The Price: Greyson and Sasha's Story (A Novel Addition to The Terms Duet)
Page 16
Did he mean what he said about being with me for the rest of his life? Maybe I shouldn’t have confessed my feelings. Perhaps it was too soon, but after all he’s done for me, he deserved to know.
***
“I’m unsure if it’s a good time to tell you this or not, but I’m hoping it will ease your mind,” Camilla says as we look at dresses in a bridal shop.
“What’s that?”
“Ellis found out Christopher agreed to a plea deal, which is good news in my opinion. None of us will have to speak at a trial, and although he’s getting a lesser sentence, the fact he murdered Tony, shot you and tried to kidnap Liam means he still won’t be released until he’s elderly. It’s possible he could even die in prison.”
I keep looking through the rack of dresses, and she adds, “I worried that telling you would stir up more unpleasant memories, but on the other hand, I thought it might be a relief to hear.”
“It is a relief. Greyson told me Ellis also found out that Rusty’s going to jail for several years since he violated probation for the umpteenth time. That’s good news, too.” I hold up a chiffon dress to show her.
“How do you feel about this pale pink one? I love the heart-shaped bodice and how it’s strapless. Do you think the long length keeps it elegant enough for a wedding? Particularly a Burke wedding?”
“It’s beautiful, but I want you pick a dress because you love it, not because you feel you have to impress the Burkes and their friends.”
“The color reminds me of the pink magnolia trees in your yard. They’re not abundant here like they are in South Carolina. I miss them sometimes.”
“You should try it on.”
“I think I will.” I flip through the long, horizontal rack to be sure I didn’t miss something I might like. I feel Camilla’s eyes on me, so I look to my right where she’s standing. “What’s wrong?”
She’s biting her lip. “I know this isn’t the place to discuss it, but you haven’t breathed a word about what happened yesterday.”
“That’s because I’m handling it now.” I fold the dress over my arm. “Look, I’m sorry. As soon as you got in the car today, I should’ve thanked you again for coming over yesterday. Our talk really helped me. I guess I’m trying to move on like you said I should do.”
“I did say that, but at the same time, I don’t want you to mentally block out the fact it happened.”
“I’m not. Greyson and I talked about it a little last night while we watched movies and binged on unhealthy food, and we discussed it again this morning after we made love.” I grin, and she covers her ears.
“OK, it sounds like you’re feeling better, but I want to remind you that you can talk to me about your therapy.”
“I know”–I hold up the dress again and grin–“and that’s why I’m willing to wear this as I stand before a bunch of pretentious people I don’t know next Saturday.”
“I’m sorry. I know it’s a lot to ask of you right now, and you have to meet Greyson’s family, too.”
“Don’t be sorry. I’m excited about your wedding and the birthday party. It’s going to be an amazing day. I’m sure of it.”
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Greyson
Sasha places her hand on my knee to still it. I’ve been tapping my foot fast, and I’m guessing it’s bugging her.
“Are you sure you want to sit through the session with me?”
“Yes, I’d rather be inside with you than out here, worrying that you’re upset and need me. Do you still want me to go in with you?”
“Yes, very much so.”
I watch a woman’s young son take a drink from the water fountain for the tenth time, and Sasha and I have only been here for fifteen minutes.
If the kid doesn’t contract a virus, it’ll be a miracle since he keeps putting his mouth over the entire nozzle.
The door opens, and Mrs. Bower exits with a young man who looks about my age. The kid across from us runs to him from the water fountain and wraps his arms around the man’s legs.
“Daddy, Daddy,” he says as the guy attempts to talk to Sasha’s therapist. I shake my head as I imagine Ellis with three kids the same damn age, along with Liam, all trying to drink from a germ-infested water fountain. I need a hazmat suit for when those little shits arrive.
“Sasha, are you ready?” Mrs. Bower asks. I stand up after my girl and follow her to the door.
“If it’s OK, Greyson’s going to sit in on my session today.” Her therapist looks at me and gives a hesitant smile. I imagine she’s wondering if I’m going to bark at her again.
“As long as you’re both comfortable with it, that’s perfectly fine.”
Sasha nods and starts down the hallway, so I follow her. Once Mrs. Bower enters her office, she motions toward two chairs. Sasha takes the one closest to the door, so I sit in the other one.
“Our introduction was brief the last visit, so I want to properly introduce myself. I’m Mrs. Katherine Bower, but you can call me Katherine.”
I stand and stretch my hand out to shake hers.
“Greyson Burke.”
As Katherine looks through a file in her lap, I tap my foot again.
“Sasha, you look like you’re feeling better.”
“I am.”
“Can I ask why you decided to have Mr. Burke join us today?”
“There are a couple of reasons. First, I wanted him to see that you’re kind to me while I’m here so he’ll worry less, and second, I want him to better understand my story. I put him through a lot the other day, and it was partly due to how little I’d told him.”
Sasha turns her head to face me. “I don’t think he should know all the details of my past, but he needs to understand how it’s made me the person I am today.”
“How do you feel about sitting in on her session, Mr. Burke?”
