Red Dress

by Bridget Finklaire

  “Make it an hour and a half at least. Maybe more. I’ve got two contracts to go through.”

  Katy disappeared into the street below, heading towards a restaurant she knew, not that she’d be able to eat much.

  Sitting at a small table in the French-style Brasserie, her heart was racing. She felt as lustful as the teenager who’d spied Tony in the rugby team all those years ago. A fifteen-year-old’s libido seemed to be coursing through her, but she had to hold out. Her stomach lurched as she turned her thoughts to Richard and the children. How could she break up the family she’d loved and nurtured for so long? Dreading what could lay ahead, she forced herself to imagine the scenario. She was petrified of making the wrong decision and hurting everyone in the process. Poor Richard. He didn’t deserve this. Abandoned by his mother and now by his wife, well his second wife. He’d left Anita to be with Katy, back in the days when they’d worked together, when she, Katy, had been in human resources. And that was another thing. He’d broken up his first marriage to be with her! She couldn’t leave him now, not after he’d risked everything.

  The waitress arrived with a bowl of Moules Marinière and a glass of sparkling water. A large cognac might have been a better choice, she thought, her hand shaking as she reached for the drink. On second thoughts, better to be sober when reality was hitting you in the face, no matter how frightening it was.

  Plucking a mussel from its shell, the therapist within wondered if it was the thrill of the chase and nothing more. Was she going back into her past to resolve something? Was there such a thing as a mid-life crisis? Perhaps she was going through one ? It could all fizzle out, and she’d have lost something precious – her family! What if it was an illusion, just the smoke and mirrors of infatuation? She was a wife and mother, for fudge sake, and a respected therapist. What would people say? Her reputation would be tarnished. No. She couldn’t let this thing run away with her. She tackled another mussel and slurped at a spoonful of juice. Three more mouthfuls and she’d managed to eat about half the starter portion she’d ordered. Rinsing her fingers in a bowl of lemon water, she was about to reach for the napkin, when a vision of Tony pierced through her rambling thoughts: his mesmerizing eyes, his broad smile, that strawberry-blonde stubble over his strong jaw. Of course she was meant to be with him! All this spiritual awakening, all this healing she’d done, it was about finding happiness, wasn’t it? Working out what mattered to her? She’d been trapped in an airless life, wanting to break free and soar, but not knowing how to or where to go. Without a doubt, her deeper self knew she was meant to be with her Twin Soul. She imagined them working together, humanitarian work, something that would make a difference in the world. Her heart swelled. It was obvious! Look at all the signs, the soul contract, the way it had happened in a flash!

  The waitress arrived and topped up her water. Katy sat back, sipping at the drink and staring at the French-style Moulin Rouge posters on the wall opposite. They reminded her of her honeymoon in Paris with Richard. How could she be so stupid! She couldn’t just up sticks and leave the man she’d been married to for almost eighteen years! This thing with Tony couldn’t last. She heard her mother’s critical voice. It would all end in tears.

  Endlessly moving from certainty to uncertainty, Katy picked at a few more mussels. She was caught in a hall of mirrors. What was true and what was illusion? Was she just a worthless sinner? No nobler than a sex addict at the Priory, no more spiritual than the drunken young girls that spilled out of nightclubs, bare legged in their micro-skirts? Calling for the bill, she settled up and left the restaurant. It was almost time to return to Dinah.

  * * *

  Tony sat on the cream sofa, his legs wide open, his forearms resting on his knees. This dusky-skinned chick, Dinah, had furnished the place with carvings from Bali or India or somewhere. It wasn’t his thing. A wisp of incense rose from a filigree silver box, and he wrinkled his nose. Thank goodness he hadn’t been seen coming here. What the other officers might wonder, he dreaded to think. Still, he wanted to please Katy, and what harm could it do? This woman didn’t know anything about him! He couldn’t believe, for one moment, that she could glean anything just from his name and date of birth! It just wasn’t possible.

  “So! Do I call you Anthony or Tony?” Dinah asked, slipping the papers from his file.

