Addicted to Love (Bayou Devils MC Book 2)

by A. M. Myers

  “You know I say it with love. But seriously, I’m worried about you. Are you okay?”

  I nod, looking away from her. “Yeah. I’m fine.”

  “Fine equals definitely not okay. What’s going on?”

  Yanking my chin out of her grip, I shake my head. “It’s really nothing. I’m just an idiot.”

  “Hey, you’re not an idiot,” Ali says softly and I turn to her, the concern on her face is making me feel like I’m going to cry again. I force a smile.

  “Sounds like you need to meet my good friend, Jose,” Izzy says and I turn to her, wincing at the thought at her trying to set me up with a man again.

  “Please tell me you’re talking about tequila and not an actual man named Jose.”

  She nods. “I am. Trust me, some good margaritas and you’ll forget all about whoever hurt you.”

  Oh, if only it were that easy. It figures the one time I fall in love again, it ends in disaster. That’s the bitch of it, too. I still love him and there is a part of me that wonders if I always will.

  “Enough about me. Tell us all about how Logan swooped in and saved the day.”

  Ali grins and I know I’m off the hook. She sighs and as she launches into her story, I resolve myself to let this go once and for all. I have a good life and Chance does not get to take that away from me.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chance

  I’ve been run over by a truck.

  At least that’s what it feels like. Groaning, I sit up in bed and swing my legs over the side, dropping my head into my hands as I struggle to wake up. Jesus. I don’t think I’ve ever slept so hard in my life, but I guess that’s what thirty-six hours without sleep will do to you. Yesterday was supposed to be a pretty chill day. I was going to read through some of the files of upcoming cases for the PI business and scout out a new hotel for us to use on rescues. All that changed with a single phone call.

  Thinking back over it, I shake my head. We were scheduled to pick up Sadie today, but she called us yesterday, freaked out because her boyfriend was acting weird and she wanted to leave immediately. We all jumped into action, rushing over there as soon as he left and we weren’t nearly as prepared as we should have been. She was terrified he would come back at any minute, so we had to move quickly, shoving as many of her clothes as we could into bags. When Kodiak and I got her out of there and drove her to the hotel, I was finally able to breathe a little easier, but it was short lived. Her boyfriend showed up and we were locked in the hotel room until Smith and Storm got there to hold him off. It took two more hotel changes and several irate calls to Streak to figure out that he had installed an app on her phone to track her. We normally make the girls leave their phones behind but like I said, everything was fucked up yesterday.

  Sighing, I lift my head and peek over at the clock on the nightstand.

  12:15 p.m.

  I guess it’s a good thing I’m working with the PI business today and I can make my own hours. Standing, I stretch and take a step toward the bathroom when my foot hits something soft on the floor. I study the red ball of fabric for a second before picking it up and the smell of coconuts fills my nose. Carly. Images from last night flash through my head and my eyes widen as I turn to look at the door. We were in the kitchen and she wasn’t fighting me off like she usually does and then I kissed her and brought her upstairs.

  Shit.

  Spinning around, I glance down at the bed, feeling hopeful but my spirits fall when all I find are empty sheets. What the hell happened after I got her up here? Closing my eyes, I retrace every moment until I fall back on the bed with a curse. Fuck, did I really pass out on her after I finally got her under me again? She’s been avoiding me for two weeks, claiming there’s nothing between us but last night was different – I could see it in her eyes. I was breaking down her walls and I thought she was ready to give us a shot and then, like an idiot, I fell asleep and gave her the opportunity to overthink things and freak out.

  “Fuck!” I shout, rubbing my hand over my face as I fall onto my back and punch the mattress next to me. With a growl, I sit up and shove off the bed, stalking into the bathroom and tossing the shirt into the hamper with the smell of coconuts lingering in the air. It’s like she surrounds me and I fucking love it. After getting undressed, I turn on the shower and try to remember more of last night but no matter how hard I try, the last thing I remember is watching her sweet little ass disappear into the bathroom. I can’t believe I was so close to getting everything I’ve wanted since the moment I met her and I lost it all because I was too tired to wait five fucking minutes.

