The Future Is Yours: A Novel
Page 5
BOYCE: Yes, ma’am, that is correct. My wife is a corporate attorney, and has been a great asset.
REP. AMANDA BLAKELEY (R-AZ): And did your wife counsel you in advance of this hearing?
BOYCE: She helped me prepare, if that’s what you’re asking. I have tremendous professional respect for her. The way her mind works is next-level. And on top of that, she’s just really good. You know? Her ethics. She’s not only worried about winning, she’s got this deep sense of right and wrong that goes into everything she ever does. She is…honestly, I don’t use this word lightly, she’s a hero.
REP. AMANDA BLAKELEY (R-AZ): And yet, whenever you address her, it is as Princess.
BOYCE: Yeah, but that’s just an inside joke. Her name’s Leila, so—like Princess Leia, in Star Wars? ’Cause she’s tough. In the movie, when they go rescue her, she says, “Aren’t you a little short to be a stormtrooper?” And she gives them shit…Sorry, she criticizes them…for such a poorly planned operation. It was Adhi’s joke originally, and believe me, my wife is a strong feminist; it would not fly if it were demeaning in the least.
REP. AMANDA BLAKELEY (R-AZ): And have you ever had concern about her ongoing relationship with your co-founder?
BOYCE: Oh God no. Wow, you guys got this all wrong. Our relationship never would’ve even happened without him, and he’s been the biggest supporter of us since the very start.
BEST-MAN SPEECH
SOURCED FROM CHAUDRY’S PERSONAL COMPUTER
Delivered April 16, 2017
Good evening, everyone. Thank you to the Keeners and the Boyces for hosting this beautiful evening. That ceremony was pretty incredible, right?
For those of you who don’t know me, I’m Adhvan. The groom’s best friend, best man, and as he once said, his brother from another mother. Which I’m sure he only said because he didn’t have any actual siblings, but neither did I, so I guess it’s lucky we found each other.
I’m pretty nervous to be speaking in front of this many people, so please forgive me if I keep my head buried in my notes. I would do the picture-them-in-their-underwear thing, but you’re just all too good-looking. I’d end up feeling alternately inadequate or turned-on, and all in all, quite uncomfortable. As I’ve probably just made you feel. Kinda my thing.
Now, I’ve known both the bride and the groom since they were freshmen at Stanford. Ben and I were roommates. He snored, in case you were wondering. And he gave himself pep talks in the mirror. And there are even more embarrassing things I could say, but knowing what he could say about me, I will stop there.
I’m sure it will shock no one to know that in college, I was too scared to talk to girls. Or, honestly, most humans, regardless of gender. But Ben was so confident, he would ask any girl for her phone number. Seriously, he asked out our RA. And I will not say how that went, but I spent more than a few nights sleeping in the study lounge.
I don’t mean to talk out of turn. But it’s important for you to know, Ben wasn’t afraid to talk to any girl, ever.
Until Leila. Who was the one girl I did talk to.
Leila and I were in a bio lab for one of our core electives first semester. We got randomly picked to be lab partners. Somehow, through the process of dissecting a fetal pig, a friendship was born. She and I would study together and eat Thai food in my dorm room. Which, of course, I shared with Ben. The first time that Ben came in when Leila was over was the first time I ever saw him tongue-tied in my life. I think the first thing he ever said to her was, “Hey. Ben is my name. You like classes?” Hardcore fail. And when he was gone, Leila asked me…“What is your roommate’s deal?”
So, second semester rolls around, and Leila and I decided to both take Intro to Western Philosophy. Ben had already taken his World Thought core requirement, but knowing Leila was in, he signed up too.
In class, I’m used to sitting by myself in the back. But I somehow end up with the most beautiful girl at Stanford next to me, and the most popular guy in our freshman class on the other side.
Ben was constantly trying to flirt. But if any of you have ever seen Leila in class—and I know some of her law school classmates are here—she does not mess around. She has a whole system with color-coded highlighters. And she had another class right after philosophy, so she could never come have lunch with us. Ben was dying.
Luckily, there was a group project at the end of the semester, and you got to pick your own groups and topics, so it ended up being the three of us. And Ben had this brilliant idea that our topic would be the Philosophy of Love. Eye-roll, I know. We were presenting on the four different Loves covered by Aristotle’s Poetics.
So we spent a lot of time together in the library, and back in our dorm. Through all of it, Ben’s looking for a perfect chance to ask Leila out. But the moment never comes. I tell him, just ask for her number, she likes you. But he says no, I want to make it special.
