided they wanted to camp out back instead. You sure you canât make it? Weâre doing our famous takeout smorgasbord. We each get to pick one or two of our favorite takeout items and we have ourselves a little buffet.â
Tessa was tempted. âLucky kids. Iâve always wanted to go camping.â
His voice warmed. âDamn. Iâd say we could pitch a tent as well but my yardâs not that big. And Iâm not entirely sure Iâd be able to behave myself.â
Wow. Clearly, he was much better at the flirting thing than she was; her mind was doing somersaults.
âWe could go camping for real one of these weekends,â he offered then, his voice smiling as he added, âIâd see to it that neither one of us would have to worry about behaving.â
Now the silence was on her part.
âThat was mean,â she said when her vocal cords finally started working again.
Chuckling, he assured her, âWasnât trying to be. I find you make it hard for me to think before talking.â
Oh. Well then they were even. âIâll take a very eager rain check on the camping. Sadly, Iâve actually never even been on a vacation, let alone one in the woods. I usually just work all the time. Enter tonight as exhibit A.â
âYeah, Connor mentioned youâre a workaholic. Say, why donât you bring your work here? I should probably do some grading anyhow. And the girls usually donât resurface until at least nine the next morning. You wouldnât even have to bring a takeout dish. Weâll have plenty of food.â
Geez, he was making it so hard to say no. The food part yes, but also the part about their working alongside each other. It sounded so���nice.
âI donât know,â she waffled. âThis week has been so crazy with a midweek catering event and two grant revisions for a new HD clinical trial we werenât prepared for. My to-do list for AZ Potluck alone will probably keep me chained to my desktop until at least eight maybe.â
âSo come over after. Thatâs around when the girls eat on the weekends anyway. Say yes, Tessa. I like spending time with you. Iâve been thinking about you all week.â
Definitely ruined for all other men.
âOkay, yes. And you can put me down for takeout veggie paella.â
*
âIâLL CALL ABBY and ask her to stay here with you two,â said Brian firmly, as he filled up his plate with food and took a seat at the table across from Tessa. âI have third quarter open house conferences until late that night. And since Beckyâs folks are going to be there too for Beckyâs classes, you girls would be unchaperoned until a
fter nine oâclock.â He shook his head. âNo can do, Sky-bug.â
Seeing his daughter wind up with what looked to be a hell of a pitch, he settled in for a fast one.
âDad, Iâm almost fourteen. I can totally stay home alone. Beckyâs older sister used to babysit Becky and her little brother when she was fourteen.â
Becky echoed that last rebuttal point, her expression serious, her fast-bobbing head silently cheering her friend on for all thirteen-year-old girls everywhere.
âDuring the day, sure,â Brian volleyed back, glad that heâd done his research for this particular battleâthe girls seemed to forget that parents actually talk to each other when their children are busy plotting. âBut that was never at night. Again, sorry, kiddo. Discussion closed. We can pick this argument up again when you actually are fourteen.â
Game, set, match.
Skylar sighed in a youâre-lucky-I-love-you way and the two girls grabbed their plates and headed out back to their fully stockpiled tent, Becky praising Skylar for being so close this time.
Tessa just chuckled, waiting until the girls slid the patio door shut before teasing, âDo you honestly believe youâre going to suddenly be able to loosen those apron strings next year?â
He gave her a look that cried out Judas, and she chuckled even louder, miming the zipping of her mouth shut and throwing away the key.
âHa!â he let out in disbelief. âIf I thought that had any chance of working, Iâd steal that invisible key and bury it in my pocket.â
Brian watched as Tessa paused in surprise and then tipped her head back to laugh so hard she almost fell off her chair. Heâd never seen her without those colorful weekly-changing streaks in her hairâwithout it, her ink-black hair framed her face with a softness that made her look more delicate, vulnerable. Infinitely more memorable.
And when she laughed. Jesus. The effect could stop traffic.