  “Tony’s fine.”

  “Good. We have a lot to go through. I’m going to take you through your contract first, starting with the past, the present and the future potential. Remember it’s the potential we’re looking at? It’s up to you to fulfil it!” Tony smiled, and she carried on. “Then I’ll talk about your relationship with your wife, Lauren, and how that’s playing out, and finally I’ll tell you about you and Katy.”

  “Okay, then.” Tony almost laughed. It didn’t matter to him; he could fuel his latest Katy fantasy while this woman prattled on. She began reading from the charts, and within a few minutes, Tony’s mouth was hanging open. Straightening up and pulling his knees together, he was watching her every move. How could she know all this? Something that disrupted his early school life, a wayward dad, flirtatious and promiscuous in his late teens, a moment of crisis at university, straightening out, possibly by joining the forces, or at least a large organization where there was a clear hierarchy of achievement!

  Had Katy told her? She couldn’t have, she didn’t know half of it herself! He rubbed his temples. “How do you know all this?”

  “It’s all here in the chart! These readings are incredibly accurate when they’re properly interpreted. Were you an addict in your youth? I can see there was a potential, but I’m sure that’s all in the past.”

  Tony opened his mouth to speak, but nothing intelligible came out.

  “You have a powerful libido and always have done. It’s got you into trouble in the past.”

  Sitting up now, and taking notice of everything Dinah was saying, he was becoming utterly confused.

  “Any questions?”

  “Did Katy tell you any of this?”

  “No.”

  “You’ve researched my records?”

  Dinah laughed. “No!”

  His face must be turning pale, he could sense the color draining away. Clasping his hands in front of him to stop the tremor that was forming, he nodded at Dinah to continue.

  She took another sheet of paper from the file. “So, let’s look at you and Lauren,” she said, studying the strange markings and a page of notes she’d made. “Your relationship is strained at best and dysfunctional at worst!” Dinah faltered for a moment. “Is she quite driven? She’d make a good career woman. Strong masculine energy. Probably not that interested in her softer, nurturing side.” She turned her head slightly to take a closer look at the chart. “I can see the initial attraction. There were karmic debts that would have brought you together. Do you have children?”

  “A daughter.”

  “And she returned to work almost immediately after having her?”

  “How—” He stopped himself. “She works long hours in the City. Commutes from our home in Oxfordshire. Leaves before Amber’s up and tries to get back before she goes to bed.”

  “Who looks after Amber?”

  “We had a Nanny when she was little, but my work hours are flexible. I do my bit – take her to the doctors if she’s sick, stay up with her at night if she’s scared. It was me that took her to A&E when she fell off her bike. She’s nine now, so it’s easier.”

  “You sound like a hands-on dad, and that’s something for you to consider. You’ll want to be with Amber, I’m sure!”

  Tony could feel the emotions welling up. He coughed. “I understand her. She’s shy, you see. Finds it hard to make friends. She’s got a few problems. ADHD and Dyslexia.”

  “Oh! I’m sorry.”

  “Lauren’s always busy. Would leave her in front of a video all day, but Amber’s better if she’s out and about. I take her swimming, cycling, to the park. It seems to help.” He was grateful that Dina
h took a moment to let him find his equilibrium.

  “I imagine your marriage showed signs of stress quite early. I could be wrong. I’m only going by the charts.”

  Tony nodded. “I was away with work, and Lauren didn’t like it. Where are you getting all these details from?”

  “I’m an intuitive. It’s not all in the charts, but they provide the sign-posts, the structure, if you like.” Dinah looked at her notes. “Does Lauren like to pamper herself?”

  “She likes a spa break and a bit of retail therapy.”

  “It’s a comfort thing. There’s wounding from childhood. I can see a karmic knot of abandonment. Her fierceness is a shell to protect her vulnerability.”

  “She’s not a bad person.”

  “No! Goodness, no! I get that. Just emotionally compromised. I’m surprised she had children!”

  “It was an accident. Got a bit carried away on our honeymoon and she forgot to take the pill. I wanted a kid and thought it would cement us.”