The day of our presentation rolls around, and we’re giving our report for the class. It’s a big section with seventy students. And we break it down so I’m quoting the text, Leila is doing the lion’s share of explaining Aristotle’s concepts. Then Ben gives an example for each one. We get through Agape (love for everyone, like charity) and Storge (which is parental love), and then we get to Philia, brotherly love, and that’s when Ben goes off-book. He says that it’s like what he feels for me, his best friend. It was nice, but also very embarrassing.
Even worse, I can see where this is going. And probably you can too. Because the last love is Eros. Romantic and sexual passion. The root of the word “erotic.” I introduce it, Leila explains it, and Ben—right in front of the teacher and the whole class, he says, “This is the feeling I am developing for my teammate Leila.” And then right there, at the end of our final presentation, he asks her out, in front of the whole class. And she freezes. But from the front row, one of our classmates just yells, “Say yes!” And pretty soon, everybody starts cheering. Somehow, no lie, they started up a chant. “Say yes! Say yes!” Even our professor got into it. “Say yes! Say yes!”
I’m pretty sure Leila was not thrilled to be asked out like that. But she had no choice at that point, with our final grade hanging in the balance.
While Ben and I lived together, I had a front-row seat to watching these two get closer, building the foundation for an amazing life. We had some great times, all three of us.
And then, the two of them decided to move in together. And while it was a delight to see my best friend so happy, it was painful to see him leave me for a girl.
Watching the two of them here today, of course, I know it was for the best. I know that when there is an invitation to love and happiness, you must, in the words of our entire Intro to Western Philosophy class…Say yes.
So, ladies and gentlemen, I hope we can all learn from these two. Raise a glass to the new Mr. and Mrs. Boyce, and as you clink glasses—say yes.
EMAIL—JANUARY 8, 2021
From: Adhvan Chaudry
To: Ben Boyce
B—
I’m in.
Let’s do this.
—A
REPLY
FUUUUUUCK YEAAAAAHHHHHH BROOOOOO!
You are NOT gonna regret this!
REPLY
B—
Before we get ahead of ourselves, we’re gonna need some help.
Materials, lab space, someone who knows the fabrication side.
My buddy Nikolai is still at Stanford on a post-doc.
Cool if I hit him up?
—A
EMAIL
From: Adhvan Chaudry
To: Nikolai Guriev
N—
I’m quitting Google to work on a startup, which is roughly based on the device I proposed in my thesis.
&
nbsp; You were always the one who believed in this the most.
You should take a sabbatical and come help us make it work.
—A
REPLY
So you want to build a time machine, eh? Eeeenteresting. Ummmm lemme know what the comp would look like.
REPLY
N—
Currently we are pre-funding.
Comp at this point would be all equity.
Ben is offering 5 points.
Considering that we’re seeking a valuation of $100M…
that’s potentially a LOT of money.
As soon as we get a prototype working, we’ll make that easy.
—A
REPLY
“As soon as we get a prototype working”? Hahahahahaha. Of your time machine? Hahahahaha. Greeaaaat opportunity friendo.
Also, you’re doin this with Ben, meaning like your old roommate from undergrad? Isn’t he a bit of a twat? You sure he’s not just using you for the supercomputer btwn your ears?
REPLY
N—
I know that no venture is a sure thing, but this one is more likely than you might imagine.
And Ben is not a bad guy.
He’s just…a business guy.
And—rare among that category—a good person.
He has had my back at some crucial moments in my life.
I would follow him into literal battle.
So yes, I’m confident in him to lead on this.
—A
REPLY
Okie dokie, jeez, don’t mean to shit on your friend/CEO choice, you 2 need some time alone?
Srsly tho lets talk tech on this. Esp bc even when you were in the pits of crankin on your thesis, YOU told ME how far QC was from being at a place to make this remotely workable.
REPLY
N—
Of course, I would not be embarking upon this journey if my mind had not been changed on that front.
It was, my first week working at Google.
Not just changed. Blown.
It quickly became apparent to me that quantum processing
(at least, in the rarefied space of highly funded commercial ventures)
was MUCH further along than I’d imagined.
The quantum supremacy announcement from 2019,
that’s nothing compared to where they’re at today.
Check out the attached doc.
Just need a materials lab and hardware expert, and we’ll be up and running.
—A
(The aforementioned “attached doc” has been REDACTED, but refers to Quantum Computing Research Protocols, which Chaudry downloaded from Google servers before his exit.)
REPLY
OOooohhhohoho lookit you, Scooby Doo, absconding w the planz to the Death Star!
For real tho, how many people even know Google is this far w quantum? This is nuts.
OK maybe swing on by Monday and let’s beat out what this would cost. I could probably get you a lab and call in some favors with the manu team. Leeet’s do the TIME WARP AGAAAIIIIN!!!!