  Tipping my head back, I let the water run over my hair and sigh. I’ll just have to grovel. She may like to play tough, but I know how easily she gave into me last night, felt the way her body melted into my arms, and the shivers that ran down her skin from my touch. She’s fighting it, but she wants this just as much as I do. I’ve seen the pain she works so hard to hide and I know she thinks she has perfectly valid reasons for keeping me at arm’s length but that’s just not going to work for me. I’m not like any of the other guys she’s been with and I’m not just going to give up. Not that I could even if I wanted to.

  With new resolve, I turn off the shower and step out, grabbing the towel off the rack. I get dressed quickly and grab my phone before walking down the hallway to Streak’s lair. I knock twice and he yells for me to enter. He’s perched behind three large computer screens and his fingers are flying across the keyboard. Totally focused on the screen in front of him, he doesn’t even bother to look up at me.

  “What can I do for you?” he asks and I sit down in the chair next to his desk.

  “You got anything for me?” I asked him to start looking into Carly’s background for me last week. After a week of separation, I was ready to do damn near anything to get any piece of her I could and I’ve become a little obsessed with whoever caused the pain I see in her eyes from time to time. Even thinking about it makes me feel murderous and if I ever find out what happened to her and who is responsible, I have no idea what I’ll do.

  “Yes and no,” Streak says, slapping a folder down on top of the desk in front of me.

  “What does that mean?”

  “It means any information I find just gives me more questions. I’m definitely intrigued by this woman.”

  “Go near her and I’ll kill you,” I snap and he starts laughing, leaning back in his chair.

  “Y’all are just gonna start dropping like flies, huh? First Storm and now you… poor bastards.”

  I flip him off and he laughs again as I open the folder and start going through the pages inside. “What the fuck does all this mean?”

  “Page one is school transcripts – nothing to mention there. Page two is her bank account and if you look at the top of the page, you’ll see she has a balance of twelve million dollars in her savings account.”

  My eyes widen and I glance up at him. “Where did it come from?”

  “Ah, see, now that is the interesting part. I don’t know. It was deposited as cash in nine thousand dollar increments which makes it untraceable and leads me to believe that maybe it’s not really above board.”

  “You think it’s dirty money?”

  He shrugs. “I’m just saying most people don’t put twelve million in cash in their bank accounts.”

  “Can you see who deposited it?”

  He nods, scrolling to one of the side computers. “It looks like it was her mother.”

  “She said her mom was good at getting money out of her ex husbands.”

  “Yeah, I looked at all of them and one did buy Carly and her sister condos but none of them are missing that much money.”

  Flipping through the pages one last time, I nod and stand up before slapping him on the back. “Thanks, man.”

  He nods. “Yeah, no problem but maybe next time, y’all can find uncomplicated women so I don’t have to do all this work.”

  “Now, where’s the fun in that?” I ask wi
th a smile on my face and he shakes his head.

  “Oh, by the way, I got some information about the case you’re working today.” He hands me another folder and I nod before ducking out of his office. Blaze is walking toward me.

  “Chance. You heading out soon?” he asks and I nod.

  “Yeah, just gotta take care of something and then I’m out of here.”

  He slaps me on the shoulder and nods. “Give me an update when you get back in.”

  “You got it, Prez.”

  He walks off down the hallway, slipping into Streak’s office and I go to my room, setting the folders down on top of the dresser before I sink down into the chair in the corner of the room before sending her a text.

  Chance:

  We need to talk about last night.

  * * * *

  I definitely look out of place in this neighborhood sitting in my mid 90’s truck with its faded paint and dented body. Every other car on the block is less than four years old, all shiny and new as they sit in front of a three hundred-thousand-dollar house almost identical to the ones on either side of it. Even the trees planted in the yard look regal and expensive. Sighing, I glance back up at the house and cross my arms over my chest as I wait for something to happen, so I can get it on film for our client. All the waiting with nothing to do but think has got to be the worst part of this job but it’s also the most lucrative business the club runs which means Blaze likes to have more guys on it. And I certainly don’t mind the large paycheck.