I take hold of Sasha’s hand. “She was in bad shape after we left here. I felt blindsided since I had no idea what she’d disclosed to you. I know I can’t be in every one of her sessions, but I felt she could use my support today since it’s so soon after the last visit. I want to be here for her.”
“You sound very supportive of Sasha.”
“He is supportive. He’s also hardworking, smart and responsible. I can’t say it enough; all that he teaches me makes me a better person.”
Katherine stares at Sasha, then me, and back to Sasha again.
“Sasha, since our first session, I’ve noticed that you give a great deal of credit to Mr. Burke. Do you ever acknowledge your many accomplishments as your own?” She holds her hand out, and I’m damn curious where she’s going with this.
“It’s obvious Mr. Burke is loving and wants what’s best for you, and you said he’s given you a great deal of support and guidance, but I feel it’s important for you to recognize your own abilities and admirable qualities and not become heavily dependent on a partner.”
“I tell Sasha all the time that she should think more of herself, but she doesn’t listen.”
“Mr. Burke, someone who’s been made to feel worthless, especially throughout childhood, is unlikely to take your word for it or accept it at face value.
“Sasha needs to trust her judgment, and that can only happen if she’s able to make her own decisions and see the successes and failures that come from those choices.
“For example, you can tell her a thousand times a day that she can handle a difficult situation, but until she’s allowed to do that several times on her own, she has no reason to believe it.” She pauses, and I make sense of what she said.
“Your ability to give her opportunities in life is wonderful, but if Sasha becomes dependent on you, which is an entirely different thing, then she’s also at your mercy.
“Instead of learning to trust in herself, she’ll be relying on you to run her life and keep her happy. That means she’ll also fear that you might take away that life and happiness. That leaves Sasha right where she was before meeting you.”
“
But I’m not going anywhere. I love her.”
She smirks. “Face value, Mr. Burke. Wouldn’t you rather know Sasha believes that statement because she thinks she’s deserving of your love and trusts her own judgment about you?”
“Damn, you’re good, and I understand this is important, but shouldn’t we be talking about what Sasha’s been through?” I ask.
“What do you think, Sasha?”
“After the other day, I believe it’s best to do that in small doses. I can’t change what happened to me years ago, but I can change my negative thoughts and behaviors the past created. I feel like we started that process today.”
“And I feel like I’m being told I suck as a boyfriend and need to give you more space to make your own decisions.”
“That’s because you are being told that,” Sasha says before giggling. Leaning over, she kisses my cheek. “That was a joke. I love you.”
“I suggest you continue giving Sasha support, love and honesty, and Sasha, along with giving Mr. Burke those things in return, I suggest you keep an open line of communication and tell him when you need his guidance.”
“How did this turn into couples therapy?” I ask, “and isn’t that a bad sign?”
“Attending therapy doesn’t mean your relationship is in trouble. Look at it as being proactive. If you’re truly in it for the long haul, you need to nurture your relationship, and that’s what you did today.”
This lady’s too formal, but she does know her shit. I’ll do anything she says if it’ll benefit Sasha and make us a stronger couple.
I’m going to let my girl know soon how serious I am about being in it for the long haul.
Sasha
“Thank you for going to counseling with me,” I say to Greyson as we eat Chinese takeout on the sofa. Theresa’s been caring for her ailing mother, so we’ve been eating out more than usual.
“Don’t thank me. I obviously needed the session.”
“We weren’t trying to pick on you.”
“I know, but I’m frustrated with myself. I feel like I’m failing you at a time when you need me the most. Or, maybe you don’t need me.” He shakes his head. “I mean, my help. Maybe you don’t need it like I thought you did.”
Clutching his wrist, I stare into his eyes.
“That’s not true at all. I do need your support, but I also need to handle some responsibilities on my own to prove to myself that I’m capable.
“Like when you wanted to make my appointment for me with Katherine. It was thoughtful, and it didn’t seem like a big deal to you, but for a girl who’s never been responsible in her life, completing those little tasks are huge for my self-esteem.
“It felt good to make the appointment. Katherine was only trying to help by pointing that out.”
“I guess.”
Setting both of our boxes of noodles on the coffee table, I scoot closer to him.
“Don’t feel bad for helping me. After I opened up to Katherine about my past, I needed you like I’ve never needed anyone. You were who I wanted to comfort me, and you stepped up in a way a lot of men couldn’t if faced with the same uncomfortable situation.
“You said you felt blindsided that day. Would it help for you to know more about what happened to me?”
“I want to know more but only so I don’t do something that may trigger bad memories for you. I don’t think it would be wise for me to know all the gritty details.
“I fear it could land me in prison after I hunted those men down and put bullets in their brains.”
“Yeah, I need you with me, not behind bars.”
Greyson shifts to better face me, but he struggles to maintain eye contact.
“You were terrified I was going to put you in freezing water that day. Do baths and cool showers act as a trigger for you?”
“Yes, and I don’t take baths, but it doesn’t mean I couldn’t one day. I enjoy having sex with you, and that’s something I never believed was possible with a man, so maybe I’ll be able to enjoy sharing a bath with you or time in a hot tub.”