  “Did it?”

  “For a while, but, well...” He swallowed and looked up at the ceiling. “I started drinking, she started shouting. She slapped me around a couple of times. Just lost it. All cool, ice-maiden one moment, then screaming banshee the next!”

  “With your libido, I’m guessing you had great make-up sex?”

  “We did at first, but I, I...” He fiddled with his left cuff, coughed, and looked up at the plaster coving. Dinah waited. “I lost interest. She’d dress up in sexy undies, the costly stuff, Coco de Mer, is it? Tall and slim with model’s legs, she’s stunning but I just couldn’t, er, rise to the occasion.”

  “I see.” Dinah looked down and shuffled her papers.

  “I, er. When we did, you know, I’d struggle to finish, probably because of all the, er, porn I’d been watching. She’d get upset, then resort to verbal abuse.” He swallowed hard and looked down at the floor. “She’s hit me a few times. She’s quite strong, and she’s taller than me.” He could feel himself blushing. His ears would be crimson by now, and he buried his head in his hands.

  “Can I get you a drink of water?” Dinah went to the kitchen, returning a few moments later with a glass.

  “Thanks.” He took a gulp.

  “Let’s move on to your relationship with Katy, shall we?”

  He instantly felt the clutches of remorse loosen as the stifling guilt melted away. “I’d like that.”

  “Your emotional floodgates must have opened abruptly on meeting Katherine.”

  “This time round, yes. I knew her before, at school. Always liked her, a lot, but it wasn’t as intense as this.”

  “I imagine the sexual chemistry is quite something. You have a 69 energy.”

  Tony sniggered. It was all he could do to hold himself back. ‘Standing to attention’ at work had taken on a whole new meaning these past few weeks. Unless he could hide behind a briefcase or a dossier, it was becoming a source of embarrassment.

  Dinah went through the details of his soul contract with Katy, confirming what he already felt in his heart. His destiny was somehow tied up with hers. She brought out the best in everyone, and especially in him. There was a sense of something more significant when he was with her. Somehow, she glowed in his presence, and her light elevated him, as the spring sun lifts the spirits after winter. He didn’t fully understand ‘karmic locks’ or ‘yin and yang’, but it rang true that they complemented each other.

  “Katy really gets you, Tony. If you need to express yourself or put your foot down, she’ll understand. It won’t be like it is with Lauren. Just remember, you can tell her anything, and she’s not going to shout and scream or hit you. Okay?”

  The doorbell rang, and Dinah pressed the intercom. Katy came running up the steps, iridescent, smiling. He stood up and held her.

  “Thank you so much, Dinah!” she said, pulling away and rummaging in her bag. He watched as she counted out the crisp notes, paying Dinah in cash for the readings.

  “Keep me posted.”

  “We will.”

  A warm unctuous feeling of caramel and cream wrapped itself around Katy as they headed towards the station. “I can’t believe our luck!” she said, her arm around his waist. Pulling her close, his hand on her shoulder, he softly kissed her cheek. On the journey back to Paddington they were inseparable. Looking tenderly into his eyes, she felt sure she could see his soul. Something shot through her, just like it had in the pub the previous Friday. It took her breath away. “Will you marry me?” It just came out. She hadn’t meant to say it. Squirming in her seat, and clasping her hand over her mouth, she wished she could rewind the last few seconds and edit it out. What the hell was she thinking? Women didn’t ask men to marry them! They’d only known each other a few weeks, and they were both already married. Wishing she could fall through a hole in the carriage floor, she desperately tried to think of something.

  Tony smirked and squeezed her hand. “Yes! I will marry you!” He leaned across and smooched her. “This calls for a celebration!”

  “How about Pandora’s? The little cellar bar we went to?”

  “Perfect!” he planted a huge kiss on her lips. With the tension gone, they started to laugh as they chattered about the soul contract and what it meant to them.

  “Let’s not be rash,” said Katy. “We’ll celebrate tonight.” She gave his hand a squeeze. “But next week we’d better work out how we’re going to manage this!”