CHAPTER 4
EXPERIMENTAL REPORT—1/22/2021
Prototype 1
Materials Cost: $3,229
Manu Cost: $4,812
Test Result: N/A
Notes: Power supply insufficient for quantum-processing needs.
EMAIL
From: Ben Boyce
To: Adhvan Chaudry
Hey man what’s the deal with this Nikolai guy you’re bringing on? He seems like a prick. I’m the CEO, that means I’m his boss, but every time I come around the lab for an update he starts talking tech just to point out how I don’t understand it. You know how that condescending shit gets to me.
REPLY
B—
No surprise that you and N are not exactly simpatico.
But trust me.
You know how these CS guys are—
can’t measure dicks so they measure brains.
It’s just how he rolls.
Plus he’s the one with lab access.
To build out what he’s providing us with for basically no upfront cost, we’d need a couple hundred K.
Let me deal with him.
—A
EXPERIMENTAL REPORT—1/29/2021
Prototype 2
Materials Cost: $5,103
Manu Cost: $3,994
Test Result: N/A
Notes: Quantum processor failed to run OS.
EMAIL
From: Ben Boyce
To: Adhvan Chaudry
Dude when I stopped by after dinner, Nikolai was sleeping on the floor, I think deadass passed out. Like he didn’t wake up until I practically yelled in his face and then he looked like shit and was semi incoherent. I think he was on something.
REPLY
B—
It’s probably bc we worked on the build all through last night.
Yes, he uses pharmaceuticals.
So does almost everyone on the dev side.
Cut him some slack.
—A
EXPERIMENTAL REPORT—2/1/2021
Prototype 3
Test Result: Failure
Materials Cost: $2,895
Manu Cost: $5,059
Notes: Finally, our first real failure. System succeeded in booting up and performing basic Q-processing. Unstable but ran OS. Clearly, no evidence of transtemporal data transmission, but hey, we’re just getting started.
EMAIL
From: Ben Boyce
To: Adhvan Chaudry
OK man what’s with this? I knew it wasn’t gonna be easy but three prototypes in, I’m almost maxed out, and you’re celebrating a failure bc it booted up? $25K to what, run Windows? I’m all in on this but my “all” isn’t that much.
REPLY
B—
First, fuck Windows, I built this OS myself.
Second, we need runway, and I dunno how long it’ll take.
We’ve already simulated it. It should work.
“Should work” is when the work starts.
How much more? Good question.
Nikolai and I figure, back-of-the-napkin calculation, another $25K to start.
And that’s with no one drawing any salary.
We need to be able to ride this out.
What about Lei’s family?
—A
EXPERIMENTAL REPORT—2/6/2021
Prototype 4
Test Result: N/A
Materials Cost: $1,895
Manu Cost: $3,469
Notes: Failed to boot. In trying to minimize cost, we’re back to a machine that won’t even boot. Shocking, I know.
EMAIL
From: Ben Boyce
To: Thomas Keener
Hi Thom,
Hope you are doing well! Really looking forward to seeing you guys again soon and meeting the newest addition to the fam. Congratulations, Grandpa! You must be so thrilled.
I think that Leila may have already told you a bit about the situation, but I am writing to let you know about an investment opportunity for an exciting tech startup business that I am developing with my good friend Adhvan Chaudry (he was my best man at the wedding).
Now, I still remember the advice you gave me on my first two startups, though I wasn’t ready to hear it then: Find your unfair advantage. And in this case, I know what that unfair advantage is. Adhvan. He is truly a once-in-a-lifetime genius at computer engineering. I went to school with a
lot of smart people, and I feel confident in saying—I have never met anyone who matches Adhi for raw creative problem-solving ability. Combined with my business acumen, we’ve got the team to hit this out of the park.
Our Seed Round will involve raising several million to build the business, but before we even get started on that, we need to get a prototype up and running, and that means capitalizing the business at around $50K for basic physical material costs. So I am seeking that amount as a small-business loan, with expectation to repay in 12 months at 18% return (I know that’s high, but I am quite confident in our revenue by that time).
No pressure, of course! I just know how much you’ve wanted to bring Leila into your own family business, and I am hoping perhaps my startup could become a bit of a family business as well.
Let me know!
Ben
EXPERIMENTAL REPORT—2/11/2021
Prototype 5
Materials Cost: $2,413
Manu Cost: $5,223
Test Result: Failure
Notes: Frustrating anomaly. We are booting and showing quantum-entangled data states, but still no data transmission. Not clear why no response when we ping future timeframe.
EMAIL REPLY