  I’ve been here for over an hour, trying to catch our client’s wife with her boyfriend and I’m seriously running out of patience but that could also be due to the fact that I still haven’t heard from Carly. I’ve sent her a few more texts since I woke up, but my phone has been silent and I wonder if we’re going back to the way things were before last night. Naw, that’s not gonna happen. I can’t stand two more weeks without her. I’m sure some people would tell me to just back off and give her a little space but I can’t. Ever since we met, all I want to do is be around her. I can’t afford to let her build her walls back up. She’ll shut me out no matter how much she wants me; I just know it.

  It’s crazy it has only been a couple of weeks since I met her because it feels like I’ve known her forever, like she was always a part of me and I wonder if this is what Logan felt when he met Ali. It would explain why he was such a mess for a little while. She won’t admit it, but I think she feels the same. I’ve caught her looking at me when she thinks I’m not paying attention and it would be hard to miss the longing in her eyes. I’m desperate to peel back the layers and see the real Carly, the one behind all the casual sex and loneliness. Grabbing my phone, I fire off one last text to her.

  Me:

  You running again is not going to work for me.

  Pressing send, I toss it back down in the cup holder and hope it works. If she won’t respond to any of my other texts, maybe making her mad will work or maybe she’ll just keep ignoring me. I’m honestly not getting my hopes up. It doesn’t matter though. I’ll do whatever I’ve got to do to get her. Walking away now is not an option. Not after last night when I thought I was finally going to get everything that I’ve ever wanted. I’m fucking addicted to her – her kiss, her touch, and every little thing about her, even the things that drive me insane.

  Sighing, I look back up at the house and sit up straight, grabbing the camera out of the passenger seat as a car pulls into the driveway and the target climbs out, walking up to the front door holding the hand of a man who is most definitely not her husband. Aiming the camera across the street, I start snapping shots as they kiss. She wraps her arms around his neck and he slips a hand down to her ass. Pulling back, she smiles up at him before reaching behind her and opening the front door. She pulls him inside and I pull the camera away from my face and grab the folder out of the seat, flipping through the info that Streak gave me.

  Andy, the guy who hired us, is an old friend of Blaze’s and he’s been married to Helen for ten years. Andy asked Blaze to look into it about two months ago when he found underwear in the laundry basket that weren’t his and honestly, what we’ve found disgusts me. The man she’s with tonight is boyfriend three out of five. They’re kept on a rotation and it seems none of them know about the others. I just feel bad for Andy. I’ve been in his shoes before and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.

  Glancing back up at the house, I wince and do my best not to throw up. Helen and Andy live in a nice residential area on the outskirts of Baton Rouge. Their place is this cute little yellow house that makes you think of your grandma and this bitch has got her tits pressed up against the window while number three nails her from behind. Absolutely anyone could walk by at any moment and see all she’s got to offer but I suppose that’s probably part of the appeal for her. Trying to keep my lunch down, I raise the camera to my face and snap more photos.

  “Fucking classy, people,” I mutter to myself as homeboy pulls her away from the window and puts her on her hands and knees. All I can see is his top half as he thrusts into her and I lower the camera, disgusted. I need to start working at the shop more. This shit pisses me off.

  I glance over at my phone, hoping that maybe this is the one time she’ll text me back. She can’t stay mad forever, right? My phone buzzes and I grab it.

  Carly:

  Tough shit.

  Carly:

  STOP texting me.