  “When are you leaving Richard?”

  “Not yet.”

  “Why?”

  “We need to discuss it. It requires careful planning. There are kids involved.”

  “I think I’ll get a motorbike so I can get out of town easily to see Amber.”

  “One step at a time! We need to tread softly before we get to that stage!”

  “Shall I tell Lauren?”

  “No!” Katy shrieked. “Not yet. Give me the weekend to think it through, and I’ll meet you on Monday. How does that sound?”

  “Sounds like a plan!”

  Standing in the crowded vaults at Pandora’s, Tony ordered a bottle of champagne. “We’re celebrating our engagement!” he told the barman. A couple next to them cheered, and a moment later a bucket of ice, a bottle of bubbly and two glasses appeared.

  “Here’s to us!” Tony raised his glass to hers and they took a swig of fizz. A few of the customers who’d been standing at the bar, toasted them, one or two slapping Tony on the back, and wishing them well.

  Finding a dark corner, they French-kissed their way through most of the evening, oblivious to the other clientele.

  “Third time lucky!” said Tony.

  Katy giggled. “Yep! Me too! I want page-boys instead of bridesmaids.” Katy’s first marriage had lasted only a couple of years. They were young and had drifted apart, but she’d told him that already. There were no secrets between them.

  “We should write a book about this. I mean, you couldn’t make it up!”

  “I know!”

  “You write your side, and I’ll write mine. We’ll call it Two Hearts Beat as One”

  “You might have to ask Bono and U2 for that title!” She winked at him before downing her second glass.

  “Most people would die to have a soul contract like ours!”

  “I know! I can’t get over it!”

  “All those married couples who think they’re happy! They don’t have a tenth of what we have!”

  Beaming at him, she touched her hand lightly to his face and he took it in his, kissing it tenderly before saying, “I’m going to frame those soul contracts and hang them on the wall of our house for everyone to see!”

  “Our house? Where are we going to live?”

  “Highgate!”

  They polished off the bottle of champagne.

  “We’d better get going. It’s late,” said Katy, glancing at her watch.

  Standing behind the information board at Paddington Station, it was evident the bubbles had gone to her head and unleashed
something. Passions were at boiling point and keeping their hands off each other was impossible. Pulling at his buttocks, she opened her legs as far as her tailored skirt would allow, pushing her hips forward as she locked her lips to his. Kissing passionately and running their hands over each other, the station dissolved. His breathing grew heavier as he slipped one palm under her top and the other over her backside. A few moments later, he was gently pumping against her, oblivious to the few last-minute revelers making their way home. Tottering on her heels as she leaned into him, her skirt was beginning to ride up, revealing a few inches of thigh. A drunken wag shouted out “Get a bed!”

  “He’s right!” breathed Tony.

  The scruffy young lad turned around and shouted back across the concourse. “I bet he’s got a boner, hasn’t he?” Sniggering loudly, he staggered on towards his platform, swigging from a bottle before pushing through the turnstile.

  Katy giggled and grabbed Tony’s taut bottom, squeezing it with her fingers and urging him towards her.

  “Come on! Let’s go to a hotel right now!” Tony was pleading, his eyes twinkling.

  Perhaps they should. What a soul contract! They were meant to be together, so why not? Something deep inside stopped her. “No! We’re going to wait and do it properly.”

  “Pleeeease!”

  “We can’t stay out all night.”

  A station announcement echoed over the PA. “The 23.33 train to Oxford will depart from Platform 9. Departing in three minutes.”

  “You’d better hurry, or you’ll miss it!”

  “Shit! I’ll be toast!” He gave her one last hug and a quick kiss on the lips before running towards the barrier.

  Katy walked down the steps to the underground and jumped on the first train. Frustrated and alone, she wondered why she hadn’t let Tony have his way. On the other hand, she felt guilty. Tara would say she’d already been unfaithful and in a way, she had. Thou shalt not commit adultery. Her thoughts turned to the family. It was Tilly’s party on Saturday. She’d be seventeen on Tuesday. Katy burst into tears.