Greyson smiles. “I’d like that, but I don’t want to push you or surprise you with something that’s a trigger. Is there anything else?”
“Alonso was the main dealer for my parents. He had three or four friends, couriers I guess you’d call them, who were always at the house when I was there.”
His hands start to fist, so I thread our fingers together. Greyson gazes at me, and I see the pain and trepidation in hearing what I may say next.
“They loved to play poker. When I would come in and out of consciousness, while they had me drugged up, I’d hear poker chips clanking and cards shuffling, along with that splitting sound of someone breaking the deck.
“It would startle me, so when I hear those noises, it creates a negative reaction. If you like to play poker, would you mind not playing it at our place?”
“Would I mind?” He yanks his hand free and slides it into my hair. “I don’t think you understand what I’d give up for you. After hearing what you told me, I’d never play cards around you.”
He brandishes a boyish grin. “Besides, everyone always beats my ass at poker, so I don’t like to play. I’m not fond of engaging in things I’m not good at.”
I sigh. “You’re adorable.”
“Is there anything else I should know?”
“They’re small things I can handle. Look, what I went through was horrible, but thankfully, I wasn’t fully coherent for all of it. Yes, the addiction those men created in me screwed up my life for years, but had I not gone through what I did, Camilla and I wouldn’t have found you and Ellis, and we wouldn’t have Liam.”
“Never say that. I’m not worth all that you were forced to endure. Never could I be enough to justify what those vile men stole from you.”
“You’re worth it to me, and that’s why I’m going to be OK. It was worth it to have found you.”
“Actually, I found you, Ladybug. I’m the one who carried you out of that shithole apartment, and I was never the same afterward. I had to see you the next day to know you were all right.
“The pull was that strong, and as soon as I witnessed you downing Pixie Stix powder while bopping around my house to pop music, I wanted you to be mine. It just took me a while to find the courage to make it happen.”
“I’ve always thought it was Ellis who carried me out of there. That means you saw me at my worst.”
“I saw someone who needed help, and once I felt you in my arms, I wanted that help to come from me.”
“I love you. I love you so dang much.” I sling my arms around his neck, and he falls back on the sofa. I kiss him, touch him and show him all the appreciation I can for saving my life.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Sasha
“This is your parents’ home?” I ask Greyson as we pull into a long, paved driveway about forty minutes outside of Denver.
“Yep, and hundreds of acres stretch on behind it. It’s a gold mine since available property is so scarce in the state.”
“You said it was a ranch-style home. It’s more like four homes attached to one another, and the big front yard and trees remind me of the south.”
“I thought you’d like the place.”
“I love it.” The Burkes’ home is made of grey and brown stone, but it’s the accents that make it beautiful and unique.
There are wooden beams in various locations to add a rustic cabin feel, and some of the windows are designed in unusual shapes like ovals and triangles.
The front porch light fixtures look like old-fashioned lanterns, and I want to get closer to examine them.
Greyson takes hold of my sweaty hand as I stare at the mansion.
“Once we get our things out of the car, I’m moving it into my parents’ garage. The property’s going to be cramped once everyone arrives, and I refuse to park the Wraith in the grass.”
“I’m so nervous about today and meeting your parents.” Pulling my hand free, I rub my palms on
my yellow sundress.
“For the hundredth time this morning, don’t be nervous.”
“Easy for you to say. You know almost everyone who’s attending.”
As I get out of the vehicle, a pretty, young woman in a dressy white tank top and black capris exits the front door and scampers down the few steps on the stone porch. She’s beautiful, and I’ve seen her in photos at home.
“Hi, I’m Aspen, and you must be Sasha,” she says before she sticks out her hand that’s dainty and slender like the rest of her.
“Yes, hi.”
She covers her chest. “I’m sorry. I guess I should’ve said more. I’m Greyson’s sister-in-law, Lawrence’s wife.”
“Right. It’s nice to meet you.”
“I thought I could help you with your things. Mary Ann has a room set up for you and Camilla to get ready in, and I heard Aunt Estella say something about the stylist arriving shortly to do your hair.
“I’ve never had my hair done outside of a salon before.”
Aspen rolls her eyes. “Trust me, when you’re new to this family, you’ll say never have I often. The Burkes keep things interesting.” She leans in and murmurs, “They like to run the show, so I’ve learned to roll with it and let them plan things how they want.”
“Don’t scare her off before she even meets the family,” Greyson says as he comes around the car carrying his tux and a small suitcase we packed to stay the night.
Leaning into Aspen, he gives her a kiss on the cheek.
“Where are my brother and Ellis?”
“Lawrence is in the study with Ron and James, and Ellis and Camilla haven’t arrived yet, but they’re on their way.” Aspen snickers. “Estella’s already called them three times.”
“Camilla’s not in the house?” I ask, grimacing. “I told her she wasn’t supposed to see the groom on her wedding day. If she’d stayed with us last night, she’d be here right now.”
Aspen puts her hands on her hips. “What was her response to that?”