  Growling, I throw the phone back into the cup holder and cross my arms over my chest. That’s fine. She can fight me but I’m not giving up. I’ve been waiting for a long fucking time for a girl like Carly to come along and she’s got no idea what she’s in store for. I won’t stop until she’s mine.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Carly

  Shadows dance across the ceiling, lulling me into an almost dream-like state as I lie in bed staring at them. Or maybe it’s the fact that I’ve been up for close to twenty-four hours now, but I can’t close my eyes. Whenever I do, I see him. Chance consumes my thoughts and I can’t stop picturing the first time we had sex – how he broke down my barriers so effortlessly – or two nights ago when I had everything I was too scared to wish for. I can feel his hands brushing over my skin, his touch so tender and possessive that of course I fell in love with him because how could I not? He bulldozed his way into my life with a perfect mixture of cool complicated bad boy and sweet, steady man and I never stood a damn chance.

  All night long, I’ve tried to marry that man with who I now know he really is and it just doesn’t make sense. I can’t see Chance doing something like that to me, but I guess that just shows you how stupid I am. Even when the truth is staring me in the face, I still don’t believe it. It takes a certain kind of coldness to lie as easily as he did, to look me in the face as I laid down my rules and promise me he wasn’t seeing anyone else. How could I fall for a man like that? Am I really that clueless? Tears sting my eyes and my dad’s face pops into my mind. A sob is ripped from my chest as I think about Chance’s wife – I did the same thing to her that my mother did to my father and I hate me for it. I should have known better. I should have walked away from him as soon as he looked me in the eye.

  I can’t stop replaying the last three weeks over and over again, looking for any sign I missed but I keep coming up empty. He’s been a model boyfriend, even if I wasn’t calling him that. Friday night flashes through my mind again and fresh tears roll down my cheeks. Everything about it was perfect up until the moment I walked out of the bathroom and God, even in those few short seconds where I had decided to say yes to him, I imagined a life with him. A full and beautiful life where I didn’t have to be the broken damaged girl anymore. I could just be his and that would be enough because what else would I need if he loved me? I imagined things I would have never allowed myself to imagine before and this pain I’m experiencing now is the exact reason why. I feel nothing except piercing, gaping sadness in the spot where my heart used to be. There’s no need for walls to protect it anymore b
ecause he stole in and smashed it under his boot.

  My phone beeps on the bedside table and I turn my head to the side, sighing as I stare at it. The scent of cinnamon drifts up from his shirt and my stomach rolls as my lip wobbles again. God, I’m pathetic. The phone beeps again and my eyes narrow as I glare at it. I swear to God, if he’s texting me again to tell me that I can’t run from him or that we need to talk, I might kill him. I’m sure he doesn’t realize I know about his double life yet, but seriously, who the hell does this guy think he is? Why pursue me so hard if this could never go anywhere? And what does it say about me that I fell in love with a man like that? Sighing, I sit and up and drag myself over to the edge of the bed before grabbing my phone and unlocking it.

  Ivy:

  Lunch today?

  Ivy:

  1? Our usual spot?

  Me:

  Sounds good.

  The text from my sister after weeks of radio silence is a welcome surprise and I smile but my lack of sleep is quickly catching up with me. There is no way in hell I’m missing this lunch with her, though. I’ve been too worried about her. Tossing the phone next to me on the bed, I push off the mattress and drag myself into the bathroom, dreaming about a big cup of coffee when I get done with my shower. When I glance in the mirror, I gasp and drop my gaze down to the countertop. I look about as good as I feel and my mother would be absolutely horrified. Not like I care though. I just need to make myself look presentable enough that Ivy won’t notice because the last thing I want to do is talk about this with anyone.

  Turning away from the mirror, I quickly undress and climb into the shower, trying my best to avoid looking at the bench where Chance and I had sex on several occasions but failing. Before I met Chance, I never had sex in a shower because it seemed too intimate and after experiencing it with him, I still believe that to be true. My heart aches thinking about the way he held me and kissed me as steam billowed around us. With him, I felt cherished and loved even when I couldn't bear to entertain the possibility of us and that's why it was so easy to say yes to him Friday night. He made me believe I could find happiness.